Rated: G
"Decisions, Decisions"
"Scored almost a perfect on both the ACT and the SAT."
"Almost unnaturally bright."
"Strong-willed, able to work through so many tragedies in his life."
"Has his eye on the prize."
"A touch cynical, but that's understandable."
"We invite you to tour our campus."
"It would be an honor if you'd accept a tour of our campus."
"The president of the university will personally lead you on a tour."
"You are accepted."
"We are pleased to inform you that you've been accepted."
"Full-ride."
"Benefits."
"Nearly anything you want."
"We can offer more."
"Who can get me to the CIA fastest?"