I've recently noticed that each or my respective chapter got shorter than the last so you'll be glad to know this ones longer than the last. I tried to get it done fast so I must admit I didn't proof read and fear I will regret this decision tomorrow but it's 2AM and I wanted it to finish. Please don't get angry about where it ends up... I promise you a sweet next three chapters!

I must also admit that this one was fun to write. Let's just say this is where we start to get to the good stuff:D

I'm excited and you should be too.

Let the fun begin...

Smile Christmas is Coming

Tuesday, December 1; In the a.m.. As in morning time.

'Tis the season to be jolly. 'Tis the season of presents and mistletoe and Erin and Eddie talking again.

Yes you heard right. Erin and Eddie are talking again.

No I have no clue what about but I'm pretty sure it's something mundane such as, "If you were a cow would you eat grass because it really doesn't taste good but I think you'd need it to survive?"

No I'm not kidding I heard her ask someone that once. It wasn't Eddie but still…

You want to know how this all came about don't you. Well I don't really know what spurred the whole thing but something to the effect of me complaining to the teacher that Jack never stops talking during class and that I feel he would be better suited on the other side of the classroom. Once Eddie and Jack switched their spots back again the truth, that neither he nor Erin was over the other, seemed pretty evident.

And Janie's having another party. A Christmas one. With fairy lights and everything. I'm talking full fledged Christmas joy. In a week from Friday.

So this weekend me and Erin plan to get all our Christmas shopping done in one full swoop and erase that whole last minute shopping debacle. She says she already got me a present which scares me a bit because Erin always gets me something really unconventional. Like in sixth grade she got me a fish, named Hubert, and last year she bought me a star (she'd saved for a really long time) that is only visible through like two telescopes in existence but still it's cool to know that somewhere in the universe there's a Lizzy star.

I also have very good news. I haven't cried in the past four whole days, but I must also admit that I've been listening to overly sappy songs at a pretty strong constant. It's not just facing Darcy that has me all weirded out, it's like this whole re-evaluation of me. All the people I just wrote off at a moments notice. And also the embarrassment of the whole ordeal. I still can't bring myself to look in Darcy's direction of the room.

Is it so wrong for me to want to just forget all this happened?

The negative aspects…

Thursday, December 3; 12:21 p.m. It's lunch time.

The worst part about having the same best friend throughout the majority of you life is that they know all those stupid things about you that you wish you could just forget. Like how Erin knows that until I was eight, I spoke with a southern accent and that I used to think that having your license was the greatest thing in the world and my first kiss was in seventh grade during Truth or Dare. Yeah all that stuff.

Erin knows everything so for me to find out that she told Eddie that I only listen to country music when I'm sad or feel lonely or that I pick at my nails when I'm nervous or excited and that I've never had a real boyfriend because I push people away, seem completely horrible.

But I'm not mad. I mean that's something that maybe if I spent enough time with Eddie I know he would have found out about but it's just… he mentions it in public.

He quotes my favorite song during Humanities and smiles at me in the hallway calling me Snookie like my daddy did when I was a baby. So it's just embarrassing.

I kind of really wish why Erin had said those things to him because…well I guess it's because she want me and him to become best friends so that she wont feel as guilty this time around when she drags me along on their outings. Which by the way I have no idea why I get to be subjected to such torment.

But there are some things that Erin and Eddie don't know. Such as why I'm refusing to join them whenever I know that Darcy will be present. In fact I must admit that outside of Bridget no one knows the whole Darcy story, and even with her I left some parts out. Why?

Why can't I just come clean? Why do I feel as though this whole thing should remain just between the two of us?

Back in Action

Friday, December 4; after school time, which is the best time of all especially on a Friday.

I'm off my crutches again. I'm walking and guess what else, I'm talking. To Jo, that is, not Darcy.

I've decided that Jo should be her appropriate title because let's face it she was Jo pre-Darcy and nothing else has changed between us. Plus I mean I can't let the whole thing allow me to ruin even more of my relationships.

Look at me I'm growing.

Unfortunately that includes physically as well as mentally because when I went to the doctors about my ankle they measured me and I've grown half an inch since I last sprained my ankle.

So anyway the whole Jo thing. I just walked in and said, "Hey!"

She gave me back some silly apology to the effect of, "Lizzy you know I never meant anything by the whole ordeal. I never said anything to Darce about the whole thing. I just really thought you were interesting."

I jut smiled at her panicked tone and told her I liked her new haircut and the whole thing was behind us. It's weird now though when she mentions his name and I just sit shell-shocked for a whole second before I can smile again.

Well I'm back in action and going to see some ridiculous movie with some steroid induced action hero running around trying to save the poor helpless damsel.

Then working from six to ten so that I have some money to pay for my presents because I haven't been to work since I hurt my ankle… and my ego.

Will be fun. I promise, it will be.

Let the speaking begin.

Monday, December 7; seventh period.

"You like Dashboard Confessional?" Darcy asked me when Eddie began serenading me totally out of the blue in Humanities today.

"Um, yes?" I replied honestly looking at him for the first time in a long time. "Is that a problem?"

He shook his head vigorously. "No it's just I never pegged you for a Dashboard type girl. It's a bit whiney, that's all."

I shrugged casually. "It is. But everyone has their complaints in life. Even cold-as-ice Lizzy."

"You're not cold-as-ice. Only ice cubes can achieve such a feat," he replied smiling slightly and I felt the corners of my mouth pulling into a smile.

"Oh Will Darcy, King of Puns," I replied jokingly chuckling. I also noticed Erin and Eddie staring at us like bug-eyed goldfish.

"Yes I like Dashboard," I continued. "They're not my favorite but when I'm really in a mood they seem to hit the spot."

"I mostly listen to Jack Johnson when I'm upset, he always seems to put things in perspective," Darcy replied turning back in his desk to face the front.

"Which album?" I asked and he swirled back around to face me obviously not expecting me to continue the conversation and the pocket of his sweatshirt caught on the corner of his desk jerking him a little and making me smile.

"Depends on the mood. 'On and On' is kind of political. 'Brushfire Fairytales'-"

I interrupted him as I shouted out, "I love that one. It's my favorite!"

He eyeballed me. "Mine too."

I looked up at the ceiling briefly then back to him nodding a bit. "I think most people would agree it's his best, it's got the sweetness of 'In Between Dreams' and the great themes of 'On and On'."

He tilted his head. "I guess so."

I smiled at him kind of brightly then pointed at Erin. "See Erin I'm perfectly capable of being civil."

She let her jaw drop to match her popping eyes. "I never said you weren't."

"Erin why would you say such dreadful things to poor Lizzy?" Eddie asked staring at Erin in mock horror.

I chucked and I heard Darcy even give a small grunt of laughter.

It was weird that for once we actually managed to have a conversation without him grunting replies or me yelling like a four year old.

Almost, maybe even, kind of nice.

Stress marks?

Thursday, December 10; so late that I should be asleep.

I'm getting sick again from all the stupid stress of finals next week. I know they don't really matter that much but I have a lot of borderline grades due to all my missed school recently so this time it actually matters how I do for my classes.

I just need to push through next week and then I'm home free.

Plus I have Janie's party tomorrow so I get to maybe… hopefully blow off some steam, through non-illegal activity.

Have I mentioned that Darcy made me a CD? Honest to god.

It's good too. Has all these cool demos from random bends that no one's ever heard of.

And it had another note. This time on better terms.

Liz

Just random cool bands that remind me of Jack. Eddie has horrible taste in music but I thought maybe you'd appreciate it?

Well just tell me if you like them.

Darce

Yes that's verbatim. He called himself Darce. Good or not? Who knows?

And then today I saw him in the hall while I was running errands for Mrs. Hz. There he was waiting outside the deans office with his back pressed against the wall and his head bowed.

"Hey," I said stopping in front of him. "In trouble?"

He looked up from the floor he'd been watching and kind of smiled while shrugging. "Not really. Kind of fell asleep in Spanish. She didn't like that much I suppose."

I gave him a weird head tilt. "I wouldn't think she would."

He shrugged again. "She's been out to get me all semester. Just saw this as the last chance I suppose."

"Yes Darcy I'm sure that's the problem. The whole world's out to get you," I replied smiling and pulling the copies I'd made to my chest.

He smiled broadly this time. "Exactly. It's a wonder at how well you catch on sometimes."

"What can I say, I suppose I'm smarter than I seem?"

"Oh much," he replied smiling as Dean Hertz came out of his office scowling, then stopping when he saw me.

"Miss Morgan to what do I owe the pleasure?" he asked as though we were great chums.

"Nothing really Dean Hertz just making sure you're instilling only the harshest of punishments on the rebellious Darcy here," I replied smiling quite widely as Darcy's jaw dropped. "Oh and also the Hertzinator says to say hello!"

Dean Hertz, or Uncle John, just smiled at me and waved my last comment aside. "As for Mr. Darcy here, he just seems to be a bit stressed over finals, and obviously he should be if he's been trying to keep up with you, Miss Morgan. Take this note back to class Mr. Darcy," he finished handing Darcy the note and smiling at me as he re-entered his office and shut the door.

Darcy looked at me in awe. "I can't believe you just got me off the hook like that."

I just shrugged and began walking down the hall. "I didn't do anything. He was obviously planning on letting you go if he had a note already written out."

Darcy turned and followed me. "Yes but normally he gives at least a ten minute speech using every last scare tactic in the book."

I stopped in front of Mrs. Hz office and looked at him. "Darcy you come here far too often." I then shook my head and began to open the door to her office. "This is my stop."

He looked panicked for a brief second then smiled again. "Okay I suppose I'll see you tomorrow at Janie's thing?"

I nodded. "Yes and then there's the fact that I sit beside you in a class. So it is unavoidable that you will see me tomorrow."

"Unavoidable? Admit it you look forward to it all day," he smiled again towering over me.

I shook my head and rolled my eyes as I slipped into her office.

As soon as I'd shut the door and turned I saw Mrs. Hz smiling all too broadly and asking repetitively who on earth I'd been talking to that made my face turn pink.

I however maintain that never has such a tint reached my cheeks.

Tonight we're gonna hit the town.

Friday/Saturday, December 11/12; so late that I haven't a clue if it's tomorrow or today

So the party… was really good.

It was casual, due to the cold, and crowded. Janie had opened up her porch so people would throw on their sweatshirts and wonder out into the night for who knows what.

I designated myself driver and took Erin and Eddie with me after they promised to remain responsible because who gets drunk at a Christmas party?

When I got there I was immediately accosted by Damien asking me if I could start a conversation between Fitz and him. I agreed not because I think Damien has chance in hell but maybe slightly because Fitz was there with Darcy who had made me promise in humanities today that I'd at least say hi to him.

"Darcy, I'm here for my obligatory hello," I said smiling and flicking Fitz on the arm to get his attention. "Hello to you too Fitz, and Happy Christmas."

"Happy Christmas? I do believe this is America Lizzy not England dear. We say Merry here," Fitz said smiling at me.

This time I chose to hit him on the arm rather than flick him.

"Don't make fun of her," Darcy chipped in looking somewhat downcast by something or other, "I like happy better I think. Adds diversity."

I gave him a questioning look. "Oh yes because Darcy adapts so well to change."

"I do, don't I?" Darcy said proudly.

This time I punched him instead. "Let's not b egotistical. I was being sarcastic. You're the guy that freaked out when his best friend got a girlfriend."

"I maintain that she didn't like him," he said and I just pointed over his shoulder to where Erin was giggling as Eddie wrapped his arms around her. "Ok well she didn't like him that much. What's it matter anyway. They're back together."

I rolled my eyes. "Damien wanted to ask you where your girlfriend is," I said turning to Fitz and giving Damien a pointed look.

Fitz frowned for a second, "We broke up," he said then smiled again wrapping his arm over my shoulder, "Why are you looking?"

I grabbed his hand and pulled it back over my shoulder. "Trust me you could never handle me," I said smiling as he shrugged in reply.

"Too true. You're quite a handful dearie. I think it best I leave that one for others to try at," he added as I tried to ignore his pointed glance at Darcy.

"You do realize I'm not blind right Fitz?" I said closing my eyes so I could ignore both his and Darcy's respective reactions.

That's when Damien finally decided to speak and asked Fitz all these rather stupid questions about some rather dull movie that we'd watched last weekend.

"My god those two are dull," I yelled to Darcy standing up on my tip toes so I was closer to his ear and he could hear me over the music that had just started up.

"I concur," he replied bending down to meet me half way. "I never really enjoyed movies. More of a music guy myself."

"Trust me I know, I'm the music girl," I yelled back but he just shook his head and pointed to his ear to show that he couldn't hear me. I tried yelling it again and when my voice was still drowned out by the music Darcy literally took my arm in his hand and led me out of the house to the porch where a lot less people had taken residence due to the cold.

I didn't blame them for staying inside because despite what most people think Florida gets cold and I immediately felt the goose-bumps appear on my bare arms. "Jacket?" I asked rubbing my arms viciously.

"You do realize that if I go in there and get your jacket I'll never come back out?" he said as I scowled. "Fine, fine," he continued at my unwavering scowl and instead of moving he merely took off his own jacket.

"You do realize the repercussions that would occur if I took your jacket right?" I asked hesitating to take it.

"I'd be cold?" he asked.

"Yes that and our rumor mill will start churning again," I stated bluntly, but still grabbing his old baseball jacket and curling my hands up inside the excessively long sleeves after I'd gotten it on.

"Who cares what people think?" he said shrugging.

I stepped closer to him. "Who are you and have you done to Will Darcy?" I asked staring into his eyes from different angles and trying not to notice that they had little green specks rather than only the dull brown I'd always suspected they contained.

He shrugged again and rubbed his hands together. "That or your very limited perspective of him has died."

I looked back down and stepped back away. "Nope scratch that last remark Darcy's definitely still in there."

"Good or bad thing?" he asked simply and taking the step back that I'd just opened.

"Have yet to decide," I replied not budging and looking back up to him.

He got quiet and just kept breathing making clouds of perspiration with every breath. We weren't that close and yet I could smell the peppermint of his gum, although maybe it was mine.

"Have you ever tried to smile with half your mouth?" I asked filling the silence and laughed as he silently attempted it and the cloud returned as he burst out with laughter. "Yeah tricky isn't it?"

"I never knew you were so random."

"I never knew you could look so goofy," I replied.

"Did you like my CD?" he asked jumping right into his question without missing a beat.

"And you call me random?" I asked rhetorically walking over to the railing on the porch and perching myself up onto it as he walked over and stood beside me.

"Well did you?" he asked antsy of my reply.

"Honestly?" I asked and he nodded vigorously. "I really liked it. Especially the fifth song, that whole story about his mother made me want to go hug my mom and tell her I love her even when she's being a bimbo."

"I highly doubt any mother that could raise you would be a bimbo," he replied simply tugging at the bottom of his t-shirt.

I raised my eyebrow, "Have you never met Bridget? And remember that incident at the homecoming game?"

His eyes clouded for a second then he laughed. "Oh right. That was pretty funny."

I scowled. "Maybe for you. I don't know what happened but for some reason she's obsessed."

"With what? Embarrassing you?"

I shrugged. "That and the L word."

"The 'L word'?" he asked blankly.

I leaned in and whispered as if I was swearing, "Love."

He laughed. "Well aren't we quite the pessimist?"

I squeezed my eyes. "I just don't like the dependency that love seems to crave."

He sighed and looked at something over my shoulder. "No you definitely wouldn't Miss Independent."

I held my hand over my heart and fluttered my eyelashes. "Why this is an award I've so longed to receive!" I then gave mock pageant kisses to an imaginary crowd, and said, "Think you," to them twice before he grabbed my hand smiling.

"You can stop now."

I blew one last kiss to an extremely robust man in the front row that didn't really exist.

"So you really avoid that type of thing?" he asked simply.

I shrugged. "That's Erin's forte. Let them want what they want. I really just want an adventure."

"Doesn't everyone?"

I shrugged. "I suppose. In different ways." I pulled all my hair into my hand a stared down dreamily at the floorboards.

"So what do you want to be when you grow up?" he asked after a silent moment.

I shrugged. "Maybe a flight attendant. I know it sounds stupid," I added as he snorted, "But think of all the people you get to meet. The places you get to go. What would you do anyway?" I asked as he continued to chuckle.

"I want to be a pilot."

"See how can you make fun of me for that when you desire something so similar?"

He held up a hand. "You didn't let me finish. I want to be a helicopter pilot for the Navy and go on rescue missions."

I groaned. "Now I feel like a real bitch. You want to be all honorable and help people, and I just want to go to Rome."

He sighed and smiled. "Flight attendants help people too you know."

I waved him off. "Yes but in a much less literal way."

"It's getting late you know. Maybe we should go inside and dance or something?" he asked eyeing me hopefully.

"Oh no," I said shaking my head, "Will Darcy would never be caught dead dancing with the likes of Lizzy Morgan."

This time it was Darcy's turn to groan. "Oh don't go there. I liked you and you were rude to me."

"Again I'm forced to bring up the Erin/Eddie thing," I replied.

"One word for you: Jack."

"Well maybe if someone had told me to watch my baby sister more closely I wouldn't have caught them making out on my sofa," I replied and Darcy stopped with his retort.

"What? He kissed your sister also? Did he have a girlfriend at the time?"

I scowled. "Yes as a matter of fact he did."

Darcy leaned closer to me again. "I could beat him up if you want me too."

I smiled again. "What and risk you being sent to the deans again? I wouldn't dare request such a thing."

He smiled and didn't move again.

"It's funny how easily you seem to smile now. I think before this week I'd seen you smile like once," stated looking at him pointedly.

"I'm quite the robot I know."

I laughed so hard I almost fell from the railing I was perched on. "I used to refer to you as Robot-Darcy: the Emotionless Male."

He leaned even closer. "Just because I don't wear my emotions on my sleeve doesn't mean I don't have them."

I snorted. "On your sleeve? You barely wear them under four layers of clothing."

"Speaking of layers. I'm cold," he said rubbing his arms.

"We could go inside."

He shook his head. "No let's not. Too many witnesses."

I dropped my jaw in shock at his statement while he leaned even closer and this time really did fall off the railing as none other than Fitz suddenly appeared on the deck asking innocently, "What are you two up to?" then stopping when he saw me fall and him and Darcy jumping over the railing themselves to see if I was okay.

"I'm fine," I said shaking them off and ignoring my bad ankle's protest as I walked around back to the steps.

"You sure?" Fitz asked coming around with me and grabbing hand to steady me as I attempted the first step.

"Trust me I'm refusing to have sprained my ankle a third time so therefore I'm perfectly fine," I protested as Fitz left me put my weight on his arm to get up the last four steps and Darcy stood behind me grabbing my waist to sturdy we as I lifted myself.

Fitz giggled. "You have to admit it would be somewhat funny if you did it again." I shot him the glare of death and he stopped giggling. "Or not," he added as an afterthought.

"You know I once dated this girl who used to pretend she was hurt just so I'd kiss her. She was rather weird," Darcy said from behind me and I almost fell down the stairs as I whirled around to shoot him the same death glare.

Fitz laughed. "Darcy you truly are an idiot," Fitz muttered.

I released myself from both their grasps and grabbed the railing to help me back across the porch to the house.

"What'd I do Lizzy?" Fitz asked standing there blankly.

I pivoted on my good foot. "First of all Darcy I'm not your damsel! Don't associate me with the former bimbos because that is why we will never ever be dating! And Fitz sometimes you need to learn when to shut up. That is all!" I added and stormed into the house slamming the door in my wake.

It didn't take me long to find Erin and Eddie and push them trough the door to my car only to find Darcy sitting there on the hood of my car.

"What do you want?" I asked harshly.

"A ride and to apologize?" he asked.

"No need to I'm not upset, I growled as I hopped in the front seat and eventually the Erin and Eddie shuffled into the back as Darcy grabbed the front seat. Erin lived the closest to Janie's so I dropped her off first and then Eddie because without Erin around he's a rather dull person and as I head off the Darcy's house I could feel him staring at me from his seat.

"So what did I do to warrant such anger?" he asked eventually.

I glanced at him quickly then back at the road. "Nothing you did nothing. I'm just upset that my ankle hurts again."

I heard him sigh. "I believe that for a grand total of five seconds," he muttered as I pulled up to a stop sign in his neighborhood.

I looked over at him seriously and said sternly. "Trust me Darcy it' not anything you did."

Because I realized that later, after I'd dropped him off that it wasn't him I was upset at, he'd done nothing but be himself, it was me. I'd actually let myself want to be with him. To be that girl on his arm and that scared me. It made me feel weak.

What am I if not rebellious, stubborn Lizzy?

Let exams be done…

Wednesday, December 16; 2:55 p.m.

It's done. Exams are over. School is out for break.

When I get back I will not be a student of French nor Humanities but merely a Music appreciation and Chemistry student.

Did I mention how excellent I did in all my subjects? Yes even Interpretive Dance. A's across the board. And now only the joys and woes of the holidays to look forward to. If I wish to I can completely ignore every member of the junior class and become a total hermit that answers her cell phone for no one.

In fact I now make a resolution to only talk to Erin until New Years. No Darcy, although I don't believe he has my phone number anyway. No Janie. Definitely no Jack, whom I haven't talked to in quite some time, and even no Damien.

For the holidays are about family. Plus I'm going up to Virginia to stay with my dad for the holidays. Another reason why it's so great to have my Christmas shopping done early.

I gave E her present today which was this adorable scarf she's been staring at in Gap every time we went there to see if I could find something "Bridget-worthy". I knew she'd love it immediately and she didn't fail me.

She didn't have my present yet because she says it's not ready which makes me just a smidgen nervous about what on earth it could be. Or maybe that's just curiosity.

I feel bad that I'm leaving the mother here all by her lonesome but she's going to be staying at her (honest to god) boyfriend's house for the week.

I give her and Bridget their present tomorrow because it wouldn't be worth it to travel with them.

I got Bridget this t-shirt that says on the front "I'm a Barbie girl but you love me anyway" and has a Barbie doll on it. Very berry her. Mom I got a new watch which she's expecting because every year I give her one and by the next year she's lost it.

I'm very excited to go somewhere where it snows and me and Bridge can snowboard and wear long underwear and all that fun stuff. I'm a bit nervous though about spending time with el Padre because I haven't spent a Christmas at his house since I was six.

It'll be an adventure of that I assure you.

The weird realizations…

Sunday, December 20; 10:24 a.m.

I'm on break and yet here I am awake before the crack of noon. I assure you my mother would be very proud.

Life with dad is weird. I just don't normally see him for more than a weekend so it's odd to know he'll be around until Saturday.

It's cold up here but I love the book shop it's so warm and cozy and I still remember playing with Bridget around the store when wee were really little. It's no wonder I grew up to love books so much. They even smell great. I feel as though this week might get boring because dad still has to work the Christmas rush right up until Christmas eve but me and Bridge are planning to hit the slopes tomorrow and she wants to see if we can meet cute snowboarder guys while I want to find cell phone service so I can call Erin, because I'm roaming everywhere I go and my mom would shoot me if I had a twenty minute conversation with Erin. I really hope she's okay.

But then again she has Eddie now and is probably soaking in the bliss of not having me as a distraction away from her time with him. God I hope not.

I'm not so good at this whole hermit lifestyle because like twenty minutes ago I had this really strong feeling to talk to Darcy and so now I know all this altitude has my head all whacked out.

Gosh is it weird that I'm this homesick? I mean honestly what do I have that's all that great back there? I even miss my mother and her silly outfits and I hope she doesn't marry this guy Ron because then who would I make fun of for being flirtatious with every single father that we meet? I mean besides Bridget that is.

I'm having this sudden realization of how much I love my common ordinary non-adventurous life.

Home at last…

Saturday, December 26; 9:40 ish.

I just got home and am kind of relieved. I loved seeing my dad and he really did well for Christmas (he got me real life pearls!) but I missed having my mom who knows exactly what shirt I was looking at four months ago because she never forgets that stuff.

But I got home to the empty house and the Bridget falling asleep on the sofa almost immediately and now me wanting Erin to finally answer her phone so I can find out somewhere we could meet because aside from the three five minute phone conversations we had I haven't talked to her in over a week and I miss her. She's like my sister that I unknowingly allowed into my heart.

I missed the warmth of being here. Not as in weather because it's still rather chilly but the warmth of my home. My bed with my special pillows and sheets and my body indention in it.

Speaking of… I believe it's calling my name. Now if only Erin was.

Happy Belated Christmas.

Monday, December 28; 4:40

So Erin remained conspicuously absent Sunday also and then turned up this morning claiming how much she missed me and that she didn't call me yesterday because she was finishing my present which was so worth the wait. She'd worked on it almost six months.

It was a story. Not just any story: mine. It was about me and all my magical adventures in the world of dreams and it was so long and beautiful and I even ended up taking a magician along with me on my journey, whom she claimed was roughly based on a rather muscular Harry Potter. It was great and I told her that she was talented and could be a writer sometimes, because she could. It was the first time she'd ever let me read anything she'd written and I fell in love with this story. She could do this. To me she is too good not to.

For the rest of the day we snuggled up into my two warm sofas with three blankets each and watched "It's a Wonderful Life" all day.

It was classic Erin and me day. Because some things never change.

Happy New Year…

Tuesday, December 31; 12:52 – so I suppose that classifies this as January now.

It's true I did make my reappearance into the social world tonight with three resolutions: 1) be more open minded, 2) Try something new everyday, and the annual 3) give up chocolate (which if I'm being completely honest about I've already failed fairly miserably at).

Erin and I spent all day going to our shine maximum and every bit of us sparkled. I wore her new blinky fake diamonds with this sweet black dress from my mom and she wore the long black chain Aunt Claire gave me and a black dress of her own that made her look really pretty and me really jealous. I wore my huge snow-jacket when I was going there and it looked funny s the skirt of my dress hung out the bottom with my tights and ballet flats keeping my lower body warm. I even straightened my hair and pulled half of it up into this sparkly clip of Bridget's. I must admit I rarely go all out as I did for this night, but what can I say it was my début.

We arrived at the party and honestly Erin and I were almost immediately accosted by some guys, Eddie among them. I fought through the rest of the guys once Erin had departed and hung my jacket on top of the stack of them that had accumulated on one of the chairs and went in search of some familiar face.

I found Fitz first talking up some red-head by the fireplace, whom he quickly shooed when he saw me and stared at me, eyes alight. "My god Lizzy, you should wear that exact outfit everyday for the rest of your life."

I smiled at him and I could tell my cheeks flushed and eyes sparkled at the compliment. "Thanks Fitz, I must say you look quite hot," I commented because as always he did in a simple pair of jeans and an Abercrombie shirt that he rolled the sleeves up on and pulled perfectly across his chest.

He sighed. "What can I say I try, but only to impress the likes of you Lizzy your royal hotness."

I rolled my eyes and looked around the room. "You're ridiculous."

"No you are because I know that right now your attention is hardly on me but on searching this room for someone. Someone in particular perhaps. Maybe Will?"

I snapped my gaze back to him. "Yet again I say: 'You're ridiculous'. Why on earth would I be looking for Darcy?"

"Hmm maybe because the entire time you were gone you kept thinking about him? Am I close?"

I rolled my eyes again and chose not to respond but continue to examine the room.

"Which is good," Fitz continued, "because he spent the entire time here with me moaning about you being gone for a couple days. That boy's completely ridiculous."

But I never really registered what Fitz was saying because at that moment I finally spotted Darcy across the room talking to Janie about god knows what and I must say that he spotted me.

I'd like to tell you that our eyes met across the room and that he immediately came over to me saying how much he missed me and all that total crap but none of that happened, no because instead Janie stoop up on her tip toes and kissed him on the cheek and he broke his gaze at me to look calmly down at her.

I looked back to Fitz who was still rambling about something or other until he noticed that I'd involuntarily paled. "What is it sweetheart?" he asked looking at me in alarm.

I shook my head trying to clear the image of what I'd seen or at least modify it from the one that immediately leapt into my head of them really kissing.

Fitz looked around frantically over my head as I bowed it and pushed the top of it into his chest, although I swear I wasn't crying, or even upset at that.

Finally I felt Fitz stop shaking his own head in panic as he lifted mine and looked me into my eyes. "Good no tears. I'm sorry Lizzy I'd forgotten about her and Will. Tell me if you want me to stop," he commanded then proceeded to tell me how Janie and Will just kept meeting at the gym and she just kept asking him out until eventually he conceded to a movie with her.

I listened to the whole thing completely aloof and when Fitz asked me at the end of his explanation if I was okay I honestly replied with a very bright, "Yes. Honestly Fitz why wouldn't I be? I was flattered that Darcy liked me but it's not like I felt the same for him or anything so I really don't understand what you're getting so worked up about." I bit my lip as soon as I'd finished talking and Fitz sight.

He gave me a reluctant, "Good."

I smiled and brushed him off as I noticed my old pal Ty waving me into his corner and I kissed Fitz on the cheek and told him, "Have fun tonight."

I spent the rest of the night on the arm or Ty's chair and I kissed him lightly at midnight and even smiled at Darcy when we were getting a drink near each other from the refreshment table and told him, "Happy New Year," and scampered of before he'd said a single word.

I went home alone because Erin and Eddie had left long ago and I undress and now I'm going to sleep. Because honestly I really didn't like him.

I swear.

Please don't hate me. They just weren't ready to get together. Not yet! Don't forget that thing tha makes me update that much faster... what? Huh? Yeah thats right review!