Chapter 20

Snape stopped dead in his tracks, staring at Dumbledore with a hard expression. Dumbledore continued to look at me, waiting for some sort of reaction.

I looked back at him with as much calm as I could muster. "Don't I have a say in any of this?" I said quietly, willing my voice not to get shaky. "Why do the people who know the least about all this get to decide what happens?"

"Because they have that happy power," Snape snapped. He pulled his chair out roughly and sat down at his desk again.

"Severus," said Dumbledore, a hint of warning in his voice. He turned to me again. "I cannot overrule the Ministry, Armilla. I know you are aware of the Order and my current reputation with the Ministry, but these people are in denial about what is happening in our world." He sighed, shaking his head. "If your brother and I were to come forward and claim that your father is a Death Eater and therefore not a suitable guardian, there would be serious consequences. Aurelius Snape has a terrible amount of influence at the Ministry."

Dumbledore paused, looking troubled. "I'm afraid I cannot keep you from him, Armilla. We have to be very careful. Anything we claim could threaten the positions of Order members, especially Severus' position, as your father would think that your brother is working to keep you from him. He already doubts Severus' position."

"Headmaster," Snape interrupted, looking extremely agitated. "I do not think Miss Kemp needs to know all this."

What? I didn't need to know all this? So if Dumbledore put up a fight to keep me from my father, he would probably lose anyway? My father could have anything he wanted? If Snape put up a fight it would threaten his position with the Order and consequently his life?

I suddenly found myself wishing Merle was alive again and I could go back to not knowing my true identity. In all the years of wild imaginings about my family, I had never dreamed that something like this would happen. But then, I never dreamed I would be a Snape.

"She needs to realise what sort of position we are in, Severus," said Dumbledore, glancing at Snape over his half-moon spectacles.

"I do realise the position," I said, trying not to sound bitter. "There's nothing we can do."

It looked like my father would have to have custody of me for everyone's sakes. The issue of my guardianship seemed tied up in the battle between the Order, Ministry and Dark side. As long as I went to my father, the Order could run smoothly and without turmoil. I shouldn't really think about myself then. How could I make a fuss and refuse? I would have to bear it. I didn't want to be responsible for Dumbledore or Snape carrying the weight of heavier burdens than they already were.

Dumbledore was tracing his mouth with his index finger. He looked thoughtful. "Well," he said. "I think I can use my power as your current guardian to request that you attend Hogwarts for the rest of your schooling. That is, if you brother wishes you to remain here?" He raised an eyebrow at Snape.

Snape nodded slightly. "Of course," he said.

"As I understand it, you will be seventeen before you start your final year and so you will not have to remain with your father."

I nodded. It wasn't as if I would have to spend a lifetime with the man. It was really only the summer holidays until I turned seventeen.

"Also," Dumbledore continued, "I am going to try my best to ensure that Severus is granted some responsibilities." He looked at Snape. "You don't have a bad rapport with the Ministry. I dearly hope to secure a joint custody, claiming that Armilla would be more comfortable with that."

Comfortable with Snape? Oh sure, he was simply a dear. Better than your father though, a voice in my head said.

"I will put my case forward," said Dumbledore, "that you have requested joint custody of Armilla at the very least, and that Armilla herself wants this as of course, she knows you better. I hope I can do this without too much trouble. Do both of you approve of that?" He looked directly at me.

I didn't answer at first. Of course, I was not going to be comfortable with the whole thing. But given the choice, I would rather stay with Severus Snape than Aurelius Snape. But I knew that Snape didn't want me at all. I hated knowing that I was a sudden inconvenience that had appeared in his life.

"Yes," I said uneasily.

Dumbledore met my gaze, his expression serious. "You're not sure about Severus agreeing to be responsible for you. You're worrying about becoming a burden to him?"

Ah well, there was the proof that the man could read minds.

"Yes," I said quietly, pushing the lump in my throat back.

Dumbledore turned to my brother. "And how do you feel about all this, Severus?"

Snape leaned back slightly in his chair. He glanced at me briefly and then directed his attention to Dumbledore. "I suppose you cannot control what life deals you," he said. "The position we are now all in calls for sacrifices on all our parts. I did not think I was suited for the role of parent, but I do not want my father to have complete responsibility over a fifteen-year-old child. If taking on a certain amount of responsibility myself means that I can deprive my father of it, then I approve of the plan."

It seemed to me that Snape only wanted shared custody so he could get revenge on our father. I felt like I was stuck in the middle of a family war – my family's war. I assumed that Snape didn't really speak to his father, except at Death Eater gatherings. He would surely have to renew that contact if they were both going to have guardianship. That is, if the Ministry approved it.

Dumbledore got to his feet. "I have another meeting with them tomorrow and I will propose this plan. Until then, say nothing of what we have discussed to anyone. Though I daresay, now that the Ministry and your father know, it will become common knowledge before long."

That meant all the students. My friends would know. My teachers would know. And the House of Slytherin would know that I was the daughter of Aurelius Snape, the only Slytherin possibly more powerful than Lucius Malfoy.

Snape must have been thinking along the same lines, for his face had contorted into a scowl. Everyone would know that the evil Potions Master had a fifteen-year-old sister in Ravenclaw.

"I trust that Armilla will be down here again tomorrow evening?" said Dumbledore, standing in the doorway of Snape's office.

Snape stood up. "Yes, she will be. We will be here after dinner."

"Good, I will come down and see you both. Goodnight." Dumbledore left, closing the door softly behind him.

I got up to leave, seeing as I'd already been dismissed when Dumbledore had come in. I felt sick, really sick. I hadn't even met my father and I already was cringing at the thought of spending time with him. The fact that he knew I existed made me shiver.

I must have looked troubled as I made my way to the door because Snape called me back.

"Miss Kemp." He looked uncertain. "I suppose I'll have to begin calling you by your first name if we are to appear convincing to the Ministry."

I nodded slightly.

"We cannot pretend that there will not be hard times ahead. My father…our father is a very powerful wizard, both in magical power and influence. To live with him will require a significant amount of strength on your part."

I nodded again, trying to push my anxiety away.

Snape looked like he was having a hard time himself, having to speak to me through the role of my brother rather than my teacher.

"No matter what happens," he said, his eyes fixed on mine, "the Order will not leave you out in the cold…I will not leave you out in the cold. I do acknowledge that you are my sister, but that is something I have still to get used to."

I nodded yet again. I wanted to say something, but I just didn't know what. Gnawing guilt that had started growing inside me was making its presence known at that moment.

Snape gave a curt nod. "You may go."