Hey there, everybody. Not much new, other than I got Volume 2 of Hellsing. Great book. Oh, and the world has gone crazy and chaos has spread across the globe. Other than that, not much is new.

Why must mankind be so dumb?

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The commander of the Wild Geese, Pip Bernadotte, stood near a window in Integra's office, looking at his reflection and playing with his hat. "For the leader of some secret organization, she sure is late..." he muttered to himself.

Somebody coughed behind him. "I've been here for the past three minutes. You really should pay more attention," Integra informed him as he turned to face her.

"Oh, good evening Lady Hellsing. My name is Pip Bernadotte. It's such an honor to-" Pip was interupted by Integra's hand being forced in front of his face.

"I know who you are. I read your file. And you're hired. Right now, I have other things to worry about. Would you mind moving out of the way? I need to get to my desk..." she motioned him to the side. He silently stepped out of her way, and watched her open a drawer in her desk. "Aha, just what I need..." she triumphantly held up a bottle of headache medicine. "I have a horrible migrane, and these should help."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Lady Hellsing. Um... what would you like me to do?" he asked her, hoping for orders to keep him from being bored out of his mind.

"For now, I just need your men on guard duty. There is a mission being prepared, but none of your men are highly trained enough for that. Unless they know how to fight vampires, which I doubt," she told him as she popped a couple of pills into her mouth.

"Hah... hah hah..." Pip chuckled sarcasticly. "Normally I'd say something about vampires not existing, but... that guy in red proved me wrong."

"That reminds me, how did that go?" Integra was curious as to how badly the interview had gone. She took her seat at her desk and began to search it for a cigar, but was dissappointed to find none. "Oh bugger..."

"Oh, it was great. Just great. Hey, did you know that that guy in red can walk through walls?" Pip seemed to be slightly unnerved. "Yeah, he just waltzed right through the wall and sat down in your chair."

Integra raised an eyebrow. She would have to punish him for touching her chair. "Go on..."

"Then he started asking me about what type of weapons my men where trained with. Pray tell, since when do silver bullets come as standard issue? He seemed to think all soldiers used them!" Pip was becoming more and more unnerved. Apparently, Alucard had obviously screwed with his head.

"Are you alright?" she was getting slightly worried for the poor man's sanity.

"Alright? Of course I'm alright. I've just been forced to forsake everything I held to be true about vampires and what-not, but other than that psychological blow, I'm bloody fine!" the mercenary had obviously had his head screwed with by Alucard. To what extent, Integra was afraid to know. "What did I do to get myself into this situation? I'm working with a vampire!"

"Two vampires," Integra held up two fingers. "You'll be working with two." Pip's complexion grew pale.

"Two?" he croaked.

Integra nodded. "Yes, two. And I assume he explained about the difference in ghouls and freaks?"

"Yes," Pip scowled. "The freaks are vampires, the ghouls are zombies. He pointed that out to me..."

"Excellent. Well, that covers about everything. I'm glad to have you working with us, Mr. Bernadotte. If you have any questions, feel free to ask them," Integra explained.

"Am I going to die?" he groaned.

"Not likely, unless you do something very stupid," she comforted him. There was a knock at the door, and Walter walked int othe room, followed by H and Seras. "Ah, is everything in order?"

"Yes, Sir Hellsing," Walter bowed. "Everything is prepared."

"Excellent. Mr. Bernadotte, meet your fellow operatives, Seras Victoria and H," Integra gestured towards the two soldiers.

"H? What kind of name is that? I mean, really... wh-" Pip was interupted by H.

"I'm sorry, but I didn't comment on your name, Mr. Burnt-Toast. So back off..." H had finally lost patience with people questioning his name. Pip chuckled at the remark.

"I seem to have struck a nerve. I'm sorry..." Pip smirked. "And greetings, Miss Victoria."

"Hello," she waved.

"By the way, she's the other vampire," Integra suddenly informed Pip, causing him to turn pale and take a few slow steps backwards.

"Oh relax, I won't bite," Seras grinned, revealing her fangs. Pip let out a small whimper.

"My gosh, what did Alucard do to the poor guy?" H asked Integra.

"I honestly have no idea, and I am afraid to ask," she replied. "So, are you both ready for your mission?"

"What about Alucard?" H looked around the room. "Isn't he coming?"

"No, he is to remain on stand-by. It's only a small scale outbreak, so you two should be able to handle it, I trust. You are to be dropped down in the center of the town via helicopter. Seras is to take up a sniping position atop the town hall, and you are to hunt down the vampire responsible for the killings," Walter explained their entire mission to them.

"Helicopter? Isn't that a bit obvious?" H asked.

"The police helicopter that circled the town earlier reported several burning buildings and a gathering of people in the town's center. Judging from this information, it is assumed that there are no human survivors," Walter replied. "This is a classic vampire tactic. Kill the population, gather a ghoul army, and then conquer the next town. You are to make sure he does not follow through with the last part of the plan."

"Alright. When do we leave?" H checked his watch.

"Right now," Integra told him. "You already placed your weapons in the vehicles, I assume?"

"Yes, Sir Hellsing," Seras ansered.

"Excellent. Good luck, and good bye," Integra bid them farewell as Walter led them out of the room. After a few seconds, she turned her attention back to Pip. "Are you alright?"

The pale mercenary turned to face her, his face gaunt with terror. "No. I'm bloody terrified of you people..." he answered weakly.

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Aw, poor Pip. He had a bad day... hahahah. Well, next time we'll get to see how well H does in combat. Lets hope he doesn't get cut up in the crossfire. Heh heh...