A/N: Wow, finally, an average sized chapter. Another one tomorrow and then you definately won't get anything until monday night, if I work hard. If not, tuedays. And yes, I am planning to continue through the break, it should be finished pretty soon. About...hmm...four chapters left? Maybe five. I'm not sure.

Thankee to all reviewers, I nearly forgot to post today, you can thank eyliena that I actually remembered...:P Honestly, I think I'm losing my mind O.O

And yes. I am mean. Oh so mean.

Here's some weird psychic stuff. :P

Chapter 23 – There Is No Chapter 23

The Doctor's head was pounding even worse than his hangover a few days previously. As he slowly gathered his senses, he tried to lift his head and open his eyes, but nothing reacted to his strains. He had a feeling if he just let himself relax for a moment he'd pass out again easily.

"She's 'aving a hard time," came Jackie's smooth voice from a distance, and the Doctor just listened. "It was false labour. The thing the TARDIS gave us to help her is definitely workin' though. Anythin' 'appening here?"

"Still out. Getting slightly better though," Mickey's voice replied.

"I wish these babies would 'urry up and goddamn come," Jackie muttered, closer to him now. "It's killin' the Doctor and drivin' Rose sick with worry for 'im."

"Rose…?" the Doctor asked suddenly, opening his eyes to meet the blurry figures of Jackie and Mickey leaning over him. "Where's Rose?"

"Rose is fine sweetheart, you just rest." Jackie smiled at him reassuringly, but he shook his head, getting on his elbows and peering around the Infirmary.

"Please, I've gotta see Rose…"

"I've told ya Doctor, she's doin' fine. But she won't be if you don't rest," she insisted, brushing some hair out of his face caringly.

"But where-" He suddenly interrupted himself with a yell of more pain as Rose had another contraction, falling back down onto the bed and scrunching up his eyes tight, his body thrashing around under it's own influence.

"Shush…" Jackie hushed him as the pain wore away, putting a hand on his forehead. "It's okay…stay still…" He actually thought for a moment that Jackie had been abducted by aliens and had been replaced by some kind of freaky alien mother-like thing. Although, it was more likely that she was caring for him to make sure he was still alive at the birth. Or maybe she was just being nice?

He was too gullible. The needle pierced the vein in his arm with a minute amount of pain, and before he even had time to react the liquid had filtered into his blood stream, instantly making him become unfocused even quicker than his time at the hospital. His head swam, his eyes felt heavy and he automatically closed them, and even before he could realise what a stupid idiot he was for doing that, he slipped into the blackness.

Bloody sedatives.

He forced his eyes open, forced himself to sit up and in an instant had promptly collapsed again, closing his eyes.

'The guy who invented sedatives deserves to die.' he determined bitterly, managing to open heavy eyes to assess his situation again. He was in the TARDIS Infirmary drugged to the eyeballs, with no sonic screwdriver, no hope and no one around to help, susceptible to pains in his head which had the ability to render him unconscious, burns that needed urgent medical attention and a supposed 'mother-in-law' who had recently taken to stabbing him with large needles.

Well, he'd give it 10/10 purely because it was different.

He pulled himself up and slid to the bottom of the bed, trying to get his head together.

"Good mornin'," said a voice from the doorway, and he swung his head around to look at the source. One blurred Jackie Tyler holding a large needle in her right hand. There was no mistaking the message.

"Dun't come near me widdat Jackie," he slurred, stumbling onto unsteady feet and wavering as he stood upright.

"Doctor, I'm doin' this for you. It'll just be till after the babies are born, then Rose will stop havin' contractions and you'll stop getting' headaches."

"Is consi'erate Jackie, but…"

She started to walk towards him, squirting the excess fluid out of the needle like one of those mad experimental scientists you see in horror movies. He backed away quickly, smashing accidentally into the worktop, making him fall back onto the wood in sitting position. Several things went smashing to the floor as he struggled as far back as he could against the wall, curling up into a ball as if to shield himself.

"Mum, what the bloody hell are you doin'?" Rose's voice said from across the room, and the Doctor quickly lifted his head, trying to make his vision sharper to check over Rose. "Get away from him!"

Rose rushed over to the Doctor as Jackie obediently backed away, grabbing his arm and pulling him out of his defensive cocoon. He swung his legs over the side of the worktop, now in sitting position; not hesitating to grip her in a gentle hug as his senses slowly started reasserting to normal.

"Well?" Rose demanded as the Doctor and her parted, swinging around to face her mother with an expression of utter contempt. The Doctor was only glad he wasn't on the receiving end of it. "Why are you tryin' to stab him with a needle? He was bloody terrified!"

The Doctor felt insulted. Just a little bit. Him? Terrified? Whatever.

"It's the only way to keep 'im alive Rose…"

"The Doctor can sort it! Can't you Doctor?"

The Doctor paused, glancing between the two women staring fixedly at him. "Should be able to."

"Well do it!" Jackie said as if it was obvious, and he shrugged, turning Rose by her shoulders carefully back to face him.

"You might feel a side effect, just bear with me," he warned, placing two hands on either side of her womb. He opened his mind, at first accessing surface memories and thoughts, before delving deeper into the mystical depths of his mind. Even further, down and down and down, until he could see a small light in the far distance. He could feel himself walking towards the light, no, running…he was running towards it, reaching out a formless arm…

Then he wasn't in his mind anymore.

He suddenly felt innocence, innocence that only a child could have inside their minds. He wanted to share the innocence – it was so warm and inviting, but knew even if he tried to share it, it wouldn't be able to get inside him through his hard skinned body.

"Hello?" his voice echoed in the seemingly infinite plain. It wasn't dark, yet it wasn't light. It was just right. The infinite plain of innocent energy went on forever, with no obstacles in place. But then again, he could have one three feet away from him and not even see it.

"Don't mind me, just looking around," he continued, walking a bit deeper into the plain.

"Daddy?"

He froze in mid-step, swinging around to face the feeling of the voice, walking again.

"Yes, it's me," he called back, extending a hand infront of him to try and clear the blurriness and shapeless reality. "D'you mind redecorating in here sometime? It's kinda hard to navigate. Who did I land in by the way?"

"Girl," it replied shortly, it's vocabulary only picked up from the conversations it had heard outside the womb.

The Doctor paused for a moment, thoughts flashing through his mind rapidly.

"I know. I'll call you Eva."

"No you bloody well won't!" came a distant voice, and the Doctor felt a shudder of panic through the landscape.

"Don't worry, it's just your mother. Which reminds me…"

He reached up a hand to a mass of nothingness, concentrating entirely on his target. He gripped it mentally in hands, giving it hard squeeze.

Immediately the plain started shaking uncontrollably, and could hear Rose's yells of frustration as he crippled over, with the pain in his head. He let go and the pain suddenly diminished, allow him to straighten up again as the shaking and screaming stopped.

"You did that didn't you?!" a voice screamed, followed by a large 'cracking' sound, and even before the pain hit him the Doctor knew he'd just been slapped.

"OW!!!" he bellowed, holding a hand to his painful cheek as he doubled over again in even more agony.

"Get on with it!"

"Yeah, sorry…" the Doctor said, voice dripping with sarcasm. "Pardon me if the process of accessing the minds of two undeveloped babies inside another person and dragging neuron energy from the depths of a woman's womb to the amniotic sack to the baby into it's head to my head and to my body is a bit of a drag, it'll be done soon."

He didn't wait for a reply as he took in a deep breath, reaching up for his target again. This time he was extra careful when he handled it, not wanting to get another slap. His cheek was still throbbing from the last one. Genetics Schmetics. He sincerely hoped their daughter wouldn't be able to force that much of a slap, or he'd be permanently sucking up to her.

He concentrated hard, pulling out all the excess energy that was infact his, stuck in it from his sperm. He wouldn't stop feeling the pain, but now it would be easier to handle.

Once he'd finished, he felt a lot more alert and aware of his surroundings. He looked up to the heavens, as if Rose would actually be able to hear him better.

"Okay, I'm coming back out. Hold on tight."

He closed his eyes, willing himself to fly back up and out. He felt his feet lift off the floor, as then he was flying. He flew slowly back through the girl's mind until he reached the barrier of light, and then broke through it in a blur of speed. He soared back through the depths of his own and to the surface, willing himself on as he broke the conscious surface.

A/N: Chapter 25 – Annihilate The Labour Government!

"What?" she asked, and his eyes went from her face to her womb in a blink, his expression turning to surprise. Slowly he raised a hand to point at her womb.

"Your waters just broke," he said simply.

Rose gaped, looking down at her stomach, to see her maternity dress damp at her navel.

"Oh cripes."