Rated: PG-13 for language
"Speech"
"Well, I was asked to give an address tonight. I could stand up here and tell you all about how your lives stretch out in front of you like an eternity. I could tell you how you will all go forth and succeed in your degrees, and how I am sorry to leave this place and all my friends behind. I could even go on about the bonds of fellowship. I really could.
"But I won't. You don't want to hear that, and I don't want to say it. We're graduates now—fuck this speech and give me a drink."