((A/N: thanks for all the reviews! i realized suddenly i totally left out anything envolving exspheres, so i've lipglossed the story... hee hee hee, and i aslo realised alot of this is out of order. oh and i added to the story name. i had a hard time with Forwhatshisfaces name. so i made on up that sounded ok. hope you enjoy!
i don't own TOS or Moon Boots.))
First Linda went and talked to Krystal.
"So, umm. Who's like grave is this?"
Linda looked down sadly, "It's my dad's. He's dead."
"Well I kind of gathered that from the fact he has a grave," She squinted at the name then looked a Linda shocked, "Andy? Your fathers name was Andy?"
"That's what's on the headstone."
"So is your mother alive by any chance?"
"Not that I know." Linda cursed, "She's a whore, leaving my dad dying and stuff. Doesn't matter anyway, Drinny's my mom now."
"Drinny? What the hell kind of name is Drinny? If this was a story it would sound like the author couldn't find a girl version of the name Dirk so she just made some random shit up!" Krystal said, growling, "Oh and sorry bout the whole motherless thing. See I'm your…"
She was suddenly cut off by Gina, "Linda stop wasting all your time with the purple chick! You still have to talk to me!"
"Okey dokey!" Linda said, hopping away from Krystal.
Krystal looked after her in dull shock, "Mom…"
Of course Linda didn't hear this, she was to busy going into a full depth conversation about pantyhose with Gina.
Finally, after being lectured about the proper way to eat soup by Ron, Linda and Cole went up on to the balcony. Maybe to talk, maybe to make out, or maybe to throw around large balloons full of peanut butter cookies. Linda wasn't sure yet.
"Listen Linda, I'm not big on sentimental stuff but… I'm glad I've had you as a friend, and you're really nice and all. And tomorrow I'm going on this big adventure which results in me dying."
"Huh?" she replied, being to busy applying lip gloss to pay any attention.
"Never mind, I can't believe I have two moms…"
"Neither can I. But I guess this is the part where I say that you're just luckier than most people."
"Ok." Cole leaned back on the railing, "So where's that present you promised?"
"I umm…. I…."
There was a loud snapping sound as the railing gave way to Cole's weight, causing him to fall promptly off the roof.
"Ouch, man that hurt." He said, sitting up to scratch his head.
Ron sighed, "Whatever. Can we leave now?"
Linda shouted down to the group, "I'll bring your present tomorrow! What time should I come over?"
Cole thought for a second, "Noon!"
Krystal slapped him, "You dimwit, we're leaving at, wait. No never mind."
They all waved and walked back to town.
The next day.
"Umm, mom?" Linda said to Drinny's dwarven figure, which was facing her father's grave, "I'm going to tag along on the salvation regeneration thing Cole's going on. Can I have some cash for hotels along the way?"
Drinny sighed, "I'm sorry for yelling at you about the lip-gloss. Here." She handed her adopted daughter a tube of shiny lip-gloss. "This was your father's. He said to give it to you when you were old enough."
"Wow," She held it up to the light, "It's so beautiful. Why did my dad have lip-gloss? Was he gay?"
"That isn't just normal lip-gloss Linda, it's special. Your father died protecting it."
"What?"
"He was murdered by the Desians because they wanted it. And now, you can have it so they'll hunt you instead."
Tears formed in Linda's eyes as she hugged her mother, "Thanks mom. I'll get those damn Desians for killing my father and hurting Pebble."
"Who's Pebble?"
"Never mind, I've got to go." Linda broke away and started down the walkway, "I'll send you a postcard!"
"Linda!" The white haired girl ran down the path, "What are you doing here? What about Cole?"
"Oh! Gina! Wicked timing, I've got this wicked new lip-gloss and I'm planning on joining them!"
"What are you stupid?" Gina shouted, "Don't answer that I already know. Cole and them left hours ago. You were totally lame and didn't show!"
"What? But… He blew me off. What a evil son of a-"
Linda continued to grumble the whole way to Iseala.
"How could he lie to me? I thought we had a connection. And he totally ditches me to save the world! What kind of stupid guy chooses the salvation of the world over his best friend? A stupid one, that's what I think! That Krystal girl probably put him up to it. Her and her stupid French manicure, auburn hair, well rounded cleavage and nicely tanned arms. I mean how am I supposed to compare to that?"
Gina answered with a shrug as they entered the village gates.
"Hey, Linda?" the guard said, staring at her freshly glossed lips.
"It was not my dog! She does not pee in flower gardens I swear!"
The guard laughed, "Not that. Phil and Frannie wanted you to go see them."
The pair skipped to Cole's residence, entering to have Phil throw a letter at Linda's crouch.
"Ok dude! Why the hell do you always throw this at that area of my body?"
Phil shrugged, "Just read the damn letter so I don't ever have to talk to you again."
"Dear Linda," Linda read aloud.
"Hey, I'm sorry for leaving on you. Didn't really mean to, but Krystal told me the wrong time by accident. I knew it! I'm not very good at this whole writing thing but I'd just like to tell you, I liked being friends with you. It was fun. Especially the day you let me see your…" Linda skipped a few lines, blushing a deep red, "And I wish I could do it again. But I can't. I really wish I could, your…ummm, I'll skip that. In short, nice knowing you, have a nice life. Signed Cole."
She ripped up the letter into tiny shreds and ate it.
Gina turned to Phil, "It sounds like he's not coming back."
"Well duh, being a Chosen pretty much guarantees that he'll d-"
A loud boom cut off Cole's mother and Linda and Gina ran outside. Desians were everywhere. Threatening school children, stealing lunch money, setting houses on fire, and tipping cows.
"Damn those Desian scum!" Linda said as they made their way toward the action, instead of doing the smart thing and running far away, "I'll get them all!"
Gina rolled her eyes, "Sure you will."
They arrived in the town square, where a creepy blue haired lady with a fake arm met them.
"Will the real Linda Irving please stand up?"
Linda moved her way into the front of the crowd, "I'm Linda Irving, yes the real Linda Irving!"
The lady smiled, "I'm Lady Fordienian. One of the five grand something or other. You have moon boots. I want them!"
Linda looked the lady up and down, "Listen lady, I don't have any damn moon boots, and even if I did I won't give them to you."
"You do so! I saw you at the Ranch."
The mayor looked at Linda, "You went to the ranch? Are you stupid?"
Gina rolled her eyes again, "Do you really need to ask that?"
"Listen I don't have moon boots! I only have my lip-gloss!" Linda pulled out the lip-gloss her mother had given her. "And you can't have it! Plus you already attacked here yesterday at the temple!"
A random side character Desian chick laughed, "We didn't attack here, it must have been them! And by them I mean a third party. One you really shouldn't go joining. Even though they're actually the semi good guys."
Fordienian was more interested in Linda's lip-gloss, "Give me that! It's the product of the Angelic Project!"
"No! And what's the Angelic project?"
"Never mind. Here fight this random monster I'm having brought in!"
Suddenly a huge ugly as sin monster appeared, lunging at Gina and Linda.
((i can't write anymore right now, so it's a chiffhanger of sorts. i'll update soon. review! and reading presents! -hand's out toy rhieards- ))