Chapter 33

I awoke early on Saturday morning with a terrible headache from crying the night before. Thinking back to the previous night, I groaned inwardly when I remembered that I had owned up to Snape about thinking I was a burden.

I felt embarrassed that Snape had had to reassure me, in his usual blunt manner, that I wasn't an inconvenience that he had to put up with. The last thing I wanted was to come across to him as a needy child in want of love and affection. I certainly wasn't looking for either from him and I knew anyway that I would not be getting either love or affection from him. We both knew he wasn't that kind of man. He gave me security and that was enough.

For now, I knew I could get love and affection from my mother. Though I had known her for a short space of time and still only saw her on a weekly basis, I had developed a strong bond with her. She loved to laugh so much that for hours on end she could make me forget all my troubles. Every time I visited her, there were no strict formalities or codes of etiquette that I feared I would have to abide by in my father's home.

My mother seemed so laid back and so proper at the same time. I thought she was beautiful in every way. Sometimes I wondered how she could be this way after having suffered for so many years as the wife of Aurelius Snape. Though she didn't talk about her husband when I visited, one time she started talking about her joy of having her son.

She didn't go into the details about Aurelius' treatment of Snape, but she would utter little statements every now and then detailing how much she loved her son and how happy he had made her. Once, she mentioned something about Snape growing more unhappy as he got older, and her despair in helping him, but I concluded from the information I had that my mother wouldn't have survived her husband if it hadn't been for having a child in her life.

I hadn't asked Snape about his relationship with Mother. Sometimes I wondered if he went to visit her in Dumbledore's office as well. I knew he went to the Headmaster's office on a regular basis on Order business and for staff related issues, so he couldn't avoid her altogether. If he did talk to her, Mother never mentioned it.

Though it was only six-thirty in the morning, I got up and showered. Lisa wouldn't get up for a couple of hours and I was quite happy to have some time alone. After dressing, I made my way to the Great Hall to get some breakfast to take back to the common room. The castle's corridors were draughty and deserted. The only people in the Great Hall were the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff Quidditch teams, up early for a quick practice before their match began later in the morning. I nodded briefly at my House's team, grabbed some toast and coffee, and headed back to the common room.

Twenty minutes later, after eating breakfast and avoiding looking at the small print of my textbooks, my headache was still there. Generally I would have gone to Madam Pomfrey for a draught, as many students, especially fifth and seventh years, went to her all the time for headaches. But Umbridge was keeping track of everyone who visited the hospital wing and Snape had specifically told me not to go there without seeing him first.

I had concluded a while ago that I would probably never go to the hospital wing again because Snape was a Potions Master and was skilled in Healing. Madam Pomfrey had seen so many students over the years that she rarely bothered to ask questions anymore - but Snape would ask questions. He never did anything without a reason. If I went to Snape for a headache draught, I would want to put up the steel arm so he wouldn't find out that I went to my dorm to cry last night. Then he would be angry that I was occluding in front of him again. And then I became paranoid that Snape probably knew I left so quickly because I wanted to cry – and not in front of him…Gee, no wonder I had a bad headache…

I had finished my homework the previous afternoon and the last thing I felt like with a headache was doing more studying. What I really wanted was to go and see Mother. I knew her company would make me happy. But Dumbledore was an extremely busy wizard and I knew he was being courteous enough to give me free reign of his office on Sunday mornings – I didn't want to bombard him now as well just because I was feeling low.

Suddenly getting an idea, I went up to my dorm and found one my larger texts on healing charms. I flipped to the back of the book to scan the index for headaches. I knew it seemed odd to be looking for information on healing headaches with charms when my brother was a Potions Master and could easily help me.

Headaches

Listed below are a number of possible solutions. Potions are generally the most reliable remedy for headaches, though a number of charms have also proven effective for the right case.

I scanned down the page, seeing about a dozen potions listed, each varied according to the circumstances in which the headache was obtained or alternative potions in case the witch or wizard was allergic to certain ingredients. I didn't want to make a potion. That would certainly cause a fair bit of attention in the common room, especially because I was the Potion Master's sister. Instead I searched for a charm I could use on myself. There were about twelve listed, but most of them had to be carried out by a second person, not on yourself. I knew neither Lisa nor Terry would consent to pointing their wands at me and performing a charm neither of them had used before.

My head pounded as I concentrated on the small print in front of me. When I was just about ready to give up I saw what I had been looking for.

The Adelorcapitis Charm

Do you have a headache just from the strain from reading this book?

Do you feel overtired or worn out from a heavy workload?

The Adelorcapitis Charm is effective against the common headache and does not need to be performed by another witch or wizard. This powerful charm soothes the mind without causing drowsiness.

To perform the charm:

Point your wand at your temple and enunciate Adelorcapitis (Ad-el-or-ca-pi-tis)

The charm will last according to the skill of the witch or wizard and the headache may reappear with lesser impact once it has worn off. Of course, potions are more effective.

For further assistance, contact your Healer.

I read it over four times. It was risky. But I had tried new charms out before that I hadn't learnt in class. Though admittedly, I hadn't pointed my wand at myself when trying a new charm. I was nervous about pointing my wand at my head. If I faltered at all, I could cause myself damage.

If I had been a Gryffindor, I may have attempted it, but my Ravenclaw reasoning skills won over in the end. I certainly didn't have the nerve, or stupidity in this case, to point my wand at my own head, no matter how determined I was to heal myself without Snape's assistance. And if Snape ever found out…I didn't want to think about the consequences.

For a moment I leaned back in my armchair and wondered why I had even bothered looking for a headache charm if I had no intention of performing it on myself. I wondered if Snape would teach it to me. Wouldn't it be useful in case I had a headache at Father's house?

I sighed, rubbing my temples. I sat there like that for a few minutes, completely lost in thought, a state I constantly fell into these days. When I opened my eyes, I closed the book in my lap.

My head was thumping now and I laid back on my bed, closing my eyes. I felt so low.

When the pain hadn't subsided twenty minutes later, I reluctantly put my hand into my pocket and pulled out the chocolate frog card. I wondered what the chance was of asking Snape for a headache potion without him asking follow up questions. As I glanced at the card, I saw that the wizard waving to me. That was interesting.

I sat up and turned the card over. I was supposed to meet Snape that afternoon for our lesson and I already knew the time and place, so I wondered why Snape would be communicating with me. I pressed my index finger against the wizard's name so the message could be revealed.

We won't be having your lesson in my quarters this afternoon. There has been a change of plan.

My eyes widened. A change of plan? My stomach gripped tightly. Maybe Snape had Death Eater engagements this weekend. I didn't like thinking about Snape's life as a spy. I concentrated on my reply and waited a split second for it to appear on the card.

Okay. Do you want me to come tomorrow instead or wait until Tuesday night?

I waited a few seconds. A moment later, I had a response.

No, I haven't cancelled your lesson. I have merely changed the location. I trust you were planning on watching Ravenclaw play Quidditch today?

Quidditch? Why would he care about that?

No, I don't feel like watching Quidditch.

Well that's not very loyal of you, but it certainly suits my plans. Have you any homework to complete this weekend?

No, I finished it yesterday.

You have made no other plans this weekend?

Only one to visit Mother tomorrow morning.

I will arrange for you to see her tomorrow night.

Won't I be here tomorrow morning?

No, you won't. I'd rather see you in person. Pack some clothes and anything else you may need for the weekend and leave your bag in your wardrobe. You can retrieve it from the armoire in your bedroom down here. I'll see you in twenty minutes.

What the? Where were we going? Oh Merlin, I hoped it wasn't to my father's place again. I was dreading December the twenty-sixth already.

Feeling really nervous and trying to ignore my headache, I got off my bed and quickly went about packing some things into a bag. It was only eight o'clock and the others were asleep, so I tried to be as quiet as I could. It was tricky to work out what to take, as I didn't know where I was going. I hated it when Snape was being secretive.

Leaving my bag in the wardrobe like Snape had instructed, I went over to Lisa's bed and shook her.

"Leave me 'lone," she mumbled, rolling over. "S'early. Still sleeping."

I shook her. No response. I kept shaking until she finally rolled back and pushed me away. She was not a morning person.

"Whadda you want?" she murmured, opening an eye to glare at me.

"Just to tell you that I'll see you tomorrow night," I hissed. "I could have gone and not bothered telling you of course if you so badly want to sleep. Just don't blame me for not telling you things."

"Fine, fine. I'm awake." She sat up, rubbing her eyes.

"I don't have much information," I whispered. "I don't know where I'm going. All I know is that I'm not going to be here for the weekend. I've got to go and meet Snape now."

Lisa looked shocked, and a little worried. "I wonder where he's taking you. Are you sure you'll be alright Mill?"

"I'll be fine," I said hastily. "He's my guardian, not my kidnapper, Lisa."

Lisa gave a small smile. "I know," she said meekly. "He's just so…"

"What?"

"Mean," she said simply.

I smiled too as I leaned forward to hug her.

"See you tomorrow night."

o

"Ah, there you are," said Snape, coming down the hallway as I stepped into his rooms. "Ready to go?"

"I suppose," I said warily. "Go where?"

He smirked. "Worried are you?"

"No."

"You'll see then. Go and put your cloak and scarf on and get your bag."

Why all the secrecy? The man seemed to love taunting me with his all-knowing air. I went into my bedroom and fetched what I needed. When I came back to the sitting room Snape had his cloak on as well and looked ready to leave. He held out his hand for my bag. I gave it to him and watched as he shrank it and put it in his pocket.

I moved towards the door, thinking it was time to go. I was held back as a hand grabbed my left wrist. I felt a sudden warm sensation through my body and I realised that Snape's hand had touched the locket on my bracelet. We looked at each other for a moment. The last time we had felt that had been back in the Secret Wing on the day we had found out we were brother and sister. I would have bet that Snape was also thinking about that moment. He had seemed so angry that day.

Snape abruptly let go and fixed me with a stern expression. Though I was tempted, I left the steel arm down.

"Before we leave," he said, "I would like to know if you are alright this morning. I was not left with the impression that you were last night."

I felt myself going red. Did he like making me feel embarrassed?

"I'm fine," I answered quietly.

He raised an eyebrow. "I'm asking you honestly, Armilla. Remember what we talked about last night?"

I nodded. How could I forget?

"I'm only suspicious," Snape continued, "because you said you didn't feel like going to the Quidditch game. I thought you generally supported your House at the games."

"I do," I said.

He was regarding me closely. "And you look very tired."

I couldn't deny that. "I have a bad headache, that's all."

Snape nodded. "Ah." He didn't look at all surprised, but he did give me a disapproving look. "Well, for future reference, when I ask after your health, having a headache doesn't qualify under fine."

I nodded, feeling like an idiot.

Snape swept off in the other direction. "Come."

I followed him down the hall and he opened the door opposite my bedroom, revealing a small Potions lab. Like his office, there were many jars of unsightly ingredients lining the walls. There was a large stone bench in the middle of the room and ornate cabinets on the far wall on either side of a large sink. I wondered if more secretive things were made down here.

I stood in the doorway while my brother unlocked one of the cabinets with a wave of his wand. "How much sleep did you get last night?" he asked, taking out a small vial containing a light green liquid. Uncorking it, he held it out to me.

"I don't know," I answered quietly, taking the vial from him.

"An inadequate amount then," he said, pursing his lips as he waved his wand again to lock the cupboard.

I looked away and drank the potion, trying to push away my discomfort at being under Snape's scrutiny. My headache vanished instantly and I sighed in relief.

"Time to go," said Snape, taking the vial and placing it in the sink.

I followed him out of his quarters and fell into step beside him through the freezing dungeon corridors. There still weren't many people about and we managed to get all the way to the front gates of the school without being held up by anyone.

Snape didn't speak the whole way and I was happy to remain silent. Once we were a fair distance from Hogwarts, he stopped and turned to face me.

"We're going to disapparate," he said.

I opened my mouth to point out that I couldn't, but then realised that Snape would know that of course.

"Did you ever do Side-Along-Apparition with Merle?" he asked.

I shook my head.

Snape took my left hand. "I will disapparate both of us," he said. "You must hold on very tightly or there could be disastrous results. I don't wish to leave half of you behind."

Alarmed, I subconsciously gripped his hand harder. Leave half my body behind? Ew.

He smirked. "Alright, then," he said. "Let's go."

I was suddenly surrounded by darkness. I felt an extraordinary amount of pressure against my body from all directions, followed by the sensation of being forced through a tube. In my panic, I tried to grab Snape's arm in the darkness with my free hand, but his other hand caught it first and gripped it hard.

Thump! Our feet hit the ground hard and I was sure I would have ended up on the ground if Snape hadn't been holding onto me. We were in a forest clearing and the frosty wind was biting against my cheeks. I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to catch my breath.

"Are you alright?" Snape asked, as I opened my eyes. My trembling legs felt like they'd been hit by the jelly-legs jinx.

I nodded, relaxing my grip on his hands. "We won't have to do that again, will we?"

He gave a tiny smile in response. "You'll get used to it," he replied, releasing me. "This way."

There was a lot of light in the clearing, telling me we were near the edge. Our cloaks billowed behind us as we walked through the trees.

"You'll learn how to apparate and dispparate in Sixth Year," Snape said, stepping around an oddly shaped tree root with a couple of bowtruckles scurrying along it, "though you'll have to wait longer than most of your peers to get your licence since your birthday's in June."

"Do many people leave body parts behind?"

"A few," he answered, looking grim, "though in my experience, those who already possess a disciplined mind and know how to focus generally do well." He gave me a pointed look and I was reminded that expectations were always high.

We walked on until we reached a winding narrow road. At the side of the road, a closed carriage was waiting with a thestral.

Now I was intrigued. Where were we going that you couldn't apparate, floo or get a portkey to?

Snape, as expected, offered no explanation. He opened the carriage door and gestured for me to get in. He climbed in beside me and soon the carriage was bumping along the winding road through the countryside.

"Won't the Slytherins notice that you're not at Hogwarts?" I asked suddenly, after staring through the window for a few minutes.

"They will be fine," he replied. "Teachers are allocated weekends off throughout the school year. Obviously, it's my turn this weekend."

"Didn't Umbridge ask questions about you taking me?"

"She doesn't know I'm gone," said Snape simply. "And she doesn't know that you're gone either. Too bad for her if she does find out. Only the Headmaster and Professor Flitwick know that we left."

"Are you going to tell me where we're going?" I asked.

"No."

Feeling frustrated, I looked out the window again.

"But we're about to go round a bend up ahead," Snape said, leaning over slightly so he could see out my window. "Then you'll see."

I gave him an inquisitive look, but turned back to the window nonetheless.

Finally, the bend in the road came up and the carriage turned. Instead of looking at a bunch of trees, I suddenly had a more impressive sight.

There, off in the distance, was a huge sandstone house. It seemed to have an endless amount of long windows and a grand entrance. It was completely isolated; I supposed the owner also possessed all the land we had been travelling on. It was certainly a beautiful house with well kept gardens. It seemed to give off a distinguished elegance and I couldn't help being impressed.

"What do you think?" asked Snape.

"It's wonderful," I replied softly, turning to him. "Who lives there?"

He looked back at me, the slightest hint of amusement on his face. "We live there."

Whoa! I turned back to the house. The carriage was slowing down now. We were nearly there.

"We live there?"

"Indeed," Snape said quietly. "That's Merrigan Hall. Welcome home."