Author's Note: Here we are again. Hope everyone enjoys this new chapter.
A special thanks to those who reviewed: whoknoez, Royal blueKitsune, sulou, toxiclollipop, crazy fanfic lover, nebulia, Anonymous but very interested, MikaylaMae, skenshingumi, Anarana221, Lendra-chan, Reignashii, I Heart Edward Cullen, flaming-amber, unknown beedee, ixchen, Youkoforever, Threedaysunrise, Mizz-Clumsy, ola, and SilverNimbus.
Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.
A Soft Hope
Chapter 4
"Habituation"
The social voices of the content geese traveled through the air, creating a colorful mingle of delightful sounds that blended with the morning's clear beauty. Today, the sky was devoid of any obstructions and made only of a deeply crisp, omnipresent blue. The calm after the angry storm was wondrously revitalizing. The pond animals seemed to flourish in the clear, enriching air, their movements more animated and their interactions more playful.
Kaoru couldn't have asked for a more inspiring day. This was the day she had planned to weave the playful presence of the pond animals into the smooth backdrop of her painting.
Moving her intent gaze from the pond, she glanced to her left, narrowing her eyes on the reclining figure of the red-haired man. He had placed a hat over his face, shielding his closed eyes from the bursting brightness of the sun. His arms were back behind his head, helping him to stretch out comfortably on the ground.
Puffing out a breath, Kaoru sat back in her chair, her mind distracted from the painting. She shouldn't have been surprised when Kenshin had appeared miraculously by her side in the grass - his abrupt presence only revealed to her when she had looked up from the painting, her brow scrunched as she meant to get another look at her surroundings. Her heart had stuttered nervously as her fingers slipped on the paintbrush. Kenshin had uttered a muted hello before nonchalantly leaning back in the dewy grass and closing his eyes, taking the position he held now.
She could only guess he had had another long, sleepless night like the other day when he had spent the morning in the grass, supposedly drifting off into sleep. His presence was relatively unobtrusive to her as she painted.
Because he had been beside her as she had painted previously, Kaoru was beginning to become aquatinted with his presence, only sparing him a few cursory glances. The only sounds infiltrating her senses were that of the pond inhabitants' welcome of the day, and the soft, hushed sweep of the paintbrush across the canvas. Kaoru bit her lip, her concentration returning, and the time around her blurring into an unrecognizable whirl.
As the days passed, this ritual continued in a similar fashion. Kenshin was either present when she arrived, silently watching the play of rippling water in the pond, or he appeared in his singular quiet fashion, suddenly there and gracing her with his calming presence. It was only after his immediate arrival in the mornings that he studied the painting, his eyes perusing every stroke, every dash of color spread onto the canvas. He gave her suggestions that sometimes amused her, annoyed her, or piqued her interest. And a few of those times, she heeded his advice.
Kenshin slowly became a fixture, almost a necessity to her while she painted her English countryside. Kaoru nearly regretted his presence, for now when the time would come to return home, and she went back to her second-story room, which she considered residence to her paints, Kaoru would never feel quite the same about her art. His company created a haven of time that she viewed with quiet appreciation. This red-haired man…this former stranger…
…Kenshin…
…made her inwardly peaceful - a feat that she hadn't thought she would be able to accomplish in years, much less within the confines of a few weeks. And with his presence, the dark robe of blackness enveloping her mind had started to peel gently and slowly away, allowing a slim slip of pale light to warm her…to brighten her.
Pondering to herself, Kaoru wondered if anyone would have been able to softly break through her thick inner shield. Would Misao or a different person, maybe even another stranger have been able to awaken her thoughts with a careful silence as Kenshin had done so wonderfully? Anyone?
No.
No, they wouldn't have.
And though this baffled Kaoru, she accepted it. She accepted Kenshin's friendship. She accepted the light he offered to her - the freedom from the stifling depression that he represented. She accepted…him.
It was nearly a week and half later when she finished her current painting, brushing the final slip of paint onto it. It had taken her longer than she had originally anticipated, one particular part giving her an unmitigated amount of trouble. It was finally with Kenshin's suggestion of creating a dazzling ripple effect in the pond that she was able to finish. Despite completion, Kaoru made Kenshin believe she still had work to do, insuring his appearance the next day to be very probable.
So when she arrived at the pond with Alistair in tow and painting supplies bursting from her small bag, Kaoru felt a fleeting stab of disappointment when she noticed that he hadn't arrived yet. But, mentally comforting herself, she relented that his immediate absence wasn't out of the ordinary. Instead of setting up her supplies on top of the knoll where she had a nice view of the surroundings, she walked down near the shore of the pond.
The wind was weak this morning, managing only a small sliver of cool breeze, allowing the water of the pond to remain placidly quiet.
Kaoru unfolded the chair, sitting down onto the smooth surface and turning her gaze out, so she could admire the sweeping uniqueness of the vivid countryside. She lost herself in an endless twirl of thoughts, disconnecting her traveling mind from life's realism. She wasn't sure how long she sat there, her mind situated in the random wandering of her daydreams. She sighed heavily as, sometime later, her careful concentration slid slowly away, the haze of thought shifting as her vision locked on the blur of red appearing in her peripheral vision.
As she focused, Kaoru watched Kenshin's familiar form walk toward her. He strolled along the waterline, his chestnut horse visible behind him in the distance, tethered loosely to a towering tree. His violet eyes were focused on her, his hands tucked comfortably in the concealing folds of his pockets. He wore a curious expression on his face, his mouth forming a serious line, though Kaoru noticed the hinting of a small welcoming smile on the corner of his lips. The wind tousled his characteristically disheveled hair, the rich red strands pulled hastily into a long ponytail.
When Kenshin came within earshot, he furrowed his brow, his lips twisting with a quizzical frown. His voice carrying, he asked, "Where's your painting? How are you going to finish it if it's not here?"
She felt a secret smile curl her lips. "I already finished it."
His final steps took him slowly to her. Kenshin stopped in front of Kaoru, eyeing her with bemusement. "When?"
"Yesterday."
"And you didn't show me?" he replied, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning lightly back on his heels.
"I'll show you later," Kaoru promised. "But I wanted to make sure that you would come today. That's why I didn't tell you."
He frowned, shaking his head admonishingly. "All you have to do is ask…I'll come."
His words took her a little by surprise, causing her skin to flush a light pink across her cheekbones. "Oh."
Kenshin sighed, his eyes moving from her stationary form to the small bag filled with her painting supplies. "So what do you need?"
"I don't actually need anything."
He raised an eyebrow speculatively.
"I thought I'd give you a painting lesson."
Kenshin stood there for a moment, his face impassive and his mouth drawn into a straight line. Pulling his eyebrows together, he blinked at her smiling face, uncertain as to how to respond.
"But…but…I told you," he replied weakly. "I can't paint."
"Precisely."
"My mother tried to teach me. She gave up…my own mother. What do you intend to do?"
"You'll have to see."
He rubbed an absent hand on the back of his neck, stepping over to crouch down beside her sitting form. "Seriously, Miss Kaoru. I'm a hopeless cause."
Patting him reassuringly on the side of his arm, her fingers brushing the thin fabric of his lightweight shirt, she smiled happily. "Of course you aren't."
Bending over, she grabbed her bag, pulling two small canvases from it, handing one to him and keeping the other for herself. He held it awkwardly in his hands, lowering himself so he sat on the ground next to her chair. He turned surprised eyes to her as she got up from the chair, walked in front him and crossed to his other side, settling down on the grass beside him.
"Miss Kaoru don't sit there," he protested. "You'll get dirty. The chair's much better."
She took a calming breath, shooting him an annoyed glare as she arranged her skirts around her folded legs. "I'm perfectly fine."
"Are you sure I - "
"I'm sure," she cut in.
He sighed, reluctantly acquiescing, watching as she pulled paints from the bag and set them out. She placed various paints on the pallet, leaving a wide array of colors to choose from. Handing him a paintbrush, she nodded to herself, turning her now cheerful gaze to his.
"It's not really a painting lesson, I guess. Mostly it's just paint what you want."
"I don't know what I want."
Kaoru bit her lip to keep from smiling, amused by his belligerence. "Anything, Kenshin. Paint whatever comes to mind."
He stared at her for a moment before turning to gaze blankly at the empty canvas. As Kaoru dipped her paintbrush into the revealed paint, she began her simple rendition of a statuesque tree standing off in the distance - the one Kenshin's horse was tethered to. Narrowing her sapphire eyes, her attention was sucked into her art, but she was still aware of Kenshin's tense form, which remained a comforting presence at her side.
Kenshin watched her, his eyes following the line of her vision, catching sight of what she had decided to paint. He ran a frustrated hand over his forehead as he tried to come up with a subject. Sighing, he nodded weakly to himself before reaching over to swipe up a large glob of green from the pallet, dropping it on the center of the canvas. He smoothed it out with the paintbrush, forming an odd shape that had him grimacing.
The next five minutes were spent vainly trying to fix his mess until he finally glared at it for a moment, deciding reluctantly to move on and try to work around his mishap. Thirty minutes later, Kenshin was mentally exhausted with his artistic effort. He leaned back to get a new perspective of the first work of art he had crafted in many, many years.
Not bad.
Nodding, he decided he was pleased with the grueling effort.
Then he looked over at Kaoru's painting.
Okay, he admitted. So, his painting was pretty dismal. But, if you squinted you could almost make out what it was supposed to be…almost.
Kenshin frowned, setting down his paintbrush and crossing his arms across his chest, forgetting about the wet paint dotting his fingers. Catching Kaoru's attention, she looked up from her work.
She glanced from Kenshin's dissatisfied face, down to the painting sitting dejectedly in his lap. Her gaze scanned the large shape taking up most of the canvas, colored mostly with an odd mixture of green, yellow, and red. Trying to make out the shape, she tilted her head to side. Three jutting stalks of color sprouted from the base, lined incongruously with multiple colors that he had tried to blend and…well…failed.
"So what do you think it is?" he asked.
Kaoru looked up, her eyes swimming with mirth. "Um…," she started, pursing her lips in thought.
"I told you that I can't - "
"A leaf?"
At the slight narrowing of his violet gaze, Kaoru knew intuitively that she had guessed correctly. "Could be," he countered.
"It is, isn't it?" she replied triumphantly. He sat there a moment, apparently brooding to himself.
"Well, honestly, it could be anything," he conceded, glancing down at the canvas with a grimace. "But it did start out as a leaf."
Kaoru put her paintbrush down, reaching over to take Kenshin's painting from him. Holding it out in front of her at arm's length, she carefully studied his rendition of nature.
"Well, whatever you decide it is, you've made a wonderful effort."
Kaoru couldn't help but smile when she looked over and caught the unconvinced look on his features as he tried to view his work at the same angle as her.
"If you say so," he uttered dubiously. "I still think it looks pathetic."
Kaoru handed the small canvas back to Kenshin. He held it loosely in his fingertips. "Art doesn't have to be perfection. It just has to come from here," she replied, placing the palm of her left hand against his chest over his heart. His natural warmth bathed her hand, causing her fingers to tingle with awareness as the steady beat of his heartbeat was clearly felt. Letting his canvas slip from his grip, Kenshin placed one hand over hers, watching her closely as his fingers wrapped around her own. Their joined hands slipped down, settling between their sitting forms in the grass.
"Thank you for the advice," he responded, smiling softly at her.
With a short intake of shuddering breath, Kaoru nodded wordlessly in response, her legs moving beneath her as she started to stand. Her fingers fell from his as she stood, her black bangs falling into her gaze as she began to fumble for her supplies. Kenshin watched her rough movements calmly for a moment before rising to his feet to assist her.
"Heading back already?" he asked.
She flicked her gaze to his, catching it for a moment before looking away. She nodded again, her lips drawn. Kaoru turned her back to him, and behind her, she heard Kenshin shuffle around before his footsteps gradually disappeared.
A couple minutes later as she finished placing her supplies into the small bag and readying Alistair, Kaoru let her gaze wander as she turned, facing the direction in which Kenshin had departed just minutes previously. She was already half under the impression that he had headed off, returning home. But, Kaoru's eyes widened when she saw him standing there, the reins of his chestnut mare held loosely in his left hand. Kaoru noticed the amused flicker in his violet eyes as he watched her eyebrows rise in quiet speculation.
"I'm walking you home," Kenshin stated, standing firmly beside his horse.
"Walking me home?" she echoed, mildly surprised. "But, I'm fine."
Kenshin moved forward, leading his horse as he neared her stationary form. "I know," he conceded, "but both Lady and I could use the added exercise."
"Lady?"
Kenshin ran a comforting hand down his mare's neck, his eyes crinkling as he smiled. "My horse. She came to me already named, and I didn't have the heart to change it."
"She already responded to it?" Kaoru mused.
"Why, yes, she did."
Her own gaze drifted to her black stallion, her sapphire gaze softening. "It was the same with Alistair. He was a spirited yearling, and his name was the only way to get through that thick skull of his." As if sensing she was speaking about him, Alistair took a step forward, nudging her back roughly with his nose. She muffled a laugh, reaching behind her to place her calm hands on his forehead, underneath the coarse hair of his forelock. "He was a present to me…from my father."
Kenshin studied her, watching as her expression shifted slightly, her eyelids lowering to shade the churning emotion in her eyes. He didn't say anything, respecting the invisible shield of silence that Kaoru had erected around her slight form. It was easy to recognize such a barrier…for he held one around himself as well. Constantly.
When Kaoru turned back to face him, a tired smile covered her lips as she tried to bring back the former excited spark in her vision. "Shall we go?" she asked.
Nodding silently, he yielded to her quiet request, watching as she turned to mount Alistair. He restrained from assisting her, knowing that she preferred to complete the task on her own. Kaoru was confident in her movements, experience evident as she settled in the saddle. He watched as she urged her horse forward. Admiration rooting in his chest, Kenshin moved to Lady's side and slipped his foot into the stirrup and hefting himself up onto the saddle with a practiced ease.
He had to urge Lady into an accelerated walk to catch up to the already moving Alistair. Kaoru kept her back to him, her spine straight. Trustingly, Lady followed his quiet commands. When he had almost caught up to her, Kenshin caught slight of the change of Kaoru's body, the tensing of her shoulders and the shifting of her hands as she tightened her reins. Kaoru looked over her shoulder, her eyes spearing his as her mouth curved in a teasing grin. Kenshin felt his stomach clench, accurately reading the devious expression sliding over her features.
"I hope you like speed."
"Eh? Why?" he asked, plastering an ignorant look on his face.
Kaoru's response was a slight shrug as she turned her head away. She leaned forward, her lips moving as she whispered something to her horse. Kenshin felt his eyebrows rise with surprise as he watched Alistair bolt forward, Kaoru leaning low on his neck. Beneath him, Kenshin could feel Lady tense, her muscles heightened with anticipation as her ears flicked forward. With a small chuckle, he gave Lady a vocal signal, which in turn, she reacted to immediately by lowering her head and charging forward, her eyes intent on the other horse.
The speed wasn't new to Kenshin, though he hadn't let his spirit run free like this for years…a time that now felt like eternity. The light laughter of the young woman in front him resulted in a hitch of his breath, causing his hands to reflexively tighten on the reins, and his eyes to become threaded with a muted amber. The horses were well matched, their movements similar. It took Lady a couple minutes of long strides, heavy breathing and a determined mind to pull along side Alistair.
As their horses galloped over a small rise in the land, Kaoru slid her gaze from the quickly moving terrain beneath Alistair's hooves to meet Kenshin's probing violet eyes. Quickly she turned back as Alistair snorted, his head dipping down before rising immediately back up. His strides became more spirited as his trembling muscles dispelled exhilarated energy. Pulling back on the reins with the slightest of motions, she leaned back in the saddle. Alistair easily read her subtle body language, his pace slowing as he quieted into a canter. In response, Lady immediately followed, her hoof beats calming as she pulled in her own mounting enthusiasm, successfully banking her overflowing energy.
Air escaped from Kaoru in short breaths, her eyes sparkling with amused pleasure. Alistair finally slowed to a walk, and she turned to study the shadowed face of the redhead. Biting her lower lip, Kaoru mused that Kenshin had the distinct and overwhelming ability to cover the true extent of his emotions carefully, calculatingly, and coolly within his eyes…his expression remaining indifferent to the churning deliberation of his mind. Sometimes, though, she was able to catch a flicker of true thought…a piece of the man he sought to keep hidden within the murky depths of his inexplicable individuality.
Like now.
Kaoru could distinctly make out the flash of genuine amazement swirling in the amber streaked depths of his perceptive gaze, his lips softening into a smooth slip of pleasure as he watched her smile happily at him, her hair in a beautiful disaster of disarray.
Sucking in a deep breath, Kaoru uttered softly, "You're the first that's been able to keep up."
He broke their interlocked visual connection, his hand running comfortingly down Lady's slick neck. "She's the one that did most of the work. I was just along for the ride."
"It's a partnership," Kaoru disagreed, correcting him as she watched his gentle movements of appreciation toward his horse.
"Mmm."
"She wouldn't follow your directions to the extent that she does if she didn't trust you."
"True."
He looked out past them, his eyes scanning the sunlit horizon. "How far till we reach the estate?"
"Not much farther. We're actually already on the estate's property. We just have a little way more till we reach the stable." She sighed. "When we get up here," she said, pointing ahead of her, "You'll be able to see it."
His next question surprised her, catching her attention and drawing her eyes from the scenery before them. "When do you return to London?"
Kaoru brushed a loose slip of dark hair from her eyes, frowning and furrowing her brow in thought. "I've been in the country for nearly 3 and half weeks, so…I guess only one more week remains. But there has been some suggestion about the baron, Misao's father arriving, and possibly extending our stay." She glanced at him curiously. "Why?"
Kenshin gave her a blank stare before shrugging and smiling politely. "No reason. Just wondering."
They rode in silence for a while, the swaying sound of the saddles and the heavy steps of the horses filling the thick air. Kaoru ran her fingers across the leather of her reins, her mind attuned to the lone figure of the man riding beside her. It almost seemed as if they were the only two people in the area for miles. Their surroundings served as a quite buffer, wrapping their forms in a comforting, concealing blanket of solitude and isolate imaginings. Their movements were slow and lackadaisical, the wish to prolong the silent ride palpable in the cool morning air.
A heavy sigh built in Kaoru's throat as the estate slowly came into view as she crested the small hill, Kenshin close behind her. But as she moved to go down the incline, she heard Lady's hoof beats halt, her movements curtailed by Kenshin as he pulled back slightly on the reins. Turning her head, a quizzical slant to her eyes, she unconsciously frowned, seemingly unsure of how to respond to his sudden halting.
Finally, she managed to find some response to his actions. "Time for you to go back?"
He sighed heavily, giving a slight shrug of his shoulders. "Yes. I think it's safe to leave you here, in sight of the main estate."
"Safe, huh?" she replied, her tone wry. "What are you doing? Protecting me, I guess?"
A ghosting of a smile slipped over his lips. "In a way?"
"Who do you think I am? A defenseless woman?" she retorted, half-amused and half-riled with ire.
"No." He eyed her calmly, watching her stare at him for a moment, her eyes narrowing slightly. "It just makes me feel more secure, I guess."
Kaoru's retort seemed to catch in her throat with that comment, her face becoming slightly red as she held her breath unconsciously. Ducking his head, Kenshin shifted in his saddle, grabbing something and then dismounting. His steps were collected as he moved over to her, his head tilted upwards so he could catch her gaze with his own. He held the small canvas he had painted on earlier in his hand, his fingers loose on the artful rendering of a leaf.
Kenshin moved to hand his art to Kaoru, under the impression that she wanted to have the canvas back. Looking at him, surprised, Kaoru shook her head, motioning for him to pull the canvas back.
"No, no. You're supposed to keep it. I'm not taking it from you." Kaoru smiled reassuringly when he gave her a blank stare. "It's your painting, now. I couldn't take it from you."
He sighed in response, lowering the painting he held in his hand to his side as he gazed curiously up at her. She raised an eyebrow, holding Alistair's reins in her hands and running her fingers over the smooth leather.
"You aren't going to surprise me with more painting tomorrow, are you?" he asked.
She hesitated a moment, before smiling apologetically. "I can't come tomorrow morning. Or the days after. I've had to set aside that time for my hosts. They have plans that I need to follow, unfortunately."
Taking her announcement in stride, Kenshin nodded slowly. "Understandable. I know how that goes." He tipped his head down, showing her a great deal of respect. Kaoru's eyes warmed, deepening into a navy blue. "I will see you later, Miss Kaoru. It has been a pleasure."
His fingertips gripped the top of his painting a little tightly and his gaze followed her movements carefully as she shifted in Alistair's saddle, readying herself to urge her horse forward again.
"I feel the same. Take care, Kenshin."
The next few days drew on slowly, caught by a force that seemed to hold back the minutes cruelly, causing them to tick by at a maddeningly extended pace. The obligations that Kaoru was restrained by were mundane to say the least, but she remained with Misao and her mother, because if not for them she wouldn't even be here. She managed to hide the rooting discontent quite valiantly, she thought to herself smugly. Only Misao noticed to slight sluggishness to Kaoru's movements, catching sometimes when Kaoru glanced out the window, her friend's thoughts clouded with imaginings that she knew annoyingly nothing about.
They had received word yesterday afternoon that Misao's father would be arriving within the next couple of days, depending on weather and traveling conditions. Kaoru viewed his arrival with mixed feelings, knowing that now they would be expected to partake in the small amount of dinner parties and events that had mostly ignored until now, but…the trip would also be extended.
And that gave her more time to…
More time to…
'More time to do exactly what?' Kaoru thought moodily, staring out the window of her bedroom, her arms crossed over her chest, bunching the nightgown underneath. The routine dullness of the past days had started to grate on her nerves. With her creativity back, painting was starting to root into her mind as almost an obsession once more, causing her to become irritated with her lack of progress.
Progress?
What was she thinking?
She needed to be actually working on something to make progress. Here she stood, wasting away precious time that could spent on a new canvas, a new rendering of nature, more time to spend with Kenshin…
That last thought came out of nowhere, causing her to jerk with surprise, her eyes widening as she moved her gaze from the revealing view of the window, drifting to the side, halting on the painting she had finished days before. It was starting to feel as if an eternity had ticked by since the completion of that piece. And with the way she was going, she'd be an old woman before she began another one.
Sighing heavily, Kaoru stepped away from the window, moving over to her bed and plopping down heavily on the edge, letting her hands to fall in her lap. She needed to talk to Misao again about allotting herself some time where she could wander off and loose herself in the rippling world of her painting again. Kaoru honestly didn't care when that time would be…morning, noon, night…she just wanted something to call her own again.
A muted knock on the door drew her abruptly out of her reverie, catching her attention. Without a verbal reply, the door opened slightly, allowing a familiar head to pop in.
Misao eyed her from the doorway with a cheerful smile. "Oh, good. You're awake." She pushed the door open fully, gliding into the room with a refreshing aura of alertness. She closed the door behind her with a loud thump and moved across the room, coming to a small stop beside Kaoru's sitting form. With a sigh, Misao sat down next to her, settling the package she carried with her in her lap.
"You're up slightly early," Kaoru said, eyeing her friend with a mixture of curiosity and trepidation.
"If father arrives I -"
"This early?" Kaoru interrupted.
Misao fixed her with a pointed stare. "If father arrives I wanted to be awake."
"Uh-huh," Kaoru replied speculatively. "Would anyone else be happening to stop by?"
"Unfortunately, no. However, Mother has arranged for us to have brunch with our neighbors."
"When are we leaving?"
"In an hour or so. I came in to tell you to start getting ready," she replied, observing Kaoru as if trying to read her thoughts. "You look little pale. Are you alright?"
"Must be my lack of sun."
"Ah, now I see. You're still sulking about your lost painting time."
Kaoru didn't respond, choosing to not rise to Misao's carefully dangled bait. Misao eyed her for a moment, a knowing smile curved on her lips. Sighing, she grabbed the packet in her lap, thrusting it into Kaoru hands before standing up and brushing nonexistent dust from her folds of her dress.
"What's this?" Kaoru asked, making a quick grab at the parcel to keep it from tumbling to the ground.
"It arrived this morning for you. I haven't opened it, so I couldn't possibly tell you what it is," Misao replied with a teasing smile as she moved to the door of Kaoru's bedroom.
"Who brought it?" Kaoru asked, eyeing the package inquiringly, her eyebrows drawn together in question.
"A young boy. He brought it to the servant's entrance and handed it off to Polly, who then gave it to me. Now quit interrogating me and get dressed. Be downstairs as soon as you can. Mother actually wants to be on time today."
Kaoru watched as her friend opened the door, disappeared and closed it behind her. Turning her gaze back to the parcel she held in her hands, she wondered who on earth could be sending her something? Flipping over the package, she noticed her name scrawled over the brown paper on a loose, almost meticulous handwriting. Standing up mechanically, she moved over to the small table underneath one of the large windows in her room, and pulled out a chair to sit down in. Settling into the chair, she placed the package onto the table carefully, removing her hands and staring at the anomalous object. Brushing a stray wisp of hair from her face, Kaoru sighed, leaning back in the chair and tapping her fingertips against the top of the table.
If she hadn't been under time constraints, Kaoru felt she could have stared at it for the entire day, living on the reed of excitement that was growing in her chest, and filling her with a form of anticipation she hadn't felt in a long time. Receiving a letter had always been exciting, wondering what hidden words were held on the fragile paper, meant solely for her eyes. It was rare when she received an actual package. In fact she hadn't been on the receiving end of such a thing since…well, since her life had changed. She felt the overwhelming need to savor such a present…cherish it and never open it to reveal what unknown contents it held within. But there was another feeling rooted in her mind - one as strong as the need to stow it away and keep it unopened forever.
And that was the desire to rip the concealing brown paper to shreds and unveil the parcel's contents. Smiling to herself, Kaoru shook her head, amused by her own thoughts. And as she sat there, she decided her plan of action. She wouldn't let it sit there forever and remain a mystery, but she wouldn't tear the silly thing to shreds either, and risk damaging what was inside.
Biting the inside of her cheek, Kaoru reached out her hands, laying them on the outside of the package. Slipping her fingertips underneath an exposed flap of material, she pulled slightly, ripping the material away. It didn't take her long to rid the package its concealment. Staring down at what she was left with, Kaoru felt her heart speed up, and her fingers tremble with an overwhelmed surprise.
Sliding her fingers underneath the small painting, she lifted it, letting her eyes rove the haphazard, uncontrolled, casual rendering before her. Painstaking care had been applied, though amateur talent was apparent beneath the small and large arched strokes and the incomplete blending of color.
A note fluttered onto the table, catching Kaoru's swimming gaze. Lowering the canvas, Kaoru picked up the simple note, her eyes quickly running over the scrawled words.
Since I was forced to keep my first painting, I decided to make another. This one as a gift for you. Thank you, Kaoru.
Sincerely,
Kenshin
Turning her clouded vision to the small painting before her, a surprised laugh filled her, escaping between smiling lips. This one wasn't much better than the first, but…but…he had actually gone out and bought the stuff to make it, and then he…then he…
Running her fingers over the uneven texture of the paint, Kaoru cocked her head to the side, letting out an uneven breath. He really was an anomaly this Kenshin.
She was distracted by that painting the rest of the day, her mind constantly returning to the thoughtful scrawl of his paint strokes, and the painstaking care that had been taken to rendering a passable piece of art. Throughout their brunch with the neighbors, Misao had had to nudge her under the table to keep her in tune with the conversation so not to appear as if she was ignoring them. It was ridiculous how her attention kept wandering, leaving her unmindful to the present.
On the way back to the estate, Misao had questioned her inattention, sparks of interest blinding her. It was unusual for Kaoru to keep things from her best friend, but in this instance, Kaoru almost felt that if she told Misao about Kenshin, the relationship would become jinxed, and unravel into a sloppy mess of distraction and misinterpretation.
In fact, Kaoru wasn't even sure how to view their relationship herself, lost in the limbo of uncertainties and hesitation. All that she knew was that he was interesting to around, and different from any other person that she was acquainted with.
He was Kenshin. Just plain Kenshin.
The day drew on in the pace that seemed to dominate her life these days…slow, boring and uneventful. In the late afternoon, Kaoru wandered from the house into the gardens, moving almost instinctually to the white gazebo crowned with numerous flowers of a vast number of colors. This break in the mundane tune of her life these past few days was a welcome distraction to everything that seemed to be inadvertently taking over her freedom.
In the next couple days, the gazebo became an easy place for escape - one where she was able to slip quietly from the house and sit amongst the surrounding tranquility of the pretty garden circling the manor. Kaoru found that though it wasn't nearly as stimulating as her previous morning outings, these stolen moments were better than nothing.
Misao's now present father was slowly becoming once more acquainted with the countryside. His wish was to acclimate himself to the different surroundings before joining in any nearby festivities. Kaoru was glad of the social quiet, but she wished her daily interactions with nature could be more in depth once again.
This afternoon was pleasantly warm and sedate in its relative inactivity. A slight breeze threaded through the air, lightly brushing Kaoru's loosely bound hair. She sat stationary in the gazebo, her hands folded in her lap as she worried her lower lip between her teeth. A quaint pink blossom had captured her attention, and when Misao walked inside and sat down quietly, breaking the solitude, Kaoru kept her gaze pointedly on the vibrant flower.
The two sat silently for a moment before Misao's spoke, her voice holding an air of anticipation. Kaoru listened to Misao speak with one ear open as she let the idea of painting part of the gazebo slip through her mind. It would be quite interesting actually. Even painting a small portion of the thatched side, ornately carved with a multitude of brilliant flowers weaved through it. Brilliant. Finally, there was an idea that had some merit, Kaoru thought to herself with self-satisfied aplomb. Now, she had it! A place easy to escape to, and finally a project that would capture her attention for a few days.
"…and Lord Himura will be there as well," Misao finished with half a smile, her eyes turned expectantly toward Kaoru.
Kaoru's mind suddenly froze in mid-thought and she whipped her gaze to Misao. "What?" she asked bluntly, spearing her friend with a shrewd stare.
"You haven't been listening, have you?"
Kaoru frowned. "Well, I -"
"Don't even think of fibbing. I've known you too long to be fooled by your ill-conceived lies."
She remained silent for a moment, before replying, "No, I wasn't."
Misao smiled proudly. "As I was saying…," she started, "Lord Shinomori has invited my family, now that father has arrived, to dinner at his country estate not far from here. Lord Himura is currently residing at the estate for a sort of vacation, so he will be in attendance as well, along with a couple of other acquaintances of Lord Shinomori."
"When is this?"
"Tonight. The invitation arrived earlier this morning. It's short notice, but father agreed despite that."
"Well, that's…that's…"
"Exciting?"
Kaoru paused. "Unexpected," she murmured.
"Pardon?"
Kaoru shook her head while averting her gaze. "Nothing. It's not important."
Misao didn't comment, though her mouth curved upward in a knowing a smile, while her eyes studied Kaoru's face. "You've been keeping something from me lately," she mused more to herself than to Kaoru.
Kaoru started, and raised an eyebrow, trying to pull a façade of innocence over her features. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
"I'll find out, you know."
"There's nothing to find out," Kaoru stated nonchalantly as she stood from the gazebo bench and brushed her hands over the green folds of her gown.
"You are a terrible liar."
Their welcome to Sheffield Estate was warm and generous, and as Kaoru stepped into the lavish foyer of Lord Shinomori's country home, she couldn't help but let her eyes wander, taking in the beautiful decorations of the entryway. She had been in many beautiful abodes, but this held an aura of composed dignity with its gleaming marble floors, pristine white columns, priceless antiquities, and modest lighting.
The viscount was waiting in a quiet sitting room, presently entertaining guests who had arrived prior to them. He allowed those men to speak amongst themselves, making an intermittent comment every now in then, breaking the mask of inattention he schooled on his features.
There was a distinct thrum of excitement surrounding Misao as she stood in the doorway with Kaoru, and then finally followed her parents inside. Kaoru had to hold back a smile as she watched her friend's eyes lock onto their mysterious host. Lord Shinomori inclined his head slightly in welcome, though kept his position next to the fireplace.
With as much casualness as possible, Kaoru let her gaze scan the occupants of the sitting room, sweeping over them swiftly as she hoped to catch a glimpse of a familiar redhead. A small sigh of disappointment rose in her chest when he was not found. Joining Misao on a small loveseat, she smiled politely at the trio of men standing across the room and then turned her gaze away.
One man, who was more interested in the women that had just entered the room than his current conversation, excused himself and stepped over to Kaoru and Misao, his features schooled in a haughty expression of self-importance. Tilting his head upwards slightly so he could peer down his nose at the pair, Kaoru watched the corner of his mouth curve into a weak semblance of a smile.
Kaoru inwardly cringed and held back a groan. The last thing she wanted to do was hold a conversation with a man who considered himself a glorious specimen of mankind. The urge to roll her eyes, and let out a completely unladylike snort was overwhelming, and she felt a small slip of laughter escape her at the thought. Unfortunately Lord Dewberry thought her amusement was directed to whatever he had said, which Kaoru had effectively tuned out. She felt her heart sink a little at the possibility of spurring on the prig.
And then the worst happened.
He asked to escort her to dinner.
Kaoru barely suppressed a shudder.
"Well, I…I…," she stuttered, shooting Misao a discreet glare as she heard her stifle an amused giggle. "I…"
"She's already agreed to accompany me, I'm afraid, Dewberry. Isn't that right Miss Kamiya?" a familiar voice remarked from behind Kaoru. She felt a delicious shiver travel up her spine. Raising her gaze, she watched as Kenshin rounded the loveseat to stand directly in front of her. Reaching for her hand, he lifted it slowly and lowered a small kiss onto it in polite greeting. Kaoru suddenly wished she hadn't been wearing a glove so she could have actually felt his lips. Blinking slightly at that thought, she watched as Kenshin straightened and quirked a brow, waiting for her response.
"Oh, yes," she sputtered out suddenly. "My apologies, Lord Dewberry."
The man huffed indignantly, and remained mute for a little while after this unforeseen development. In an attempt to save face, he turned his gaze to Misao, who suddenly didn't find the situation at all amusing.
"Lady Makimachi, may I have the honor?"
Having no convenient excuse, Misao grudgingly accepted and stood up slowly to allow the heavyset man to lead her into the dining room as the commencement of dinner was announced.
It was a few moments before Kaoru turned her gaze to Kenshin, and found him staring at her with a peculiar expression on his face. Scrunching her brow as she observed him offer her his arm, Kaoru stood up from the loveseat and slipped her hand through the crook of his elbow.
"Is anything wrong?" she asked.
A small smile covered his lips and he titled his head to side. "No. But, it's good to see you again, Miss Kaoru."
Letting her eyes scan his appearance, she felt a familiar sense of contentment spread through her chest as she nodded to acknowledge his kind statement. "Thank you for rescuing me from a night of boring conversation."
"I am a gentleman."
"Yes, I believe you've already informed of that on a previous occasion."
"Can't let a lady forget." He paused. "Boring conversation, eh? How do you know I won't lapse into a drawn-out monologue about how to maintain a healthy shipping business?"
She scrunched up her nose. "I'd just kick you under the table. Politely, of course. Wouldn't want to ruffle any feathers."
Kenshin led her through the doorway and down the hall toward the dining room. "And if I continued despite your counteractive force?"
"I'd try to steer you conversation elsewhere."
"Oh? To yourself?"
Kaoru snorted and grinned. "No, no. Maybe your background, or whatever you've been doing these past few years. I've found men like nothing better to boast about their past accomplishment. Though…that could get rather tedious as well, I guess."
He hummed quietly in accord. "I doubt you'd find my past interesting," Kenshin returned with an almost melancholic smile, which piqued Kaoru's interest.
"Why is that?"
He sighed as they entered the dining room. Steering her to a seat near Misao's current location, he carefully shuttered his expression and replied, "I have few happy memories, and I wouldn't wish to ruin the night with an epitaph of sadness."
Carefully watching his face, Kaoru remained silent as she sat down next to her friend, and then followed Kenshin's movements as he rounded the table and sat across from her. His face remained expertly schooled, devoid of any emotion, and Kaoru felt a prickling of exasperation. Biting her lip, she discreetly looked to see if anyone was watching. Smiling to herself, she sat straighter in her seat and stared directly at Kenshin with a determined set to her lips.
The table was too wide for her to actually kick him, so she took another plan of action. Pulling her leg back, she swung it quickly forward, and artfully flung her slipper at him.
He acted as if nothing happened. Maybe she had missed?
Oh, wait. He slid his gaze slowly to hers, and speared her with a knowing stare. The corner of his mouth twitched, and he cleared his throat.
'Men,' Kaoru huffed internally as she watched his emotional shield dissipate a little.
"…isn't that right, Miss Kamiya?"
Kaoru's eyes widened and she turned quickly to Lord Dewberry, the man who had addressed her.
"Pardon, Lord Dewberry. I'm afraid I was woolgathering."
Out of the corner of her eyes, she noticed Kenshin cough into his napkin.
Dewberry was not ruffled by her inattention. "I merely asked if you liked the soup?"
"Soup?"
He stared blankly at her for a moment. "Yes. The soup in front of you."
Kaoru blinked and turned her gaze to the table. Sure enough, a steaming bowl of soup sat before her. "Oh, I'm sure it's wonderful," she replied with a forced smile as she grabbed her spoon. It was rather good, she admitted as she felt the flavorful concoction touch her tongue.
Kaoru carefully ignored Dewberry's next few questions, feigning a small attention span as she purposely made him repeat his words multiple times. Apparently he got tired of her lack of concentration and turned his attention to Misao, much to her friend's distress.
The unfortunate lack of privacy made it dreadfully hard to carry on a conversation with Kenshin, and Kaoru found that the small talk she managed throughout the majority of the dinner was becoming tedious. Misao was definitely shrewd in her observation of Kaoru's actions around Kenshin. Kaoru was sure she had noticed the slight hint of familiarity between the two, and she knew she could expect a curious interrogation at the end of the night.
In fact, when dinner ended, and the majority of men retired to the parlor and the women gathered to return the sitting room they had inhabited previously, she felt Misao's eyes boring into her when Kenshin rounded the table and asked her if she would join him in a tour around the house.
Thankfully, he carried her lost slipper discreetly in his hand, and passed it to her while no one was watching. She slid it onto her foot as quickly as possible. As she accepted his offer for a tour, Kaoru bid a polite farewell to the other occupants in the room and followed Kenshin out of the dining room.
"You do realize this is quite improper?" Kaoru questioned quietly.
"It will be fine," he intoned with a comforting smile, motioning behind his shoulder toward the maid that followed them discreetly.
She was silent for a moment. "If you say so," she replied, and tilted her head to the side. "Where are we going?"
"The gardens are very nice," he started, but wasn't allowed to continue when Kaoru suddenly expelled an excited breath, her eyes widening perceptibly.
"I completely forgot," she exclaimed, tugging his arm. "Come with me to the carriage I arrived in."
Faced with her obvious enthusiasm, he found he couldn't refuse, and followed her obediently as she led him his outside and down the gravel drive to where the carriage she had arrived in had been stopped. The maid serving as their chaperone stood a distance away, though never took her eyes off the couple. Quickly opening the door, she searched blindly for a moment before pulling out a large, thin package.
"Let's go somewhere to find some light," she said.
Kenshin led her back to the house, taking her quietly to the moderately lit library stemming with countless books. Making sure to keep the door open, he motioned Kaoru inside. It was there that she placed her package on the surface of one of the tables in the room, and slowly peeled away to protective paper covering which had kept the unknown possession hidden until now.
His eyes widened as they settled on the painting she had finished many days previously - the one he had watched her paint…the one which she painted with such hidden rapture, such apparent concentration…such need for success. The painting was stunning in its subtlety, the animals catching one's attention first for they were live subjects. But, what really defined the painting was not the living subjects, but the scenery, which stilled the heart because of its understated splendor and unusual luminosity.
Kenshin rose his gaze to Kaoru's expectant one, and he smiled. "Thank you for showing me this."
"How could I not?" she questioned with a pleased glint to her eyes. "I'm not sure I would have been able to finish it without your constant presence."
"I'm sure you would have."
"Wishful thinking," she rejoined.
"I do hope you've started your next work?" he asked, raising a speculative eyebrow.
Kaoru sighed and stepped back to slump ungracefully onto the cushions of a nearby sofa. "I haven't been able to."
"You plan to, though, right?"
"Yes. I was thinking of painting a portion of the gazebo in the estate's gardens, but now it seems almost too easy. Not challenging enough." She turned to the look at him, his form silhouetted against the backdrop of the orange fire flickering in the library's hearth. He calmly slipped his hands into his pockets. "Do you know of anyplace I might paint?"
Kenshin was silent for a few moments before shaking his head. "No, not at the moment. I might after some thought."
She nodded in response, and caught her lower lip between her teeth as she pondered his words. "You could write me, because I still won't be available for morning excursions. I know you're aware of the address," she started, turning her gaze to his, "I've forgotten to thank you for the painting you sent me. It was a very thoughtful gift." She heard his soft chuckle, and felt her heart warm at the sound.
"I thought maybe you'd see it as another sign that I am an absolutely disastrous painter."
"Quite the opposite, actually," she murmured.
Kenshin stepped closer to her and kneeled so that he was eye-level with her. Kaoru folded her hands in her lap and tilted her head to the side, silently questioning him. He held out his hand, imploring her to take it. Leaning forward, she did just that, settling her palm against his and rising to her feet amidst the rustle of her evening gown.
"I'll have one of the servants place your painting back in your carriage," he told her softly as they neared the open door.
"Thank you."
"And, Miss Kaoru," he began, "I promise to write to you about my thoughts on a suitable landscape for your art."
"I hope you have good suggestions," she replied as they walked down the hall.
"I'll do the best I can."
Kaoru laughed softly and placed her free hand on the arm he was currently leading her with. "I'm glad you were here."
He didn't respond immediately, and Kaoru turned her head to look at his familiar features. He stopped in the doorway of the sitting room where the gaggle of women were gossiping about one thing or the other, and with a slight bow of his head, Kenshin replied, "I'm equally glad."