A/N: 26 pages is now my personal best. It's longer just as I promised and of course filled with conflict.

I'm sorry it still took me forever but only two weeks so that really not that bad considering how busy I am.

Just ahve fun with it nd ignore my horrible grammer:)

Surprise visitors…

Wednesday, January 1; late afternoon

One will never guess as to who was my most recent visitor. Yes it was Will. How did you guess?

So there I am lounging around my living room basking in the glow of this being the first day of an entirely new year and that whole blank slate crap when the doorbell rings. Since I've already mentioned that Will came to my house it should have lost its shock value by now, but let me reiterate just for emphasis: Will Darcy for some very odd reason that I'm still not too sure about was on my doorstep.

I threw open the door most definitely not expecting to be greeted by Will's smiling face.

"Hi there Lizzy," he said simple as day. "Want to invite me in or shall I spend the entire day standing here on your very lovely door step?"

I shook my head my mouth agape in shock. "What on earth are you doing here?"

He put his index finger to his chin in mock thoughtfulness. "Well there are only two reasons that I could ever think of that might explain my presence at your house. One is that I was a bit miffed by you not saying but two words to me last night and wanting an explanation or the other might be that I can to see your sister."

I scowled at him for a second. "You don't even know my sister's name."

"Of course I do."

"Then what is it?" I asked still scowling.

"It's Bridget," Bridget herself quipped in at Will's momentary silence and miraculously appearing over my shoulder as if on cue. "Will won't you come in?" she asked giving me a pointed look.

"See," Will said turning to me with a grin and stepping past me through the doorway, "at least someone has some propriety."

This did nothing to help remove my semi-permanent scowl.

"So," Will asked Bridget almost immediately after passing me, "which one's Lizzy's room?"

I whirled around angrily. "No way are you going into my room!"

He shrugged nonchalantly. "Well I've already seen the rest of the house, remember?"

I blushed remembering that whole incident so many months before.

"I think it's this way," he said strolling down the hall that coincidentally led to my room and I chased after him. "Let's have a look shall we?" he asked stopping with his hand on my door handle.

"Let's not," I replied sternly grabbing his hand from the knob.

"Why Lizzy? Have something to hide?" he asked with his eyebrows at their peak as if he was challenging me.

"No," I shot back bluntly.

"Well now that you're being so cruel about it," he said pulling his hand from my grasp and shoving my door open, "I feel that much less guilty about snooping."

He walked into my room as if it was his own and immediately collapsed on my bed being swallowed in my pillows. "Oof you have a lot of pillow."

I shrugged and tried not to blush. "I'm a bad sleeper."

"Thought as much," he said grabbing a book off the foot of my bed. "Ooh Lizzy keeps a journal. Never would have guessed that one."

I immediately leapt into action to grab my journal back. "That's mine!" I squeaked making an attempt to grab it but he merely stood up on my bed with the book raised high above his head.

"Lizzy lighten up a bit. Can I read it?"

I shook my head vigorously and climbed up so I was standing beside him on my bed.

He ignored my reply and instead flipped to the first page. "Ah the first day of school. A most appropriate place to begin a new diary."

I growled. "It's a journal."

"Oh hey it mentions me!" he said excitedly flopping back onto his butt.

"Does not!"

"Lizzy I can't believe you thought such horrible things about me!" he protested smiling as he read the journal.

"What makes you say it's past tense?" I asked acquiescing and flopping down beside him.

He looked up at me. "Touché."

"Can I honestly have my journal back?" I asked in a semi-vulnerable tone.

"Yes but first I get to read an entire entry of my choice," he said flipping the pages.

"You can read an entire entry at random," I said trying to bargain.

"Nope there's a particular night I remember that I really would like to read your very personal account of," he said simply flipping to the back of the book.

"Which one?" I asked trying to peek over his shoulder as he read.

"Last night's of course," he said offhandedly as he read.

"Please don't," I pleaded but he never replied merely immersed himself in my writing. Now that I think about it maybe him reading that particular entry was the most incriminating of them all but at the time the thought of him not reading some of my more insulting entries seemed like a relief.

The entire time he read I squirmed around on my bed anxiously tossing pillows into the air and catching them and flopping into a different position every few seconds but every time I'd move he just looked up at me for a second then went back to his reading.

When he'd finally finished he closed the book and looked at me with a simple statement of, "Most informative."

"I can't believe I just let you do that," I sated simply slapping my hands over my face.

"I don't know what you're talking about. It was very well written," he said smiling politely.

"You know I'm not talking about you reading my writing style but more of the things that were said!" I said from behind my hands.

He grabbed both my wrists and pulled them down from my face. "Nothing I couldn't have heard from Fitz had he actually been willing to tell me anything about what had happened besides that I should come talk to you today."

"Yes but now you know exactly how insane I truly am," I said softly.

He smiled as if I just told the funniest joke. "Trust me I've known that since the beginning."

I scowled again. "You're really not funny."

"And yet all too often you find yourself laughing," he replied and I just snorted in reply. "So about what you saw last night…" he trailed off and I didn't have the strength to let him continue.

"You really don't have to explain."

"Are you sure because I have a rather good explanation?" he asked seriously.

"You and I are friends right?" I asked and he nodded yes. "Then it really doesn't matter. Honestly, I'm not really upset about anything," I said shrugging. "I have no reason to be."

He nodded scrunching his bottom lip so his chin creased. "Yep, that seems to be the impression I got from your journal too," he added tossing the book in question from my bed and it slid to a halt across the room.

"Good. Now was there any other reason you came over here or are you planning to bother me for an entire day?" I asked standing up from the bed.

"I plan on bothering you all day of course," he said standing to join me. "We could go to lunch," he stated simply.

"And I could kick your butt at bowling," I added.

"Doubtful but you could try."

"Maybe if we're feeling like particularly compassionate people we could invite Eddie and Erin to play us in pool when we're finished bowling and we could smash their sorry butts into the ground," I added smiling as I grabbed my keys from my desk and he pulled them back out of my hand.

"I'll drive," he said putting my keys back on my desk.

He followed me out of the house and I stopped in my tracks, with him soon after walking into my back, when I saw the car he'd parked in my driveway. "Is that yours?" I asked staring at the beautiful new convertible.

He shrugged and opened my door. "It's my consolation prize."

I numbly sat down and ran my fingers over the leather interior. "What, may I ask, was done that requires such a massive consolation?"

He shrugged again as he slid coolly into his own seat and turned on the car. "My mom just couldn't seem to get back from her Caribbean cruise with Jennifer Lopez in time for Christmas."

I nodded casually then turned back to him my jaw once again dropped in awe. "Jennifer Lopez?"

He shrugged for the third time. "Apparently they go to the same spa or something when my mom's staying in California."

"What exactly does your mom do for a living?"

"She co-owns a record label."

"Only a co-owner?" I asked joking.

"Well I own the other half," he said simply while backing out of my driveway and refusing to meet my eyes.

"You what?"

He shifted the car into drive. "Yeah I inherited it when my dad died. Where do you think I got all those demos?"

At this point I swear to god my jaw must have been on the floor. "So… wow."

He sighed. "Yeah I guess that's an accurate description of it."

"So why do you live here and not L.A. or New York of something?"

This time he finally looked at me. "My dad loved it here. It's where he grew up before he hit it big and it's where he wanted me and Georgie to grow up."

I nodded. "That makes a lot of sense."

It was silent for a few seconds as we pulled out of my neighborhood and cruised down the road. "It's kind of weird when you talk about 'Georgie'."

He looked over at me again. "I'm sorry?"

I smiled and shook my head. "Not like that. I'm just so used to her as Jo. That's all."

He bobbed his head and the car rapidly grew quiet again.

"I just realized I'm still in my P.J.'s," I said starring off through the windshield.

He looked over at me again this time smiling. "Well opps. Do you want to go back?"

I looked in the back seat of his car and pulled a sweatshirt off the floor. "Is this clean?"

He nodded.

"This'll do then," I replied and pulled it over my head as he laughed.

"I think you just redefined the term 'low-maintenance'."

I shrugged after I'd gotten it over my head. "It's just you and me. What's it matter what anyone else thinks? Plus this thing's long enough to be worn as a dress. Exactly how tall are you?"

"Six and a half?" he asked rhetorically. "Something like that."

"And I thought me at a measly 5'11" was tall. How silly of me."

He chuckled. "It'll come in handy when I become a pro baseball player."

"I thought you wanted to join the navy?"

He smiled. "I have absolutely no clue what I'll do when I grow up."

"How can you say that and smile. We graduate in a year and a half!" I said throwing my hands up in the air.

"Trust me I know. I just don't want to decide on anything before I'm absolutely sure."

I sighed. "I can empathize with that. I have absolutely no idea either."

He laughed. "What happened to that whole stewardess thing?"

I hit him on the arm. "Flight Attendant! They're flight attendants."

"Right," he replied drawing out the i.

"I really just want to go wherever the world has to take me. I want to see it all and try it all. I want diversity and to never feel stuck in that rut my mom accidentally wondered into."

"The rut eh? Commitment-a-phoebe at such a young age," he said shaking his head solemnly.

"Holy hypocrite batman!" I said poking him in the arm.

He rubbed his jaw on his shoulder as he pulled the car into the bowling alley. "I'll decide someday. I'm just not ready yet. Once I have to have something though, then I'll do everything it takes to get it."

"So you're my opposite then. I spend my entire life trying to ignore what I want so I don't get upset when I don't get it and you get to spend yours just thinking up things to desire so that you can obtain them."

"You say that as if I'm the most spoiled child on the planet," he said opening his door after he pulled into his parking spot and I hopped out to join him in the parking lot. "I don't go around looking for things to want, they just kind of come at me. Nor do I get everything either. I'm not getting what I want most right now."

"Aha! So there is a future goal you've set. What is it then?" I asked excitedly as he held open the door to the building for me.

"It's unobtainable, because it doesn't exist, and therefore not even worth discussing."

He held up a two with his left hand for the desk clerk who just popped her gum and asked me bitchily, "What size?"

I shot her a dirty look and muttered, "Ten and a half."

Will looked at me for a second with the hint of a smile and told the girl politely, "I'll take a twelve."

Obviously the conversation was dropped because we argued for about twenty minutes on whether or not I should pay for myself and eventually it was decided I'd pay for pool instead, although I never did that either.

I must admit I beat him. No I slaughtered him: 196 to 102 the first game which seemed to demoralize him because in the second game he only bowled a 45 to my 180. It was actually very fun and we then met the two Es (a new nickname me and Will decided on after an odd comment he made about how creepy it was that their names created alliteration.) for lunch at Chili's. They both seemed a bit shocked when it was just me and Will out to lunch together.

After we killed Erin and Eddie in Pool, Will and I got back in his car and I just sighed. "That was fun."

He started the car. "Can I just say I was and idiot for not noticing how much those two like each other?"

"Yes you may," I replied smiling.

"Ok. I'm an idiot. Now that I notice it though I wish I didn't," he added with a disgusted face.

"Yes rather sickening isn't it?"

"Very," he said as though he'd tasted something bad.

"How come you're nice now? I know we've made 'revelations' and all that but still I've never seen you act as friendly as you do now."

He shrugged and smiled. "I suppose you just bring out the best in me."

I laughed and shook my head. "See like that."

He smiled. "I really don't know. I've always thought of replies to people's comments, I just never said them aloud."

"I like this Will more than Darcy."

He shrugged as we pulled into my driveway. "I do too actually. Who knew I was capable of making people laugh?"

I chuckled. "Look you even broke the icy exterior of the Ice-Queen. Quite a talented young man."

He rolled his eyes. "Lizzy you never could live up to your Ice-Queen reputation."

"Up until now you did a very good job with the robot reputation."

He smiled. "What can I say, I try."

I walked back to the house grinning and now Bridget is convinced I'm on drugs.

Tennis star…

Friday, January 3

Somehow Will and Fitz managed to convince me to go have a "couples" tennis tournament with them today. What I didn't realize was that when they said couples they meant it; Erin and Eddie, Darcy and Janie, and apparently Fitz and I are the newest couple.

Fitz is really horrible at tennis too. There we were playing against Janie and Darcy and he can't even get his damn serve over the net.

"C'mon Fitz! You're the least coordinated athletic guy I've met in my entire life!" I yelled dropping my racket onto the pavement in defeat.

"Lizzy be nice," I heard Erin shout from the bench and shot her a dirty look.

"You forget E I'm not nice. I am however honest."

Then Will came over to the side of the court silently chuckling. "Can't say I didn't see it coming."

"Hey ass hole. Shut up," I growled. "I'm tired of losing."

"Sorry sweetheart, I tried to tell you I suck," Fitz said shrugging as if it was nothing, because it was. I was just overreacting.

"Well you severely underestimated yourself," I threw at him walking off the court.

"Lizzy don't be ridiculous. It's just a game," I heard Will shout as I sat down on the bench but I tried to ignore him, he however took that as a sign that he should just come join me. "So Lizzy," he started sitting down beside me, "what's all this really about?"

I looked at him pointedly. "It's about Fitz sucking big time and me getting stuck on the losing team. You know I'm overly competitive."

"Yes I know, but still don't you think you're being a bit extreme?"

I shook my head vigorously. "Yes that's right it's just stupid Lizzy overreacting again. That always seems to be the problem doesn't it."

He looked at me pointedly. "Now that you mention it, it kind of is."

I looked down at the ground having most definitely not expected that as his answer. "Am I really overreacting?"

He nodded slowly. "Just a lot."

I punched him on the arm. "Hah. Not funny."

"I thought it was."

"You know for someone who's supposed to be so emotionless I really let things get the better of me," I replied quickly.

Will looked confused. "What does that even mean?"

I shrugged. "I suppose it's up for interpretation."

"Come play," he said simply.

"If I can have a new partner," I said simply but standing up all the same.

"Fine I'll be your partner."

"Who will be Janie's partner?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Whoever."

"You don't have to do that. You play with Janie, I'll stick with Fitz, at least this way I'll be the only one upset instead of everyone but me."

"Look at you Lizzy, so logical and self sacrificing," he said smiling as we joined the group.

"Wow Darcy you must be some sort of magician. You even made her smile," Erin said in total awe.

I scrunched my nose. "Fitz I'm sorry. You may suck but that's no reason for me to get so angry."

Fitz's eyes bugged out of his head and Erin's jaw dropped.

"Did you hypnotize her Darcy?" Fitz asked.

Will shrugged again, "Nope just told her she was being a total bitch."

I hit him on the arm as hard as I possibly could noticing Erin and Eddie exchange very weird glances but trying to ignore them as I picked up my racket. "I'm serving."

Fitz and I won that game and Will has a huge bruise on his arm now.

Stupid technology…

Monday, January 6

My car broke down.

It's raining, the first day of school, and my car decides it would be the perfect day to break down.

I don't know what prompted me to call Will first for a ride but I did.

"Will my car broke down."

"I'll pick you up," he said no questions asked and that was that.

He picked me up with Jo is tow and even made her give me the front.

"What do you have in place of humanities?" he asked not looking off the road as I switched the radio to my favorite country station.

"Chem. You?"

"Same. Guess you're stuck with me for a whole new semester," he said clicking the radio station back onto his CD.

"Grrrreat," I said drawing it out sarcastically and flipping the station back and even setting is as a preset so I could flip back to it quickly if he tried to do it again.

"Lizzy no country music is allowed in this car," he said predictably changing it back again.

I just pressed my button. "New rule Will: I need country music when I've had a bad day. Today thus far has been a bad day."

He cast me a weird look and stopped trying to switch it back. "Just this once."

I heard Jo snort from the back seat.

"What?" I asked turning around in my seat to face her.

"Nothing," she said smiling broadly.

"How was your break?" I asked.

"So great. Lizzy I have so much to tell you!" she said squeaking very girly.

"So then tell me," I said smiling.

"Lizzy I'm in love!"

This time it was mine and Will's turn to snort. "Jo darling you really think love is something that happens in two weeks?"

She shook her head. "Not for you but for me it does! Lizzy I swear I am!"

Will cast her a backward glance. "George you're a freshman. You're young and vulnerable. Not in love."

I smacked Will on his arm right where I knew his bruise was and watched him wince. "Don't listen to your bother. You're not vulnerable, just mentally unstable."

She scowled. "I can be in love if I want to be. Plus I like how neither of you even ask who I'm in love with."

"Fine," I said smiling, "Who are you in love with then?"

"Damien."

This time I truly cracked up. "Hon I'm sorry to say this but Damien is a bit off limits."

She scowled seriously this time.

"Because he likes you?" she asked and I gagged.

"What the hell makes you say that?" I asked still smiling.

She shrugged. "You guys hang out a lot and he's always talking about you. For a long time I thought you two were dating."

I giggled at the obscurity of it.

Will looked at me funny. "So does that mean you are or aren't with Damien?" he asked.

I smiled. "Oh god you thought so too. You're both insane!"

Will shifted again. "Well you two are really flirtatious."

I laughed again. "Trust me we are anything but. Damien and I were never nor will ever be together."

"So does that mean I have a chance then?" Jo asked hopefully.

I turned back to her and gave her a soft smile. "Sweetheart trust me when I say you do not love Dames. He's just not interested okay?"

She scowled. "What aren't you telling me?"

"A lot but it's nothing I'm permitted to say. I'd just take my advice and not go there."

We got to school and Will and I herded Jo off to the freshman portables then he walked me to my locker. "I still can't believe you thought I'd have a secret relationship with Damien," I said laughing silently and he blushed.

"You do lots of unpredictable things Lizzy. It's hard for people to tell sometimes," he said seriously though his eyes were twinkling.

"I love winter," I replied pulling my hands into the hoodie pocket.

"You say that now but when your toes fall of from wearing flip flops I will show no compassion."

"You won't even donate a single toe?" I asked pulling books from my locker and handing them to him to hold until I could shove them in my backpack.

"Not mine but maybe some of Georgie's."

"You're sister kills me," I said smiling and slamming my locker closed.

"She's weird I know."

"She's a Darcy. I'd expect nothing less than for her to be a bit peculiar."

"Where do you go first?" he asked handing me back my books on by one.

I just hummed the Keith Urban song that had been playing in the car.

"Earth to Lizzy?" he asked waving his hand in front of my face. "You're smiling a bit uncontrollably.

"Am I?" I asked dreamily.

He nodded vigorously. "Yes, very much so."

"I guess I'm just happy."

"I thought you were having a terrible day thus far," he pointed out.

"Yes it's weird how rapidly my moods seem to change isn't it?"

"You're probably the weirdest person I've ever met," he said shaking his head and turning into a classroom. "I'll see you in Chemistry," he added then disappeared through the door.

He was right about the smiling thing because for the rest of the morning at least twelve people called me "sunshine" and many more asked what I was so happy about.

I probably smiled broadest when I walked into my Chemistry class and was greeted by Fitz calling me sunshine just as so many other people had. "Yes now I have a chance of passing this class if sunshine's in it."

Darcy walked in with Janie as Fitz asked me pleadingly. "Please, oh please princess Lizzy. Be me lab partner so I can pass and graduate and you can get rid of me!"

I smiled again at him but this time it was harder to contort my face into the correct shape and it came out as a grimace.

"Don't think I didn't see that," Fitz whispered suddenly all business. "You like Will, no matter how reluctant you are to admit it and I have noticed how much your mood seems o plummet when you see him with her. Now be a good girl and be my lab partner before I tell Will all about how he's gotten to you."

"That's not at all true plus it's blackmail," I whispered blankly.

"Is it?" he said eyebrows raised.

Will sat down beside me and Janie in front of him. "What are you two whispering about?" he asked looking at us blankly.

"I'm trying to get Lizzy to be my lab partner," Fitz said simply and I bit my lip.

"So did she say yes?" Will asked.

I nodded still biting my lip. "Yes I guess I did."

Fitz smiled at me and I turned pink. "I told you so," he mouthed to me.

I tried to scowl and shake my head but I think my face was too flushed for him to ever buy it.

Will watched this whole interchange with his eyebrows furrowed when he noticed that neither I nor Fitz would make eye contact with him he decided it best to not ask. "Lizzy do you need a ride home?"

I shook my head still not meeting his eyes or even any other part of him for that matter. "I think I'll just ask Erin."

"Nope Eddie just told me that him and Erin are going out to lunch after classes," Will said simply trying to catch my eye.

"Shit," I muttered. "I'll just ask someone else then."

I'm pretty sure Will shook his head but I wouldn't really know seeing as I refused to look at him. "That's stupid I'll take you."

"Maybe I'll ride the bus," I muttered.

"Oh Lizzy don't be silly," Fitz said smiling as if it were his birthday. "Will's offering you a ride. Just take it. It's not as though you have any particular reason to say no."

I tried to scowl but blushed again.

"Ok what's going on with you two?" Janie asked pointing to me and Fitz. "Are you two dating or something?"

I looked up from my desk in shock them quickly back down when I saw Will's incredulous face.

Both Fitz and I were too shocked to even protest and my face was still glowing from Will's expression.

I'd never in my life been the type of girl that blushes with every interaction so what on earth was going on with my coloring.

That afternoon out of desperation I climbed into the front seat of Will's car and tried to ignore my pounding heart by distracting myself by looking out the window.

"Will this isn't the way to my house," I said blankly as Will pulled into his own driveway.

"Georgie get out," he said sternly.

She seemed to sense something I didn't because she obediently leapt from the car.

"She didn't have to leave," I said suddenly, and for the first time in my life, nervous about being left alone with Will.

"We're going to lunch," he stated as if it wasn't anything he planned on arguing about. I however decided immediately against it.

"No. You're taking me home," was all I said.

"No we need to talk."

I growled. "Fine say what you have to say but say it now because I'm only getting out of this car once we pull into my driveway."

"I can't believe you're going back to being a bitch to me. I thought we were over that Lizzy."

I rolled my eyes. "Say what you have to say Will because this may be the last time I bother to listen."

He stopped for a long time and I noticed that he was heading back in the direction of my house. Suddenly the words just seemed to burst from him. "Why the fuck are you dating Fitz?"

I looked at him incredulously.

"You know what I hate about you," I said sternly, "It's that shit right there. You sit there and act all jealous about the idea of me seeing another guy, be it Damien or Fitz, and yet you're the one with a girlfriend. You're a dirty hypocrite. You have no say in my life so please don't even bother trying."

"You're ridiculous," he muttered.

"Yep that's me, ridiculous," I said clearly as he pulled into my driveway and I quickly scrambled from the car. "And just for the record I am not dating Fitz, Damien, nor even you for that matter," I said angrily as I slammed the door before he could reply and fled into my house not knowing exactly what I was more upset about, the fact that Darcy was really getting to me or the fact that I'd even noticed.

Avoiding…

Friday, January 10

It's Friday and I haven't talked to or even been within three feet of Will Darcy.

Fitz sits by me in Chemistry and I pretend as though he's the only person in the class and only speak to him when I absolutely must.

"Lizzy you and Will should just forgive each other for whatever stupid thing you seem to be fighting about and make-out passionately on the lab tables because I'm a bit tired of the sexual tensions," Fitz said sternly leaning across the aisle to speak to me.

I looked at him with a face of pure contempt. "Will who?"

"Oh shut up. You miss him and it's killing you to not talk to him."

I just kept my face rigid.

"Lizzy, would you finally just admit that you like him and that you're jealous," he continued.

"No. I don't lie Fitz," I said coldly.

"Lizzy…" he warned as if chastising me.

"Fitz I see no point in arguing about something that will never happen. Now what did you get for number four because I got HCl and water," I replied passively.

"Fine you want to go back to that damn game of yours then I don't care. It's not my life you're making miserable," he replied turning back to his paper and scribbling away for the rest of the class.

I now get to spend the entire night on my couch reading Harry Potter for probably the twelfth time and wallowing because I haven't seen Erin since we played tennis and I miss her.

When Someone Writes Something…

Sunday, January 12

Erin stopped by today. She said her and Eddie were at Eddie's house when Will came over.

"You can stop now Erin," I replied tiredly, "I don't care much about any story that has Darcy in it so you should just save your breath."

She looked at me almost as if she pitied me and I refused to wield any information with my facial expression.

"Lizzy did you ever read the rest of my story?" she asked looking at me simply and calmly.

I stopped having, out of all questions one could ask, definitely not expected that one. I slowly shook my head.

"No I don't think I ever finished it."

She looked at me with a half smile and picked up the copy of it that I had left on my desk after she'd given it to me.

"Well then maybe you should get on that."

"Okay… why? I mean of course I want to read it I just… isn't this all a little random?"

She shook her head. "You know I wrote this entire story about you. Lizzy you're a better character than I could ever dream up. You don't require a conflict because you have so many just built right up inside you. What is it about you that tries to keep you from being happy?"

I grunted. "I want to be happy I just don't think that any one person can make me be it. I want to do it all by myself."

She put her hand on my arm. "That seems awfully silly to make something that is so easy that much more difficult."

"Who's to say that way's easier?"

She looked at me with compassion in her eyes. "Let's not debate it. I love you Lizzy and I know how great a person you truly are, but I just don't understand why you won't let anyone else see that."

I dropped my head in confusion. "Because you would never hurt me."

"And Will would?"

I looked at her slightly miffed and nodded. "We were never even together and he managed to do so."

"No you managed to hurt yourself and him for that matter."

I raked my hands through my hair in frustration. "God Will leads me on then goes out and starts dating someone else. Am I the only person who remembers that? He's even the one that talked Eddie into breaking up with you! Did you even know that? Erin don't stick up for him. Don't act as though he's completely innocent and I'm the big bad witch, he pushed me away just as much as I did to him! You of all people in the world are supposed to be on my side! Why aren't you?"

She looked at me a bit hurt. "Lizzy you know I'm on your side. I'm always on your side."

I shook my head. "No you're on your own side. You just liked that while I was hanging out with Will you didn't have to feel guilty about ditching me for Eddie all the time."

"I can't believe you'd even think that," she said softly and weakly.

"You're just upset because it's true. God I don't even care. I have to go to work," I muttered grabbing my keys off the dresser and storming out of the house ignoring Bridget ask, "What's wrong?" as I slammed the door and left.

Working girl…

Friday, January 17

I've worked a total of 43 hours since Saturday.

It sucks yes but at least I have tons of money. I've decided I'll save it all and maybe go to Europe after graduation. Maybe I'll just go this summer and not come back.

I hate this town.

I hate that it seems to be impossible to avoid anyone.

I hate Janie Masterson. There she comes prancing into Starbucks today in her teeny-tiny mini-skirt and bobbing ponytail.

"Hey Lizzy. I thought I might find you here," she said perkily.

"Well I do work here Janie," I replied not really paying attention to her as I made some tall guy a Grande cappuccino.

"Well do you have a break soon? I kind of want to talk to you."

I was supposed to take a dinner break soon but I wasn't hungry so instead I lied, "No I just took it. Sorry."

She seemed to catch the lack of sincerity in my voice because she sighed and said, "We were friends not that long ago you know. I do realize when you're lying or not."

I just shrugged but she didn't give up.

"Ok I get it. You don't want to talk to me, I'm assuming over something to do with Will but here's the thing: me and Will are nothing compared to you and Will. I'm no idiot. I know who he thinks about when he gets all quiet and spacey. I know why he's been grumpy lately and why he doesn't joke around with me like he does with you. I. Get. It."

I looked at her blankly. "That's great that you and Darcy have such a… passionate relationship but you're wrong about Will and I because there's nothing between us. Nothing. So I don't really understand your motives for coming here and giving me such a lovely speech and honestly I don't really care. You and Darcy do whatever you want, it really doesn't concern me."

She laughed and shook her head. "You're completely deluded. Will and I aren't even dating. We mostly just talk about you when we're together. Don't even try to say such things to me about not caring because I'm not stupid and I've already told you how bad of a liar you are. The only person standing between you and Will is you."

She said it with finality and a sternness that I never even knew Janie had and then walked out. I didn't have to like her at that moment but I couldn't help but respect her.

So I spent the rest of the night focusing on her tone and as little as possibly on the words she actually said.

Refusals and Repetition…

Monday, January 20

Erin has called me seven times since Friday.

I have answered none of them.

People wonder why I don't let people into my heart but then they always seem to answer their own questions.

I'm pretty tired of being right all the time. I'm tired of having to keep people out because honestly I don't want to. It's just that people don't seem to ever give me a reason to trust them.

Or at least most people don't. Eddie however seems to have gotten into my heart.

When a foreign number appears on my phone out of pure curiosity and maybe slightly out of boredom I answered.

"Miss Lizzy Morgan do not for the life of me hang up," the voice says excitedly.

"Who is this?" I asked.

"Eddie," was all he said.

"If you're calling about Erin then I might have to hang up," I said back.

"Well then I'm not calling about Erin," he replied quickly.

'Then what may I ask are you calling for?"

"Well you of course," he said brightly.

"Am I receiving yet another lecturing for 'being a heartless bitch'?" I asked back with more character than I'd had in my entire life.

"Heck no. You're not a 'heartless bitch' so I would never give such a lecture."

"Ok then. What is it?"

"I just wanted to make sure you're ok and that you know you do still have people on your side about anything you wish to be upset about."

"What?"

"Can I come over?" he asked innocently.

"No Erin?"

"No Erin," he agreed.

"Fine then but I work in an hour."

I hung up and ten minutes later he showed up on my doorstep.

"Hello Lizzy. How are you?" he asked stepping through my doorway and standing awkwardly in the hall.

I shrugged. "Honestly?"

"Always," he responded.

"I'm kind of out of it. Work a lot so at least I'm no longer broke."

He sighed. "That's… well that horrible actually. You must be bored out of your mind."

I shrugged and kind of let a smile slip.

"Ah there it is that winning smile that makes my best friend swoon."

The smile slid off my face as if someone had just said my mother had died.

"And yet it goes so quickly. Look Lizzy dear you helped me out when I was a heartbroken little fool and so now I plan on doing the same for you, he said seriously as I led him into my living room.

"No need because unlike you I'm no heartbroken little fool."

He nodded. "That's for sure. But you're also no elated little elf."

"Elated little elf?" I asked smiling despite myself again.

"Yes they are the happiest creatures on earth you know," he replied knowingly nodding his head.

"You are so perfect for Erin sometimes it scares me," I said shaking my head but still smiling.

"I could say the same thing about you and someone else but I know it would only upset you," I turned on me heel to face him as he said this. "So I won't," he finished.

"Then what did you come here to say?"

He stuck his hand into the pouch of his sweatshirt. "I didn't come here to say anything. Just thought maybe you'd like to watch a movie." He pulled a movie box from his pocket. "Moulin Rouge. I know it's your favorite sad movie."

I grabbed the box. "You know that if I watch this I'll be depressed for days afterwards."

He looked at me and shrugged. "Are you really not feeling so already?" he asked and I shrugged in reply. "Then I don't see how a little more sadness could hurt."

He popped in the movie and spent the rest of the night listening to me comment on the attraction level of Ewan McGregor.

He was very patient and very simple and for that he made me second-guess myself more than anyone else who had talked to ever could have.

He made me realize that I could be happy with just the simple companionship of someone to watch a movie with me.

Little sisters and their older brothers…

Wednesday, January 22

"Lizzy you know why I think you should never date my brother?" Jo asked me in dance today.

"Because our personalities are incompatible."

She shook her head. "No that's definitely not true. It's because when you fight I have to listen to him moan about what an idiot he is and why he could never make you like him."

"Oh how I pity you," I replied flatly.

"Honestly Lizzy I would have done the exact same thing to him. Where does he get off thinking he can rule your life? You're not his girlfriend. He's always trying to control my life and I let him do it more than I should because I know he cares about me but with you he never made that clear. He never told you about what his true relationship with Janie was and yet he expects you to tell him everything about you. I would have just told him to shut up."

I looked at her in awe. "Honestly?"

She nodded. "Yep, but still could you please just make amends for my sake. You may not think much of it but he's truly dreadful to be around right now. For all our sakes really; just say like one word to him. That should shut him up for a couple days."

I laughed.

"We'll see."

She threw her hands up in the air in celebration. "Sweet, that's not a direct 'no' so I'm happy!"

I laughed at her as she did this horrible ballerina turn and slipped on the mat.

It may not have been a "direct no" but it wasn't a yes either for at that moment up until this one right now, and maybe most of the ones after this, I'm still not ready to look in Darcy's general direction yet alone speak to him.

Phone calls…

Friday, January 24

"Well if it isn't my second favorite person in the world!" Eddie exclaimed into the phone as I call him this afternoon.

"Only second?" I asked.

"Sorry dear Erin's first."

I shrugged even though he couldn't see me. "Naturally."

"What can I do for you?" he asked sweetly.

"What are the chances that you could come watch a movie with me without bringing Erin?" I asked.

"Um that's going to be like a 99 no and maybe a 0.2 yes."

I laughed. "Eddie you realize that doesn't add to a hundred, right?"

He paused. "Well it does now. Listen you should come to dinner with us."

"'Us' as in you and Erin?"

"Yes that is currently the only 'us' I am apart of," he replied mockingly.

"No what about that lovely friend of yours?"

"Me and Darcy are in a bit of a fight at the moment," he replied but still made it sound lighthearted.

"Uh-oh trouble in paradise?"

"How cruel. Now you're coming to dinner whether you like it or not."

"I'm so not coming."

"We'll be at you house in ten minutes! You better be ready," he said then hung up before I could say no again.

He showed up at my door and practically dragged me out his car and shoved me in the back seat. I grudgingly sat there. "Lizzy say hi to Erin," he commanded as if I was four.

"'Lo Erin."

"Hi Lizzy," she said shakily.

"Ok so I know that neither of you is that mad at the other so you can both drop the whole wounded kitten act," Eddie said pulling out of my driveway.

Erin snorted really loudly and then accidentally farted.

Of course this led to us all cracking up until out heads almost fell off.

"Lovely isn't she?" Eddie pointed out smiling at Erin.

I rolled my eyes. "If you two start that up I'll jump out of this car even when it's moving."

Erin smiled. "The sad part is she would."

"Would not!" I replied mock-indignant. "I always wait until Darcy stops before I jump out."

Erin laughed.

"Well that's saying something I suppose," Eddie added still smiling.

And that's how it was just left. No more madness at Erin and no more working over 30 hours a week for me.

Goodbye January…

Thursday, January 30

It turns out I'm truly good at Chemistry. I should be a chemist. Make drugs and test them on people and all that fun stuff.

My first lab rat would definitely have to be Fitz.

"Lizzy I can't be your lab partner anymore," he said as I first walked into Chemistry today.

I stopped in my tracks. "What? Why?"

He shrugged. "You see I have my eye on this girl and she said she'll be my lab partner and you can have hers."

"You're just going to ditch me for some pretty girl?" I asked honestly hurt.

He sighed. "There's more to it than that but if that's how you'd like to put it…"

"Can I have permission to laugh at you when you don't graduate on time because you failed?" I asked scowling and trying to cover up my sense of abandonment.

"As much as your little body can handle," he replied smiling secretly.

I sighed and blew the hair out of my eyes. "Fine just go," I muttered.

"Don't worry you'll thank me later," he replied as I cast my eyes down to my paperwork and shuffled through the day's lab procedure.

About two minutes later I felt a towering presence over me and looked up only to find Will.

I quickly looked across the room to where Fitz and Janie were pretending not to be watching us and stood up from my lab stool in frustration. I didn't say a word, but I didn't complain either just started to work through the chemicals looking for the bottle of Silver nitrate and shoving a beaker in Darcy's direction.

He just looked at me blankly.

"Fill it with 50 milliliters," I said simply and he quickly rushed to the sink to fill it after he recovered from the shock of the whole circumstance.

That may have been all I said but it was enough for him to know that he wasn't written off completely. He asked me questions about other things he should do and I'd just nod or shake my head accordingly.

I let the door open back up because despite how much I try to protest or deny it Will really did seep through those little crack in my hard exterior to the point where I could never kick him back out. The worst part of it is that he made me like him. He made loose control, for the first time, over an entire part of me.

How could he not?

Hey well that's that. I'm almost done. Not really almost but only about three maybe four chapters left.

I liked how this one ended because Lizzy gave up so much just to confess that. It's a big thing for her. I also like how she only referred to him as Darcy when she was either upset or referring to him with Janie, otherwise he was Will. Just a little something I thought was cute. :)

You know what else I think is cute? Reviews.