A/N: another chappie!! all i can say is "wOOt!" enjoy and REVIEW!!!

How Long Is Never?

Chapter 9

"And I'm still waiting for the rain to fall

Pour real life down on me

'Cause I can't hold on

To anything this good enough

Am I good enough

For you to love me, too?

So take care what you ask me

'Cause I can't say no."

--"Good Enough", Evanescence

Before she even opened her eyes, all Starfire could think of was the awful crick she had in her neck. At last she blinked and found herself curled up on the crescent couch in the Tower's common room, her head angled uncomfortably against the arm. She frowned slightly and rubbed the sleep from her eyes, cracking her neck to one side as she pushed herself into a half-sitting position. And then something was thrust in her face that obscured her vision completely.

"Muffin?" she heard Beast Boy's voice ask, and the something came into focus, revealing that it was indeed a muffin.

She took it gingerly, noted it was blueberry, and slanted a questioning look at her teammate. "Why am I on the couch again?"

Beast Boy grinned his usual fanged grin, leaning his hands on the back of the couch. "You fell asleep, of course. Why else would you be here?" he laughed and added, "I guess we watched too many episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond."

Starfire made a sound that could have been a contained, derisive laugh. "Oh, yes. Everybody sure does love Raymond."

Beast Boy pouted. "Are you making fun of my taste in comedy?"

She rose gracefully to her feet, stretching slightly to ease the stiffness in her limbs. Tossing the muffin in the air, she caught it deftly and smirked at him. "Why, yes, I believe I am."

He looked like he was about to pout again, but then his fangs showed in the widest smile yet, and he exclaimed with obnoxious joy, "You made a joke! You're back! Just a little more sarcastic, but that's okay!" And then he quite literally threw himself at her, morphing into a small grin kitten right before he would've keeled her over.

Starfire giggled as Kitten-Beast Boy purred and nuzzled her arm. "Sorry, BB, but if you wanted any of this muffin, I'm not sharing. I'm starved."

It almost looked like the green cat pouted, but certainly that was impossible. It leapt away then, and Beast Boy stood before her once more. "So…whaddaya gonna do today? Huh? Huh?"

She shrugged, pinching a piece of muffin and popping it into her mouth. She continued eating as she meandered over to the massive windows, Beast Boy tagging along behind with an intensely curious expression on his face. Below, the ocean crashed against the rocky island, sending white foam high into the air. The water sparkled in the bright sunlight, all the waves reflecting, and she squinted against the brilliance.

"I don't know yet, BB," she finally replied, crumpling the muffin's wrapper into a ball. She frowned, just the corners of her lips pulled down, and picked at the wrapper, her eyebrows slanting together. "Honestly, I was planning on talking to Robin."

"Robin?" Beast Boy echoed, incredulous. His forest green eyes widened and his eyebrows rose so high they nearly vanished into his hair. "Why would you do that? All he does is upset you." An instant later he clapped a hand over his mouth, looking mortified that he had uttered such a thing.

But it was almost as if Starfire had not heard him; she stayed in the exact same position, picking at the wrapper in an automatic, thoughtless manner. At last she sighed and crushed the wrapper in her fist, opening her fingers hesitantly to stare at it again. "I know," she admitted quietly. "But…" she trailed off with a shake of her head. "He must know something about the sniper, and whatever TestCom is...and I'd really like this mystery to end."

"Well, yeah, we all do, but Star…" Beast Boy raked his fingers through his short hair, clearly searching for the right words. He dropped his arms in defeat, slumping against the glass. "Why did you go?"

She hardly needed him to elaborate that question; she knew exactly what he was referring to. And while she did not desire to explain her past motivations and her present feelings, she hated holding it all inside every minute of every day. She wasn't sure Beast Boy was the kind of person to spill her guts to, but he was here and he was willing to listen. And he was her friend, on top of the rest. He had something of a right to know. "Because of him," she confessed. "I left because of him."

Beast Boy shifted his weight, obviously a little uncomfortable with the direction the conversation would inevitably head, but his expression remained sincerely concerned. "Why?" he pressed.

She shook her head at nothing, staring out the window at the sky. "I…heh, it sounds so pathetic now," she said almost to herself. "I just knew that nothing would be the same after…after that day." She bowed her head, her hair slipping forward and creating an auburn curtain.

"What happened?" Beast Boy asked, not moving to see her face, respecting her privacy.

She let out a mirthless little laugh, her arms tightening across her chest, her fingers digging into her arms. "It's not so much what happened then…it's that I still…I…I…" she shook her head again and cast him a brief glance. "I still love him. And the worst part is that I've forgotten why."

Beast Boy looked completely sympathetic, even though it was clear that he had guessed that answer all along. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, gauging where to go next. "So why have you forgotten…this?"

"He's not Robin anymore. You know that," she replied, her voice somewhat wistful. "Robin was brave and kind and protective and maybe a little obsessive, but that was okay. Robin watched out for me; Robin cared about me; Robin explained everything to me, every dumb question I had. He was my best friend, and I thought…but now…" Her expression set, turning harder, almost mocking. "Now he's Nightwing. Nightwing's nothing like Robin. But I love him anyway—love the shell he's become."

"I'm sorry," Beast Boy offered lamely, unable to think of anything better.

"Don't be," Starfire whispered. "I've dug myself into this hole, and I have to get myself out." She smiled faintly. "You wouldn't happen to have a ladder, would you?"

Beast Boy chuckled and pulled her into an awkward hug. "It'll work out, dude," he said as he released her.

"Thanks, 'dude'," she teased, walking away from the window, pausing when he called after her.

"You're still going to see him?"

She nodded, brushing her longer bangs from her vision. "Have to do it sometime, don't I? Besides, I have a mystery to solve."

"Good luck with that," Beast Boy said honestly.

"Yeah," she agreed, disappearing from the common room.

TTTTT

Nightwing stared aimlessly into space, unable to keep staring at the sheets of paper laid before him on the desk. He had researched "TestCom" extensively, but he couldn't find any information that would suggest such a vendetta with a certain Tamaranian princess. In fact, all TestCom was was a computer technologies corporation located in Jump City. There was nothing insidious or shady about it—he had made sure of that. Criminal background checks on every single employee, down to the last janitor, and he still had come up empty-handed. If anything, TestCom was a convenient patsy for the assassin to name to gain freedom from the Titans. But then again, the sniper had then been packed off to jail to await his court date. So Nightwing couldn't see how that was a good thing.

And this was the kind of circular thinking that was giving him a pounding headache. The light from his one lamp was far too bright and the shadows around were far too dark, and the contrast was making his eyes hurt. He peeled off his mask and pressed his finger and thumb into his eyes, trying to massage away the tiredness. He had to find who was doing this, who had hurt Starfire, and make them pay.

No. This couldn't be about revenge. This had to be about justice.

But they hurt Starfire…

"Not like she could possibly want me anymore anyway," he grumbled, attempting to sway his vengeful thoughts. They stayed firmly in place, though, and only brought more thoughts of the one subject he had neurotically avoided—his redheaded teammate. He couldn't possibly explain to her why he had done what he had done. Or that he had never wanted "never" in the first place. And he couldn't possibly expect her to forgive him for all the horrible things he had done, for the absolute bastard he had been and still was being. She would never understand…he couldn't make her understand…

And there was a knock at the door.

He blinked at the sudden sound, starting in his chair. "Uh…who is it?"

"Starfire," came the reply.

His anxiety caused the smile to vanish from his face, and he hurriedly replaced his mask. "Come in," he said levelly, reverting back to Nightwing. He had been Robin, just for a moment there. He heard the door hiss open and light from the hallway flooded the small, dark crime lab. She stood in the doorway indecisively for a second, nothing more than a silhouette.

"Yes?" he questioned, rising slowly to his feet, his muscles sore from sitting hunched over for so long.

She stepped forward, and the door closed behind her, swallowing the room in black again. He more heard than saw her walk towards him until the lamp's light spilled across her slender form. "I was wondering about how much information you found."

"A lot of information but no leads," Nightwing answered, gesturing to his cluttered desk. "TestCom is clean. There's nothing to it except a bunch of computer geeks who fiddle around with circuit boards all day." He paused before venturing, "I have no idea why they'd want to kill you."

"Neither do I," she dryly replied, moving next to him so that she could review the evidence. In his mind, she had moved far too close…a few more inches and she would be touching him…her voice broke him out of his wandering thoughts. "So where is this place?"

"'Scuse me," he said, sitting in his chair again as she shifted out of the way. He clicked a few things on the keyboard of his high-tech laptop, calling up a map of Jump City. Enlarging the northern half with another click, he pointed at the screen. "This building, right here. That white building they put up several years back. Five, I think."

"Oh, that one? Makes me sneeze," she said with a hint of laughter in her tone.

"Really? The building makes you sneeze? Maybe you're allergic to geeks," he chuckled, amused at his own attempt at humor. It had been so long since he'd made a joke, and even longer since he'd made one in her presence. It felt good.

"Mm…if that were true, then I'd be sneezing up a storm right now," she cleverly remarked.

"Ouch," Nightwing said, unable to believe that they were having something of pleasant conversation. "That was vicious. Implying I'm a geek and all."

"It's true, though," she continued before sobering. "No, all I'm allergic to is metallic chromium. Nothing living."

"Maybe you have a cold," he suggested.

"Yeah…maybe I do," she mused half to herself.

They both stared at the glowing screen in the ensuing uncomfortable silence for some time before Nightwing's brow crumpled in thought. "Wait…didn't I know you were allergic to chromium? Hadn't this been mentioned sometime before?"

Starfire frowned, pondering that. "Oh! Yes, yes it was. That was eons ago, though. Back in the first year we were a team, something about Slade, I think."

Nightwing's expression darkened. "Right. He had that decoy chronotron detonator so that he could infect you guys with nanobots and make me his apprentice. No wonder I repressed that memory. Most unpleasant."

"Well, he's gone now, so he couldn't possibly be the one after me," she said in a reassuring sort of tone, but he was certain she wasn't actually reassuring him. Why would she? After a moment, she continued. "Are computer parts built with chromium?"

"Not that I know of," he admitted and added, "but if they were, you'd be sneezing because of this laptop. And every other computer in the Tower."

"Good point," she conceded, although she still looked confused. "But then why would TestCom make me sneeze?"

Nightwing frowned and rested his chin in his palm, fingers tapping thoughtfully on his cheek. "I don't know. I guess they must have chromium there, but there's no reason they should."

Starfire lounged against the desk, crossed her arms, and studied the screen with a raised eyebrow. "What's chromium used for, anyway?"

He shrugged. "I'm not entirely certain, but the only thing I know of is a chronotron detonator. And of course some computer factory-place isn't going to be actively trying to destroy the world."

She nodded, and the silence resumed for a minute or so until she adopted a confused expression. "How long does it take to make a chronotron detonator?"

"No clue. I don't know how long Slade worked on his. But then again, his bomb wasn't even real, so it wouldn't have taken as long. Some time, though," he decided. "I mean, you have to get all the parts, and I daresay that getting enough chromium isn't the easiest feat in the world. And then you have to have the proper technology and an immense power source to charge it. Years, probably," he concluded with another shrug of his broad shoulders.

"Years? Like…five?" she suggested, uncrossing her arms so she could lean back on her hands.

Nightwing arched an eyebrow. "I suppose. Why five? The only thing that happened five years ago was that—"

"I left," Starfire anticipated. "And three weeks prior to that, TestCom had apparently attempted to assassinate me. Now why would they want to kill me, of all people?"

Realization dawned on the leader of the Titans, his mouth falling open. "Because you're allergic to metallic chromium! And since you're so famous, as a Titan, there're a million and one Internet sites dedicated to you, and all of them would be aware that you're allergic. It'd be ridiculously easy to find that out, and anyone intent on building a chronotron detonator would have to kill you before they could! It all makes sense now!"

"Didn't you say that TestCom was built a little less than five years ago? Because it wasn't here when I left, so they must have built it afterwards," Starfire added.

"Plus, that assassin confessed that he had done it because TestCom had offered him their protection from something—precisely a massive detonation that will stop time. Who wouldn't want protection from that?" Nightwing leapt to his feet, slamming his fist into his open palm in a determined gesture.

"What are we going to do?" she asked as she raced out of the crime lab after him, following him into the elevator.

"Obviously, we're going to go take out the detonator," he replied curtly as the elevator descended swiftly to the common room's floor.

"Obviously," she repeated with a roll of her dark emerald eyes, and she leaned against the wall, listening absentmindedly to the lilting, jazzy piano of the elevator music.