A/N: Just a quickie filler so I can progress the story. Enjoy anyways.

"JULES!" Kevin called, storming into Jules' apartment sopping wet at a quarter past ten. None of the lights were out. Jules was still awake. Kevin groaned. "Jules, you're here, right? Come on out, I need to talk with some who ISN'T hormonally stressed!" Kevin paced the living room for a minute or two until Jules emerged from the bedroom, her bangs in curlers, and her toes separated by cotton balls. She wore a nightshirt and tight jeans, no bra evident. What a 'lovely' sight.

"Kevin? What's wrong? Is it Leslie?" asked Jules. Kevin collapsed onto the couch.

"Can I have a shot first?" he asked instead. Jules shuffled to the kitchen and poured two splashes of gin into two glasses, then serving one to Kevin and one to herself. Kevin took a long sip and sat there silenced for a minute.

"You know what Alec and Leslie are doing right now?" asked Kevin.

"Sleeping?"

"Together," said Kevin. Jules spit her mouthful of gin back into the glass.

"Alec and Leslie are screwing around? Ugh, is it even possible for Leslie? That's disgusting!" said Jules, cringing.

"No. They're not doing it; they're just on the couch together. Alec's holding Leslie in his arms and their both sleeping," said Kevin. Jules went red.

"If THAT'S your news, then go home, Kev. It's too late to cry over having loved and lost!" said Jules. "I have to actually get up tomorrow, so—"

"—Jules, I still love Leslie," said Kevin. Jules sat down after a moment next to Kevin.

"Kevin, what happened to the 'Love Sucks' philosophy you were living off of six months ago?" Jules asked. Kevin WAS turning into a pathetic little puppy chasing after a potential mate. It made Jules sick to think that she, Kirbo, and Wendy were the only three left who didn't let love fuck up their whole lives. And even in that case, Kirbo's fiasco with the brown-haired intern (who, in Jules' opinion, could've used a nose job and a detangler) Wendy's nearly unnatural relationship with Billy, and her own old affairs with her boss and other married men, kinda were temporary fuck-ups. Billy and Wendy were a long-distance couple, but at least they were realistic about it. Kevin was being plain sappy in still chasing Leslie.

"Suddenly the sucking stopped," said Kevin. "Now that she might be having my baby, it's reignited the flame."

"But you're gonna get burned and fast if you think she'd rather have Alec," Jules warned.

"Do you think I don't know that? I mean, what if I'm not the father? I lose her! I lose her and the baby!"

Jules rolled her eyes. "Kevin, slap yourself. You're starting to sound like Kirbo did," said Jules.

"At least Dale Biberman wasn't potentially carrying Kirbo's love child! I mean, why does Leslie always end up picking Alec? He treated her like shit and she still won't give him up!"

"That's NOT how I remember it, Kevin, and you know it!"

"That's not the point! Love does suck," Kevin moped.

Jules groaned. "Kevin, if you ask me, you're being a hypocrite. You talk about Alec treating Leslie like shit, but who's the one who wants to be the father of Leslie's baby just so he has a clear path to Leslie? When she has the baby, it will be the baby who Leslie devotes her life to first and foremost. The fact that you just want Leslie back disgusts me."

Kevin sat back and pondered this for a full minute. "You're right. But…I love Leslie. I actually think I love the child too. If neither are mine in the end, I'll be back to square one, and no one on this goddamned earth wants to be where I was."

"Kevin, you won't be at square one. You have a better job at the paper. The only reason you think your life is shit is because you're not getting out. Meeting women, gaining a social life instead of keeping yourself locked in your room like a recluse listening to Aretha all day…"

"You know about my Aretha albums?"

"Kevin, honey. Everyone does."

Kevin turned red for a second.

"What will you do if you are the father, Kevin? Use the baby to chase after Leslie? Make her think she owes you?"

"No. I mean, a daughter will give me a little more purpose, you know? I'm not in it completely for Leslie. Having a baby of my own…I mean, what if I never find the right girl?"

"What if you don't and Alec's the father?"

"I'll jump off the face of the goddamn earth," Kevin said. Jules frowned and knitted her eyebrows together. "Seriously? I really don't know. I have no other girl friends besides you and Wendy, so…"

"I can be your social connection, Kev! I have a few chicas I can introduce you to if you want!"

"Thanks, Jules!" Kevin laughed. "But even if I'm not the father, I still want the baby in my life. I've been doing all this stuff for Les and been really happy about all of it."

"I doubt Alec and Les will cut you off from the kid. But Kev, look at it this way: if Alec's the dad and he and Les get back together, they'll be tied down to the kid and you and I can go out partying and meeting people!"

"But what if I want to be tied down?"

"Kevin, you're crazy if you want to be tied down!" Jules said, getting off the sofa to put away her shot glass.

"I do. I mean, I don't want to die a bachelor! I wanna leave a few pups behind to carry on my legacy!"

"What legacy? A two-room skanky apartment, a set of bongos, and a moldy ashtray you stole from the D.C. Holiday Inn!" Jules said.

"That's been my point all along! No one lived forever. That's why people have kids, so the kids can carry on the memory of the parents, right?"

"I guess…" Jules came back out onto the sofa, this time with a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.

"Well, if I die without kids, then I'll be just a forgotten memory that no one gives a shit about. If Leslie's daughter is mine, then at least I know I have a little piece of me left above ground when they stick me underneath it. It's a comforting thought, always has been for me," Kevin said.

"Whoa, deep."

"No one in my family's lived to be over 55. Did I tell you that? The Dolenz curse?"

"No," said Jules.

"My great great grandparents met in Portugal, right? SO they get married and punch out four kids, the oldest being my great grandmother. They turn 55 and decide to emigrate to the states with the kids. The ship sinks halfway across the ocean, the four kids lived, but the double-great ones were lost at sea. After that came some kinda war that took my greats away at 53 and 54. My grandma and grandpa got cancer and emphysema, respectively at 49 and 51. My mom's 52 with lymphoma and my dad died in a car wreck at 41. My clock's ticking, Jules," described Kevin. Jules lit up a cigarette and took a delicate puff.

"Kevin, you can't believe in all that bullshit," said Jules.

"But I do, okay? I'm already 24, you'd think I'd at least have MET someone by now! I'm at my fucking mid-life crisis!"

"Kevin, you're being a goddamn drama queen. Talk to Les in the morning and get all this settled then, okay? But I'm tired and need some fucking sleep," said Jules. Jules took the opened cigarette pack and handed it to Kevin. "Want one?"

Kevin stared at the pack. He almost took one out but thought about Leslie and her unborn baby's health. It wouldn't do him any good to get re-addicted. Kevin chucked the pack on the floor, got up, and left Jules in the apartment without a single word of departure.