A/N: again this has no reference to the ending of the sixth book tho it does follow Harry's sixth year.

Chapter 4

As Harry's thoughts drifted to Ginny, his steps slowed and a smiled played on his lips. To Harry, Ginny was the most the perfect girl. She was fierce, tough, insightful. She was beautiful with the fire red hair she despised. The freckles on her face accentuated her whole face. And her eyes were so beautiful; he could stare at them all day. She had a passion that few people could say they had. She didn't care what others thought. His second year was a good example of that. When she had sent him that singing valentine, she had felt little shame. Sure, she had blushed, but at least she had sent it.

Maybe that's what started it all, Harry thought, thinking about the time he had saved her from the Basilisk and from Tom Riddle. Maybe that's when I started to like her.

Sure Harry had known Ginny since she started school, but he never had those kinds of feelings for her, that is until this year. At least feelings he knew about. He had always thought of her as a friend. No, more than a friend, a sister.

His moments with Ginny were some of the happiest moments of his life. Did Ginny know that? Yes, Harry had kissed her, but did she know how much it meant for him?

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Waking up with a tear stained pillow and dry tears all over my face is not a preferred way to wake up. But that was how I woke up. I rubbed my face as well as I could without leaving the confinement of my bed, but eventually I discovered that I would have to get up in order to be properly clean.

So with that thought in mind, I tugged the hangings open and climbed out of bed. When my feet touched the cold, wood floor it sent shivers up my back. I looked around and saw that the rest of my roommates were still asleep, or in the process of waking up.

Before anyone could notice I was awake and decide that they wanted to talk to me. I scurried out of my bed and into the bathroom, which just so happened to be farthest away from my bed. I had almost made it to the bathroom before I heard a groggy voice say my name.

"Ginny?"

I acted like I didn't hear it and closed the door of the bathroom. I looked in the mirror and found that my expectations of my face were right. Dry tears crusted my face, my hair looked like a hurricane swept through, and the little make-up that I did wear was smeared all over my face. Thank goodness there was a bathroom in the dorm room. I don't think I would have enough nerve to go downstairs in front of everyone to find a bathroom.

I immediately took a washcloth and began to scrub my face vigorously in hopes of getting all the stained makeup off my face. After a couple of minutes of scrubbing I was finally satisfied with my clean, red face. Now to begin on the hair.

Staring at the tangle that was my hair, I decided the best course of action would be taking a shower and lather it in conditioner. I moved to the shower and turned on the hot water. I stripped out of my clothes and stepped into the steaming shower.

As the water pounded against my back, I could almost feel every stress, every worry, every little nagging feeling washing away with the dirt and grime. My relaxation was cut short though when pounding on the door and loud voices interrupted my reverie.

"Ginny! Come on! The rest of us have to use the shower too! Breakfast starts in little over an hour!"

I grinned as I heard Ambry's voice through the door. 'The rest of us' usually meant 'I have to use the shower and get all gorgeous for my boyfriend even though he's a loser' for her. Not that she'd say her boyfriend was a loser. That's just what I thought. Her boyfriend was Colin Creevey for goodness sakes. True, he had grown up and now instead of stupid photographs, he takes artistic ones which are really kind of gorgeous sometimes, but still, he was kind of weird.

So with Ambry now wanting to use the shower, I quickly finished conditioning my hair. I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. I dried off as well I could and then wrapped a towel around me. I opened the door and every worry that had washed off in the shower flooded back to me.

I stood in the doorway of the shower, my breath shallow and short. The images before me started to blur. I made to turn to run into the bathroom again but was cut short when I heard my name.

"Ginny? Are you alright?" Anna asked, concerned. The images grew sharper and my breath returned to normal.

"Yeah," I mumbled as I stepped away from the shower and toward my bed. I could feel the eyes of my roommates staring at me.

I sat on my bed, turned away from my roommates, thinking about what had just occurred. At home my room had been the only place I wasn't surrounded with pain. I had made sure of that. Everywhere else in the house I was enclosed by it. Here at Hogwarts, it was the same, except the bathroom was where my pain-free room was. Except I couldn't go in there whenever I wanted to.

With this revelation in my head, I started to dress in my school uniform.

Combing my hair proved to be a bigger adventure that I imagined. Not quite as big if I hadn't taken a shower, but still a big adventure. I'm pretty sure I lost a few thousand hairs from ripping at knots; it was finally knot-free after awhile though. By time I had finished combing my hair everyone was done with their shower and/or cleaning up. Most of them were dressed too.

My hair was still wet and I could feel it soaking through my robes as I walked out of the dorm and into the common room. I glanced at a clock on the wall and saw that I still had seven minutes till breakfast. I glanced around the common room and saw that it was empty except a few students who decided they wanted to sleep on the couches instead of their beds. I sat in an armchair free of dozers and waited till eight o'clock.

I heard footsteps on the stairs from the direction of the dorm and glanced up to see who would be interrupting the silence of the common room. Slowly Hermione popped into view, with her head down watching were she was stepping. She didn't notice me until she looked up at the bottom on the winding staircase.

She froze, staring at me and me staring at her. Finally she looked away and walked to an armchair near mine. I could tell she wanted to say something. I could feel the desire inside her. I wanted to say something to. I wanted to tell her that I was sorry for everything I had said. I wanted to tell her that I still wanted to be friends. But something stopped me. That something just so happened to be Harry. I could forgive Hermione, but not Harry and Hermione didn't want my apology, she just wanted an apology for Harry.

"Ginny I'm sorry," Hermione said quickly. At first I didn't understand what she said. I was still stuck in my thoughts. Slowly, though, the words registered.

"You're sorry?" I asked, still not comprehending what she was saying. Last time I had talked to Hermione, she wasn't exactly eager to apologize.

"Yes, I'm sorry. I'm very sorry," Hermione started. "I yelled at you at your house, and I shouldn't have. I was just very angry." She paused, debating whether she should continue. I urged her to do so. "I was angry at the way you were reacting to Ron's death." I raised an eyebrow and a spark of anger kindled inside me. "To me you were acting very selfish and I didn't appreciate it. I cared about him too, Ginny. Just because I wasn't his sister didn't mean I didn't care about him as much as you did. I had thought we were friends, but you proved me wrong. I needed to talk and you weren't there for me. I needed you." I bit my lip, trying hard not to yell at her.

Thinking it was safe, she continued, "And then there was the whole mess with Harry. I think you're wrong for blaming Harry, everyone thinks your wrong. Again, you're being selfish by blaming him when it isn't his fault. It was nobodies fault except the Dark Lord's himself. Ginny, Harry cares about you, a lot. The way you're treating him is killing him. Everyday he's moping around because you won't even look at him. Why can't you just talk to him?"

I glared at her. I couldn't help it.

"This is your way of apologizing? It's a pretty lousy way of it," I said. Movement caught my eye and I looked up at the winding staircase. I could just make out a tall boy with messy hair. "I don't know if I can forgive you Hermione, but I do know that I will never forgive Harry Potter." I said the last part loud enough just so he could hear.

Yes, I wanted my friend back, but not enough to forgive a killer.

I saw the figure on the staircase shaking his head with his head in his face. For second I felt sadness but I quickly replaced it with anger.

The clock rang, announcing the start of the new hour. I quickly got up from my seat and stalked out of the room and away from Hermione. Before I closed the portrait door I looked back and saw Harry sitting on a couch with his head in his hands and Hermione next to him, comforting him.

Again that inkling of sadness and remorse came back but I banished it. I did not feel sadness for a killer.

A/N: not as long as the others. and i'm not sure i liek the ending too much, but i'll deal. tell me what you think

annnnnd school starts up again tomorrow so i don't know how much time i'll have to write because soccer games are starting so yeah, we'll see. i'll still try to update ASAP. even if it means not paying attention during school. lol