Several months would pass before Chavez gained enough strength to be completely independent again. During that time, he and I made a decision that would change both of our lives. We rode back to Warm Springs to visit my father. Chavez introduced himself and asked, "Will you give me permission to marry your daughter?"
Father stood silently in his thinking pose. Chavez was of Navajo and Mexican origin, not a full-blooded Apache, as was preferable to the tribal elders. It was also considered undesirable for an Indian of any tribe to marry someone who wasn't full-blooded. This fact had nearly earned my father himself exile.
"Do you love this man, Daughter?" Father asked me.
"With all my heart," I replied.
"Then I see no reason to stop you." Father took Chavez aside, and the pair of them began haggling over what my dowry would consist of. Father decided on several blankets, a barrel of grain, some firearms and ammuntion, and fifteen pounds of beef. It was expensive to be sure, but I knew Chavez would give Father anything to make me his bride.
Chavez went to the nearest town to fetch the supplies, while I dashed off an excited letter to Billy. I hoped he was still at Beever's because I didn't know how the hell else to get in touch with him. Billy never stayed in one place for too long.
When Chavez returned, weary but triumphant, Father grinned and embraced him. He announced to the rest of the tribe that his beloved daughter Dancing Fawn (my tribal name) was to wed. There was much excitement at this news. The tribe spent weeks preparing for the wedding, during which time I received a letter from Billy:
Dear 'Rena, It's about time you and Chavez got hitched! I'm so happy for you I could bust. I wish I could come to the wedding, but I don't think I'll be able to make it. Anyhows, I'm writing to tell you that Susan McSween found a copy of John's will while she was cleaning up after the fire. John said you were the closest thing to a daughter he ever had, so he left his house and all its land to you. The property's gonna seem big at first, but I bet you two will fill it up with little ones in no time. Maybe someday when I'm not wanted anymore, I can come over for supper. I wish you guys the best of luck. Tell Chavez I'll buy him some whiskey to celebrate next time I see him.
Your pal always, Billy
I swore my eyes were playing tricks on me the first time I read it. John and I were close, but I never imagined he'd leave his whole ranch to me. He really was the kindest old man I ever knew.
On the first really fine day of spring, Father performed the ceremony that would bring Chavez and I together forever. The tribe cheered wildly for us at the conclusion of the ceremony, causing my heart to swell with happiness. The wedding day was rounded off with games of skill such as archery, a delicious banquet, and an evening of spirited dancing.
By the end of it, I was worn out from excitement. I badly wanted to retire to the teepee Chavez had built for us, but I was uneasy about what would happen once we were inside it. Despite Murphy's best efforts, I had left the saloon business with my virginity intact, and wasn't sure about parting with it.
"Querida, you're about to fall into the fire," said Chavez, gently placing his hands on my shoulders to steady me. "You need to rest."
I let him guide me toward the teepee. He opened the flap and lifted me up. Holding me, he crossed the threshold, depositing me on a blanket. Butterflies began to flap madly in my stomach as I watched him undress for bed. Chavez took me into his arms, resting a hand on my chest.
"Querida, your heart is going awfully fast," he said. "Are you feeling all right?"
"Yeah," I said, sucking in a deep breath to calm myself. "I'll be fine. Just give me a few minutes."
"You're nervous," said Chavez. He toyed with a strand of my hair for a moment before he spoke again. "I don't want to make you do this if you're not ready. I want you to be comfortable with it. There's no pressure; I'm ready whenever you are."
I felt his breathing change as he fell into a light sleep. I lay awake beside him, trying every trick I knew to calm myself down. Once I no longer felt like I was going to be sick, I tapped his shoulder.
"Your heart slowed down," Chavez observed. "Are you ready, Querida?"
"Yes," I declared.
"I won't hurt you," Chavez promised me.
The two of us quickly became one. Words can never describe the feelings I had, except to say I became a woman that night. Of all the things I'd done and couldn't undo, losing my virginity to Chavez was the one I could best live with.