Sorry this chapter is so short. I just don't know if I'm going to be able to update soon so I thought I give a little something. Thanks so much for the reviews last chapter. Brooke/Nathan relationship butt here will be a lot of brucas by chapter 6…Hope you still enjoy!

Chapter 4:Because of You

Because of you, I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me

Brooke walked into the hospital room slowly, taking it all in, before actually looking working up enough courage to look at him. Even in a hospital bed, hooked up to a million IV wires, bruised and banged up, he still looked good. And that pissed her off. She would have felt a lot better if she had come in here and seen him looking like a mess. Maybe she could believe that because of her he had been a mess. She knew she had been. But it would have been nice to imagine he was upset too. She sat in the chair next to him unsure of what to say.

"Hey Nathan. It's Brooke." She began. There was so much that she wanted to tell him. About what he had done. And how much he had hurt her. But she didn't know if she could say those things out loud. Because they would feel that much more real. But maybe that was the point. Maybe if she could finally let all of her feelings out she would finally be able to let Nathan go.

"You hurt me a lot," her voice cracking at the end. She didn't even know what the hell she was saying. It was just pouring out.

"You and Peyton, and what you did. You guys really screwed me up." She had to laugh. That was an understatement.

"I feel like I lost my two best friends and I don't have anyone." By this point Brooke had reached the point of tears.

"And now I have these constant walls around me. I mean yes, I'm still open to making friends but I now have a flicker of doubt. Like there is this guy Lucas. Who is really nice and cool. And I like him. But I'm afraid to get to close." Brooke put her head in her hands and tried to hold back her tears. She needed to finish this.

"I hate you, you know that," she practically yelled at his sleepless form. Hopefully these rooms were sound proof.

"This is all your fault. If it weren't for you I would still have friends, and a home, and my life back." It was almost therapeutic doing this. Especially since he wasn't awake.

"And it's not like I could stay here anymore. I tried. After you humiliated me in front of the whole town by cheating on me. Not just cheating on me, but with my best friend."

I'm forced to fake

A smile, a laugh everyday of my life

My heart can't possibly break

When it wasn't even whole to start with

"But the thing that I hate the most is that I am so affected by the whole thing, I wish I could be one of those people who just doesn't care but I'm not. I do care. And I hate that. And…"

"Brooke?"

She turned at the sound of Nathan's voice. Crap. Did he just hear everything that she just said?

"Brooke, I'm really sorry that I hurt you." Nathan croaked, dehydrated. "But I want you to know, I made a huge mistake. I still love you Brooke."

Because of you

I am afraid

Reviews are my love…Next chapter: Gone!