Hi everyone!
Good news. I've been able to write some on this story lately, so I will be updating a little more frequently the next couple of days/weeks. For you who showed your concern about my hip condition. Thank you so much for caring. I've just visited a specialist and he's told me that I probably have something called hip dysplasia, which means that the head of femur (the bone in the thigh) slides up on the edge of the hip socket and then back in again. The only thing that is preventing my hip from dislocating completely is the muscles around the hip. To fix this, I will need to go through a major operation where they move my whole pelvis. After that I basically have to learn to walk again because I'm going to be in a cask for several months afterwards. But I'm relieved to finally know what is wrong with me.
Enough about me. Let's get back to the story…
Elementalmoon, roswellmaxandliz, spikes-storm and RoswellGurl1505 – Thank you so much for the feedback! It's really really appreciated!
Chapter 34
Alex slowly pressed down the handle and winced as the door
screeched slightly when he pushed it inwards. The room, which he stepped into
as slowly and quietly as he could, was dark, but by the light that was shining
in from the hallway, the streak of light reaching the end of the bed and
brushing up against the covers, he could see the contours of her figure in the
bed.
"Isabel? Honey?"
"Go away," came the mumbled reply.
"Don't be like this, Is. You know that Liz is only trying
to hel-"
"I don't want to hear about Liz. I don't want to hear how
nice she is and how caring she is! Leave me alone, Alex!"
"Now you're just being ridiculous, Is. Just listen to
yourself." Carefully, Alex stepped further into the room and got closer to the
bed. As the shadow of his long lean body fell over her bundled up body, she
pulled the comforter even further up to her ears, turning her back fully
against him.
"I don't want to hear it, Alex. Just leave."
There was a twinge of sadness in her voice, of resignation,
that could've stopped anyone else but Alex from pushing any further. But Alex
knew his wife by now. At the beginning of their marriage, he had stopped by
now; afraid that he would hurt her if he pushed any further. But he knew by
now, after three years of marriage, that this was the point at when he needed
to dig deeper because it was now that Isabel was open enough for anyone to talk
some reason into her.
He slowly sat down on the edge of the bed and heard her
tired sigh follow.
"Everyone is so grateful for what you've done, Isabel. But
you have to realize that you can't take care of Max on your own, you need
help."
When she didn't respond, he knew that he had hit the right
nerve and he leaned over her, brushing a strand of her blonde hair away from
her forehead. Stubbornly, she slightly pulled away from his touch, but he knew
her too well to take her movement seriously. She was just doing it to preserve
her pride.
"Liz cares just as much as you about Max. She's just trying
to help as well. She's doing what she thinks is the right thing to do. She's
only human, Isabel. Just like you. You can't possibly know what to do in a
situation like this, Is; no one can."
"She hasn't been by his side for two years," Isabel
whispered, pain in her voice. "She hasn't seen him. She hasn't seen how badly
he has felt, how he has struggled. She doesn't know how much I've struggled to
help him."
"No, she hasn't," Alex said softly, lying down next to her
and snaking his arm around her waist. Quietly, he placed a kiss at the back of
her head. "You're so strong, Is. I get more impressed with you everyday. I
don't know anyone that is stronger than you, sweetie."
Her sobs broke through the darkness and his arm tightened
protectively around her waist.
"But you can't handle this on your own. No person is that
strong. You wouldn't let Max handle this on his own, would you? That's why he
could always count on you to be there. But maybe you have to leave some of the
responsibility to someone else."
"Another therapist?" she asked, broken.
"If that's what it takes, yes," Alex answered. "Both you
and I know that Max is not feeling good and you know that it's not Liz's fault.
He was not feeling well even before Liz stepped into his world; he was just
better at hiding it back then. You knew it, I knew it, even Michael knew it. Max
still needs you, Is. He needs your support and he needs you to be there by his
side as his sister, not as his caretaker. He's probably going to get worse
before he gets better and maybe this is it. Maybe his breakdown is a good
thing, if he gets your support now and not your fear and worry, Is. Let
him go, for him."
Silence lowered itself over the bed after Alex's words and
for a while he feared that he had not only crossed the line, but destroyed the
line altogether.
"When did you become so wise?" Isabel whispered and he felt
himself relax.
A relieved smile spread itself over his lips and he kissed
her cheek as he crawled closer to her. Her body turned in his arms and her
tearstained face turned to him, with red-brimmed eyes looking into his.
He gave her an encouraging smile while the pads of his
fingers removed the moisture from her cheeks.
"Why me?"
He frowned in his smile and laughed softly. "What?"
"Why me? Why did you choose me?"
"Because you're you. Because you entranced me from the
moment I saw you."
She smiled through the new tears and slightly shook her
head, as if she couldn't believe herself that he had chosen her out of all the
girls he could've fallen for. She buried her face in his chest.
"I love you, Alex. I love you so much."
"I love you too. You're my very own ice queen."
She smacked him lightly in the chest and her voice came out
muffled in Alex's shirt. "Don't push your luck, mister."
Alex grinned in her hair. "Me? Never."
-
Liz knocked softly on the wooden door. "Max?"
Her tentative voice drifted through the wood, into the room
on the other side. It drifted through the air towards the bed and brushed up
against his cheek to reach his ear. He stirred slightly, the dream world
blending with reality; the dream world which was refusing to let go off its
hold on him. But it was something about that voice that called him. Like a
bright beacon shining in the darkness. It was something about that voice that
made him want to wake up. And continue to stay awake.
"Max?"
He forced himself through the heavy mists of
unconsciousness and took a hold of the slippery threads hanging from the
elusive consciousness, pulling himself upwards just as Liz slowly opened the
door and the light from the outside sneaked into the room.
"Max? Are you awake?"
Her voice was soft and quiet, barely stirring the silence.
"I'm awake," he mumbled and his arm automatically reached
out in the air towards her.
Liz took his hand, ignoring the chills of pleasure running
up her arm that the contact of his skin against hers brought, and sat down on
the edge of the bed. She swallowed deeply as her eyes met his. His eyes were
dark and partly glazed over, as if he was struggling to stay with her. He
looked so lost that Liz's grasp on his hand automatically tightened.
"How are you feeling?"
He attempted a smile, but it quickly turned into the shadow
of a grimace. "Better."
Her own smile felt strained on her lips as she gave his
hand a squeeze. "I'm glad."
Her eyes were drawn to their entwined hands and as her
thoughts started to travel with her sudden nervousness, her other hand began to
unconsciously stroke the back of his hand.
"I need to talk to you about something, Max."
He nodded, somewhat wearily. "Sure."
"You have the final word, Max. We are not forcing you. But…"
She cleared her throat and met his eyes. "I don't think that the therapist you
have now is helping you. You don't seem to be feeling any better."
He nodded again. She searched his eyes, trying to figure
out what was going on behind those once so emotional deep eyes of his. When he
didn't respond in any other way than with his tired nod, she put her other hand
on top of his and enveloped his hand in the warmth between her two palms.
"Max?"
"Sure," he repeated again and a chill went through her. The
strongest feeling that she couldn't reach him slammed into her.
"Maybe someone else can help you, Max."
She knew that it would take a lot from him to change
therapist. He would have to tell his story all over again to another therapist,
but Liz couldn't see any other choice. Judging from how Max's eyes were
absently skittering around the room, without stopping at one point more than a
second, the therapist he had now wasn't helping him. He might even be making it
worse for Max.
The heavy cold thick blanket of silence lowered itself on
them again and Liz could feel the tears burning her eyes. But she wouldn't cry.
She needed to be strong for both of them. Then he looked straight at her,
straight into her heart, and the air got caught in her throat.
"I just need you," he whispered.
His whisper shook like an electrical current into her heart
but still her first rational thought concerned insecurity. Was the statement
directed at her or the former wife that was haunting his mind?
"I can't help you alone," she answered softly.
"I just need you," he repeated. "Please Liz…" A tear of
relief escaped the strict control she had held on her tears as her name rolled
off his lips.
"I want her out of my head and she's only gone when you're
here."
She could see him now. She could see the Max she had met at
the shopping mall that day when he had lost Michelle. She could see the
desperation in his eyes but also the hope…and love.
She swallowed hard and on instinct she let go off his hand
and instead brought her arms around him, pulling him towards her.
"I'll be with you the entire time," she whispered in his
ear.
"You will?"
Her response stuck in her throat at the mixture of
abandonment and hope characterizing his voice and she merely nodded her reply. She
pulled back a little and placed a kiss on the side of his neck. She could feel
his hands forming fists around her shirt and she sighed against his shoulder. She
would do anything to be here for him, if only Isabel would let her.
-
One week later
"Oh it's you," Isabel mumbled as Liz opened the door for
her.
Liz mustered up the last bit of patience in her body and
forced herself to smile. "Hi Isabel."
Isabel just gave her a short nod and brushed past Liz into
the house. Liz rolled her eyes. "Why don't you come in, Isabel?"
"Where's Max?" Isabel asked putting the bags that were
hanging from her hands on the counter by the sink.
Liz closed the door behind Isabel and slowly walked towards
Isabel. "He's actually at the therapist."
Isabel spun around, a frown settling on her smooth
forehead. She brushed a blonde tendril of hair out of her eye and captured Liz
with her cold eyes. "You found a new one?"
Liz nodded cautiously. She could see how Isabel's body
tensed and she had learnt from the short period of time that she had known
Isabel that the motion was usually followed by barely restrained anger.
"Why haven't you told me?"
"We just found one. I was just about to call you, but then
I realized that you would probably come over anyway," she couldn't help the
acid that sneaked into her voice as she gave Max's sister a sarcastic smile,
"and right I was."
Isabel's brown eyes grew darker. "Don't try to be smart
with me, Elizabeth. He's my brother and I should know what's happening with
him. Just because he for some reason wants you here, doesn't mean that I
enjoy having you here. Got it?"
Liz sighed, deciding it was no use arguing with Isabel. The
situation with Isabel was tiresome and she never seemed to come to terms with
the fact that Liz was going to stay. Liz had decided a long time ago that she
would shut up and let Isabel throw her tantrums and order everyone around, if
it meant less worries for Max. Max didn't need to think about that Liz and his
sister weren't getting along, not on top of everything else.
"Of course, Isabel," Liz answered, loosely holding up her
hands in front of her in a sign of resignation.
Isabel's eyes narrowed, but she didn't say anything. She
turned around towards the bags and started unpacking.
"I shopped some groceries for Max," she said, placing the
products on the counter.
Liz had to bit her lip to stop herself from crying out in
frustration and she was glad that Isabel was standing with her back towards
her. There didn't seem to be an end to how far Isabel would go to show Liz that
she wasn't a part of Max's life and never would be.
"You don't have to do that, Isabel. I shopped yesterday."
"I know," Isabel said, her voice still cold and her back
still turned towards Liz. "But I don't think you know what he likes yet. I'm
just helping you out a little, Liz."
Liz's fist tightened at the side of her body and she took a
deep breath and she had to struggle to get the next sentence out. "Thank you,
Isabel."
"That's nothing, Liz. You obviously need a little help."
Liz shut her eyes and pressed them tightly shut for a
couple of seconds before she without another word walked out of the kitchen.
"I'll just put the pasta in the other cabinet, Liz! I think
you've put the pasta in the wrong cabinet before!"
Liz hurried up the stairs and quickly closed the door
behind her as she reached the bedroom.
"Gaaaaaaah!" she screamed at the empty room. She picked up
the phone.
"She's driving me insane. She's driving me insane." Her
mumbles were repeated until Maria answered on the other side of the phone.
"Thank God!" Liz exclaimed.
"Liz? What's wrong?" Maria's concern-radar instantly shot
through the roof.
"A sane person," Liz said with relief.
"Yes, yes, I'm a sane person," Maria said confused, "It's
not what people usually call me, but I personally think so-"
"I don't know what to do about her. She's- she's-"
"Ahh…Isabel?" Maria guessed.
"She's starting to get on my nerves, Ria," Liz said, her
frustration barely restrained any longer.
"I'm actually surprised she hadn't gotten on your nerves
already," Maria said. "I've been annoyed with her just through what you've told
me about her."
"I don't know what to do anymore, Maria. I don't know what
to do. The last thing Max needs right now is for me to be fighting with his
sister. He needs both of our support."
"Yes, he does, but Liz, listen to me; you can't go on like
this. Don't you think that Max can feel the tension? He's no child. Even though
he seems closed off most of the time, I can assure you that he notices what's
going on."
Liz sank down on the bed and tiredly rubbed her face. "I
know, Maria. I've seen it. If both Isabel and I are in the room, he walks out. He
can't deal with it and that's what I don't want. I don't want him to have to
feel that he can't stand being in the same room as Isabel and I. I don't want
that."
"Of course you don't," Maria said. "You have to talk to
Isabel, Liz. Isn't Max with that therapist right now?"
"Uh-huh", Liz nodded even though Maria couldn't see her.
"Then take this opportunity to talk to Isabel. You need to
do it. Isabel needs to understand what she is doing to Max."
"But she must know that Max can feel the tension," Liz
murmured.
"Would she really keep doing this if she knew?" Maria
pointed out.
"I think she's just trying to confirm her position here. She
doesn't want me here, Ria."
"She just has to realize that you are not leaving, Lizzie. And
you have to tell her that. Give her an ultimatum or whatever, just get her to
listen to you."
"Okay," Liz took a deep breath. "Okay… You're right. I have
to talk to her. Max needs us more now than ever and we can't keep doing this."
"Exactly. It can't be good for your hea-"
"Don't say it, Ria," Liz said with a warning tone. "This is
not about me anymore, this is about Max."
She could hear Maria's silent protest on the other end. Of
course Maria was worried about what all this tension was doing to Liz's heart,
but Liz just couldn't start thinking about that as well. She had to focus on
getting Max well now.
"You're right," Maria said, swallowing her words of concern
for her best friend. "Just promise to take care of yourself as well, Lizzie. I
can't lose you."
"I will, I promise," Liz smiled. "Thank you, sweetie. Love
you."
"I love you too, Liz," Maria said warmly and then added
with a teasing voice, "Oh, and tell Isabel I said hi."
Liz's smile grew. "I probably won't. Bye."
"Bye-bye, babe."
TBC…
