This is Chapter seventeen my faithful readers. Deviating from the current storyline I give you completely random battles. Most likely the next few chapters will be exceptionally long. But please enjoy the battles.
Zelda and Peach
VS
Fox McCloud and Falco Lombardi
Kanto Skies: Poké Floats
"TEAM BATTLE!" boomed the announcer over the roar of the audience
Today's battle consisted of royalty vs. mercenary on the ever changing battle field of Kanto Skies: Poké Floats. The giant balloons that floated effortlessly in the sky far above Kanto filled the heavens with a brilliant display of colors and funny faces. A giant Pikachu balloon that flew into view sports four combatants. The StarFox team, consisting of Fox McCloud and Falco Lombardi and the princesses of The Mushroom Kingdom and The Kingdom of Hyrule, Princess Peach and Princess Zelda (respectively). The two teams glared each other down with steely eyed determination. The feet of the two teams shifted and contorted with the soft, yet durable material. Smiles crossed the face of Team StarFox as they were the first to initiate with snappy banter.
"Hope your dresses don't get mussed up in the battle. Wouldn't want 'em to get dirty or nothing." came Falco with a smart-alecky remark
Both princesses sneered at that wise-crack but retaliated with equal passion.
"Be care and don't fall. We all know you can not fly, being the turkey that you are." Peach retorted
"I'm no turkey!" Falco barked
"You could have fooled me." she replied with a smirk
Both Fox and Zelda could feel an oncoming headache from their teammate's child's play.
"Good luck Zelda."Fox told her exasperated
"I wish you the same Fox." she replied with a sigh
"3...2...1...GO!" the announcer boomed and with that the battle was on.
Ganondorf
VS
Ice Climbers
VS
Dedede
VS
Ness
Brimstar: Depths
"FREE FOR ALL!" roared the announcer
The audience stood in awe as Kraid, the giant reptilian monster made its appearance on the battle field to impose fear in its combatants.
"The smell of decay, unbearable heat, an unstable arena, and a sickening destructive creature in the background of it all to cause untold destruction." he mused "What a wonderful arena to battle in." he chortled, with a menacing glare in his eye.
"Why you talking to yourself big-nose?" Ness asked
"I have told you time and time again child, my name is Ganondorf. You will treat it with the proper respect or you will be on the receiving end of my foot to your hindquarters." he told Ness
Ness stuck he tongue out at him.
"It's too hot here." Nana complained
"I know, I'm burning up too. Couldn't they cool this place down or something?" Popo wondered
Being out of their element had a profound effect on the two Inuit children.
"Children." Ganondorf muttered
He still couldn't believe that mere children were a match for a person of his caliber. He was Ganondorf after all. How could children defeat him in battle? It was unconceivable...yet they have done it time and time again. However, today he was going to be victorious against these children and the big, hammer-wielding penguin who were his opponents.
"Prepare for defeat fools! Mhu ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, HA!" he laughed with a trademark evil laugh that sent a shiver down the spines of men. Then again, it had no affect on his opponents. Too bad not one of them was a man (per say). While his laugh made the very atmosphere tremble in its wake the others simple stood and stared in bewilderment.
"AHEM!" the announcer uttered, clearing his voice to gain Ganondorf's attention
"Oh..." Ganondorf tried to play it off as if it was nothing with a slight and pathetic cough, but it prove fruitless.
"Geez, you are weird big-nose." Ness commented
Ganondorf's eye twitch involuntarily.
"I shall end that child." he muttered
With a loud sigh the announcer commenced with his duties "3...2...1...GO!" he boomed, and Kraid erupted from the lava once again to let the fight commence with his deep throated deafening roar that shook the very foundations of the arena.
Link and Pikachu
VS
Young Link and Pichu
F-Zero Grand Prix: Big Blue
"TEAM BATTLE!" the announcer bellowed
The roar of engines could be heard in the distance as a big blue ocean sparkled as the rays of the gorgeous sun reflected off it. A giant race track that consisted of mostly an enormously long tube hung in the air, imposing great magnificence to all that would glimpse at it. Large, futuristic race-crafts could be seen, revving their engines and preparing to sped off at a moments notice. Finally, four fighters appeared on one of the most popular of his vicious machines of speed and power--The Blue Falcon--a vehicle of the famous Captain Falcon; winner of F-Zero races and Smash Brother extraodinary.
"You don't think Captain Falcon will crash, do ya?" Young Link asked his latter self
"I do not know what to think when it comes to these races Young Link. The best advice I could give you is to not fall off...and to watch out for my blade."
"I'm not worried about the battle. I just don't want to die in a fireball of death." Young Link retorted, brandishing his blade at the time. "With my buddy Pichu we'll mop the floor with you and Pikachu." he quipped
"Pi, it's time to fight!" cheered Pichu exuberantly.
However, he excited himself a little too much and electricity inadvertently flowed from his cheeks and gave his body a little jolt.
"Don't hurt yourself Pichu." came Pikachu, acting as his littler version's big brother
"I'm okay!" he yelled, trying in vain to prove he did not need assistance in keeping his awesome powers in check.
People tend to forget that Pichu was far more powerful than Pikachu (for some reason or other), yet had a far harder time controlling himself than his evolved form. As for Young Link, when it came to speed, he blew his older self out of the water and (because of a lighter body) could jump far higher than Link could any day. Nevertheless Link easily overpowered his young self and usually took the role as big brother, giving the younger noogies, wet-willies, or even worst...tunic wedgies (a female screams in the distance), which are far more painful than ordinary wedgies.
"Well, be careful Young Link. You know, should you sustain an immense injury it could follow up to adulthood and I would experience it." suggested Link.
Link was commonly cautious with just how much activity his younger self participated in. I would too if I had a younger version of myself that when something big happens to him, it happens to me. But in spite of Link's warnings, Young Link couldn't be bothered. It was not like something big would happen, like him losing a leg for instance. He was a Smasher, and he had the right to be treated as such.
"3...2...1...GO!" bellowed the announcer.
At the sound of the 'go', F-Zero machines blasted off from the starting line and swords and discharges of electrically energy could be seen flashing among them.
Kirby and Jigglypuff
VS
Samus and Mewtwo
Yoshi's Island
"TEAM BATTLE!" the announce proclaimed loudly
Nothing could have made Jigglypuff happier at the moment, except should this moment happen again. She and Kirby were selected to participate in a team-battle--their opponants; the world threatening psychic pokemon, the most powerful pokemon (cough--not--cough) the merciless Mewtwo and the intergalactic Metroid hunter, the femme fatale of bounty hunting, the sensational Samus Aron.
"This battle should be over rather quickly." Mewtwo commented
"I wouldn't be over-confident. They are small and easy to knock away but they're persistent. They won't be easy to KO." Samus informed
"We shall see." he replied
"Good luck Mewtwo and Samus." Kirby said from the other side of the pit.
"Luck will not be needed. We shall defeat you and do not expect any mercy on my behalf." replied Mewtwo
"Don't worry about him Kirby, and thanks, good luck to you two." Samus replied, ignoring her arrogant partner
"Thanks Samus." responded Kirby
"Oh, Jigglypuff, try not to gawk at Kirby the entire battle okay. You two can spend some quality time afterward, okay?" Samus half-joked
Jigglypuff turned a shade of red that covered her entire body as the brunt of that saying hit her dead on.
"Cool, I didn't know you could change color!" Kirby exclaimed, obviously impressed with her strange new chameleonic powers.
Ah, the power of being absolutely clueless about love (just like everyone's favorite pointy eared hyliean warrior.).
"Prepare...FOR DEFEAT!" Mewtwo shouted, stretching his arms out in an intimidating battle position
Kirby and Jigglypuff simply scratched their heads in confusion.
"Must you do that every time you do battle?" Samus asked, annoyed
Mewtwo chose to ignore her.
"3...2...1...GO!" proclaimed the announcer
Mr. Game 'n Watch
VS
Roy
VS
Captain Falcon
VS
Luigi
Infinite Glacier: Icicle Mountain
"FREE FOR ALL!" barked the announcer
Subzero temperatures, thinning air, uneasy slopes that could easily give, the threat of an avalanche, etc...just what the Smashers were looking for in a battle. Though the constant climb up the mountain during the battle was a bother, it didn't take away from the fast-paced action that the Smashers had grown accustomed to.
"Good luck to you Game 'n Watch." Roy praised as he unsheathed his Sword of Seals.
Game 'n Watch beeped a reply to the dragon-slayer, waving his two-dimensional hand in recognition.
"Somebody is gonna feel the burn today!" exclaimed Captain Falcon, raising a burning fist in the air proudly
"We shall see who burns who in this battle." Roy commented
"Your little sword ain't nothing compared to me. I'll snap it like a toothpick!" Falcon snapped
"I have not seen it happen yet, so it will not happen now!" Roy snapped back
"Get ready to fry!" Falcon proclaimed
"You'll taste my burning blade!" Roy replied
"You can't stop my burning ambition!"
"You can not stop destiny!"
"You..."
"ENOUGH!" barked the announcer.
He was fed up with the lack of concentration on the battle ahead and he wanted to start this. Sometimes it wasn't worth getting out of bed in the mornings.
"They are a both hot-heads. They will a end up burning one another if they are a not careful." Luigi mused, taking his position on one of the many frozen ledges. "But a little a heat could do a nicely." he commented, shivering slightly. The two Smashers in question quelled their argument until the battle commenced, glaring flames at one another that could light a furnace for weeks.
"3...2...1...GO!" the announcer barked, commencing battle.
From a distance, a giant blast of thermal energy could be seen radiating from the Smasher's current position, lighting the side of the mountain side in a translucent glow.