Walking into school on Monday was a humbling experience. Although the damaged property had been restored and everything physical looked as it had before the shooting, the air was choked with a sombreness that forbade smiles and cheer. Even Ashley felt subdued by the overwhelming quiet as she waited for the bell to ring.

Fidgeting with the strap of her bag, Ashley kept her eyes trained on the parking lot, determined not to let Spencer run away again. Just as she was about to give up and corner Spencer at lunch, the Carlins drove up and Spencer crawled out of the car, her eyes darting around as if she was the new kid all over again.

Hopping off the table, Ashley clattered toward the parking lot, cringing at the sound of her heels hitting the ground. "Spencer!"

When Spencer looked up, she caught Ashley's eye and immediately her features hardened. Shifting her gaze from Ashley, she veered off in the other direction, shoulders set with purpose.

"Spencer, wait!"

As Spencer rounded a corner, the bell rang, piercing the heavy air with its disrespectful clamour. Cursing, Ashley doubled her speed and almost slipped as she took the turn around the corner. She shrieked when she fell just short of running Spencer down.

"Oh god, you scared me."

"What do you want, Ashley?" With her arms folded and her mouth turned down into a scowl, Spencer had affected a stony demeanour unlike anything Ashley had ever seen.

Gulping, Ashley felt a lump rising in her throat. Now that Spencer was here, she wished she'd taken the time to figure out what she was going to say. "I—can we talk?"

"I don't know if there's anything you can say that I want to hear," Spencer said, her voice even, though Ashley could detect a hint of emotion behind her steely expression.

"Can you just let me say what I want to say?" Ashley pleaded, struggling to keep her tone from escalating as the students around them began dispersing.

Spencer stared back at Ashley, unblinking, for a painful moment. Then she began walking. "Fine. Mrs. Lee's not coming in today, so the chem lab's empty," she said, without turning back to look at Ashley.

Trailing after Spencer, Ashley felt her pulse slamming against the inside of her head. What was she going to say? I'm sorry, Spencer? I'm sorry I'm such a bitch? Can't we just make up and make out and forget everything that happened?

Somehow, Ashley didn't think any of those options would cut it.

Peering around a bank of lockers, they made sure the coast was clear before slipping into the chem lab and closing the door. They made their way to the back of the room, away from the windows.

Leaning against a cupboard, Spencer folded her arms again and raised her eyebrows. "So?"

I am so screwed. "I'm sorry, Spence," Ashley said quietly, almost afraid to meet Spencer's eye.

"What are you sorry for?"

"I …"

"You don't have to be sorry that you like Aiden," Spencer said, her words laced with a venom Ashley didn't know she possessed.

Running her fingers through her hair, Ashley tugged at the ends, frustrated. "I was … He caught me off guard, okay? It was a weak moment."

"That's not the point!" Spencer spat, throwing up her hands. "You know who you like, and you should be able to answer straight away without having to think about it."

Feeling the blood drain from her face, Ashley braced herself against a table and swallowed, hard.

"If you can't even decide now, then …" Spencer's words trailed off, and she sagged against the cupboard, looking drained.

"I know I messed up, okay? I know I'm still a mess," Ashley put in, her voice quavering.

"That's not an excuse."

"No, it's not," Ashley admitted, the growing sense of helplessness coiling tight around her chest until she felt like all she could eke out were a bunch of platitudes—desperate, empty pleas to bide time.

"It's not about how messed up you are, or how much Aiden likes you, or how much I like you," Spencer said, her voice cracking toward the end. "It's about who you want—me or Aiden."

"It's not that simple," Ashley protested, hating the way her voice came out in a shrill pitch.

"Yes, it is. You choose. And that's it. You can't have everything."

"Why does this have to be so hard?"

"Because it's not worth anything if it isn't."

Her vision blurring, Ashley fought to keep the tears from falling as she gripped the edge of the table, her knuckles whitening with the intensity.

"Do you think it's easy for me?" Spencer continued, no longer trying to keep the hurt from showing. "Do you think it's easy for me to look into your eyes and see that I'm not the one you want?"

"I do want you, Spence."

"Do you?" She shook her head and let out a small, bitter laugh. "Maybe you do. But you also want Aiden."

Braving the glimmering heat of Spencer's gaze, Ashley looked into her eyes. "I can't just cut him out of my life."

"Well, you have to do something. Because you can't have us both."

Silenced, Ashley turned her head, fixing her eyes on her shoes. She knew Spencer was right. Spencer was always right. Pushing herself away from the table, she began pacing, desperately searching for a foothold, some sane thought to hold on to. But she found none and went for the one thing she knew wouldn't help, no matter how much of it she had. "Can't I have some time?"

"No."

Taken aback, Ashley halted and spun on her heel. "What?"

"No, you can't have some time," Spencer repeated. "I can't wait around for you to make pros-and-cons lists to decide who you want to be with." Then, in a smaller voice, she said, "It hurts too much. Seeing you every day and not being with you hurts too much. If you can't decide, I'm leaving."

"What do you mean?" The panic was now millimetres away from the surface, seconds away from spilling over and drowning her.

"My mum thinks it would be good for me to transfer to another school. Maybe she's right."

"No, you can't!" With those words, the dam broke, and Ashley gave up all pretence of being rational and mature. "You can't leave! I love you, Spence."

"Don't say it if you don't mean it," Spencer said, glancing away.

"Please don't give up on me—on us."

Bridging the gap between them, Ashley reached out to touch Spencer's hand, but Spencer flinched and recoiled, looking pained.

"Please don't go," Ashley implored, frantically searching Spencer's anguished eyes for a trace of hope.

"Give me a reason to stay."

"We need to talk."

"I can't deal with this right now."

Clenching his jaw, Aiden lifted a crutch, blocking Ashley's way.

"What's your problem?" Ashley barked.

"Can you please stop doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"Saying I'm being a jerk for not being around and then avoiding me," Aiden replied. "We've all had time to cool off, okay? So now I think we should talk."

Grudgingly, Ashley sat down on a bench. Aiden followed suit, emitting a small grunt and leaning his crutches against the table.

"So, what's so important? 'Cause I hate hanging around after school for no reason."

"What about us? What about what I said to you at prom?"

Stifling a groan, Ashley shifted to face Aiden, noticing the stubble darkening his jaw. There were bags under his eyes and his shirt was wrinkled. Feeling a pang, she relaxed her features and took a deep breath.

"You know I love you, but what we had is in the past. I'm—I'm not attracted to you in that way. Not anymore."

"Then why did you hesitate that night?"

"You caught me off guard, that's all. Plus it was prom, so … I guess I felt a little nostalgic," she said, flashing a tiny smile.

"I don't think so," Aiden said tersely. "What about all that crap you gave me about not being close enough?"

"I did miss you, but not in the way you're thinking. I don't know. Maybe somewhere along the way, my signals got mixed or something."

Instead of replying, Aiden hung his head, staring at the ground between his feet. Exhausted, Ashley could only allow the silence to envelop them. Moving her eyes to the parking lot, she watched an old Mercedes pull up and a tall girl step out of it. Leaning against her car, the girl tossed her keys up and down as she scanned the school compound, clearly waiting for someone.

Two minutes later, Ashley's jaw dropped when she saw Glen and Spencer stroll up to the girl. Studying them more intently, she could tell that Glen was clearly trying to hook up with her. But what Glen didn't see was the way the girl was giving Spencer an extra smile or two.

Those aren't friendly smiles, Ashley thought, glowering at the girl.

"Who's that?" she asked Aiden, pointing with her index finger.

Uninterested, Aiden lifted his head for a fraction of a second before dropping it again. "No idea."

"She's totally flirting with Spencer!"

"So?" Aiden muttered irritably.

"So?" Ashley shot him an incredulous look. "So look at her! She's all legs and boobs!"

Once again, Aiden glanced up. "They're not that big," he observed dryly.

"Exactly! They're perfect," Ashley pointed out, as if she was stating the obvious.

"Why do you care?"

"Because—because Spencer is totally letting Jessica Alba over there flirt with her."

"Whatever," Aiden said through gritted teeth. He stood up, fumbling with his crutches. "We'll talk when you stop obsessing."

As Aiden limped away, Ashley felt jealousy and possessiveness lance through her body. Just as a plan to steal Spencer away from Jessica began to formulate in her mind, the three of them hopped into the Mercedes and sped off.

Fuming, Ashley stalked over to her car, her mind overflowing with indignant disbelief. Getting into the sun-warmed interior of the Cayenne, the disbelief quickly morphed into hurt. What if Spencer really was through with her? What if Spencer was interested in that girl and wanted to leave Ashley for her? Clutching the steering wheel, she remembered all the stupid things she'd pulled not only when she was with Spencer, but also when she was trying to be with her. What if she'd pushed Spencer too far? What if this was the final straw?

Closing her eyes, Ashley had to remind herself that Spencer was only human. Patience of a saint or not, everyone had a breaking point. Her heart thudded painfully against her ribcage as she wondered if she'd finally driven Spencer to her breaking point.

"Honey, I'm home," Ashley said tiredly as she entered the foyer. Her voice ricocheted off the walls, coming back to her ears in a dull tone. Dropping her bag on the floor, she trudged toward the kitchen, praying that no one had touched the pint of Ben and Jerry's in the fridge. Nearing the massive, spotless kitchen which her mother had probably never set foot into, she heard a sniffle.

When she entered the kitchen, Kyla was sitting on the floor with the phone clutched in one hand.

"What's going on?"

Hearing Ashley's voice, Kyla's head snapped up, but she quickly looked away, wiping her eyes with the back of her free hand.

"I—I have to go," Kyla said into the phone, clicking it off and standing up.

"What was that about?" Ashley asked, feeling more curious than sympathetic.

"Um …" Brushing her hair out of her eyes with a shaky hand, Kyla opened and closed her mouth several times. "I, um … Remember the website?"

"Yeah," Ashley said, drawing out the word and narrowing her eyes.

Eyes flitting around nervously, Kyla moved to the marble-topped island, stopping to fidget with the flowers in the centre. Her body was drawn tight, every muscle in her face screaming in anxiety.

"You were saying?" Ashley prodded impatiently.

"Please don't yell at me," Kyla said softly. "I swear I had no idea she did this."

"Who did what?"

Sucking in a lungful of air, Kyla finally dared to meet Ashley's eye. Then, in the tiniest voice ever—so quiet Ashley could've sworn it was just the air whispering—Kyla said, "My mum faked the DNA report."

Nailed to the floor, Ashley stood in the middle of her expensive, unused kitchen, not a hair twitching. Kyla had ducked her head and moved to the other side of the island, farther away from Ashley. A minute or a week passed—Ashley had no idea. All she could see was the shame in Kyla's body language. Still rooted to her spot, Ashley stared until she felt as if her eyes were going to pop. Then it came. The surge of betrayal and disbelief and raw anger funnelled upward through her system, setting every nerve ending on fire. It blew through every valve and stop and crashed out of her mouth in an untrammelled, irrevocable scream.

"Get out of MY house!"