Erstin woke in agony. Every limb, every muscle, every fiber of her being hurt. It was the sensation that one gets from pinched bloodflow resuming after a limb is sat upon wrong for too long, only magnified and over every inch of her body. She nearly passed out again, but through a haze of pain, somehow she willed herself to stay out of the abyss of unconsciousness. There were dreams there... terrible dreams of purple crystals, betrayal and pain. She gasped in breaths of air, and even just drawing breath was an effort.
She inched her arms up, clasping them across her chest and rocking back and forth, her eyes clenched in narrow slits. Specific memories eluded her, but the general emotion of the recent past was still poignantly there. The pain was a punishment, and it was deserved, that much she knew. She forced down the sadness welling insider her that she couldn't even understand.
Why am I alive? It was a strange question without context, but she couldn't shake the feeling that she had survived something she hadn't been expecting to. She felt as though even now, shew as watching someone else's life, and that soon it would fade to dust. Through the ringing pain, she tried to sort her thoughts out well enough to get her bearings.
Her vision was blurry from crying, but the room was unmistakable. She was inside a guest suite of Windbloom castle, with overstuffed bookshelves lining the walls and azure curtains partially draping over a triple paned window. Weak sunlight leaked around the edges of the curtains, though whether the sun was rising or setting she could not say.
She heard the door to her room open, and she turned sharply, though it made her vision swim dangerously. "Nina-chan!" she gasped happily. But the figure that walked through the door was not Nina. "Yukariko-sensei..." she corrected slowly. "Why are you..."
In disturbing counterpoint to her usual unshakable cheer, Yukariko's wore the sternest face Erstin had ever seen her show. She and a pair of Windbloom soldiers filed into the room, followed by Miss Maria, who looked her usual strict self. Yukariko knelt next to the bed, giving her a shot from an injection tube. "This will bring your nanomachines up to full power, and help with the healing process."
Erstin felt a tingling wave spread through her body, followed by blessed numbness as the nanomachines shut down her nerves and began to heal her. She tried to form the words to thank her teacher, but her mind was still all jumbled, and Yukariko didn't look like she was mood to be thanked anyway.
One of the helmeted men moved to grab Yukariko by the shoulder. "Alright, let's go."
Miss Maria intercepted his hand in a vice grip and twisted it painfully, her aged face lined with anger. "Don't touch her. Just because you men line the corridors of Garderobe doesn't mean you have the right to do as you please to a noble and pure Otome.
The soldier who's arm was held winced and leaned into her hold, trying to ease the pressure of how his arm was twisted. "But... our orders were too..."
"Your orders were to allow us to heal one of our students, and that's what we plan to do." The older woman retorted succinctly, letting the man's arm go. The two men glanced at each other, each looking to the other for support, but it was hard to face down such fervor. Miss Maria didn't give them a chance, continuing with her tirade. "How dare you try and stop us from ensuring the safety of a student. Grand Duke Nagi assured us that we would be treated well, and if he hears of this..."
Yukariko turned back to Erstin, talking in low urgent tones over Maria's continuing distraction. "That was a very foolish thing you did, Erstin." She made small motions of checking Erstin's pulse and temperature. "I do not know what they told you, but bonding with a Slave is a wretched thing to do to yourself. Perhaps one in four will survive after the Slave is released, assuming they aren't killed in battle. And those that live? They often have irreparable damage to their body... and soul."
Erstin's pain was numbed, but her thoughts were still in disarray. Slaves? Irreparable damage?
Her teacher spoke on, heedless of her mystified expression. "The fact that you are still alive is a miracle... and not one granted to you by the cold God that Swartz worships. You may have turned your back on Shinso-sama, but She is forgiving. Even as you allied with those who try even now to end her, the Shinso-sama has granted you a new life, Erstin Ho." Her stern expression broke as she traced the back of her fingers down Erstin's cheek, a welling of sadness on her face. "I can only hope that you make better use of this one than the last."
The soldiers had rallied their courage, and pushed Miss Maria out of their way, pulling Yukariko up forcefully. "I'm sorry, Steinberg-san, but our orders are to let you deliver the medicine and then escort you out. They were very clear you can't speak with this one."
Erstin watched the two women being pulled away. She tried to call out in thanks to them, but she felt her eyes growing heavy. The nanomachines must be draining me. She had enough time to hope her sleep would be dreamless before the darkness reclaimed her.
-----
The first thing she saw as she slowly opened her eyes was a figure in a Coral uniform with pair of mulberry pigtails walking out of the room. A burst of adrenaline shot through her system, and she called out. "Nina-chan!" At least thats what she tried to say, but instead, she only manged to croak something unintelligible in a voice thick with sleep.
None the less, it had the intended effect, and Nina turned, her face lit with concern. "Ers?"
Erstin cleared her throat, trying to get her thoughts in order. "Nina-chan..." she repeated, more successfully this time.
Nina hung in the doorway in a half turn for a moment, then finished the turn and walked back into the room. "I just came to bring you food." She made a pained smile, and indicated a plate on the nightstand filled with fruit and cheese. "They said you would be sleeping for a while longer, but..." she trailed off.
The blond haired girl struggled to rise. The pain was gone, though she was still mostly numb. A quick glance down revealed her to be nude under the blanket, so she drew it up with her, making sure it still provided a measure of modesty as she sat upright in bed. Most of what had happened had returned to her now, but she wasn't sure where to begin. "Sit with me." she asked quietly.
Nina hesitated, swallowing uncomfortably. "I... I have things that I need to..."
"Please? Just... sit with me."
"Al... alright." Nina tentatively sat on the side of the bed, positioned to show mostly her back to Erstin's view.
Erstin could feel the tension in the air, and she knew that things would never be the same between them. She desperately wanted to know what had happened; whether the tragedy she had tried to stop had continued to unfold while she slept. Nina was exceptionally good at keeping her feelings bottled up, so her countenance was of no help. The only thing Erstin could read in the rigid back of her roommate was the fact that something was causing her intense emotional discomfort. Erstin pushed away her dread, hoping for the best. "I... I hope you didn't get hurt."
"Nothing that didn't heal quickly." Nina's voice was flat and dead.
"Major Wong... he's doing well too?"
"Father..." Her voice caught slightly on the name. "Father is not in any danger. He's still asleep, but the doctors say he'll be fine."
Erstin waited to draw in two deep breaths before asking her next question, preparing herself for what the answer might be. "And Arika-chan?"
"We fought... but... inconclusively." Nina shook her head slowly. "I can't be sure, but I don't think she was hurt any worse than I. She escaped, and no one can find her or Queen Mashiro."
"Oh." Erstin said quietly, concealing a sigh of relief. When the pair had materialized their weapons, she could read their murderous intent in their eyes, and had feared for the worst. Mostly it had sounded as if everything had come out for the best, or at least as best it could, considering the circumstances. But if all of that was true, why was Nina so unhappy? She looked over Nina's rigid posture for clues. The girl across from her was trembling, and for a moment Erstin mistook it for anger. Fear raced through her heart. "Ni... Nina-chan?"
Nina turned so that Erstin could see her face for the first time since she sat, turning just enough to shoot a sorrowful glance at Erstin through teary eyes. "How can you sit there and look at me so calmly?" she challenged vehemently. "After everything that..." She raised a hand up to her face, watching it tremble uncontrollably for a time before finally reaching up and grabbing it and holding it still with a grimace. "I... I nearly killed you, Erstin." She threw her hands down in disgust. "I saw you trying to stop me. I knew what you were trying to do. And I still swung." She shook her head slowly. "I don't know what would have happened if..." she trailed off and sniffed violently, rubbing a sleeve across her eyes and blinking rapidly. "No, that's not true. I do know. If I had killed you... I think I would have become a monster."
Erstin watched her counterpart hide her face again, shoulders slumped in misery and self loathing. The blond worked her mouth silently for a moment; she knew she should say something comforting, but nothing came to mind. There were a hundred justifications, a thousand apologies, a million missed chances, but none of them seemed appropriate. Erstin raised her hand slowly, her fingers outstretched towards Nina's back, only the barest of inches and a lifetime of timidity left to overcome.
And suddenly, it didn't matter anymore... none of the fear, none of the self doubt, and none of her worries for the future. Death had come to claim her once, and only then had she realized how much she had left to do. Nina needed her now... and that was all that mattered.
Erstin moved forward, drawing the blankets with her, clasping her arms in a gentle embrace around Nina in a reverse hug. The other girl jerked in surprise, letting out an uncharacteristic noise of surprise, but didn't react other than that. Erstin rested her chin on the velvety shoulder of the Coral uniform, breathing the scent of Nina's hair, feeling the loose strands brush across her cheek. At some point in the last minute or so the nanomachines had finished their work and they were beginning to allow her nerves to reactivate. Now the rough texture of the covers rubbing against her otherwise bear chest sent pleasurable tingles down her spine. She exalted in the sensation; exalting in being alive.
Nina shifted in confusion, sending further sparks through her. "Ers? What are you..."
"Don't blame yourself, Nina-chan." Erstin breathed quietly. "I knew what I was doing when I ran in between you two. I just couldn't bear to see you two hurt. Truly, there is nothing to forgive, but if there was, I would forgive it a hundred times over."
Nina sat in brooding silence, slowly absorbing that. "But..."
"No buts." Erstin interrupted, her voice gentle. "Let's just forget, okay?"
Forgiveness was not one of Nina's strong points, especially when it came to her own failings. But for Erstin, she would try. "All... alright. If that's what you want."
Erstin felt her heart beat faster. "It is." she spoke with confidence.
They sat like that for a long while, and Erstin luxuriated in Nina's presence. But as time wore on, she could feel Nina's self consciousness growing, becoming more uncomfortable at their proximity. Erstin regretfully flopped back on the bed, drawing the covers up to her chin and smiling timidly.
"So much has changed..." Nina said, breaking the silence and looking at Erstin.
"Yes." Erstin agreed, hiding her smile under the blankets. Nina looked so cute right now... with all of her false bravado and sternness ripped away, leaving only the inner core of the girl she loved. "But we can change to. It's a new beginning for both of us."
Nina stared at her, but then broke into a matching smile. "I like the sound of that. Not an end, but new beginning."
The blond girl reached out from under her blankets, clasping both of her hands around Nina's. The mulberry haired girl's hand was cold, but it warmed quickly in Erstin's grasp. "We'll start over together."
"Together." Nina agreed.