Author's Note: Here we go again...
A special thanks to those who reviewed for the last chapter: Reignashii, Super Sheba, I Heart Edward Cullen, Royal blueKitsune, Valaroma, angelwings1, nebulia, crazy fanfic lover, en route, Threedaysunrise, Lendra-chan, skenshingumi, ixchen, Ravyn, fashionista, sulou, JadeLightning-Wolf, MikaylaMae, Em, girldisturbed, Anonymous but very interested, toxiclollipop, ShadeSpirit, Youkoforever, ChildlikeEmpress, and whoknoez.
Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.
A Soft Hope
Chapter 6
"Awakenings"
The study was quiet and empty save for himself, and Kenshin preferred it that way. Constant interruptions and noisy interferences had always bothered him when he was trying to concentrate, and in truth, he found nothing more meticulous than calculating sums, determining how much of something a particular ship could carry, what supplies said ship should be stocked with, and all the other necessities needed for a merchant ship to conduct a safe and speedy delivery. The work he spent most of his time doing these days was utterly exhausting. Oh, not physically, but most definitely mentally.
It wasn't a surprise that he found himself imagining that he was standing on the deck of the ship he was currently slaving over, gazing out across the choppy water of the ocean in preparation for some great journey. But such thoughts were pointless since Kenshin had no intention of being on a ship anytime in the near future, no matter how much his body yearned for the familiar rocking, the salt swept wind, and bright midday sun that accompanied ship travel.
Blinking slightly, Kenshin sighed and rubbed his hands against his eyes tiredly. He needed some rest. Imagining being on a ship was making him irritable, and the last thing he needed was to be immersed in a sour mood. Nothing could coax him from such a mood except a good night of sleep, empty of dreams and consisting of nothing but welcoming blackness.
But, lately his blackness had not been a retreat, because she invaded his mind even during those times that he considered his own. Though, he much preferred her face than the nightmares that plagued his dreams every now and then, bullying the comforting blackness and taking over his thoughts. It was odd how she managed to not only chase away the night terrors, but also the blackness.
Kenshin found that the more time he spent with her, the more she seemed to wiggle her way further into his subconscious, slowly becoming an constant, unbidden presence in his persistently turbulent mind.
He was getting too close to her.
He could feel it beginning to happen. He could the feel the easy friendship that had formed so intricately, so innocently around himself and Kaoru slowly deepening, becoming something more than was originally intended. The emotions that had started off as curious little seedlings were beginning to sprout and sooner, rather than later, he knew they would begin to bloom and show their true colors - show the complex and inescapable depth of heart that they invariably brought along with them.
Kenshin knew that he needed to begin separating himself from her, distancing their relationship back to what it had started off as: a mere curious acquaintance that spoke of only polite greetings and unassuming questions. It seemed almost overnight that Kaoru had…she had…
Well, she had become important to him. And there was only a handful of people that Kenshin considered important, and the fact that she had managed to sneak onto that list was slightly baffling and more than mildly troubling. And the most bittersweet notion of his entire relationship with her was that she wasn't aware of his past, of what had formed him into the man he was today - she didn't know of the horrible history he tried to keep hidden within him, the one he found himself trying to atone for everyday that he lived.
And as he sat and thought, imagining her reaction to the startling news she now knew nothing of, Kenshin closed his eyes and gritted his teeth, because what other reaction besides shock, antipathy and distrust could he hope to receive?
The door of the study opened and familiar figure stepped through the doorway. The man who entered was tall with unruly brown hair and was known for his loud, sarcastic attitude. He liked to lull people into thinking he was a big lout with no brain whatsoever, but Kenshin was well aware of the shrewd, loyal persona that was usually hidden so well.
"Sanosuke," Kenshin greeted, leaning back in the chair behind the cluttered desk.
Sanosuke lowered his head slightly in a respectful greeting, and then leaned lazily against the doorjamb of the study. "Aoshi wants to know if you've gotten any further with your…work?" he asked, quirking an eyebrow.
Kenshin was silent for a moment, his expression tense as he lowered his gaze to the papers in front of him. "You'll have to inform him that more time will be needed."
"He won't like that."
The corner of Kenshin's mouth lifted as he sent Sanosuke a slightly amused look. "And?"
Sanosuke didn't reply to the redhead's question, and instead narrowed his eyes astutely and cocked his head to the side. "You've been distracted lately."
"And?" he repeated.
"Do you think that's wise with all the things that need to be ready before we can send off the next shipment of textiles that Aoshi special ordered?"
"If Aoshi wants this shipment out as soon as possible, he's perfectly capable of sitting down and working out the grunt work by himself. But because of other responsibilities, he asked me to help. I'm merely a convenient addition to his progress."
"I know." Sanosuke paused, almost hesitating before speaking again. "But this distraction…aren't you getting too familiar? Too close?"
Kenshin was silent as he seemed to mull over that proffered question.
"She's going to ask questions soon. Are you ready to tell her everything?"
Kenshin let out a heavy breath, and lifted his head to gaze at Sanosuke with an intuitive and completely aware expression on his face. A sad smile covered his lips. "I'm not sure, Sanosuke."
The other man shrugged slightly as he grinned sheepishly. "Honestly it's none of my business." Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a slip of paper addressed to Kenshin. "This arrived about half an hour ago." Walking across the room, he held out the letter and handed to Kenshin, who in turn stared at the scrawled writing that spelled out his name on the front. Without another word, Sanosuke turned and walked to the door, which he silently exited from and closed behind him with a quick and barley audible snap.
Turning his attention to the letter he held in his hand, Kenshin hastily tore open the wax seal and revealed the contents to his quizzical gaze. The signature at the end of the letter had him confused, for it proclaimed that Kaoru had sent the note he held. But, the handwriting, though admittedly similar, was not hers.
The writing politely asked for his presence at Stirling Hall later that day or maybe tomorrow if he hadn't the time available currently. Frowning, Kenshin furrowed his brow and absently tapped his fingers against the desk. He didn't know whether to be concerned or merely curious by this new development, and he wasn't surprised when he felt an odd combination of both emotions rooting in his chest in an uncomfortable twist of sensations.
Scanning the note again, Kenshin decided on the best course of action. Reaching for a clean piece of paper while grabbing his quill, he moved to pen a note to explain his absence to Aoshi and Sanosuke.
The country was quickly becoming her new ally. It was easy for Kaoru to determine that she was slowly beginning to prefer the quiet and leisurely pace that it seemed to flow at, completely opposite of the demanding city. She had been blessed with wonderful weather this afternoon, as well as a comfortable and quite delectable warmth that spread easily over her skin.
And it was with a great sense of pleasure that Kaoru found herself sitting out in the pleasant climate upon her trusty folding chair, her easel placed in front of her and her paints available to her searching hands. Though she had previously expressed her dissatisfaction at painting the gazebo, Kaoru had relented that doing anything, really, was better than doing absolutely nothing at all.
She was silently planning out what to do first. There was a methodical way in which she planned every piece, and though this one lacked the usual challenge she heaped upon herself, her way of painting would not change.
One of the only conveniences of working directly behind the Stirling Hall in its veritable backyard, was the fact that she didn't have to cart her supplies around on Alistair as if were he were a pack-pony and risk damaging her work. But, honestly, Kaoru would have liked nothing better than to partake on another venture all on her own again.
'If only,' she sighed, pursing her lips and staring silently at the blank canvas situated in front of her.
She rolled her drawing pencil between the thumb and forefinger of her right hand and narrowed her gaze onto the portion of the gazebo that was the most detailed with its beautiful woodwork that was so intimately intertwined with the blossoming flowers of the garden. She tilted her head to the side, and then placed the tip of the pencil to the canvas and began to lightly sketch.
She had only managed a few small opening pencil marks when she heard her name being called in the distance by Stirling Hall's butler, George.
"Miss Kamiya," he interrupted, catching her attention.
Turning, Kaoru lowered the hand she held her pencil in, and twisted in her chair to face the elder man as he walked down the curved path of the garden toward her.
"Miss Kamiya," he continued. "Lord Himura, Earl of Glairmoor, is here to see you. Shall I show him here?"
Kaoru's lips parted with muted surprise, and she craned her neck to see if the earl stood behind the butler. "Oh, yes. Please do."
George nodded politely in response, turned and disappeared back down the path presumably to fetch the earl from the house and bring him back to where Kaoru was currently occupying herself. Kaoru felt the sudden urge to straighten her skirts and make sure her hair was properly in place, but belatedly decided against it, reasoning with herself that it wasn't as if Kenshin had never seen her disheveled from her self-encompassing work.
It was really quite refreshing not having to worry if he would think of her as a complete slob if she were slightly unfashionable at the moment.
Footsteps on the garden path alerted her ahead of time, and Kaoru quickly stood up from her chair in anticipation of Kenshin's arrival. When he rounded the curve, an unbidden smile teased her lips, and an unexpected swirl of pleasure curled in her stomach. His features held a congenial expression and his eyebrows were elevated in welcome as he walked closer to her standing form.
Kenshin's first glimpse of her, against the backdrop of the wonderfully decorated gazebo, made his heart do an odd, disconcerting somersault in his chest. The pretty turquoise gown she wore set off her complexion beautifully, and though her hair wasn't pulled back in the normal female fashion, and instead loosely contained by a thick ribbon matching the color of her dress, Kenshin found that her informal appearance only accentuated her natural charms.
"This is a surprise," she blurted out when he came to a stop before her.
"Well, you did send me a note inviting me to come," Kenshin responded, cocking his slightly to the side and spearing her with a knowing look.
Immediately befuddled, Kaoru scrunched her brow and opened her mouth too respond, but no words escaped straight away. She blinked confusedly before frowning and replying in an odd tone, "No, I didn't."
Kenshin sighed in response. "Just as I presumed."
Completely mystified at this point, Kaoru was only able to utter a terse, "About what?"
"Someone sent a letter to me, and signed your name."
Eyes widening, Kaoru lowered her gaze confusedly. "But, why? Who would do such a -"
At her sudden intake of breath and the narrowing of her eyes, Kenshin ascertained that she had a fairly good idea of who the naughty culprit was.
"I can't believe her!" she burst out quite suddenly, turning her astonished and somewhat irate gaze to his. "I ought to throttle her."
It was hard to contain his amusement at her outrage, but he did it nonetheless. "So I take it there's no reason for me to worry?"
"No, of course not." She paused. "Why? Were you worried?"
"Concerned is more accurate. When the letter came, it was obviously not in your handwriting, so I honestly didn't know what to think at the time. I decided the best course of action would be to visit."
Kaoru heaved a deep breath. "That's very considerate of you." He watched as she lifted her gaze, still obviously distracted by her irritation. She muttered some choice words under her breath that he wasn't quite able to understand, and then very suddenly her lips pressed together forcefully, and she sent a fuming glare to one of the second story windows. "She's watching," Kaoru breathed abruptly. It seemed like that last action completely undid any of her composure, and Kaoru leaned down, grabbed a handful of pebbles and tossed them viciously at the particular window she appeared to detest so much.
It was almost too much to watch as she gasped and muttered, "She's laughing at me." Turning to him, she repeated, "She's laughing at me." Scanning his features, Kaoru scowled and planted her hands firmly on her hips. "Go on. You're amused as well. You might as well smile or laugh and get it over with like her," she grumbled, motioned upwards with her shoulder.
"Well, if you insist…"
Quirking an eyebrow sardonically, Kaoru sighed and shook her head. She turned away from him as an amused smile slid slowly over his lips and the skin around his eyes crinkled. "Don't be too hard on her."
"Ha!" Kaoru retorted, with belligerence. "I should ignore her for a week."
Kenshin watched as she suddenly whirled around and began to walk, bypassing her painting supplies. She traveled through the gazebo, and continued down through the garden path.
"That's what I get for confiding in her," he heard her mutter to herself.
Before she could disappear out of sight, Kenshin decided following her would be the best plan, so he set off in even strides after her.
"Should we go much farther? We are getting out of sight of the house," he asked, glancing behind him as the numerous plants began to cover their presence in the plentiful garden.
"That is exactly what I intend," Kaoru replied mulishly.
"Are you sure this is a good idea?"
"No."
Kenshin was surprised to find himself chuckling as he caught up to her, keeping in stride with her willful walk. "Do you have a specific place where we're going?"
She hesitated a moment before answering, "Maybe."
Nodding more to himself than to her response, Kenshin replied, "Lead the way."
Sliding an arched look at him, Kaoru remained silent and continued forward until they reached the end of the quaint flowered path and came to a small uprising in the earth touched by only the large presence of an old oak tree. It was domineering and brilliant in its statuesque emergence from the earth. Wide braches radiated from the large trunk and spread numerous fingers of shade over the grass.
Peering at Kaoru as he heard her sigh heavily, he watched as she walked slowly up the incline toward the tree. He remained at the base as she stopped before the tree, turned and leaned back against the oak's steady girth.
"Are you okay?" he asked, scanning her weary features.
She raised her gaze to his, and he felt an odd sensation root in his chest at the warmth he found in the rich sapphire depths. Nodding slowly, Kaoru responded, "I'm just being silly." Chewing her bottom lip in thought, an uncertain smile crossed her features. "You know, I think that's first time I've been truly angry in a good while."
Stepping closer to her, Kenshin replied, "Did it feel good?"
She closed her eyes and look of peaceful pleasure covered her. "Oh, yes. I had almost forgotten what it felt like to want to physically slug someone."
"So in truth, you really are an overly aggressive person?"
Opening one eye to squint at him, Kaoru pursed her lips. "I can be when provoked."
Stepping even closer to her, Kenshin said, "Should I keep my distance, then?"
"You don't have to," she murmured.
He was only a few feet away from her now, his form directly in front of hers, his eyes trained openly on her searching gaze. He watched as her lips parted, silently noticing that she seemed to be having some difficulty keeping her eyelids open to match his compelling stare.
At that moment, Kenshin didn't know what exactly came over him, but as he neared her stationary form, it seemed almost like a separate entity took over his body and clouded his mind with thoughts he had not let himself feel in years. His breath seemed caught, his heart thudded heavily in his chest, and he could feel an impatient sweat beading his brow. He felt dizzy and disconnected and as nervous as a teenager.
As she stood in front of him silently, head tilted slightly while studying his discomfiture, Kenshin swore he could see that the very same emotions rampaging through his system were clearly present in her as well. She seemed to be in the middle of her own battle, filled with the swirling sensations that nearly immobilized him.
Swallowing, Kenshin realized he was thinking entirely too much. Reaching up carefully, his fingers slipped across the soft skin of her cheek, leaving a trail of blazing warmth. He felt her swift intake of breath and watched as her eyes widened the slightest amount, slowly filling with an amazing trust and innocence that completely humbled him.
Then, she did something that completely took him off guard. Leaning into him, she lifted her hands to wrap around his neck, fingers clasping tightly underneath his long ponytail. And Kenshin was completely undone.
Rationality screamed at him, but some things couldn't be stopped or ignored.
Leaning down, covering the small gap between the two of them, Kenshin laid his lips softly against hers. The sense of absolute righteousness that overwhelmed him was tremendous and wonderful and it would be something he'd always remember.
Kaoru was soft against his touch, her lips molded gently against his. He felt her tighten her grip around his neck, successfully bringing herself more fully against his body. She was completely intoxicating with her uncertain touches, her eagerness, and her apparent inexperience. And when he felt her lips part beneath is own, he was utterly lost in her.
Kaoru was quite sure she had died and gone to heaven. How had she never known how wonderful it felt to be kissed? It was an utter shame, really, that this was her first time. In her opinion, it would have been nice to have a little experience under her belt so that she didn't fell like an incompetent ninny when she was with someone who truly mattered. And as she stood with her arms clasped tightly around Kenshin's neck, her lips softly brushing his, she realized that he truly meant an enormous amount to her. But, it didn't seem the time to sort through her tangled emotions, and all coherent thought fled from her jumbled mind when she absently parted her lips and felt his tongue slip slowly through that innocent opening.
Oh…oh, dear.
It was quite sudden as she felt her knees dissolve into a puddle of mush, and if her arms hadn't been clasped around his neck and his hands hadn't been circling her waist, Kaoru was quite sure she would have made an embarrassing slide to the ground.
These new sensations she was suddenly awash with were almost startling in their intensity, and it was with his slow sweep of her mouth with his tongue that Kaoru felt a soft moan resonate in her throat. The slight sound seemed to catch Kenshin's attention, and when he gradually pulled his lips from hers, Kaoru felt bereft. She was certain that her disappointment showed on her face, and the slight smile on Kenshin's lips as he studied her made it apparent he had aptly read her apparent frustration.
He made a tender motion of catching a stray strand of her dark hair and tucking it gently behind her ear. Though she honestly could think of nothing to say at the moment, the silence that fell between the two of them was far from uncomfortable and awkward. It seemed absolutely natural.
Misao was still watching the gardens from behind her second story window when the unlikely duo appeared again…nearly a half hour later. It was good timing, too, because Misao had been planning to trek off after them soon if they hadn't returned within the next few minutes. They continued down the path of the garden, passed Kaoru's painting supplies, and instead of heading into the house, they traveled alongside the wall and around to the right side. Misao guessed Kaoru was bidding farewell to the earl for the day.
It seemed her plan the lure the earl to Stirling Hall had gone all too well, she mused.
It was couple more minutes before she saw Kaoru reappear, her face cast downwards as if watching her feet as she walked. She seemed to pause for a moment before remembering that she had left her supplies in the middle garden. As Misao watched her head back to the place she had specified for her art, she noticed Kaoru seemed slightly distracted, her footsteps slow and unhurried as her eyes seemed caught by some unknown object in the distance.
It was unlike her to be so preoccupied, and Misao pinched her brow in response as she pondered her friend's odd behavior. Whatever seemed to be affecting Kaoru must have been rather important, because when she moved to sit down, she almost completely bypassed the chair, but luckily caught herself sheepishly before she tumbled gracelessly to the ground.
Her behavior only intrigued Misao more as she observed her friend as Kaoru absently grabbed her pencil and ran it slowly through her fingertips instead of returning to the sketching she had begun an hour before. Prior to today, Misao had never seen Kaoru so befuddled.
Quirking an eyebrow, she bit the inside of her cheek and turned away from the window. She had every intention of dragging out the reason Kaoru seemed so distracted.
As Misao walked through the hallway and toward the stairs, a proud grin slipped over her lips as she began to imagine what kind of reaction Kaoru would have when they came face to face after her little prank.
Kaoru throwing the pebbles at her had been amusing, indeed.
The next few days were almost anticlimactic compared to the lively afternoon Kaoru had spent with Kenshin under the oak tree, away from the prying eyes of her friend. The following quiet days allowed her to escape to the gazebo for at least an hour a day to work on her new painting, and though usually her concentration was completely captured by her work, this time she constantly found her mind wandering, scurrying off here and there after every stray thought that crossed her…especially those containing a particular redhead.
Kaoru had come to the conclusion that she honestly didn't know what to think. She went over the meaningful moment countless times in her head, relived the new sensations that had taken her entirely by surprise, and almost absently, she found herself pressing tentative fingertips to her lips while lost in deep contemplation. It was almost irritating the way she drifted off into thoughtful oblivion, unintentionally closing herself off from the surrounding world.
So when Misao suggested to two of them travel to the attic and search through the musty junk to find some random, very old newspaper that apparently had an article about one of her ancestors, a great aunt or something, it was almost with unrestrained excitement that she accepted. The idea of a hunt for a lost item was thrilling and she took on the assignment with Misao with complete determination and seriousness.
As she expected, the attic was musty and dark. The two women brought a few lanterns with them for added light, but they also moved to the covered windows and quickly allowed the natural light to pour in and illuminate their surroundings. Kaoru had never been extremely comfortable in rooms filled with dust, and almost immediately she felt the telltale stirring of her nose as she yearned to sneeze. She only hoped it would be a single action and not a string of them that left her annoyed and stuffy.
And thankfully, after she sneezed once, she didn't feel the urge to repeat it.
"Bless you," Misao mumbled as she scanned the room.
"Thank you."
Misao chewed her lip as she pondered where to begin in the junk-filled, supply-riddled room. Stepping over to one corner, she settled down onto the creaky wooden floor and peered curiously at a large wooden trunk. She glanced up at Kaoru for a moment.
"I'll start on this side of the attic. Why don't you begin over there, so we can cover more space in a more condensed amount of time."
Kaoru followed Misao's line of vision and nodded. Weaving her way through the haphazardly piled objects, it took her a minute or two to reach her destination. When she finally did, she sank to the floor and folded her legs beneath her as she spread her eager fingers over a dust covered mahogany chest. With almost tentative movements, she slipped her fingertips under the top of the chest, and slowly opened it.
Folded clothes, a silver hairbrush and matching hand mirror, three books, and tangled mass of faux pearl necklaces were the only visible items. Pushing the clothes to the side, she only revealed more clothes. And under those clothes were more clothes again. Pursing her lips, Kaoru straightened the old dresses. Her hand stilled on the tacky pearl necklaces, and she lifted her head a little bit to gaze at Misao.
Grabbing the strands in her hand, she held them out in front of her and pasted a teasing grin on her features. "If I had known such treasures would be up here, I might have just fainted dead away," she expressed suddenly, catching Misao's attention from across the room.
Her head whipped up, eyes narrowed. Why she had taken Kaoru seriously was a mystery, but when she noticed the barely-contained merriment on her friend's face, Misao scowled darkly and huffed loudly.
"If you like them so much," she started sarcastically, "why don't you wear them? I'm sure they'd look smashing with your gown."
Kaoru pressed the pearls to the front of her bodice and pretended to admire them. "I think you may be on to something here, Misao."
Misao snorted in response and went back to her searching, pointedly ignoring Kaoru. With a slight shrug and a carefree smile, Kaoru slipped the necklaces over her head and allowed them to dangle around her neck.
The next few minutes were spent in silence as the two rummaged through, under and around a countless number of objects. Kaoru often found herself squinting for even though the windows were free from obstruction and the lanterns were available for assistance, she still couldn't quite see as much as she wished. The mustiness was getting to her as she sat on the floor, amidst the old and stale articles of clothing and boxes covered with aged grime.
It was with a narrow breath and the scrunching of her nose that Kaoru stood and stumbled over to the nearest window. Pushing against the glass, she hastily managed to unhook the latch and swing it open with a loud screech. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Misao grimace at the grating sound, but as the fresh air hit her face, Kaoru sighed with pleasure and proceeded to hold her upper body out of the opening.
Oh, that felt nice.
She hadn't realized exactly how stuffy it was inside until she had taken a breath of fresh air. From behind her, she heard Misao shift and then stand. The only other window in the attic screeched open and Kaoru heard a very audible sigh of relief accompanying it.
Leaning back, Kaoru frowned and stared at her friend for a moment. "So what exactly are we looking for? Some newspaper article?"
Misao ignored the question for a few moments before turning away from the bright view of the afternoon sun and scrunching her brow in thought. "My mother said she remembered seeing an article in an old newspaper about her my grandmother's brother's trek to India. He evidently wrote a short commentary on it, and the newspaper published it. I'm curious to read it."
"And what makes you think said newspaper is in this attic?" Kaoru asked skeptically, her eyes scanning the contents of the room that remained unsearched.
"My mother said she thought she remembered that the servants tended to stash newspapers up here in some odd box. They've been doing it for years."
"Do they date back as far as you want, you suppose?"
"I have no earthly idea."
Kneeling down, Kaoru poked at a moth-bitten folded cloak. "How do you get newspapers in this area anyway? We're kind of far from London."
"The previous week's worth is delivered every Sunday by messenger when we are in residence." Misao paused and raised an eyebrow quizzically. "You've been here for a little over a month. Haven't you noticed?"
"No."
Misao muttered something inaudible under her breath and turned away. Kaoru ignored her mulishly, and turned back to the work she had been entangled in previously.
The two women resumed their quiet searching, their heads bowed and minds buried in inquisition. It was a long half hour later that they finished with their respective sides of the room and converged simultaneously at the attic's center.
"It has to be here," Misao murmured to herself.
"Well…it doesn't have to be."
"It has to be," she repeated stubbornly.
"Why?"
At Misao's impatient glare, Kaoru shrugged innocently.
"I just know. That's why it has to be here."
Fully aware that Misao wouldn't appreciate another sarcastic retort, Kaoru bit the inside of her cheek to keep herself from speaking her mind, which became increasingly hard as she watched Misao bumble around, seemingly lost in the piles of cast-of items. Separately, they began to search through stacks of untouched objects, their eyes quickly scanning through things that were of no importance to them. It was after a dreary ten minutes that Misao uttered a happy cry, sounding as if she had stumbled on something amazing.
It was with wide eyes that Kaoru moved quickly over to where her friend sat on the floor, her hands buried in a box that could have easily been overlooked. It was covered in filth like everything else and when Misao absently pulled out a handful of browning paper, a cloud of dust accompanied the movement and infiltrated the air.
Kaoru snatched the papers from her in an attempt to stop Misao from spreading the irritating allergens even further, and then sat back on her heels to sort through the small stack of aged newspapers.
The papers were crinkled and stained from years of disuse, while the ink was starting to fade away on some of the oldest pages. It was amusing how many different years were available in the handful that Kaoru held. Some expressed dates from ten, twenty, even thirty years ago. There were two papers from the previous year that were still in good shape.
Most of the headlines on many of the papers were obscure and useless, while there were some articles with bold letters that were purely meant to be attention grabbers. Kaoru ignored them with a calculated smirk and continued on with her silent search. Only three more were left in the small stack she held, and Kaoru stood to move to a more advantageous angle to retrieve more. She was reaching out to grab another handful of additional newspapers when something about the paper she held on top in her hand caught her attention.
It was dated eight years ago, and had only one headline with damning words splashed across the top of the browning paper. She couldn't tear her eyes away from it.
EARL OF GLAIRMOOR, PRIVATEER OF THE KING, MURDERED HIS WIFE AT SEA
The article was short and held no relative details whatsoever. There was only inane speculation that was anything but factual, and in truth, made Kaoru's mind race even more than the original headline.
It was like a being hit with a train at full force, and suddenly she was finding it extremely hard to breathe.
It had to be incorrect. There had to be some mistake.
This meddlesome reporter had made a horrid miscalculation of the facts, and instead if correcting the blatant mistake, he'd vilified Kenshin in attempt for attention.
Kaoru's legs felt suddenly weak, and she didn't have time to search for a musty seat, for she sank like a puddle to the floor, her skirts fanning haphazardly around her.
As she stared wide-eyed, heart pounding erratically, and mind racing painfully, she realized that she was so wholly effected by this startling article because she had fallen quite inexplicably in love with Kenshin.
How, when, and why, were not questions she could knowledgeably answer. Her feelings just were. It was a horrible time to come to such a life-changing realization, and it unsettled her stomach tremendously.
Misao must have noticed Kaoru's sudden disquiet, because she looked up from her search, her brow puckered with obvious confusion as she studied her friend's deathly pale visage.
"Kaoru, is something wrong?"
Kaoru sucked in a shallow breath and turned her wide gaze to Misao. Lost, she blinked stupidly for a moment. "I," she whispered. "I…" Swallowing with great difficulty, she shook her head slowly. "I have to go."
Misao watched with lips parted in astonishment as Kaoru suddenly bolted to her feet unsteadily, turned and hurried through the maze of objects. A page of paper floated down to the floor having slipped unnoticed from Kaoru's fingers. Misao snatched it up and quickly read the unsettling proclamation.
Kaoru felt like she had suddenly been possessed. She heard Misao's startled call to stop, but her feet wouldn't heed, and her mind forcefully rebelled. Before she knew where she was going, what she was doing, why she was doing what her body so obviously was forcing her to carry out, she was at the stable, demanding a carriage to be loaned for her disposal. The stable hands were startled by her appearance and taken off guard by her abrupt behavior. But, they listened to her nonetheless.
Thankfully, one carriage was already hitched from the afternoon ride the baron and baroness had taken, so Kaoru was able to quickly climb inside and relay her decided destination to the available driver.
The carriage ride was an utter blur. Kaoru was trapped in a circle of never-ending thought that made the tiring forty minute journey seem like a mere blink of the eye. So when the rickety wheels rolled to a slow stop, she was quite surprised when the door to her right opened and a footman offered his hand the assist her down.
The sunlight was surprisingly bright as she moved from the confining protection of the carriage. Her footsteps were light and unhurried…almost hesitant now that she had reached the place she knew he would be at. The steps up to the front door seemed to stretch on forever, and so when she reached the top and stepped carefully up to the front door, she inhaled deeply as if to build up her waning courage.
The butler that answered her knock was obviously confused by her uninvited appearance, and so when led her inside, he made sure to explain that in the event the earl did not want to receive her, she would be required to make a quiet and hasty exit.
She waited in the provided sitting room anxiously, quietly buffering herself in preparation for confronting Kenshin. It didn't take him long to appear, and when he did, Kaoru felt her resolve stiffen. Her eyes scanned his familiar form, taking in his disheveled appearance and the heavy ink stains on his fingers. His hair was slightly messier than normal, and there was a tired strain to his features as if he had been slaving over his work for hours.
But, when he saw her, a completely natural smile, tinged with a shadow of concern, touched his lips.
It wasn't until he stepped closer and fully studied her features that the smile froze, and he stilled with noticeable foreboding. Something flashed in his eyes perceptively.
Kaoru's heart sank when she recognized that glint of emotion. Guilt.
Somehow he knew exactly what she was going to say. What she was going to ask. It was on the tip of her tongue to beg him to deny what he now so obviously knew what she was going to ask. But she stood frozen.
"Come with me to my study," he said solemnly, his quiet voice slashing through the tense silence. "It seems I have much to explain."