Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form. I don't own the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy ether. So get your lawyers off my lawn.
Hidden by the Fox
Chapter 7: D-Ranked
The Ninja's Guide has this to say on the strange phenomenon of the Daimyo's Wife's Cat: Since there have been D-ranked missions, there will always be one particular D-ranked mission; a mission that once reduced a team of Cloud Gennin into psychotic wrecks. The mission to retrieve the Daimyo's Wife's cat, or, as gennin across the globe say, catch that #$ Cat.
It doesn't matter what lord's wife lost the cat, what hidden village the request is directed to, or which cat it is. Since the first D-ranked mission, Gennin from around the world are still catching the local lord's wife's cat. It also answers the question as to why many ninja don't have cats.
"Goddamn D-Ranked missions," Naruto grumbled.
"Heh, I'd say looking after the daycare for a day should be classed as a C-Ranked mission," Sasuke snorted.
The group of Gennins looked like they had been dragged through a hayfield. Naruto was covered in many multicoloured splashes of paint. Hinata looked like she had been run over by a bunch of 4 year olds. Gaara had things, such as whisker marks and black eyes, drawn on his face with black marker. Kimimaro was soaking wet from head to toe. Haku had his hair tied up in millions of crude ponytails, and brightly coloured elastic bands. Sasuke was fine, but he had two dried streams of blood originating from his nose, on his face.
"You had to teach Konohamaru the Sexy Jutsu," Sasuke snapped.
"Sorry we couldn't help you with your mission," Obito said jumping out of a tree. "We had to help clean up some birds that got covered in oil."
If glares could be converted to heat, Obito would be a pile of ash.
The Guide has this to say on D-Ranked missions: One day, someone got the bright idea to hire ninja to do jobs he could pay the kid down the street to do. Thus the first D-ranked mission was born. These missions are the main reason Gennin try with all their might to be promoted to Chunin. (See: Lord's Wife's Cat)
The Next Day
"Okay," Arashi announced to Team 5, "You have a choice for missions today, they are… catch the Wave Daimyo's Wife's cat, baby-sit Ms. Takashi's kids, and paint an apartment building."
"NO MORE &$ D-RANKED MISSIONS!" Naruto roared. "THEY DO NOTHING IN THE WAY OF EXPERINCE, ANY CIVIALIAN COULD DO MOST OF THESE MISSIONS, AND IF I HAVE TO CATCH THAT #$ CAT ONE MORE TIME I WILL GO INSANE AND KILL EVERYONE!"
A stunned silence penetrated the room, after Naruto's outburst, until Arashi gathered his wits and said, "Okay then… we happen to have a C-ranked mission available. The local bridge architect, Tazuna has requested protection for his family and himself, from a corrupt businessman known as Gato. Since Gato usually employs hired goons this mission was given a C-rank. In return Tazuna is building a bridge to the mainland, which will benefit our village greatly."
Everyone in the team glanced at each other in silent agreement. "We accept," Naruto finally said.
A man with a grey bread, a pair of square glasses, and a sake bottle in his hand stumbled into the room. "Don't tell me you gave the job to a bunch of brats," he grumbled taking a gulp from the bottle.
Naruto was about to yell something when Rin stepped in. "Sir, these brats could take on at least two hired goons easily, and if things go wrong we are Jounin so we should be able to handle the problem."
Rin turned to the group of Gennin. "Okay be ready in 15 minutes, meet us at the memorial."
The memorial of the Hidden Fox village was a giant balancing rock, with the symbol for the hidden fox village and the names of the ninja that died in action, carved into its smooth sides.
Naruto walked up to the stone and placed a few sticks of incense at its base, lighting them quickly with a fire jutsu.
"Rest in peace heroes of this village," he said before joining the rest of his group.
Like some of the smaller hidden villages, the Fox Village was actually hidden. Storms raged around the island the village was located on, while the storms were far away from the island itself they prevented ships and enemy ninja from approaching from the coast. The giant redwood forest that surrounded the village also gave it concealment.
"Um… Tazuna-san, why are you drinking so much?" Hinata asked, as Tazuna finished the bottle he was holding.
"Oh, ninja make me nervous," Tazuna grumbled. "The Wave has a lot of superstition surrounding ninja."
"Such as…" Naruto asked quizzically.
"Well, the wave had a hidden village, before you guys came, the Village Hidden by the Tides. It was built on the same spot the Fox village is now on," Tazuna explained.
"So what happened to it?" Hinata questioned.
"Well, it is said that it was here the Kyuubi came into this world. That demon fox wiped out the entire village. Its chakra created the storms that surround the island. The only places where there are no storms are where this island is closest to the main island. The burst of chakra the fox unleashed supposedly caused the trees around here to grow so high."
"So our village really is hidden by the fox," Haku mussed. "So what does that have to do with superstitions?"
"Well… it is believed that when ninja again set foot in Wave Country, it will mark the arrival of one who can control Kyuubi's power. Well were here."
The group had arrived at a house surrounded by thick woods
"Inari, Tsunami, and Kaiza I'm back!" Tazuna called out.
"Grandpa you're back!" a boy wearing a white hat called out.
"So these are the ninja you hired," a man with spiky black hair and an X-shaped scar on his face said. "Well come in Tsunami just finished making dinner."
Team 5 were then introduced to Tazuna's daughter, Tsunami, his Grandson, Inari, and his semi-son-in-law, Kaiza.
Later in the Night, Outside the House
"Okay, the boss wants the guy with the scar alive; however we can kill whoever else is in the house," a rough looking man, wielding a katana, said to his companions.
There was the sound of swords being drawn as the men advanced on the house.
Authors Note: Okay I know the ending is a bit rushed.
Also I'm trying not to follow the original story too closely, please tell me if you think I am.