Title: Conventio Custodis

Author: Calex

Rating: 15

Disclaimer: Again, not mine. Completely not mine. I'm just playing around with the characters, here.

A/N: Well, finished this chapter and God am I tired. The longest chapter so far, more background on her relationship with Søren and what had happened, a little…interaction with Kate and Pogue making a really good impression of Brooding!Angel. Hope you guys like it. I'll try to have the next chapter up by tomorrow.

Also, just to let you know, I'm going back to school on the 14th, so updates might be fewer and much slower in coming. Especially since the Internet Tyrants (a.k.a. the techies and various teachers) are ignorant arses and have blocked Also, if any of you guys are BtVS readers, I'm a writer on Twisting the Hellmouth under the same username, and a HP fic I'm currently working on is on Harry Potter Fanfiction Also under the same name. It's something I'm working on, a fic concentrating mainly on OCs set in the Marauder era, a rival pranking group to the Marauders. Seven OCs. Pairings are J/L, S/OC, R/OC. I'm trying to show the Slytherins in a different, less evil-manipulative-bastards-going-to-kill-all-muggles kind of way and more…normal. I'm trying to achieve an effect similar to A Knight's Tale, as in, 70s with a modern twist, and also adding some stuff to it to make Hogwarts seem more like a normal school, basing aspects of it with my own boarding school. Except, you know, magical.

Chapter 3

The next day dawned bright and beautiful and for once, she had absolutely no trouble waking up. Guess that's what sleeping for at least seven hours does for you, she mused as she stretched in bed after hitting the off button of her alarm clock. She smiled as she thought of the fact that she had an absolutely clear weekend ahead of her, and that grin widened as she remembered the night before. Taine rolled over and buried her head in her pillow to muffle the giggles that erupted at that thought. She felt absolutely giddy with happiness. She was in with the Sons of Ipswich, score!

It wasn't that Taine was a social climber, it didn't matter that they were one of the most popular groups in Spencer, but she couldn't deny the human part of her that piped up that the fact that they were and that they were hot didn't hurt a single bit. And Pogue… yeah, she was still confused about that and what it entailed, but she'd vowed to herself last night that she'd forget about all the troubles and just enjoy him, because Pogue was a guy to be enjoyed, that was for sure. She smiled softly as she recalled dancing in Nicky's, then the wild bike ride, and the almost kiss outside of the dorms. However, thinking about that brought back the memory of the pricking feeling of someone watching her. She knew she was probably just imagining things, but she had such a strong feeling of unease over it, and she'd always trusted her intuition. Something was telling her all was not right, but she didn't know what she was supposed to do. It really did seem as though she was just imagining things, and really, who was she going to tell? What was she supposed to say?

'Oh yeah, I thought I felt someone watching me, but when I turned around no one was there. But could something be done about it anyway…'? Not bloody likely, she didn't think. Taine snorted. The most reasonable thing to do about it at the moment was to forget it. It was unlikely that it was anything much, and really, there wasn't anything much she could do. With a sigh, she got out of bed, swinging her legs over the side and shivering slightly in the cool morning air. It was November already and winter was very obviously coming. There was a chill in the air, a slight bite that hadn't been there for summer, or the majority of autumn. Padding naked into the bathroom, she brushed her teeth, washed her face then got dressed for school. Since she was early, for once, she decided to go to the cafeteria and get something to eat. Only a little bit, though, because she hardly ever ate breakfast.

When she got there, she grabbed a glass of milk and a green apple and looked around for a place to sit when she noticed an almost dozing Reid and Tyler sitting at one of the tables. Grinning, she made her way over to them, and watched as Tyler looked up then shot her a warm smile.

"Morning, boys," she greeted, cheerfully as she dropped down next to Reid. Tyler returned her greeting with equal good humour, but Reid just grunted and glared blearily at her.

"Crawford, don't disappoint me now. Don't tell me you're some sick morning person like the baby-man here."

"Hardly," Taine snorted. "You saw how I was, yesterday. I'm just well rested, today, and I've been up for awhile. And have actually developed a sense of humour."

"How novel," Reid muttered, drolly, and Taine poked her tongue out at him. Tyler tried to muffle his laugh with a cough, but it only made him sound like he was choking while laughing. Taine giggled a little herself as she bit into the apple. Mmm, crunchy, just how she liked 'em. Munching greedily into the apple, she nonetheless surveyed the boys curiously before another thing occurred to her, something of very big import. Her gaze sharpened and narrowed on Reid.

"Garwin, my car –"

"Is safe and sound, geez," Reid groaned as he burrowed his head into his folded arms. "What is with you and your trust issues? It's parked in the lot outside. You can go visit your baby later. But could you please just shut up and let me catch some Zs?"

"Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed," she teased, her good humour returned now that she knew her car was fine. Well, knew as much as she could trust Reid, anyway, but she somehow found herself doing so. Pogue had said that Reid was a good driver. Besides, if he did hurt Sebastian, she could deliver the smack down on him later.

"That would imply that he actually slept," Tyler said, dryly. Taine's eyebrow rose slowly as she turned to stare at Reid. He just ignored them and attempted to get some sleep, to no avail. Taine poked him in the side, and she had to stifle a laugh as he let out a very unmanly yelp, grasping his side. Well, well, well, how interesting. It seemed as though Reid Garwin had a weakness: he was ticklish. She smiled wickedly. He saw her expression and let his head drop back to his arms with a pitiful whimper.

"Could we do this after I've had some rest?"

"Whatever you say, Garwin," Taine replied, shrugging easily. Like she'd listen to that. She was just about to go into full tickle mode when Sarah dropped down beside her, carrying a bowl of cereal and a glass of orange juice. She looked at the now pouting Taine, undisturbed Reid and a snickering Tyler with a raised eyebrow. Her look clearly stated 'am I missing something'. Taine just shrugged mentally and beamed at the girl.

"Mornin' Sarah," she drawled out in a Southern accent. Sarah's eyebrow just inched up higher and Taine snickered as she snagged Reid's uneaten toast. She made a face. Ew, cold. But she continued eating it, anyway. Peanut butter and jelly, yum.

"What's with the Southern Belle?" Sarah asked, and Taine laughed as she wiped her thumb over the corner of her mouth to get some errant PB&J, then popped it into her mouth.

"Sorry, I had to put on the accent for a drama exam in my old school. It habitually comes back a few times in a month. For absolutely no reason."

"And of course it absolutely has no reason whatsoever with the fact that you like to annoy people, oh no," Reid muttered. Taine raised an eyebrow, and a wicked smile bloomed on her face. Oh he so asked for that one.

"Are you implying that I'm annoying, Garwin?"

"Who's implying anything?" he snorted, as he looked up at her. And yelped as she tackled him and started tickling him unmercifully. "Jesus, Crawford, get off me."

"Not until you say 'uncle'," she threatened. Reid was trying to slap at her hands, but he was entirely unsuccessful, seeing as how he was giggling. Yes, giggling. Sure, it was manlier than her giggle, but a giggle was a giggle. She couldn't believe it, she was laughing her own ass off. Sarah just sighed and shook her head, eating her cereal, but a grin tugged at her lips. Tyler was openly laughing at his friends' antics. Reid was wriggling around on the bench when he slipped. He landed on the ground with an audible thud as they stared at him. He propped himself up on an elbow and glared at Taine.

"Ow."

"Oh god, are you okay?" she cried out, jumping off the bench to kneel at his side. He shot her a pissed off look that blatantly read 'what do you think'. She winced as she helped him up and looked him over. "I'm sorry," she said, quietly. "Are you hurt?"

"Only my pride," he admitted, grudgingly. She helped him back on his seat, but he winced when he sat down. "Okay, maybe not just my pride, but mostly that."

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make you fall," she apologised again, sombrely. He cracked a grin at her, looking slightly amused at her downcast and guilt ridden expression.

"I didn't think you did," he said, dryly. He slung a companionable arm around her shoulder. "Lighten up, Crawford, it isn't a big deal." She smiled hesitantly at him, and he tsked. "Seriously, Crawford. Cheer up. You exploited my weakness, made me fall down and hurt my ass on the floor. Big deal." She winced at the words, and he openly laughed. His arm tightened around her to pull her more snugly against his side in a hug. "Man, you're a trip. Mouthy and sassy one minute, and contrite and shy at the next. It's cool, alright? We friends?"

"Yeah," she smiled warmly and shyly at him. "Friends."

"Well, friends," Tyler said, as he checked his watch. "We need to be making a move on or we'll be late for Math." Reid groaned and flicked a torn off piece of crust at his best friend. Taine laughed but got up as they did. She didn't even think anything of the fact that Reid still had his arm around her shoulders; it was just a friendly gesture and weird as it was, she was already so comfortable around him, and the rest. They became friends quickly enough, but they just gelled. Something about the group put her completely at ease, and made her old self come out to the surface as opposed to the Shadow!Taine that she'd been in Spencer so far. She forgot how much she missed true human companionship.

As they went to class, they almost bumped into Kate, who was walking with some girl that they all vaguely recognised. When Kate saw them, her eyes flashed, especially as she saw the comfortable way Reid's arm rested around Taine's shoulders. She looked angry, all of a sudden.

"What, one Son of Ipswich isn't enough for you?" she asked, snidely. Taine actually blanched. Sarah gasped and Reid… Reid was practically vibrating with anger. She had to wrap an arm around his waist to hold him back. Then she let him go, shrugged his arm off her shoulders and stepped up close to Kate, her eyes furious.

"I don't like what you're insinuating," she said, her tone chilly and at its most British. Kate raised a perfectly arched eyebrow, looking haughtily down her nose at Taine. Well, as much as she could, anyway, since Taine was taller than the other girl. It was times like this that she blessed her genes.

"If you think I'm insinuating, then you aren't as smart as you think you are." Taine's eyes got even colder. Oh, she really wasn't liking Kate Tunney, right now. The nerve of the girl! Taine knew she was jealous because of the little show that she and Pogue put on the night before, but what a hypocrite. Kate broke up with Pogue, so it was her fault that they were over. And she really needed to handle her possessiveness, especially since Pogue wasn't hers to be possessive of, anymore.

"We're just friends, Tunney," she said, voice quiet, but filled with absolute condescension. "It's this concept that you don't seem to understand. But I'm sure there's a dictionary lying around somewhere that can fill you in." She turned around to walk into the classroom, but Kate's hand was suddenly on her arm, whirling her around to meet the livid face of the darker girl. Kate glared at her.

"Stay away from Pogue." Taine laughed, a low, rich sound that was equal parts amusement and taunting.

"Oh you're too much, you know that?" She raised an eyebrow at the other girl. "Pogue isn't yours anymore. You have no hold on his life. So I suggest you shove off and mind your own business and let him get on with his life. And I suggest that you get your hand off my arm right now."

"Or you'll do what?" Kate challenged. Taine stepped close to the girl, gripped her wrist with her free hand and squeezed. She felt a chilling smile curve her lips, and she knew the look was scary. Knew it because she'd seen the reaction on other people's faces before, knew it because she saw apprehension on Kate's face as her fingers spasmed on Taine's arm. She leaned in close so that her lips were close to Kate's ear, almost brushing it.

"You don't want to find out, Kate," she whispered softly, as her fingers tightened. "You really don't want to know." With that she yanked the other girl's hand off her arm, dropped it contemptuously and stalked into the classroom. She ignored the others as she flung herself into a chair next to Pogue. Sarah, Tyler and Reid walked in a few moments later, Sarah sliding into a chair next to Caleb and turning around to shoot Taine an apologetic and confused look. Reid grabbed the chair next to Taine and Tyler sat next to him. The two boys looked at her questioningly, and their actions made Pogue raise an eyebrow and turn to her as well.

"I don't want to talk about it," she answered their silent question, tersely. She grabbed her bag and yanked out the necessary equipment before she turned to face the professor. She was still fuming, still so angry. She couldn't believe what Kate was trying to say. She had no right, absolutely no right to suggest what she did about Taine. She knew nothing about her, didn't know her past, her character. Sure, she wasn't the most stiff, unsociable person, and sure she'd been around, done things. But she would never, never – Taine broke off from that train of thought when she heard her pen creaking dangerously. She realised that she had a grip on it that was so tight that her knuckles were white and her pen was on the point of breaking. The boys looked alarmed, and she looked away to hide her face.

She had to stop this; she couldn't let Kate get to her. She sucked in a breath and tried to count to ten, then backwards. She had to pull herself together; she couldn't let the girl stir her up like that. She wouldn't give Kate the pleasure. But the truth was there was another reason to her anger. She was unnerved by the fact that someone who didn't know her at all could be so petty, so spiteful. So deliberately cruel. Sure, she'd gotten grief from people before, but she at least had known them, and they knew her. And another part of that was because in some small way she felt guilty.

She had to face it, she got the fluttery feelings when Reid played around with her, but then again, she got it with all of the boys. Even Tyler, although with Ty it was softer, more affectionate. He was too cute and too sweet for her to get serious belly rumblings about. Besides, she knew she could probably break him, and that had never turned her on. She liked guys who could fight back. And sure, Caleb was Sarah's guy and she would never go there, but it didn't mean she didn't feel blush-y when he was being his usual charming self. He was too hot for her to be unaffected.

Taine liked to flirt, she wouldn't deny that, and she lived in the grey side of life enough, was realistic enough, to know that you could have feelings for more than one person at a time and what mattered was which person you had more feelings about. And just because she was affected by Caleb, Reid and Pogue didn't mean she would try and get with them! Taine liked that feeling you got in a crush: that tightening of the belly, the adrenalin, the agonising 'does he or doesn't he' questioning, the euphoria at some sign of like on the guy's part, even the absolute despair when said guy didn't call or didn't appear to like her back. If there was one thing she was addicted to, it was that, that feeling of having a crush.

She wanted a cigarette after that little showdown, and she found another reason not to like Kate. She'd been trying to quit. Now her fingers itched for the feel of a cigarette. She curled her fingers into her palm, feeling her nails digging into the flesh. She concentrated on it, letting all the broiled emotions be brought to the surface, let her dissatisfaction, her anger, her guilt, her shame, everything be brought forward so her body was tense as a bow. Then she let out a breath and allowed the tension to seep out with it. Her stiff shoulders slumped and her head dropped forward slightly. She almost jumped when she felt Pogue's fingers gentle on her arm.

"You okay?" he whispered, concern in his eyes. She smiled, tiredly and nodded. Then she shrugged helplessly. All the good feeling of the morning was gone, and she just felt so immensely frustrated.

"I will be," she assured him in a low tone. Then she turned to see Tyler give her a comforting smile, reaching around Reid to squeeze her hand reassuringly. Reid, though. Reid just looked at her, a long, hard look that she just couldn't read. She felt a bit worried, what if her performance out there made him want to retract his offer of friendship? She suddenly felt that lost, shy little girl she had been rise to the surface, panic clawing at her. She'd gotten so attached already. She couldn't bear the thought that she'd never talk to Reid again, would never joke around with him, trade insults and pithy comments with him, never fight for the last fry with him, never try to tickle him in the mornings, never have his arm resting comfortably on her shoulders again.

Then an even more awful thought occurred to her. What if Sarah, Reid and Tyler told Pogue and Caleb about what happened and they decided they didn't like her anymore? The panic went up twofold and she had to control her breathing before she hyperventilated. Her eyes hadn't left his, grey on blue and she used it to fight for breath. She fought back the insecurity, the paranoia, the panic. She was filled with disgust at herself. She hated the person she'd been, before. She didn't want to go back to that, to her. She'd fought so long to become more confident, to be more comfortable in her own skin, she didn't want to ruin that now. She would not let herself fall because of this. She could live, if the guys were gone, she'd deal. She'd dealt before. She'd make new friends, it wasn't a big deal. But even as she thought about that, she knew it was a lie. They were Grade-A friends, she could already tell, and losing them would be a huge blow. But she knew she would deal. But why would she have to?

Reid must have seen the fleeting emotions in her eyes because he frowned, then he shook his head. A smile finally curved his lips and then he turned back to face the professor. She almost jumped when she felt his arm rest casually on the back of her seat and just like that her day brightened. She saw him looking at her from the corner of his eyes, a smirk lingering on his mouth. His hand came to her shoulder to squeeze reassuringly before dropping once again. It was okay. She grinned and took his example and paid attention to the professor… and completely missed the frown Pogue shot at her and Reid, and specifically at what he'd just witnessed.

He didn't like it. Pogue gripped his pen, mouth grim, eyes set forward. He didn't like it one little bit. He didn't like the locking of eyes that Taine and Reid had been doing, he didn't like the fact that a smile from Reid had gotten her to relax out of the tense state she had been in. He didn't like the arm that Reid had rested on the back of her chair, and didn't like the fact that he had squeezed her shoulder. In fact, he really didn't like the situation between Reid and Taine. As soon as the thought came, Pogue scowled.

Why the hell do I even care? He questioned himself, irritably. I've established that I'm just… attached to her because of a rebound. It's way too soon after Kate for me to even be thinking about liking someone else. Besides, Reid's single, he's a good guy, despite the shit he gets into and they get along. She's possibly good for him. He wouldn't think about the fact that the thought of Reid and Taine left a bad taste in his mouth.

He'd just thought… he remembered last night so clearly. Her concern over him, her protectiveness, her kindness. How she'd tried to cheer him up by dancing with him, and what a dance. He'd never felt freer off his bike. Then when seeing Kate had ruined that, she had gotten them out of there. He remembered her worry for her car, her somehow attractive eccentricities. He remembered the feel of her behind him, holding on loosely, then when he'd taken off quickly how she'd clung on, then held on tighter for revenge. And finally, finally he remembered her laugh as her body relaxed into the ride, the pure enjoyment, exhilaration and joy in her eyes when she'd whipped off the helmet later on. And he remembered the feel of her hair between his fingers, like warm, living silk. And the feel of her skin. The way her eyes had gone large and dark, how her lips had parted slightly.

He'd been so close to kissing her, that night. So close. But then she'd woken him up with her 'what are you doing' and he'd backed off. So maybe he'd been reading the signals wrong and she wasn't actually interested in him in that way. Maybe she was just doing it to help him out, as a friend would. His gut clenched as he imagined her doing the same for Reid, imagined Reid seeing her eyes darken from light grey to dark grey. Imagined Reid dancing with her like they had danced together last night. Oh no, he didn't like that, not one bit.

He turned his head subtly to look at her. She was gorgeous. He couldn't understand why no one had noticed her before, why some other guy hadn't snapped her up or something. Then again, he wondered why he hadn't noticed her before, or why Reid hadn't. Of course, he didn't know. Maybe some guy, or even guys, had asked her out. Maybe. She was tall, almost 5'11" tall, long, slender but she had curves where it counted. Her dark hair was naturally streaked almost gold by the sun. Her skin was golden tanned, and he knew that it was at least in part natural. She looked like she had some Spanish in her blood or something like that. But it was her eyes that drew him in. They were unusual, a grey so light that it was almost mercurial. They were slightly tilted at the side, and reminded him of a wolf's. It was startling against her complexion.

But it wasn't just her looks that drew him in, although she packed quite a punch. Taine had been lucky in her genes. It was her sarcasm, her tendency towards being a smart-aleck. Her loyalty, her cunning. Her joy in freedom, her ability to let everything go and just enjoy herself. Most of all, it was just how comfortable he felt around her, like he'd known her his whole life. And it was that that worried him the most. He was getting way too attached, too fast. He had to stop it. He'd be friends with her, but he wasn't prepared to be anything more.

The fear that had gripped him when Chase had hurt Kate was still too fresh, the wounds of his break up with her too strong. He didn't want anyone to ever make him feel like that, didn't want to feel that worthless ever again. And more, it was how betrayed he felt by Kate. He had risked his life trying to get to her, fighting Chase, but she'd just tossed him aside like so much garbage. And yeah, while he knew now that it had been stupid, it didn't detract from the fact that he'd done it. Of course, she didn't know, would never know, now. He nearly shuddered when he thought about how close he had been to sharing with her his secret, of breaking the Covenant for her. He was glad, now, that he hadn't.

Pogue glanced surreptitiously at Taine again and wished he hadn't. He scowled when he noticed that Reid's arm was still resting on her chair. Worse off, he was now playing with the ends of her hair. True, Taine seemed distracted by the class and kept hitting his hand irritably, but Reid was still doing it. It was such an intimate thing to do that it set his teeth on edge. Okay, this wasn't a good sign, there was no way he could be jealous of his 'brother', and of Reid of all people. He knew and understood jealousy for Caleb very well, he who was smarter, who was in charge, more power, older. There was nothing about Reid that he had to be jealous of. Except, of course, of the fact that he seemed so close to Taine. Pogue envied Reid in that moment, envied the easy way he had with people, his brash personality that made him always included into a group, whether they realised it (or wanted it) or not.

Taine noticed him looking and turned around. She looked questioningly at him, but he just brushed it aside with a small smile. She returned it before she went back to making notes. He sighed internally and turned to his own work. He needed her out of his head, he needed her out of his system, and those needs contrasted with a greater need to be around her more. Right now, he didn't know what to do but he found himself equally disappointed and glad that they had different classes, next. He wondered idly what had happened to make her so tense before class, though.

The day went past fairly uneventfully. She'd had fun, as all of her classes contained at least one of her new friends. After Math, Reid had actually congratulated her and told her he'd have to crown her official badass, now. She's just smirked. Reid somehow always knew the perfect thing to say to her, it was scary how alike they were in some ways. It was also kind of scary how close she was getting to Reid. She and Sarah too had bonded over being the only two girls of the group that had adopted them, Caleb she was kind of in awe of, Tyler was, as Reid frequently called him, the baby. She felt great sisterly feelings for Tyler that surpassed her own closeness to her half-brother. But then again, Eric was nearly seven years older than her and lived far away. She was close to him, sure, but she and Ty had that friends thing going on while she and Eric were siblings, full stop.

Pogue, though. Pogue she was confused about. Of all the Sons, he was the one who created the biggest butterflies for her, and also the one her head was screaming frantically to get away from. He was just too much like Søren, and not just in interest and dress-sense. Well, no one could quite be like Søren in dress sense. He was original in that respect. What Søren wore always made him stand out, if being 6'4" didn't make him stand out even more. He was her Adonis; her laughing, blond haired, green eyed, wicked other half. She and Søren had fitted so well, so seamlessly that it had been like some part of her was missing when they broke up. Hell, even now she felt that emptiness where Søren used to fill.

But their similarities… It was in the way they commanded attention, even if they didn't realise it. It was in their charisma, the thing that made everyone feel it when they stepped into a room. It was the utter love they had about riding, about speed, that danger and euphoria and the close brush with death. It was in their eyes, a secret that she longed to find out, a hidden hurt buried deep inside, something that called out to her. It was so seductive, calling her name and bidding that she come. It was maddening. It was in the utter sex that their voices dripped, even when they didn't notice, the low husky timbre of it that ran over her skin like velvet and made her shiver. The mysterious quirk of their lips, that look in their eyes when they were talking to you, yet seeming slightly detached. 'The alpha male', Taine concluded with a sigh. Oh yes, she had a thing for the alpha male, a very big thing. It was just that she was so strong willed herself that she needed the strength pitted against hers. It was what her relationship had been like with Søren, a battle of wills and wit. She'd enjoyed it, craved it, and the sudden lack of it disturbed her, unnerved her, made her feel unfulfilled.

Taine sighed as she dropped down face first on her bed. She needed to get over Søren. As much as she loved him, as good as their relationship was, it was over. Three years of her life she'd been with him. A tumultuous three years with ups and downs, sure, but they were a good three years. And he broke her heart.

It wasn't through any fault of his own, she would be the first to admit it, but she couldn't help but feel anger and sadness, anyway. And betrayal. Søren hadn't taken the news of her leaving very well and while she wanted their relationship to continue, it was Søren who was the voice of reason. Perhaps that was the reason why she felt she couldn't forgive him. Perhaps it was that why she felt so hurt. She who was so practical had wanted the impossible. She had devised of ways for them to be with each other, for them to stay together, going as far as to say that she'd defy her parents to stay in England with him when he had told her, gently but firmly, that she had to go. That he loved her, but he couldn't see her throw away her life for him. And when she'd begged him to stay with her, to let her cling to their relationship at least he had again been the voice of reason. She remembered that night all too well.

"Stay with me," she begged. Søren was standing by the window, his back to her, looking out at the street and passing cars. His back was stiff, and it hurt her, hurt her so much to see him there and not even look at his face. 'Why isn't he looking at me?' she wondered, wildly. 'Why won't he let me look him?' When he finally answered her, he still had his back turned away.

"I can't, Taine," he said, voice low and rough with emotion. "You know I can't. As much as I want to, as much as I would love to it's the one thing I can't give to you, sweetheart. I've said that I'd give heaven and earth to you if I could, but this is it. This is earth, this is life. You have to go."

"But I don't want to," her voice broke on a sob as she walked to him, wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her face in his back and smelling that scent that was just Søren. "I don't… what am I going to do, Soar? What can I do? I love you, I don't want to…Please, please." She fisted his soft, worn old t-shirt in her hands, soaking the material with her tears. He didn't even touch her, didn't move except to tense further. She didn't understand, couldn't understand why he was being like this, acting so cold and sounding like his heart was breaking.

"Your parents have to move back to American," he reminded her. "Your family needs you, all of you. Your grandfather's dying. Don't you want to go and see him?"

"Of course I do! But it doesn't mean that I want to stay there forever, especially when he's gone. I understand why they have to go, but why me? What do I have to do with it?" she cried out. "Why won't they let me stay here? Why can't I just take a leave of absence from school for a little while and return? It's my last year, why do they have to uproot me now?"

"I don't know," he admitted. He finally turned around and wrapped his arms around her. "I don't know, and I can't do anything about it. But you will be fine, love. You'll live. You'll get there and you'll hurt but in the end you'll move on because you're you. You're so strong, Taine, give your strength a chance."

"I don't want to leave you," she whispered, achingly. He looked at her and she swore that his gorgeous green eyes were wet, but then he closed his eyes and blocked that view from her. When he opened them again, they were dry, painfully dry while hers were so wet.

"It tears me up inside when I think of losing you," he admitted, sighing. "You've been with me for three glorious years and to have you leave is to have part of me gone with you." He laughed suddenly, bitterly. "Listen to me. God, I sound like an utter prat."

"Oh Soar," she said, laughing tearfully. "What are we going to do?" She clung on to him for dear life and he held on to her just as tightly before he let her go. Stepping back, he cupped her face and kissed her fiercely. When he pulled back, his expression was just as fierce.

"I love you, Taine, but I can't be with you. Not when you're leaving." He smiled sadly, kissing her forehead. "Think of me fondly. And forgive me." With that, he let her go and walked away. Taine let out an anguished cry as she watched him leave hoping, wishing that he would turn around that her parents would come in with him and shout 'surprise' and tell her it was all an elaborate hoax. But he didn't come back and the soft click of the door closing sounded like a gunshot to her ears. She dropped bonelessly to her knees, not even noticing the tears that fell in a steady stream down her face.

She never saw him again. He cut himself out of her life so much so that their mutual friends became uncomfortable with their situation. They had all tried to cheer her up, throwing her parties, taking her out, but not he. He never once turned up, even when all their friends did. And she left with a broken heart and in steadily more depressed state. But he was right. She'd moved on, she'd recovered. But she still couldn't find it in her heart to forgive him, even while she knew he was right. She had been ready to give everything up, so ready to hurt her family but he wouldn't hear of it.

"What do you think this will do to your parents?" he demanded, angrily. "They love you so much, they've worked for you so hard and this is how you're going to repay them? Taine, you can't do this, you'll ruin your whole life."

"You gave up school."

"And it's the one thing I've regretted the most, next to losing you. But what I did was necessary. There were other things going on at the time that I couldn't ignore, just as you can't ignore this. You can't live in your little fantasy world, Taine. The real world is out there and it's calling for you. You have this life that's wonderful and you can't just give it all up. Taine, please be reasonable. What are you going to do? What will you do about money? Lord knows I can't support you. You have no family here. And I know your family's richer than Croesus, but do you really think your parents will fund your trip into Fantasy-land?"

"How can you be so cruel?" she cried out, whirling around to face him. "I'm doing this for us. I'm thinking of you and me, how can you tell me that I have to leave? Don't you love me?"

"Don't," he said, dangerously. "Don't you even say that. Don't you dare try to win with that argument. You know I love you, that's why I'm trying to make you see sense."

"Maybe it's you that needs to see sense," she retorted. "Søren, I can't function without you. I can't do this. I can't leave you, leave this. I've been running from things my whole life, I've been forced to uproot myself too many times in the past and I am not prepared to do it again."

"It's for your own good!" he shouted. "It's for your family. Good god, your grandfather's dying and all you can think about is staying with me?" She looked like she'd been slapped.

"How dare you," she whispered. "How dare you say that to me."

"I just want you to think," he smiled sadly. "I just want what's best for you. Isn't that what people in love are supposed to do?"

"Then find me a way to stay here!" she said, angrily. "Help me convince my parents that I'm needed here, that I can't leave now. Søren, please. How can you say that this is what's best for me?"

"You need to be with your family, Taine," he said, softly. "I'm crazy about you, but what we have? How can it possibly be more important than your own flesh and blood? You're only eighteen."

"Flesh and blood?" she raised an eyebrow. Then she raised her hand, showing him the scar on her palm. "What the hell do you call this, then? What do you call sharing your blood with me two years ago? What do you call last night?"

"A foolish, childish act and sex," he said, bluntly. "They're your parents. Your mother and your father. Your grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins and god knows what else."

"How can you say that we don't matter?" she cried out. "What were these past three years to you, then? A way to pass time? Have you used me as a buffer against your fan girls?" He looked angry, stalking to her and grabbing her arm.

"That isn't true and you know it. Stop being childish."

"Childish, eh?" Her chin went up. "Well then, I guess I'm just not cut out for playing with the big boys." With that, she stalked out the room.

"Taine. Taine!" She ignored him and kept on walking.

Thinking about it now, she knew that she had been childish to act in such a way, to treat him as she did but she had been filled with such ire and indignation and fuelled with panic at the thought of losing him. It had seemed like the whole world was against them and to her horror, he seemed to be against them as well. God, but they were dramatic. Thinking about her behaviour now made her wince in embarrassment, but Søren had always been the one who could make her lose her cool. It had always been so and while in the beginning it had unnerved and annoyed her, it had been the one thing that had made her love him so much in the end.

There were other things, though. Now that she was alone and in Spencer, she wondered ironically why her parents had sent her to boarding school if they wanted her to be with family. Søren's argument was completely moot point, now, but it was over. It was done and she found herself acting more like how she used to, found herself relaxing and yes, moving on. But the memory of him still struck her deep. It was the little things, the way the morning sun streaming through the window would light up his blond hair while he was sleeping, highlighting the high cheekbones, the full lips. How his eyes lit up after a ride on his bike and he would laugh that sexy low, free laugh right after. She remembered how he lost himself in his music; how his eyes would close as he gripped the mic, sweat beading above his upper lip from the hot stage lights. How he'd wink and tease at the audience, then would look at her, directly at her, and sing. How he'd sign autographs and flirt, then when she came he would drop everything and sling and arm around her waist and kiss her, still full of exhilaration over the performance.

Søren's life had consisted of four things: his bike, his music, his mother and her. Not necessarily in that order, but that was how it was and she had always known it. She remembered sitting in dark, dingy pubs and bars and watching him in those tenuous first years of his career. A career that had found minor success, but he was never satisfied with minor. He was working so hard to make it into a great success and she knew it would come to him one day, and not just because she was biased. She knew it because it was Søren and his dedication, his drive, his ambition, his talent and his charm would get him through.

Turning around, she picked up her diary from the bedside table and flipped through the pages until she reached it. She took the picture out, her thumb brushing gently over the image. It was taken before she found out she was leaving, after one of his gigs. Richard had taken the picture and it was of the two of them, him in his customary black leather jacket despite the coldness and she wrapped up in a big grey coat. They had their arms around each other, their faces highlighted by the streetlamp they were standing under. They were both looking at each other, laughing, under the light drizzle of a London spring night, and such light heartedness and love jumped out.

She felt a lump come to her throat as she looked at the picture, one of only a few that she kept. She put it down gently before turning to another page where a picture was glued. His twenty-first birthday party. She had dressed up as a school girl as a joke, but had rolled up the skirt of her uniform so that it was indecently short, and unbuttoned her shirt to right between her breasts. Her hair was in pigtails and she had put on a pair of glasses, a lollipop in her mouth. She was sitting on Søren's lap, and he was wearing the gag gift she had given him, which was a white haired wig and a beard. He was leering at her cleavage and she was giving a look of mock surprise, her hand at her mouth in a fake gasp, right at the camera.

The next page was a picture of them last summer. He sitting against a tree in Royal Kensington Gardens, a cigarette between his fingers, and she was sleeping, her head on his lap. His free hand was tangled in her hair and he had a look of such tenderness on his face as he looked down at her that she felt the lump growing bigger, and the threat of tears. She quickly turned the page. Paul's house party. Richard had taken the picture as a gag while they were sleeping; she curled up on Søren's chest on Paul's bed, the duvet covering her up. But as one of her arms was curled over Søren's stomach, it was obvious that she was very much not dressed. One of his arms was around her shoulders; his other hand was on hers on his stomach. It was a picture of such peace and contentment. Paul even had her in his phone under Mrs. Søren, to her everlasting ire. But he'd then laughingly showed her that Søren had been changed to Mrs. Taine. Mrs. They'd all then laughed at her confused expression and said they knew who wore the pants in the relationship. At Søren's bemused expression, Richard and pretended to crack a whip, which had them all going again.

God, she missed them so much. With a sigh, Taine forced herself to close her diary and to put it away in the drawer. It was not the time for reminiscing. It was over, now, and there was nothing she could do about it except move on. She had to, her sanity depended on it. So she went to the bathroom and started to get ready. Reid had invited her to Nicky's again, that night, and she was determined to enjoy herself, and determined to forget her problems if only for just one night. When she left, she didn't notice her GMail page automatically refreshing to add a new email.

Søren Gardner: Taine, don't delete this before you read it.

tbc…

Thanks to my reviewers: Mrs. St. John Allerdyce, sunshine-48, Babaksmiles, LiasonFan2, PensiveGal88, TheWinterWolf, little miss michelle and greyhaven11. Thanks for your encouragement, your kind words about the story and also I'm SO glad you guys like Taine.

And in answer to a question from PensiveGal88: I haven't thought about who to use as Taine, it's an ongoing process. But I'm thinking either Isabelli Fontana or Alessandra Ambrosio. If you don't know who they are, they're Victoria's Secret models and just absolutely gorgeous. Hmm Kristin Kreuk could possibly work, as she is exotic looking, but I have a personal bias against her, and Shiri Appleby is always Liz Parker to me, you know? Far too delicate for Taine, methinks. But thanks for the suggestions.

Babaksmiles: Oh, the beautiful and wicked Søren… perhaps. We'll have to see but I do adore Søren. I created his character for an original piece of fiction and utterly fell in love with him and his outrageous sense of style. He's nicer in the other story, but bad boy all the way, too. And yes, I agree. There would definitely be HUGE drama if he turned up. And you wanted to know more about what Taine looks like, so I put in more description of her. And more of Søren. grin