Terezi spun around a few times in her chair, cuddling a headless scalemate in her lap. She was starting to wonder if she should ask Karkat to sew a few of them back together for her, since she was quickly running out of helper detectives. Then again, Karkat was probably terrible at sewing. She'd ask Kanaya instead. Yes, that was definitely the better choice. If she asked Kanaya, they'd be as good as new!

A sly smile spread across her face. If she asked Kanaya, she might be able to convince her to make a few new ones, too. A few more cherry scalemates…

Trollian made its traditional screeching noise and she spun back to face the computer. She grinned wider. Finally!

[carcinoGeneticist has begun trolling gallowsCalibrator]

CG: HEY. I MISS YOU.

GC: 1 W4S W41T1NG FOR YOU NUBBY H3H3H3

CG: WAITING FOR ME TO SAY SOMETHING? AM I THAT PREDICTABLE?

Her reply was instant.

GC: Y3S!

CG: OH FUCK OFF. I DO MISS YOU.

GC: H3H3H3

GC: Y3S 1 M1SS C4NDY 4PPL3S TOO

CG: GLAD TO FUCKING KNOW.

CG: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU UP TO?

GC: 1 W4S JUST T4LK1NG W1TH ER1D4N!

It wasn't a lie, really. Eridan had been talking to her a few minutes ago. She had just decided to ignore him for a few minutes after a particularly annoying spew of mixed messages. When he cooled off, she would talk to him again. Until then, though, he could go glub in the corner by himself.

CG: THAT SOUNDS BORING.

GC: 3R1D4N'S 4CC3NT 1S FUNNY. WHY DO YOU NOT H4V3 ON3?

CG: WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO MATESPRIT WITH HIM IF YOU LIKE IT SO MUCH?

CG: I'M SURE HE'D WELCOME IT.

Terezi giggled. Envying Eridan? That was pretty sad. And hilarious. But Terezi decided she would be nice and not press Karkat further. They both had other things to spend there time worrying about. Very time consuming things. She sighed.

GC: H3 1S 3V3N MOR3 H1GH M41NT3NENC3 TH4N YOU! TH4T WOULD B3 4NNOY1NG.

CG: I'M SORRY I HAVE SUCH ISSUES.

GC: 4T L34ST YOU SM3LL L1K3 C4NDY 4PPL3S

GC: H3 ONLY SM3LLS L1K3 GR4P3 F1ZZDR1NK.

CG: ALL YOUR REASONS SOUND REALLY FUCKING STUPID TODAY TEREZI. I FEEL MORE INSULTED THAN USUAL.

CG: AND THAT IS HARD.

She frowned. It wasn't a bad reason! It just wasn't the only one. Stupid Nubby.

GC: TH4T 1S B3C4US3 YOU 4R3 STUP1D TH3Y 4R3 GOOD R34SONS!

CG: YOU'RE JUST SO CHARMING TEREZI. I FEEL FUCKING SWEPT OFF MY FEET.

CG: GOG YOU SHOULD JUST MARRY ACCENTS AND CANDY APPLES.

GC: WHY 4R3 YOU GO1NG TO F4K3 4N 4CC3NT FOR M3?

CG: NO.

CG: THAT WOULD BE JUST PLAIN STUPID.

CG: LIKE YOU.

GC: NUBBY! : /

CG: WHAT? CAN'T TAKE AN INSULT SUDDENLY? BITTER ABOUT SOMETHING? REGRETTING NOT HOOKING UP WITH THE FUCKING FISH?

GC: ...PUP4 4R3 YOU J34LOUS?

He was. He was so obviously jealous that it was painful.

…but still hilarious.

CG: JEALOUSY IS STUPID SO NO. I WOULDN'T SAY I AM JEALOUS.

GC: OH? TH3N WHY 4R3 YOU SO 4NGRY? H3H3H3.

CG: SEE IF I TELL YOU, YOU'LL SAY IT'S STUPID. SO LET'S SKIP THAT STEP AND PREEMPTIVELY DECIDE I AM AN IDIOT.

That was no fun! The game was in the debate. Deciding to surrender took all the challenge out of it. But then…this did present her with a rather inviting opportunity.

Cackling, Terezi went down to the transportalizer and pinged from her pad to his. Silently, she snuck into his room and slid her arms around his waist. "No, Nubby, tell me!" she hissed, trying to keep from laughing. Terezi felt his whole body flinch beneath her arms and he started swearing loudly enough to hurt her ears.

"Look," he was saying, finally done his long list of slurs, "when you say shit like that with the accent and stuff, I just feel even more inadequate."

"What? Nubby, that is silly!" Terezi replied, raising her eyebrows. "It is okay. It is just funny! That is all." She paused, stepping back. "Or…do you not like my accent?" It wasn't anything absurd like Eridan's, of course, but it was still there. Stupid as Karkat was, he'd be able to hear it.

"Terezi, there isn't really anything about you I dislike. Trust me. Remember, you are perfect? And I told you, it was as stupid reason."

Terezi didn't really like blanket reassurances, but she supposed she could accept it. She sighed. "Nubby, don't worry about things like that! It was only a comment. I think Eridan is kind of stupid anyway." She shrugged. Eridan was somewhat amusing, but nowhere near as entertaining as Karkat. Grinning, Terezi leaned back and gave Karkat another squeeze.

"You shouldn't be fucking apologizing. I am just a needy wriggler." Karkat pulled away and stood up.

"Nubby, it is okay!" Terezi reached out and spent a moment groping around before she caught his arm. She slid her hands down to meet his, then gave him a sharp squeeze. "I am bad with feelings, but I know it is hard." She would have to wait to tease him again. The timing was just too wrong. Maybe after this whole stupid ordeal of who to tell and who not to tell and actually telling was over she'd be able to play her games again.

But not right now.

"You're doing fine," he grunted. "Really. It's more than I could've asked for."

She blinked as he gave her a short kiss, then shook her head and stepped back. "Nubby…" she said slowly, "I want you to be happy, though!"

"I'm happy being with you and I'm happy when you do stupid shit. I'm happy when you do idiotic things that make me love you. Okay?" Now he was close, really close, and his arms were around her. For a moment, all she could smell were candy apples and it was dizzying. "Calm the fuck down."

Terezi's head cleared and she frowned. Why did Karkat never think of the big picture? It was infuriating! He didn't seem to understand just how much work she was doing for him. Then again, she had made it a point not to make it obvious… She sighed. "I worry."

"What do you worry about? Fuck, Terezi, I do think you're perfect, alright? It's okay," he said.

Stupid, stupid dumb. He was missing the point again. General terms like "love" were strange, but she really couldn't be bothered with all the confusing squishiness he seemed to keep gravitating back to. She didn't have time to be bothered by that.

And frankly, he shouldn't, either.

Stupid Nubby. She smacked him in the side of the head, growling. "I worry about you, stupid!"

That shut him up for a few moments. "…Oh. Well." Now maybe he'd understand. "Look, Terezi, I am just an idiot." Yes. Yes he was. "But what exactly do you worry about?"

She leaned in. "I don't want you to have bad feelings." Until they figured this out, those bad feelings wouldn't go away. She knew this because she had them, too.

Feelings of foreboding.

"Terezi…that's really sweet."

"Is it worrying?" She turned her eyes to him, though the gesture was as meaningless as it was useless.

"No. I just mean…I guess, it's just nice to hear you say that. Thanks."

"But it's true!" Terezi slammed her face into his chest, feeling the glasses dig into the bridge of her olfactory sensory unit. "I want you to be happy and have good dreams so you can grow big and strong!" Maybe then he'd be safe, and she could focus on the stupid squishy problems he seemed to understand so easily.

"I'll try. I promise, Terezi. I'll grow big and strong." His grip at her sides tightened. "Fuck, I don't know how to say this, but, you're the biggest help for me."

"I will make you strong!" she promised. It was beyond care at this point—it was a necessity.

He shifted. "You already have." He started moving in to kiss her again, but this time she was ready. She slapped his cheeks between her hands with a great deal of force. He made an angry sound and she grabbed a fistful of shirt in her fist. "Not enough!" she snapped. "As long as I can win, it is not good enough!"

"Terezi, look. I know I have you," he said quietly. He was trying to cam her down. It wasn't going to work. She released the ball of fabric, but kept her claws tight and piercing on his chest. "Besides, I don't think I could beat you if I wanted to."

"You can't be like that, Nubby! It is dangerous!" Terezi insisted. Why did he think that was a comforting thing? If he couldn't beat her if he wanted to, they were in a horrible, deadly situation. He couldn't afford to be that weak.

After all, with all her mind games, she was still a blind girl. He already had the advantage! She couldn't give him any more of a handicap—he had to at least be able to win against that.

If he couldn't…they'd both be in trouble.

"Terezi, look. I'll get stronger and everything and maybe one day I'll beat you. Don't think I can't protect myself at all."

But she wasn't so sure. He was good at hiding—she'd give him that—but if it came to a fight among friends… She didn't even want to think of the plethora of ways he would screw up.

Except she had to. That was her job.

"I worry about that!" Terezi snapped. "You are silly and don't think about these things!"

"I have imagined every worst case scenario. All of them. And I thought I'd have you with me, anyway."

She clenched her fangs together, exasperated. "Of course I will be there! But you need to work hard and be strong, too."

"I'm not going to sit on my ass."

"I know," she sighed. "I am just a little scared…" Terezi knew she was overreacting a little. She couldn't expect Karkat to be like her. He wasn't the Seer of Mind, after all. He was just a normal troll with an abnormal blood colour.

And that was their entire problem.

"Hey, it's okay," Karkat was saying now. "I know it's scary. I'm scared, too. But aren't you always saying we'll get through this? We will, Terezi."

"Yes, of course we will." Terezi leaned back, taking a deep breath. "I will protect you!"

She punched him in the arm and he grunted again. She twitched her nose, surveying the scene to the best of her ability. Maybe she really was being too hard on him. All the threads of possibility that stretched out before them were driving her crazy. Terezi was sick of mapping out doomed timelines. She needed a break.

Terezi slowly reached up and rested her arms across his shoulders, kissing his cheek.

After a moment of deliberation, she shoved him to the floor. She heard a satisfying thunk as his head hit the floor and she crashed down on top of him. Terezi kissed him again and laughed as he growled in irritation. This was definitely the distraction she needed.

"I love you."

She dug her elbow into his ribs for a few seconds. "Candy apples are my favourite," she said before she leaned down and pressed her lips to his.

"I'm glad I have you, Terezi. Really."

"Yes, be glad!" Terezi snapped. "I will make everything warm and squishy." That was their goal, after all. That was the end game they were aiming for.

"I just…" Karkat was being stupid and hesitant again. Terezi plucked at his shirt, wondering if she could con another one out of him. "I really don't know how to say how much I love having you with me, Terezi. Fuck."

"Hehehe," she said, pushing herself into a sitting position. "Yes, I am wonderful!" She leaned in again, grinning her ridiculous grin. "But candy apples are also delicious."

Karkat slapped her cheek and she sat back again, cackling.

"Hey, Nubby?" she said, twitching her nose at him. It was time to be a little serious again. She was sick to death of seriousness, but it was necessary. She had to make sure everything was planned out and planned right.

"Yeah?"

"You said you imagined the worst case situations, correct?"

He took a while to respond. "Yeah. How could I not with all the fucking nightmares?"

She flopped down on him and crawled up like a lizard ("dragon", she corrected) and leaned in to kiss the candy apples on his face. She bonked her olfactory sensory unit awkwardly against his forehead, but managed to pass it off as a slip. He smacked her in the side of her head and she gave a sharp laugh.

"This is why you are stupid," she said, sitting up again.

"How exactly is that a reason for stupidity?" he growled.

"Because you have to think of every possibility, idiot," she said, trailing her fingers across the hem of his sleeve. "Not just the really bad ones. If you don't, you'll make stupid, stupid dumb mistakes and we'll all get killed.

"I've thought of good shit, too, Terezi," he mumbled. "I just don't have to be worried about those."

She frowned slightly, tapping her claws against her chest. This was what she meant. He was so bad at seeing in anything other than black and white!

But then, she thought with a grin, she couldn't see at all.

It was time to try and make him understand it the way she understood it. "What about the things in between? Can you not imagine a neutral situation?"

"What the fuck do you even mean?"

She suppressed an exasperated sigh. This was going to be difficult. "Maybe 'neutral' was the wrong word. Think of it as a balanced scale. Bad people are on one side, we are on the other. If the scale tips towards them, those are the worst case scenarios. If it tips towards us, those are the best case scenarios." She stopped fidgeting. "But those aren't the only options. What if the scale balances? You could get stuck with some very difficult choices. That's why you have to consider every possibility, not just the good and the bad as though they are separate. Then, from each outcome you think of, you have to think of the possibilities that will come of that. Considering only a few of the options is too limiting, Nubby."

Terezi had to admit, the balanced scale was probably a bad comparison. Reality wasn't perfect. The scale was probably not balanced. There were more than those three options. It could tilt a little to one side, a little to the other, each degree representing dozens of possible scenarios with varying levels of awful.

Karkat didn't need to know that, though. It wasn't like he could calculate reactions and possibilities to the extent she could. That's why this was her job.

"I don't really know how you expect me to think of that all the fucking time," he snapped, rubbing at his chest where she had clawed him. "Shit, how do you even have time to consider all those damn things?"

She pursed her lips, eyes narrowed. "It is all I do."

"I'm just a shit. Thanks, Terezi."

"Yes. Thank me," she replied icily. Sighing, she shook her head. "You are welcome," she said at length, making a conscious effort to sound a little kinder.

"I just don't understand, Terezi. It's not that I'm not grateful to have you helping or anything."

She twitched her nose. He smelled sincere. Well, obviously. Karkat was a grumpy sourpuss, but he wasn't a total asshole. She reached out and gave his arm a squeeze. "I know. I don't expect you to understand. It is my job, so I will do it."

"I'm doing my best. Just, fuck. There's so much to do and I don't know what the hell I am doing half the time."

"Just focus on getting stronger," she replied, leaning forward and briefly pressing her lips to his. "I'll take care of the rest."

After all, that's what she was there for.