Chapter 31

I opened my eyes blearily when I heard the front door in the sitting room close. Snape was back. It must be lunchtime.

I groaned and rolled over, closing my eyes again. The bed was so warm I didn't want to get out.

I hated to admit it to myself, but Snape had been right. I definitely should have taken the morning off. I had spent another twenty minutes in the bathroom after Snape had left for classes.

I hated my father. The whole ordeal he put me through contradicted his letter anyway. He was adamant that I receive excellent grades in every subject. Well, that would get a bit harder to achieve when I was not allowed to go to classes due to side effects from a potion I took to heal injuries from a horrific punishment my father mailed to me! Stupid git.

When I had finally been brave enough to leave the bathroom, I was so exhausted that the thought of going to classes was not enticing at all. I wasn't about to tell Snape that he had been right. I didn't want to set a precedent. I had changed, gotten into bed and remembered nothing after that.

Time couldn't have gone that quickly. I didn't want Snape to come back yet. I wanted another couple of hours to sleep. That was wishful thinking though, as I soon heard his footsteps coming down the hallway.

I opened my eyes as Snape strode into the room, his black robes billowing out behind him. He stood, looking down at me, his face inscrutable as always.

"Ah, nice to see you're not still in the bathroom," he said, dryly.

"Mm," I said, rubbing my eyes, trying to keep them open.

"I've left your school work out in the sitting room," he went on. He narrowed his eyes. "I can see it was a good decision to leave you here. I doubt you would have gotten far in your other classes today...not that Professor Binns would have noticed if you'd fallen asleep in his class."

I smiled. To be honest, missing History of Magic wasn't the worst thing in the world.

"I trust you're feeling better?" he asked, more serious now.

I shrugged as I sat up. "Alright, I suppose."

"Good." Snape walked towards the door. "Well you slept through lunch so you can have an early dinner instead. Something plain though; I don't want a repeat performance of the side effects you showed off this morning."

Ignoring his jibe, I swung round to see the clock. "It's not lunchtime?" How long had I slept? Why hadn't Snape woken me?

"It's four-thirty, Armilla," said Snape from the doorway. "I've had lunch and taught four classes while you were sleeping. I don't think you were as fine as you thought."

I glared at him. "Alright," I said, heatedly. "You were right."

He smirked. "Indeed." He disappeared into the hallway. "Come and eat."

I joined him out into the sitting room and watched as he sat down at the table. I took the seat to the left of him, where there was a plate with a sandwich on it. I still didn't feel like food, but I began to eat anyway, preferring that than Snape's wrath.

Snape summoned a pile of parchments I recognised as the most recent fifth year Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff Potions essays towards him. He pulled a bottle of red ink and a quill towards him from the centre of the table and began marking.

We sat in silence, except for the feverish scratching of Snape's quill every now and then as he found something to criticise. He had left my school work on the table and I chose to go over it while he marked essays.

"Ah, here's your essay," Snape remarked, unrolling the scroll. "Since you assured me it was not completed at a time you ought have been sleeping, should I expect high quality reading?" He glanced at me, raising an eyebrow.

"I finished that one on Saturday afternoon," I replied, trying not to glare at him.

He didn't answer, though his eyes scanned the top. "You'll have to start signing your new name," he commented, picking up his quill. As it had been written on Saturday, that had been the last piece of homework I had signed as Armilla Kemp.

"I have been," I said quietly. "Professor Flitwick is quite fond of the new name."

Snape rolled his eyes. "Yes, he told me how delighted he was to have a Snape in his House."

I watched for a moment as he focused on reading my essay. It was a bit of an unnerving experience to have Snape, who had always been my harshest teacher, mark my work whilst I was sitting there. I distracted myself by going through my History of Magic work instead, trying to ignore every time Snape started writing something.

"It seems you had a comprehensive understanding of the task," Snape said finally, putting his quill down. He slid the parchment over to me.

I was relieved to see that I had gotten an Outstanding. I had gotten the highest mark plenty of times before for my Potions essays, but this time, it meant more.

"No need to look so relieved," he drawled. "You raised some well-founded insights, which is better than simply regurgitating research."

I stared at him, waiting for the criticism, but he merely picked up another essay and continued to mark. I looked down at my own essay, taking in the comments he wrote here and there, replying to points I had made. Snape was always thorough with his feedback.

Finally, when he was about a quarter of the way through the homework, Snape pushed the scrolls aside. He summoned a new sheet of parchment, opened up a black bottle of ink and handed me his quill.

"Time to reply to Father's letter," he said, menacingly, flexing his fingers as he spoke. He summoned Father's letter from the coffee table and began to read it again.

I pulled the parchment towards me and looked expectantly at my brother.

Snape closed his eyes for a moment and grimaced. "Dear Father," he dictated, his lip curling as he opened his eyes.

I scratched out the greeting.

Snape sighed, glaring up at the ceiling. When he looked back at me again, he frowned. "Alright," he said darkly. "Let's do some serious lying."

Fifteen minutes later, we had finished. Snape had done most of the reciting, being eloquent as usual as he had addressed different parts of Father's letter.

Dear Father,

Thank you for your recent letter and the money enclosed.

My true identity is known by the whole school community now and I assure you that I will strive meet your requests to the best of my ability. I do not wish to disappoint you in any way.

I apologise for being impolite to Draco Malfoy. I did not intend for him to take offence, and in future I will be sure to pay him the utter most kindness and courtesy whenever we come into contact.

I am still receiving good grades in my classes and Severus has made it clear to me that he will not tolerate any falling grades either. I spend much of my spare time studying as I hope to achieve high marks in my O.W.L.S.

Hoping you are well,

Armilla

I handed the letter to Snape to read over.

He pursed his lips as he read through it, evidently finding much of its contents offensive. Finally, he folded and sealed it, nodding.

"It makes me angry reading it," he said, "so it ought to please Father."

He replaced the lids on the ink bottles and stood up, holding the letter. "I'll go and send this off now. I also have more marking to do when I get back. I suggest you work on your homework for now."

"Alright," I replied, picking up my school work. Snape left and I walked down the hallway, back to my bedroom.

The mahogany desk in my room was quite nice. Sitting down, I pulled open the drawers and was pleased to find them filled with spare parchment, ink and quills. Thankful that I wasn't very far behind on my homework, I worked steadily for an hour and a half. I had heard Snape return and I supposed he was doing his marking at the table again.

At about seven o'clock, Snape called me out to the sitting room. As soon as I set foot in the room, he had his wand out.

"Legilimens!"

Thrown off for a split second, I pushed the memory of Lisa calling Snape a git from my mind and immediately put the steel arm in place, concentrating hard.

I felt Snape pushing further, trying to pull my defence down. I countered it by putting more steel arms up, desperate to succeed. I didn't want Snape sneering at me. I was already tired though and it was taking an extraordinary amount of effort to keep the arms in place. Finally, Snape relented.

"Not bad," he said, "considering that I caught you off guard. Your friend would do well to remember her place though." Snape looked at me closely. "Though from the flash I saw, Miss Turpin seemed to be speaking only with the intention of being heard by you." He gave me a significant look.

I looked away. I didn't really want to discuss Lisa with him and I was sure Snape didn't give a damn about the troubles between fifth year Ravenclaw girls.

He didn't press the subject anyway.

"Now," he said, going into full lecture mode. "I am going to teach you one of the many shield charms. This charm in particular is effective because not only does it shield you from a curse or charm, it returns it twofold to the caster."

"Duoscutum," I said, more to myself than to Snape. I had remembered reading about it in one of the books Snape had given me.

Snape looked mildly surprised. "You have heard of it, I take it. Enlighten me then, what makes this shield charm stand out against the others?"

"The fact that the curse or charm is returned twofold," I answered. "The impact is twice as hard and it takes twice as long to react once you have been hit with it."

Snape nodded in approval. "Very good."

I gave a small nod, feeling satisfied, but hoping my good fortune in remembering those particular details was not going to run out.

"I trust you have memorised the wand movement and enunciation of the charm?"

"I have." Thankfully.

"Very well," he said, raising his wand. "Let's try, shall we? Instead of using a mental shield to stop my intrusion, you will use Duoscutum. Legilimens!"

Instinctively, I put up the steel arm at strong as I could, simply out of habit. Snape broke the spell, looking displeased.

"Armilla, what did I just tell you to do?"

"Sorry," I mumbled. "Habit."

Snape nodded, looking calculating. "Well, I suppose I cannot complain when you are doing it out of habit. That could very well help you. But you cannot simply rely on a mental shield because it can be broken and you are not causing me a great deal of trouble by doing it. You can ward me off, certainly, but you are not distracting me in the least. Don't focus on your mind itself, focus on the exterior. Shield the exterior with your wand and repel me."

I nodded, raising my wand, staring fixedly at Snape.

He smirked. "You certainly look ready for an attack you're suppose to be unaware of. Stop looking so pained. Legilimens!"

The room before me vanished. I was four; I was hiding under Merle's big bed, like I always did when I'd had a nightmare. I tried to push it from my mind. I concentrated on my wand and the spell I had to do. I saw Snape's figure come back into focus and I raised my wand.

"Duoscutum!"

I felt a powerful surge and I suddenly saw a new image. Snape and my Father were standing alone in a hallway.

"I have just as much right to her as you have," Snape snapped.

"Ah, but I'm afraid she will not be in your company at all times, Severus," Father replied.

I felt another surge of power and everything went black again as I fell backwards.

The room came into focus again and I felt a bit dazed. Snape was standing near the table, looking just as composed as if I hadn't just broken into his mind. I was sitting on the floor near the sofa, having lost balance when Snape had finally broken the spell that had taken him twice as long to break.

I supposed the memory I had just witnessed had occurred not long ago at the Ministry of Magic when Snape had gone to sign legal rights to me with our father. I got up, hoping Snape wasn't mad I had seen that memory. I found it quite unnerving. I wasn't looking forward to the day when I would be alone in Father's company. I felt safe with Snape.

"That wasn't too bad," Snape commented. "You reacted too slowly though." He folded his arms and raised an eyebrow. "Why were you under the bed?"

I blushed. "Nightmare."

He narrowed his eyes. "Ah," he said. "Wasn't about a blasted puddle was it?"

I glared at him. "I had never dreamt about puddles until that one time," I said, feeling annoyed.

Snape ignored this, however. "Let's try again. Improve your reaction time. Legilimens!"

We continued for another hour. My reaction time improved slowly, but I still preferred using my mental charm. Though the shield charm was meant to take the other wizard twice as long to respond, I still found that Snape was fairly quick because without the charm he would be lightning fast anyway. I only saw flashes of memories after that, none that I could clearly make out. From what I did see, Snape's childhood was certainly troubled. It made me feel more anxious about seeing my father.

Finally, Snape pocketed his wand again. I kept mine out in case he was tricking me.

"Time for bed," he said firmly. "At least when you're down here I can ensure you go to bed at a reasonable hour. In any case, you need an early night."

It was still early, but I was too tired to argue. I highly doubted I would win anyway. I pocketed my wand as well and walked towards the hallway.

"Goodnight," I said, as I passed him.

"Goodnight," he replied, sitting down at the table and opening a new potions journal.

I was halfway down the hallway when he called me.

"Armilla?"

I stopped in the hallway.

"Yes, sir…I mean…Severus?" Merlin, that was going to take some getting used to.

There was a long pause as I walked the few steps back into the sitting room.

Snape looked up from his potions journal, "Have your nightmares settled now?"

I shifted uncomfortably, feeling embarrassed. His expression showed no trace of mocking, but the last thing I wanted was to discuss my nightmares with him. They were still a frequent occurrence.

"Armilla." My brother's eyes were fixed on mine. "An honest answer, please."

I was silent again, obviously for too long, as Snape put his book down on the table, looking displeased.

"No?" he asked, scrutinising me.

"No," I admitted. "But...it's alright."

Snape didn't look convinced. "Shar?"

I nodded. "And Father, but mainly Shar."

He didn't look surprised. "Are you practising Occlumency before sleep? That may help."

"I am," I answered, "and it has helped a little."

"Dreamless sleep is another option," Snape went on, "but I wouldn't want you to become dependent on it. I'd rather address the issue at hand instead."

I wasn't sure what he meant by that. "It's fine," I insisted. "I can handle it."

He nodded, still watching me carefully. "I expect you to come to me if you can't," he said.

"I will." I knew I wasn't likely to do such a thing. I wanted to take care of myself now and not burden my brother. He had enough to be getting on with.

"Are the other students in your dorm aware of your nightmares?" Snape looked expectantly at me.

"No…," I said awkwardly. "I've taken to casting soundproofing charms before I sleep so no one hears."

Snape nodded, his frown deepening. "I understand if you do that in Ravenclaw Tower, but you are not to do it down here."

I felt uncomfortable. "I don't want to disturb you though."

He shook his head. "I am your guardian, Armilla. It matters to me if you are having nightmares. It's not something you're expected to deal with on your own."

I didn't respond. It felt strange to hear that my nightmares mattered to Snape.

Snape was staring at me. "No soundproofing charms," he warned. "Do you understand?"

I hesitated, but answered once his expression became a glare. "Yes."

Snape nodded towards the hallway, dismissing me, and I headed back to my bedroom.

Getting into bed, I sighed, exhaustion creeping over me. I closed my eyes, ready to practise Occlumency. I sorely hoped a time would come when Shar would plague my dreams no longer. The worst part was, even if he did disappear from my dreams, Father was well and truly going to be the replacement.