HEYZ EVERYBODEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH! Sorry this is so late... I came back from the Czeck Republic a few days ago, I was in Bro. IT WAS COOL! All the delicious architecture... . and the parcs of the palaces... The Vranov Palace by the Thaya was MAGNIFICENT! And the Austerlitz battle field was amazing...

OOOOooooooooookay stop dreaming and whining and drooling over a peice of land that's about 120 km from here... ON WITH THE FIC!

and please enjoy it... >.

Chapter IX: DinDin Wivv Consequences (Dinner with Cinsequences for the smart pple...)
Yes, you were absolutely right. She thought of –censored-ing him on the spot. One could practically see the flying pink ribbons and pink S&M gear flying all over her head. Stupid pink freaky thing with stupid none-existent brain. Tch.

-ahem- back to our story – They were about to fall off their chairs, drop on their knees and let out a dramatic "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" when they heard the banging of a pair of doors and the loud irritating voice of Mariah, and seeing her disgusting face expression, they understood that she was thinking thoughts only they were allowed to (possessive eh?) and lounged across the table to carry our Precious Pet off to the other side of the palace.

They were so much in a hurry they didn't notice Drigger leaping along with them, playing bodyguard with his three Admirers (more like Obsessors) behind them, their main gaol: protect innocent Kitty from Uber-obsessive Freak aka Mariah. They all leaped and jumped from wall, to furniture, to wall, until they saw the labyrinth (Voltaire thought it funny to build a labyrinth for his hide-and-seek game, which was more of hide-I'll-find-you-and-molest-you-when-I-did, and got lost in there instead of achieving his Master Plan of Molestation. Really funny sequence. If I get enough reviews I might even write it. Now, as everyone knew he couldn't spend three seconds in there without getting lost, they used as their sanctuary.). They hurried to the centre of the labyrinth, where they deposed him on the marble bench underneath the huge roof thingy they have in nice gardens (I have no idea what they are called… sry! nn).

"Did –puff- we lose –hah- that cursed –hah- cursed piece of crap? –pant-"

"I –hah- think so –puff- -pant-"

"I think that –hah- glasses gurl –hah- what was her name?"

"Emily… -aaargh…-"

"Yeah Emily… I think she got her…"

"Thank God for Emily! What would we do without her!"

Thank god for Emily indeed. While Rei was watching the others sprawl themselves in a rather ridiculous way, and thinking sadly about his wasted food, Emily was taking care of the over-due kindergarten in the Dining hall number 14.

When Mariah stormed in screaming her ear-murdering voice out, Emily was quick in her actions; when she saw Rei grabbed and carried away to The Safe Place (the labyrinth is the only place in the palace Voltaire was afraid to go into, besides the Girls' toilet), she took out a stun gun and shot Voltaire before he could get any crazy idea about going after his grand son three times, did the same thing to Boris (whose face fell in his pasta as he was about to declare war to the non existent peas on his plate), then took out a bazooka-like thing, aimed it and shot at Mariah, who dodged and took out her own piece of over dimensional equipment and shot back.

Voltaire could do nothing but sit back, unable to move, as he saw how his two (and only) female staff blasted the place and each other, dodging and throwing whatever they could grab out of no where in this fictive world of Fan fictions (which was every thing). Over-dimensional object after over-dimensional object appeared, annihilating, destroying, terminating the existence of anything the ammunition got to touch.

"Aaaah yes, what an entertaining dinner it is" Voltaire thought, sighing in his head, watching the scene of utter destruction before him. Oh well, why not take advantage of this and watch a free show full of violence instead of paying 12 euros for a cinema ticket for a movie that's only rated R. This was sooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better.

Our beloved Rei-rescuers and our beloved Rei-himself lounged about in the labyrinth, watching the huge hedges of grass rustle at the light touch of little animals and insects that promenaded through them, listening to the artificial sound of wind that they all bugged Voltaire to buy for them, relaxing and thinking about anything else that wasn't concerning their troublesome lives. Rei and Drigger sat under opposite trees, each having their Stalkers at their feet, lying and dozing off to their World of Wonderful Dreams.

Drigger was thinking about how cute Rei was and thinking of ways to protect such an epitome of innocence from sex-driven idiots, and how NOT right it was that said sex-driven idiots were lying at his feet, smiling goofily. He was ignoring his Pets (1) that were at his feet drooling at him thinking the most (in) appropriate thoughts (cx)

Rei was looking up at the tree he was sitting under, and thinking about how yummy the fruits looked that were above him. 'mmmm… apples…' he thought. He didn't notice Drigger's watchful gaze, not did he notice the drool coming out of his mouth cutely (he does everything cutely. Basta.), nor did he catch how hungrily his Pets (1) were staring at him, or how their eyes glazed as they raked his unsuspecting and chaste body and the thin line of drool dribbling down his chin, making up in their own horrid minds what Rei-Rei could be thinking about. Oh my, I have really turned them into sex fiends, have I? (A/N: WHO WANTS ONE!)

Kai didn't notice the dark aura emanating from the opposite tree, nor did Bryan or Tala. They just sat there, looking at the appetizing neck and lips, body and every thing that came with Rei. They didn't notice how they inched closer, second by second, not being able to control their bodies. The next few moments ran by like a blur. It sort of went like this:

-Kai, Tala & Bryan thoughts-

Holy shit, what a hot kitten! A forbidden fruit under a forbidden fruit tree… (He's under an apple tree.) Look at those eyes, those legs, that chest… awww, would you look at that; a pink nipple! Mmmm, -drool- how would that taste? Wait! He's shifting his legs! –whistle- geez, I wonder how far can they spread? Yes, yes, spread them a little, a bit more, a bit more – what? No, don't close! Tch; you just had to cross your legs, didn't you? Awww, so cute, never can stay angry at you! Ooo, what delicious shoulders, I could just –bite- into them, and your neck! Gosh, a beautiful swan neck, and those lips! Sinful, full plump pink lips, how soft they look… and those hands, such beautiful long fingered hands, what could those do to me… -mega drool in a bucket or two-

-In reality – Drigger P.O.V.-

'Oooooh you fiends! Thinking so openly horrendous (if practical) things! I can see it from here! Anyone can see you Mega-Drool-In-A-Bucket-Or-Two and feel your disturbing thoughts anywhere within the radius of five miles! I will eliminate you and your capacity of ever reproducing yourselves, I swear I will'

-NOW MY P.O.V.!-

On queue, he stood up, sent a message of warning through his aura that hit them like a lightning bolt, and true to my words, Kai & co stood up and bolted away, being chased by a maniacal (but really cute) Drigger with a chain saw.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, CHASING US THE INHUMANE THING!"

"I AM PLAYING TAG!"

"WHAT! WITH A CHAINSAW!"

"AND PRESERVING REI-REI'S INNOCENCE!"

"WITH A CHAINSAW!"

"HELL YEAH! NOW STAND STILL!"

"HELL NO! NOT WHILE YOU HAVE A CHAINSAW!"

"AAAAARGH, I TOLD YOU IF YOU DARE TO EVEN GO CLOSE TO HIM YOU WILL BE NEUTRALISED!" (not a word, but work with me here!)

"WE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!"

"OH YEAH!"

"YEAH!"

"CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRGGGE!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"

And so they ran, back and forth, and back and forth, our three little soon-to-be-neutered boys running for their genitalia, and Drigger slicing through every thing, hedges, metal posts, hedges, the air two centimetres from their heads, hedges…

On the bench, Rei, Falborg, Wolfborg and Dranzer were passively watching the Tag game. Rei was chewing happily on the apple Dranzer gave him, sitting on Falborg's lap, the other two on either side of him. They're all Pets, so they all know the Rule of the Younger (see end chapter III), and they are in their protective-big-brother-role, so Rei is ABSOLUTELY FINE!

"So, young one, where were you before you came here?"

"I was in a pretty forest in the mountains! Over there, there is the purest water, the finest fruit, and everything is so cool!"

While the pets were chatting away about Rei's home and all, we could still hear in the back ground some other type of talking…

"WHEN I GET YOU, I WILL TIE YOU UP WITH THE ROUGHEST ROPE IN VOLTAIRE'S BASEMENT AND HANG YOU NAKED ON THE HIGHEST BRANCH IN THE GARDEN BY YOUR GENITALIA UNTIL YOU FALL OFF! GET BACK HERE!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

(1) Pets: WHAT! THEY'RE THE ONES FOLLOWING HIM LIKE PETS! >. cute ne?

Enjoy much? Well, the 'Snow white' is coming along... kinda okay... Not sure when I am done with the first chapter though,... I spend a lot more time thinking than actually writing my fics... >.> Lazy lazy but hey, I LURF MESELF ANYWHOSE! CX

And if you do too, THEN REVIEW! I am sure you dudes know how much I am waiting for... (looks at caged Voltaire-deprived Doris) You do know how he reacts to Voltaire-perfume right? kukukukhakhakhaaaaaa...

Oh and sorry about the 'action' scenes... kinda got carried away... sorry if they don't make sense... .