A/N: Okay, lot's of reviews equals headache for me.
Evangelion's In Gainax Possession, All's Right With The World
Italics: Thoughts/Yui
Bold: Sound
One last thing, I found a script, but it's direct translation. So more of the plot won't be completely made up and I'll stop using it if this chapter sucks. Sorry for any incorrect usage of japanese.
The crews of NERV are still on clean up detail after the gruesome battle: hazmat suits as far as the eyes can see, giant slabs of burning angel flesh hanging off of antennas, a sewer system blocked and filled with blood, bones and guts, and multiple workers heaving the contents of their stomachs to add to the mess.
"Oh God, make it stop," random worker 66 collapsed, ripped his mask off, and multi-colored yawned over the street corner he had just cleaned.
"Here you go," a distorted voice caught his attention. Turning around, 66 saw the supervisor with a little duct tape covered box in his hands and on his gas mask. "Attach the box to the input hose and get back to work."
Worker 66 quickly attached the box and shoved the mask back on his face. The smell was gone! After 2 hours on duty, he ran up to his supervisor, sobbed his thank you while bowing down to him like a religious idol, and started back towards his little corner of Tokyo-3.
'I wish they'd stop that...' Mr. Supervisor took out another box and headed to the next collapsed worker.
"This second coming of angels is too...It's too abrupt," Seele 01, AKA Keel or Robo-bastard spoke out at the dimly lit conference.
"It's just like 16 (everything's a year later, my story) years ago. They struck without warning." Seele 03 (?) commented.
"This may be a good thing. What happened then bore no fruit for us." Seele 05 leaned back.
"Be cautious, it's too early to tell if this is wasteful or not." Seele 07.
"Exactly, NERV must protect the information behind the new anti-angel measures for this to work. Which seems almost impossible considering how it was stopped" Seele 03 sweat dropped.
"The matter has been taken care of. Don't worry." Non-robo-bastard assured the committee.
"Well, that's has been addressed." Keel stated, inclining he wanted to move on.
"...but Ikari, NERV and Eva...they could be better used, right?" Seele 02.
"The costs to repair Unit 00, and the damage to Unit 01..." Seele 04 started to say.
Snort "hehe...I'm sorry, but what damage? You saw the footage." Seele 03 interrupted and a few snickers could be heard.
"continuing what I was saying. Your practices would bankrupt most countries." Seele 04.
"I heard you gave that..." he was going to say toy, but thought better of it, "equipment to your son." Seele 06.
"Lives, time, and money... How much will be spent by you and your son before you are satisfied?" Seele 07.
"Besides, you have another job to do, don't you?" Seele 04.
A folder lay in front of Gendo.
TOP SECRET
HUMAN COMPLEMENT PROJECT
TOP-LEVEL EXECUTIVE COUNCIL
17TH INTERIM REPORT
HUMAN COMPLEMENT COMMITTEE
PROJECT OUTLINES FOR FISCAL 2016
SUMMARY
"The Human Complement Project--that is what you must give the highest priority." Seele 04.
"That's right. That project is our only hope in such hopeless circumstances." Seele 03.
"Anyway, even though Angels have come again, that project must not fall behind schedule. As for the budgets, we'll consider them." Keel.
"Well, the committee will take over now." Seele 06. The rest of the members disappeared, leaving Bastard vs. Robo-Bastard.
"Ikari, you can't go back now." Keel commanded.
"I understand. Humanity has no more time." and Gendo left believing his scenario would go on as planned. Thank goodness he purposely ignores the other carrier of his manipulative genes. Gendo would need to rethink everything in a couple of months, but for now he had to make a phone call to check on Rei.
While Gendo was defending himself against his masters, Misato was at ground zero. She was overseeing the cover-up, wearing a gas mask and fanning herself to repel the heat. Without the stench of angel death to distract them, several people were also complaining about the weather.
"Misato, come on. We can debate this like normal on the way back to NERV." Ritsuko boarded the mobile test vehicle.
"Hold up!" Misato jogged up to the van and climbed in, completely missing the scene to her left. Half the workers on break were bowing down to a roll of duct tape and making solemn prayers to their savior.
"Ah, air conditioning, but I don't even want to take this mask off until were 50 ft underground." 'I really need a beer...'
"Don't worry, unless you touched a sample, the smell doesn't linger. It's fascinating really."
"Yeah, it finally looks like everybody's starting to move and work together on this," they passed a weapon cache in construction "we should be to win if Eva and the city work together." Misato looked at her friend, sparking the debate.
"Aren't you being a little optimistic?" Ritsuko asked. "An unknown amount of adaptive angels bent on killing us all and limited resources on our part." ' Advantage: Angels'
"Come on. It's not even wishful thinking. Did you not even see Unit 01's battle?" Misato responded in a little bit of disgust and malicious smile. 'Revenge is gooood.'
"Damn it. How am supposed to beat that?" 'I haven't lost one of these in years.'
"Ha! You owe me later. See you." Misato smirked. 'Yes! Free beer for me!'
Prior to all this, around 9 o' clock...
'99...100 percent ...image dispersed. Reactivating Ikari Shinji, version 2.0...Updating system hardware... modifications found ... Libido: Yui's Guide for Beginners...nasal buffers included ...Reboot complete.' (A/N: sorry, couldn't help myself)
'That was awesome!' was Shinji's first conscious thought, then his eyes flashed open and body went rigid, 'MOM!'
Calming himself down, he noticed where he was. 'Yep, still 121 ceiling tiles. I thought I could at least get out of this, but then Misato wouldn't pick me up in...' Looks at clock on wall, '6 hours!'
With a sigh, Shinji pressed on the call nurse button and a cute brunette walked in a minute later. "You're awake! That's great, let me get the doctors just to make sure you're feeling fine."
'Yay! Two hours of tests and I'll get lunch. The good news is I didn't pass out from pain this time. Why can't I remember what happened? Oh right...I'll somehow recall it when I try to go to sleep tonight.'
Shinji didn't get much more time to ponder as the doctors swarmed in and performed hell knows how many tests. He took it pretty well since he was used to it by now, there was always a simple pattern in answering.
"Yes...no...no...okay...yes..." He raised his limbs and moved his body in the specified directions before going on to another list of questions. The whole process only took an hour and a half due to Shinji's cooperation and nudging towards the correct questions.
'Finally...thank God.' "Excuse me miss..."
"Sadamoto." the brunette was back.
Shinji smiled slightly, pretending to be a little shaken up, "do you think you could get me some paper and a pen?"
"Sure, I was about to leave and get your lunch anyways." Before she exited the room with a comforting smiling. A while later she came back and told Shinji to call if he needed anything.
'Time to get scheming.' He began to write after his not-so-bad meal. Hey, anything compared to Misato's cooking was good. Things to make sure happen in the upcoming weeks: 'I'm not going to plan to far ahead, but things should line up nicely' 1. Visit Rei 2. Misato becomes my guardian 3... And this list went on with various ideas until he got to the end. Make the bastard's life a living hell any and every way logically possible in all the points above. 'That's actually going to be difficult, how to do it without creating more work for Misato?'
Shinji tucked the stack of papers away into his bag as Sadamoto came back in. He was all ready to go.
"Mr. Ikari, everything turns out to be A-OK. You can leave whenever your ride gets here and try not to come back unless it's a visit," she said with a wink.
'Misato still has another hour...' "I'll try Sadamoto-san. Do you what room Ayanami, Rei is in?"
"Yes, she's relaxing in the ICU suites, first floor, room 150. I don't think she's up to any visitors."
"I just wanted to make sure she was okay, I'm sure Comander Ikari, my father, would like to know." 'Must...use...restraint...in...manipulations. I don't want to end up like him, God forbid it.'
Nonetheless, it had the desired effect and the nurse informed the guard Rei would have a visitor. 'She has a guard? Sure, put her in a crappy apartment, but give her the best room in the hospital.'
Rei was lying there, listlessly staring at the ceiling. The only signs of life were her gentle breathing movement, the occasional blinks that covered her red eyes, and the beeps of the heart monitor. She heard the door slide open and turned her head slightly.
'Pilot Ikari is here.' And she returned to her ceiling gazing. 'I recall him debating with the commander and Evangelion Unit 01 prevented our deaths.'
"Hello Ayanami-san. How are you feeling?" Shinji assumed the bastard position and placed his hands in front of him, mirroring his father. Maybe it would bring Rei out a little more.
"I'm acceptable." 'Why is he here?'
'I had forgotten how restrained she is...it's kind of annoying and refreshing compared to Asuka and Misato. Apparently she didn't inherit mom's personality.' "I just wanted to make sure you were feeling well, you were bleeding severely, right?"
"Correct."
"Well I hope you recover soon. We have school together and I'd like to see you there. Are the other students nice?"
Rei took a split second longer to answer the question, "They are acceptable."
"That's nice. Tell me about your friends."
"I do not consider anyone my friend."
"What? Surely you have one friend? Why wouldn't you?"
"It is not necessary."
'Jackpot!' "Many things are not necessary Ayanami-san, but people do them anyways. If people only did what was necessary, they'd die. Because people have and do things they want, they feel the need to live."
"...what is your purpose here Pilot Ikari?"
'Shit. Maybe I tried this too soon...I'll just fight misunderstanding with misunderstanding' "I am in Tokyo-3 to pilot Evangelion Unit 01 and fight so long as I get paid and protect the world. If I don't, then what would happen? I need the world to exist if I want to live, but it's good to get paid so I can enjoy the present more...oh, you meant with you. Forget that then, I just wanted to see how you were doing and see if you could tell me anything about my new school."
"I see..."
"Sorry Ayanami-san, but I have to wait for Misato to pick me up. I will see you later."
'Well that could've gone better. I really hope Rei can't read minds.' Shinji wandered his way into the waiting room and pulled out his iPod and SDAT. 'half an hour left. At least I found out there were more than two tracks on my old SDAT. Stupid rewind button, I could never get it to go past Track 25.'
"Hey Shinji-kun, let's go get your housing arrangements." Misato pushed the elevator button.
'Yay, I hope he holds his words,' the doors open and Gendo was waiting inside. 'Sigh...it's bastard time.' "I trust you remember our agreement father."
"..." 'A verbal agreement constitutes nothing, he will accept the position and...'
"Katsuragi's pay...Katsuragi's pay...Katsuragi's pay..." Shinji was holding his iPod up and playing his new favorite track over and over. This had the same effect on the rest of the compartment's passengers: annoyance.
'It's so unfair, Shinji-kun's been here one day and is making the same as me.'
'I was unaware he had a recording device.'
'Thank you Misato!' "I trust you will take care of it, I have sent a copy (remember the waiting room) to payroll and I expect my payment by Friday. I expect my regular wages to be in cash as well" And Shinji left the elevator before getting a response. 'He won't comply...'
"Sorry about that Misato-san, I can't imagine the crap you've put up with working for him. I don't know how much you make, I thought Ritsuko made less so I chose her to start with. I would have piloted it like normal if it was anyone but my father."
'So he doesn't like his father...I can relate, but I bet he won't regret it.'
Shinji and Misato stand before a man at the model of Nerv.
DISTRICT F, GEO-FRONT, TOKYO-3 RESIDENT'S CARD
6-24, DISTRICT F, GEO-FRONT, TOKYO-3
1: Ikari Shinji 0001-137-2
"He's going to be living alone?"
"Yep, his room is located there in Block 6. It's close to his school and the 37th entrance, is that okay?" random man asked.
"I guess..." 'Come on...'
"You don't sound to happy with it huh, Shinji-kun?
"I don't have any other choice Misato," with a puppy dog face as he turned around. Misato started to ask the man several questions and Shinji's face lit up. 'Yay!'
"WHAT DID YOU SAY? I TOLD YOU LAY OFF THAT STUFF AFTER COLLEGE!"
"I told you, I'm going to be Shinji's guardian. I've done all the paper work and got permission. It's not like I'll have an affair with the kid. Besides, you heard him: He cooks, cleans, and it's always good to have a second income."
"Yes...'' 'How come it sounds like she thought this through?' "maybe I should petition for custody?"
"Sorry Rits-chan, you don't spend enough time at home. Always better to be an alcoholic than a workaholic! Call you later." Click. Misato ran off to find Shinji.
"Damn. Have to get to Unit 00 and run some more tests."
A short while later we see Misato driving her mass of duct tape through a tunnel, not paying attention to the road and talking to Shinji. Shinji was in a great mood knowing that he'd be returning home and having a second chance at it.
"Thanks again Misato," rubbing his head after calling her Katsuragi-san by mistake.
"Well, we'll be having a wild time tonight, right?" She winked.
'I wish...bad Shinji!... Hey she did say we do the next part after I came back...Baka she doesn't know that, she means a party...damn, but just to make sure,' "What are you talking about?"
"There's a welcoming part for new roommates! What did you think?" Insert lecherous grin.
"Nothing!" 'Evil idea...' "Roommates? We have another roommate? Who is she?"
"He's not a she."
"Eww, I don't want to share an apartment with your boyfriend there."
"Baka, he's not my boyfriend. You'll understand later." Misato simply responded, it took a lot more for her to become embarrassed. The car stopped instantly, flinging Shinji into the seatbelt. "Come on, we need supplies."
Said supplies consisted of every type of instant food and beer. "Let me at least grab some stuff for tomorrow."
"We have enough Shinji-kun."
"I'll pay you back with interest."
"Okay, we'll work something out." As Shinji added some fresh (edible) food to the basket. In the background two women were talking about moving as Misato checked out and they left.
"Let's make a little detour, I want to show you something."
"Sure, what is it?" 'Damn, I forgot how often she does that.' Shinji was feeling the ill effects of being a teenager and having a hot guardian who incessantly teased you.
giggle "It's... a... good... place." 'I have a feeling I'll enjoy living with Shinji.'
'Arghh! Maybe I should've taken the other apartment.'
The car stopped at the top of a hill, overlooking the sunset, and Misato motioned for Shinji to join her to look at the city. Silence hung throughout the air before the alarm rang out. The buildings were extending from the ground, resembling a sped up film up a plant growing.
'Why bother to put the buildings up now before night...oh, Misato must have known they were down for the Angel attack and clean-up and if they did it in the morning, they'd wake people up.' "That is so cool," Shinji honestly spoke out.
"I'd like to welcome you to Tokyo-3, the town you protected and the fortress against all incoming angels. Time to show you to your new home."
Boxes outside the door held the rest of Shinji's belongings and there was a sloppily hung nameplate reading 'Katsuragi'. She opened the door and Shinji simply stared. Boxes were shoved aside and garbage lay to the sides of paths made in between refrigerator, bedroom, and bathroom.
'Is this worse than before? ...I knew it, that box did have a 'biohazard' label!'
"Heh, you can see I just move in myself."
"Obviously...well. Tadaima!" 'It's better than nothing.'
"Okaerinasai!" (Welcome home) "Let me show you around. I know it's a little bit messy"
"..." 'And Gendo's only a little bit bastard...'
"And that's it! Great, huh?"
"Yea, it is actually, somehow..." Shinji trailed off. He couldn't stop smiling.
"Could you put the groceries away? I'm going to change."
"Okay." 'Where's PenPen?'
A microwave spree, a little water, some salt, a few vegetables, and some rice balls later Shinji somehow transformed Misato's choice in food into a half decent meal. The only explanation can be a prior year's worth of survival experience...that and an extreme determination not to look down Misato's tank top made him entirely focused on the meal.
Misato had currently take residence, sitting backwards on the chair, leaning forward while drooling slightly at the smell of culinary ability.
'Oh man, if she leans forward anymore I'm going to get a free show...damn libido. Misato isn't used to living with me yet.' "Misato, you're kinda distracting me...just give me a minute."
"Okay Shin-chan." 'I've still got it, but Shinji's no fun. This would be hilarious if he was extremely introverted.'
"Done. Here you go."
Simultaneous "Itadakimasu!" 's were said and both dug in. Misato much faster seeing how she grabbed a Yebisu and slammed it down.
"AH! That's the good stuff! I see your enjoying yourself."
"Yea, I used to do this every so often with my last guardian. I've actually missed it a little bit."
"Ne?"
"I don't mind cooking that much, especially for peoplewho appreciate it. What's next? Don't tell me your party for new roommates consists of instant food and cleaning the landfill up."
"Hey, it's not that bad and no, you forgot moving the boxes in and unpacking," Misato smiled and hammered the next beer down with no mercy.
"Great."
'Well that was awful,' they had shoved the mess mostly into Asuka's past room and Shinji left the boxes to unpack for later, 'I guess she rubbed off a little on me last time.' Overall, the apartment was a little messier than he was used to, 'I wonder if I should stop Asuka from coming...'
"Stop staring into space, it's time to divide up the daily duties. Let's play Janken!" 'Hehe...I'm not a tactical expert for nothing.' Misato rarely lost in Janken after the first couple of games because she seemed to shoot almost late and tell what her opponent was throwing before hand...or she's just lucky.
"Let's not. I suck at it," clearly remembering last time he lost a month's laundry duty to Misato. "I'll flip a coin and you call it in the air..."
"No, let's play Janken, pleeeease!" Misato responded with a clearly fake, but effective, sad face.
"Err...just for breakfast and dinner, ok?" 'Crap. Backbone, why did you break on me? sigh At least I know I'm going to end up cooking everything anyways and now she'll probably push for more,' Shinji thought as he quickly assumed the bastard position.
'I guess that's okay, I'd push for everything, but I get the weird feeling I don't want to piss him off,' "Deal."
'Whoah, it worked. I bet if I got sunglasses I could force the people at NERV to mindlessly obey me,'
Elsewhere, Gendo Ikari sneezed in the middle of his trip to Unit 00. No one said 'bless you' or even breathed as they tried to avoid the area as soon as possible. Who knows what disease he could have? There had to be some logical reason a single person would be so bastardy.
OUR EVERYDAY DUTIES TABLE
(To-Do/a day of the week) (Sun)(Mon)(Tue)(Wed)(Thurs)(Fri)(Sat)
(Breakfast) (Shi)(Shi)(Shi)(Shi)(Shi)(Shi)(Shi)
(Dinner) (Shi)(Shi)(Shi)(Shi)(Shi)(Shi)(Shi)
(Garbage) (Shi)(Mi)(Shi)(Mi)(Shi)(Mi)(Mi)
(Bath Cleaning) (Mi)(Shi)(Mi)(Shi)(Mi)(Shi)(Shi)
"You were unlucky, Shinji-kun. Now that that has been fairly taken care of, everything's ok."
'I know you cheat, somehow. No one's that good at Janken.' then it hit him 'Grrrr, she lost on purpose the first time we did this!'
"How did you do that?"
"Do what?"
"You know, cream me in Janken?"
"Very simply... It's... a... secret!" Misato giggled as she hung up the chart.
"Grrrrr. I'm going to take a bath. It's your day to take the garbage out. Ja!" Leaving Misato behind with the heap of garbage bags.
"Hey! Heh, and here I thought he'd be another Rei. I hope PenPen isn't in one of these," as she picked up two of the many bags and headed out.
In the testing bay of Unit 00, Ritsuko and Gendo were talking. Two of the walls were partially destroyed and bakelite encased a Unit 00 in mid punch.
"How is Rei doing?"
"She will be able to move in ten days. I will get the committee's permission to unfreeze Unit 00 then." Gendo was significantly colder than normal, maybe it had something to do with having to stop all inter-office mail to get the third child's letter to payroll. He would arrange it tomorrow in his own fashion and then lock the wages.
"They have to deal with so much..."
"There are no other people who can use Eva so, for as long as they live, I will let them do that." It was amazing the double-speak Gendo used sub-conciously.
"Whatever what the children want...right?" 'Of course not, look who I'm talking to. He doesn't give a shit what they think.'
"Ahh, this is heaven." Shinji struggled to stay awake. In his mind, he had not had a proper bath since pre-third impact and had not enjoyed one for even longer. Unpleasant things used to come to mind when Shinji tried to relax, but he could simply say "it won't happen" or wonder why it had bothered him in the first place.
One moment his eyes were open, then he slipped beneath the surface, and the next he saw PenPen floating on top of the water. "AHH!" 'well, that woke me up. I'm turning into a prune.'
Shinji wrapped up in a towl and carried PenPen to the living room where Misato was waiting. "So this is our other roommate?"
"Yep. PenPen meet Shinji. Shinji meet PenPen. He's a hot-water penguin"
"Hey..."
"Wark..."
"What?..."
"War war-kk." By now Misato was watching the two of them with interest.
"You understand what he's saying?"
"Hell no! I've haven't learned how to speak penguin. Ow! That hurt!"
'Stupid human. Just wanted you to make tuna for breakfast.'
"If I make you tuna for breakfast will it make you happy?"
"WARK!" PenPen smiley-eyed at Shinji and headed for his fridge.
"Looks like you have a gift with animals, usually takes me twice as long to figure out what he wants."
'I know... eventually he just stops coming to you for food.' "I guess so. I'm turning in after I unpack, night!"
On to Misato in the bath talking to Ritsuko on the phone.
"So how's everything going with Shinji?"
"Pretty good. I don't have to cook ever and he doesn't mind. I'm still a little afraid, but we've hit it off pretty well."
"Developing a crush are we?"
"Be serious, he's a little young for me. I just meant he seems to fit right in, even PenPen approves."
On the other end Ritsuko's eyes widened. It had taken her three packages of salmon and designing his fridge to get PenPen to accept her. "Guess you got lucky, well I have to go. Make sure to bring Shinji in for his physical and tests. Ja Matta"
"Ja ne." sigh "I feel guilty about using him like this."
Shinji had finished unpacking the rest of his things and was hiding his scenario in the ceiling in his closet. 'So much depends on the later angels and it will all be worthless if my father doesn't get any migraines.'
"Hey Shinji-kun." Misato was outside his door hanging up a little plack she'd forgotten about.
"Come in." Shinji sat down on his blankets.
"Hey...I just wanted to see how everything was going?"
"Suprisingly well."
Shinji looked up and saw the disbelief on her face.
"Things could always be worse Misato. I could've died, I could be living by myself 'or the bastard...barf' and I could have all the chores to do. Don't worry about that. Consider it a thanks for all you've done and I'll make the payments on your car if you teach me how to drive. I live mostly for the present now, but I don't intend on letting you or anyone else ruin my future. I like living here so far and if something happens, it happens. I'm happy now."
'Ok, besides asking how he can read my mind, what should I do?' "It's just that...I don't really know how to be your gaurdian."
"There's always Ritsuko if you don't want me. Don't worry about it."
"Hey! Fine, alright. Remember you've done a good job kicking angel ass so far, so keep holding your head high. You start school next Monday at Tokyo-3 Junior High and tomorrow you have a physical and tests to perform. Good night, Shinji-kun."
"Right. Good night Misato!" he called after her as he turned off the lights.
'Well I should be flash backing any second' yawn 'now.' And our hero fell asleep...and began to have the most informative dream left by Yui.
"Amazing, the angel hasn't landed a blow yet and the sync ratio hasn't dropped." Maya read off the display.
"Wait! The pilot's brain activity is being over stressed somehow. Source unknown...Pilot is unconscious!" Makoto freaked out.
"Unit 01 is totally silent," Shigeru
"No, sync ratio has jumped to 200 and is holding steady. How's this possible?" Maya just stared before the answer came.
On screen, the Eva's eyes could be seen turning red and the mouth restraints snapped as it let out an unearthly roar. Translated into: "Your ass is mine! #$#$#!"
"Beserker..." Ritsuko stated, eyes in distress.
"We've won." Fuyutsuki in disbelief.
"Indeed." Bastard. Just simply Bastard.
Sachiel, being the intelligent creation it was, charged at full force, bent on destroying this abomination of Adam. Yui charged as well, screaming all the way, but stopped right before they met and did a bicycle kick backwards. Her foot move upwards as she coated it with a bladed AT field and it tore thru the pseudo-crouch of Sachiel, flinging it into the sky.
"OW!" Shigeru, Fuyutsuki, and Makoto in unison.
With a completely sadistic smile, Yui waited below Sachiel and upercutted into its torso and pulled hard. The complete structual system that resembled bones was ripped out thru its stomach and landed in Unit 01's teeth, where they were ground together and spit back on to the angel's mask. The now quadriplegic angel cried out in what one could only guess was pain as it cast an AT field toward Yui.
'Like that's gonna stop me you crybaby,' the Eva laughed out and tore apart the field.
The audience was already in awe and had stopped monitoring the equipment when Yui pulled out all the angel's bones and it literally rained blood.
'Time to end this and desecrate your body!'
Unit 01 ripped off and arm and rib-like object and started beating the crap out of Sachiel, blood was flying everywhere while it tried to regenerate. After a minute or so, Yui jumped up as far as the cable could reach and laid an AT axe kick straight through the core and the angel went silent. That was not enough.
"Cut the power. Now!" Gendo surprisingly yelled, snapping everyone out of their stupor as they complied.
"5 minutes left and counting..." Shigeru shakily stated.
"All signals are being refused, pilot status: unconscious and body functions are healthy."
"Oh my GOD!" Maya and Misato screamed at the same time.
Turns out to Yui, 5 minutes was plenty o' time to have some fun creating a mess. It wasn't like she got out very often and Sachiel's body was completely destroyed the first time, so she had to at least try.
Picking up the corpse, she used Unit 01's mouth to tear off chunks and created an awful slurry of flesh, organs, and who knows what. As time was running out, she feverishly used both arms enhanced with a white-hot AT field to massacre what was left. No mass with a volume bigger than a small car would be found in the morning. In her last seconds of freedom, Unit 01 stood up on an elevator and let off a massive roaring, recognizable laughter and an AT spike strait into space, destroying a Seele satellite. The light could be seen around the world.
Silence reined throughout Tokyo-3.
Ritsuko spoke warily, "Body recovery group, move."
Misato swallowed and shouted, "The pilot's protection is top priority!"
NERV started back up and Gendo could be seen closing his eyes, 'Seele is not going to like this,' before trudging up to his office to start on the report.
A/N: Way the hell too long, this took me at least 12 hours to write/research! How do other authors do this? Oh yeah, from now on: expect a chapter once or twice a week. I'm starting my next semester at college so wish me luck.