§ § § - June 29, 2001
Leslie changed her clothes and laid out Christian's while he was showering, and was just brushing her hair when he emerged from the bathroom in a cloud of soap-scented steam, faintly trailing his unique cologne. "Aha," she said, "so there really was a human being under all that filth. You must have turned the water black."
"You little tease," Christian said affectionately, removing the brush from her hand and tossing it carelessly aside. "I think there's no fear of contaminating you now, so be quiet and let me put those lips to a better use." He pulled her into his arms and kissed her deeply; in no time at all they were lost.
When he eventually drew back, she whispered dreamily, "Welcome back, my love."
Christian caressed her lower lip with his tongue and whispered back, "You brought me back, you know…and I love you more than ever for it." Once more he kissed her.
They were on the edge of losing track of time and utterly forgetting anything but each other, when a voice yelled from outside the room, "Are you finished yet, Christian? We have perhaps five minutes before we must leave, and the cars are waiting for us already."
Christian pulled back from Leslie with a jerk and blew out his breath. "Må sanktarna hålla plass till mej." He saw her grin and amended, "For us both. It's funny, but I think Arnulf would have understood completely."
Leslie nodded. "So do I," she said. "Unfortunately, nobody else will, so I guess you'd better get dressed before Carl Johan decides to break the door down." With a laugh, Christian conceded to her advice, and swiftly donned his little-used black royal military dress uniform. Leslie herself was wearing an understated black dress with matching shoes, her only jewelry her wedding rings and the ruby necklace Christian had given her for her birthday, which she wore almost all the time.
Once dressed, Christian ducked into the bathroom and gave his hair a vigorous rubbing with a fresh hand towel, shook his head hard a few times and then sighed. "They'll just have to accept my wet hair. My Rose, is there a comb out there somewhere?" Leslie brought him the hairbrush he'd thrown aside earlier, making him grin at her, and he put his glossy dark-brown hair in order. "Oh, and my wedding ring…"
"Right here." Leslie smirked at him and displayed it before his eyes.
"Mind-reader." Christian kissed her quickly, took it from her and slid it on. "That's it, then. Let's go." He offered her his arm, and she linked hers through it and walked into the corridor with him. Carl Johan nodded approval.
"Good," he said. "By the way, it's begun to rain."
"That figures," Christian said. "I assume the cemetery has prepared accordingly."
"They should have," Carl Johan said, falling into step on the other side of Christian so that they walked three abreast down the hall. "Anna-Kristina has done an admirable job these last few days, continuing her role as Arnulf's secretary. She made all arrangements for the memorial service and the funeral, helped Kristina handle responses to condolences and notifications of the arrival of all guests from abroad, and even kept the servants calm. She should serve Gabriella well after the coronation."
Christian nodded, impressed. "Good for her. Maybe she's finally learning some self-reliance—she seems to be showing true strength here." They descended the staircase and made their way out to the great entry, where the rest of the family was gathered, waiting for them. Anna-Kristina detached herself from the group and hugged Christian hard.
"I'm so glad you're back to normal again," she said fervently. "Gerhard and Rudolf told us the whole story. Why would you go to the dungeon?"
"Not now, Anna-Kristina," Carl Johan said before Christian could tell her the same thing. "Perhaps tomorrow, when things are a little quieter. We simply must get going."
Christian turned to Leslie. "Obviously this is going to be another televised event," he told her. "If you see helicopters outside the car windows, that will be the media, seeing to it that the entire world doesn't miss a single move we make. The memorial will be on television as well, and I think the funeral will be too…Anna-Kristina?"
"I couldn't stop them," she said. "I asked if the funeral could be broadcast only in Lilla Jordsö, though. Our people have the right to grieve with us, but I don't think the rest of the world really needs to see it. I only hope they listened to me."
"We'll find out," Carl Johan said. By now they had all filed outside; there were two cars waiting, one for Kristina, Carl Johan and Amalia, Christian and Leslie, and Anna-Laura; the other for Anna-Kristina, Gabriella and Elias, Margareta, Gerhard and Liselotta, Rudolf, Cecilia and Axel, and Roald. Once in the first car and moving down the long castle drive, Leslie finally got a good look at Kristina, whom neither she nor Christian had seen since the moment they'd joined the other Enstads in seclusion at the castle. Kristina was a bit pale and solemn-faced, but appeared composed; when she caught Leslie's eye, she smiled faintly and reached out to grasp Leslie's hand for just a moment.
Anna-Laura studied her younger brother. "Christian, are you all right?" she asked with particular meaning.
Christian said quietly, "If you mean have I regained my sanity, then I'm quite back to normal, thank you. I won't pretend that everything is perfect—I still haven't come to terms with the fact that I even entertained the idea of Arnulf's death. But Leslie grounded me." He shifted enough to wrap his arm around Leslie's shoulders.
Kristina said something, and Christian smiled and nodded slowly, his eyes misting. Anna-Laura tramslated, "Kristina said that you're a gift from fate, Leslie. If it weren't for you, Christian might be altogether something different from the prince we once knew before he was thrown into marriage with Marina."
Leslie wished she could think of something gracious to say; she could feel her face getting hot with embarrassment. Finally she said softly, "I love him…that's all there is to it."
"That's all there needs to be," Christian said, hugging her for a moment.
The group was silent after that; Carl Johan and Christian clung to their wives' hands, and Kristina and Anna-Laura seemed to share a wordless understanding. That allowed the chopping noise of helicopters overhead to be heard, and they all exchanged wry, knowing glances. There would be no privacy here, to be sure.
The scene of the memorial service was a massive Lutheran church on the eastern side of Sundborg; limousines and official cars in both black and white, along with what appeared to be every patrol car on the city police force, choked the roads as far as they could see. The royal family's two-car cavalcade was instantly recognized and allowed through, crawling along the roadway between endless lines of parked cars and occasionally stopping to let people cross the street. Parking in the church lot was severely restricted; two spaces had been reserved for the Enstads' cars toward the back so that they could enter unmolested through a rear door. The family had a police escort inside; Leslie shot Christian a look that conveyed utter, overwhelmed bewilderment, and he promptly curled a protective arm around her and kept it there until they were seated in the pew reserved for them.
"You're not used to this at all, my Rose, are you?" Christian murmured sympathetically when she laid her head on his shoulder. "It's not an easy thing, having your every emotion broadcast to all the world. But think of poor Kristina, and the girls, grieving as they are. I think Kristina is worse off than any of the rest of us."
"I wish I knew jordiska," Leslie said. "I feel as if I'm being rude, since I can't talk to her. I think that's why I'm so uneasy…it's not the media exposure, it's the feeling that I'm an intruder here, somehow."
Christian huddled her close. "Now, you know better than that, my darling. You're my wife, did you forget? You're as much an Enstad as any of the rest of us, even if you're still the newest family member. Don't let anyone make you feel that you don't belong. You do, and if there's any doubt, I'll set them straight without further ado. Kristina knows why you weren't able to come and see her—Carl Johan explained everything to her."
"Oh," Leslie murmured, looking sheepishly at him. "You must really think I'm being silly. I can't blame you."
"I think you're beautiful," Christian whispered and kissed the top of her head. "I love you, you know, no matter how silly you think you are. Just stay with me, you'll be fine."
They talked a little from time to time, sitting there waiting for all the mourners to file in and take their seats. Once Leslie sneaked a cautious glance behind them over Christian's shoulder, trying to see if she recognized anyone, but the endless faces were all unfamiliar and a little intimidating to her. When she turned back around, she noticed that Christian was watching her with open amusement. "Did you see anyone you know?"
"Like who?" she asked innocently.
He grinned. "Like Queen Michiko, for example?"
She knew she must be turning red at being caught out, but gave him a look of overdone affrontery. "Well, who else would I be looking for?" Christian began to laugh, trying his best to keep it under control, and hugged her briefly.
"We better watch it…I think we're on the edge of being irreverent," Leslie whispered into his ear, and Christian promptly dissolved into a coughing fit from nearly choking on his laughter. Beside them, Carl Johan gave them a startled look, but Amalia was smiling broadly at them, clearly understanding them.
Finally it was time for the memorial service, and Christian and Leslie settled into the same solemn silence as the other Enstads, holding hands for mutual support while the minister spoke and several very prominent world leaders delivered brief eulogies. One of these was King Errico, with Queen Michiko at his side; Michiko caught Leslie's eye and the two friends traded very quick smiles of greeting.
Kristina then arose, with Anna-Kristina, Gabriella and Elias, and Margareta behind her, and walked up to take her turn at saying a few words. She didn't get far before the tears began to flow; Anna-Kristina, her emotions as always right out there for all to see, promptly followed her mother's lead, with big tears rolling down her cheeks. Her two sisters were silent, but their faces were filled with sorrow. Elias stood behind Gabriella with his hands on her shoulders. When Kristina finished speaking, Carl Johan and Amalia arose next, followed by Gerhard with Liselotta and then Rudolf. Carl Johan delivered his eulogy to his brother first in jordiska, then in English; he too kept it short.
Anna-Laura then got to her feet and started up front, with Cecilia, Axel and Roald trailing her. Only when she reached the podium did she look up, and spoke about some favorite memories she had of Arnulf, also in both jordiska and English.
That left Christian and Leslie; her stomach rolled nervously and she clung tightly to his hand. She felt an absurd relief that she didn't have to say anything, and then wondered what Christian had in mind. Though she had no idea where the television cameras were, she nevertheless kept her eyes on Christian, who for the first time had a lost look about him.
Taking his brother's and sister's leads, Christian spoke slowly in his native language, without focusing on anyone in particular. Toward the end of his speech Leslie heard her own name and fielded a quick glance from him; then he hesitated, cleared his throat and switched to English.
"I had to think very hard about what I should say here today," Christian said, as if he had to choose his words. "And I am afraid I had to come up with those words in the space of a mere half hour or less. Arnulf's passing came as a great shock to me. To all of us, of course, but in my case I think it was a bit different. My brother and I had a somewhat strained relationship, as has been revealed in the press during the last year or so. When my wife and I came here a few days ago at his request, I had no idea what I should expect. He had been asking to see me. I will be forever grateful that he and I made our peace before he died. As it was, I lost my way, mentally, for a little while.
"I can only say that I am grateful to Arnulf for letting me join the love of my life, for it was Leslie who brought me back. She has been my anchor in these last few crazy days, and it's been with her help that I have been able to accept Arnulf's death and to wish him well in whatever journey he may now be making. We will miss you, Arnulf, all of us." He looked down, tugged gently once at Leslie's hand and stepped down; she automatically fell in by his side. When he took his place at the end of the family line, he turned all at once to Leslie and hugged her hard. "It was worse than I thought," he whispered to her and swallowed thickly, then began to cry silently, his body spasming against hers with gentle sobs.
"It's all right, my darling," Leslie soothed him quietly, returning his hug in equal measure and slowly caressing his back. She supposed, privately, that they were probably the center of attention for all those TV cameras out there, but she was past caring. All that mattered now was Christian.
She watched surreptitiously over his shoulder as she comforted him, while the minister spoke again at some length. For once Leslie was grateful for wordy preachers, for it gave him time to regain his composure. By the time the pallbearers—Carl Johan, Christian, Gerhard, Rudolf, Roald and Elias—were required to go forth and shoulder the king's coffin, he was ready to do his share of the duty. Just before joining his brother and nephews, he cast her a quick smile of gratitude, which she returned.
Anna-Laura and Kristina walked immediately behind the pallbearers with the coffin; in their wake were Amalia and Leslie, and behind them in twos, Anna-Kristina and Gabriella, Margareta and Liselotta, with Axel and Cecilia bringing up the rear. Though there had been no time for anyone, even Christian, to brief her on procedure, she had seen a few similar funerals on television in the past, and was prepared to follow the lead of those around her. She kept an eye on Christian ahead of her in order to focus.
An enormous hearse waited out front, a Rolls-Royce in fact, as Leslie noticed with some surprise. It reminded her once more that royalty was different from ordinary people, and again she felt out of place. The women and Axel stopped just at the end of the walk leading to the church steps, waiting while the six pallbearers carefully deposited the coffin into the back of the hearse and then stepped back, straightening to their full heights and watching in tightly controlled silence while the driver closed the hearse and went around to the front, preparatory to leading the funeral procession.
In front of them Kristina suddenly broke down into helpless weeping; Anna-Laura hugged her sister-in-law, visibly trying with little success to control her own tears. An odd weight settled over Leslie's chest and she thought for a moment that she might have trouble breathing. The pallbearers came back to join the others, and to Leslie's relief they paired off; Christian wordlessly slid an arm around Leslie's waist and ushered her along, falling into step behind his brother, sister and two sisters-in-law with the others following. Relieved for his presence, she relaxed slightly and felt the weight recede.
Once more they split into the same two groups for the trip to the cemetery. No one said a word all the way there, and unfortunately it was a rather long trip, back through the city and up the coastal route to a village known as Ormslandning—or, as Christian told Leslie when he spoke at last, Ormsvärd's Landing, the purported site where Lilla Jordsö's first king and his band of followers had come ashore from their legendary swim. It was here that all the Enstad ancestors were buried. Leslie had expected the cemetery to be quite large; in actual fact it covered about two acres and still wasn't full. By now she was very uneasy and a little afraid for Christian, for he looked withdrawn and very somber.
Once they had alighted from the car and were walking towards the gravesite in the rain, Leslie finally dared turn to him. "Christian, my love?" she whispered. "Are you sure you'll be all right?"
Christian looked at her as if mildly startled, then quirked a fleeting smile and nodded. "I ask only that you hold me," he said softly.
Her hand, settled on his waist, rose to caress his back again, and she nodded. "You know I will," Leslie said. "Anything you ask, my darling."
Christian tightened his hold on her but dropped back into silence, and she subsided, not completely reassured. It was new for her to see this side of him, and she fervently hoped his lingering disquiet over his reactions to Arnulf's death wouldn't overcome him as it had earlier that day.
Unlike the memorial service, the funeral was private—only the Enstads, along with Rudolf's girlfriend Liliana, and about two dozen family friends whom Leslie had never met. As the funeral service progressed, she found her mind skipping to one inane topic after another: wondering how many of these family friends Christian, personally, considered his friends; wishing it would stop raining; thinking it might be a good idea to call Roarke as soon as they'd returned to the castle. They were standing under a canopy to keep them relatively dry, but the day was perfectly suited to the overall mood. Leslie stood fully in Christian's embrace, her arms wrapped firmly around him, both of them staring at the coffin but only half seeing it. She could feel tremors deep within him again.
The lowering of the coffin into the grave was excruciating and seemed to take forever. Just as the family finished dropping flowers in atop the coffin, there was a vivid flash of lightning and, a bare second later, a crack of thunder. Startled exclamations rang out; Leslie emitted a cry of fright and buried her face in Christian's shoulder.
"Herregud," she heard Christian say, and then he kissed the top of her head and began to rock her just a little. As the first surge of terror subsided, she realized his internal tremors were gone, and a thread of relief at this snaked through her before another roar of thunder sounded and made her cringe against him. Now she was the one trembling.
Behind her someone asked Christian a question in jordiska, and he replied with a trace of amusement in his voice, running his hand up and down her back. Low chuckles sounded; she felt Christian's resonate through her and was curiously comforted by this. Then, unexpectedly, Christian tugged gently at her hair, making her look up. "My turn to ask," he said, smiling. "Are you going to be all right, my Rose?"
Lightning flared around them. "No," she cried and clutched him again; out of nowhere Christian burst into laughter over the thunder.
"You're truly priceless, my darling," he said, holding her tightly. "I guess I should have explained to Arnulf that you're frightened of thunderstorms. I honestly think this is his way of telling me goodbye—he knew how much I enjoy them."
"Well, tell him not to say it so damn loud," Leslie retorted, shivering, and again Christian laughed and squeezed her, rocking her back and forth from one foot to the other.