Disclaimer: I don't own Life with Derek.

A/N: So, here's the next chapter. Had to post it before school. Enjoy.

Chapter 11… Stealing the Sissors

x o x x o derek's p.o.v. o x x o x

I felt my eyes widen at the sight. A slightly healthier-looking Casey, leaning back in her bed, a blank look etched into her face and a spork digging into her arm. Right under her IV. My head raced with thoughts until everything felt like it was either going to blur into white or sharpen until everything was black. Even as she caught my eyes in hers and quickly moved to place the utensil back on her tray of food, everything felt so surreal. Like I was going to wake up at any moment. You don't know how bad I wish this were all just a dream.

She stayed sitting up, not breaking our stare, her mouth slightly parted, as if waiting for me to say something so she could explain. Or whatever it was that she wanted to say.

"What were you doing with that thing?" I said, opting to put my arms loosely across my chest, not exactly in a way that said 'You better tell me now or you're going to be encountering an angry Derek', but more in a way that said 'Tell me, please. It's concerning.'

She just swallowed and broke our conversational gaze. "You know what I was doing Derek, don't play dumb," she said quietly, pleadingly even. I just stared at her. I knew she wanted to say more than that. I could almost see words on the tip of her tongue. Which brought a whole mental picture to the back of my head, but never mind that. She just had so much more to say.

"I know what you were doing, I was just hoping I was having hallucinations or something. Doesn't sound like such a bad idea right now. Drugs would make this all a hell of a lot easier to take," I let out in a ramble, not exactly thinking before speaking. Apparently it was a very wrong thing to say, because I saw Casey look away from her hands and fix me with a teary, yet fiery stare.

"Sorry to be so much of a burden!" she spat, keeping her eyes on mine until she chose to lean back resolutely into her bed, continuing her intense glare with the ceiling above as if determined to burn a hole in the papier-mâché tiles.

I felt an exasperated sigh escape my throat as I struggled to find a response to her abrupt anger. "I didn't mean it like that Case. God!" I said, well, sort of screamed. I ran a hand shakily through my bed-ridden hair and looked irritably down at the floor, casting it a gaze similar to Casey's. It just gleamed back at me, hard, cold, plastic, and completely unsympathetic and unavailing.

I looked up to see Casey with the spork in her hand again, right arm stretched in anticipation of contact with the flimsy instrument. "Casey!" I yelled, infuriated, advancing quickly on her and attempting to steal the stupid thing from her white knuckled hand. What the hell was she thinking anyway?

She just turned slightly in her bed so my hand came in forceful contact with her elbow, which must've forced the spork's prongs into her skin because she gasped in slight pain. She cast me a tearful glance over her shoulder before turning back to her arm. "You don't understand," she said, in a voice so low I had to listen hard to hear over the incessant beeping filling the room. "I have to get it out. I just… I have to…"

Her body started shaking in small, suppressed sobs and I brought my hand away from her shoulder and around her body, enveloping her in a small, but firm hug from behind. She made no response at first, but slowly she became more and more receptive, leaning into me, letting her sobs get louder. I had placed my head on her shoulder and saw her grip on the utensil loosen gradually until it slipped from her fingers and she turned herself around in her bed slowly to face me, my own grip on her loosening just enough for her to turn to me.

She looked like she was in so much pain; she looked so broken, so hollowed out. Like the world was so close to done with her and she herself wanted to be gone. And I suddenly understood why she might want to get that IV out. It was her lifeline, practically the last string to cut before she could finally have her way and leave, no matter what kind of mess she left behind. But I'd just stolen away the scissors and brought her crashing through the earth from the cold dark hell she'd spun herself into. I felt the room become too bright and nauseating as I continued to stare into her red, tumid eyes, the windows to her flickering light of a soul. She pulled me hard against her, but it wasn't close enough. I needed to break her free of her chains, chains she wasn't yet strong enough to break. But if she could just know how much at that very moment that I cared for her in a way I hadn't cared for anyone else and couldn't for the life of me fully explain. If she only knew…

x o x x o x x o x x o x x o x x o x

x o x x o casey's p.o.v. o x x o x

The moment the spork left my hand I asked 'Why?'. Why was he doing this to me? Why was he stopping me from doing the one thing I need to do? I screwed up my face in rage, anger, anguish. Every emotion to do with pain seemed to be on overload. I felt myself close my eyes tight as my chin quivered. And suddenly all will to go on left and I felt drained of all energy. It had taken me so much destruction to reach this point; a point I never wanted to accomplish reaching. Discovering that I wanted to be gone, that I actually wanted to kill myself, made every movement too much to take. Even as I fell into Derek's body I cringed and swallowed down even more pain to turn to face him. I stopped to look into his eyes. Hurt. It's all I saw. And I tried to look away but I was trapped in it. Drowning in it. Hurt that I've caused him. Hurt that I've caused myself.

And then I saw his face leaning in, coming closer to mine with each second. My mind blared with unfinished thoughts that all left my mind as soon as I felt his lips on the numbing skin of my forehead, my cheeks, my chin, soft, slow kisses, slower even still as his lips came closer to mine. A sob caught in my throat and I quickly swallowed it down, closing my eyes for just a second before opening them to Derek's eyes on mine, flitting from my eyes to my lips. We were so close. I felt my mind shut down as I felt his breath on my lips. It was hot and moist, tentative, completely amazing. It was the only thing in that one moment that made sense.

His hand came to my cheek as I felt him cutting through the air between us. And then finally. His lips, slightly parted, met with mine. And the world exploded.