A/N:... I have no idea where the ending came from. Wahahaha. Oh my gosh. I don't know. xD

+ From Egg to Sword – chap.o4 +

Link was curious.

About the pouch, that is.

What exactly was in it? Why was the old lady acting like a stick was up her butt over it? Was it some kind of miracle potion or something? Or maybe it was some peanuts. Link was kind of getting hungry.

But it couldn't be peanuts, because when he had started poking the pouch, it felt grainy, as if sand was in it. By this time, the two were back in the Lost Woods, walking the route back to where they saw the disgusting guy.

Navi eyed her partner as he continued poking. "Be careful with that," she warned. "You don't know what it does."

"Jeez, lighten up! You should stop worrying about me and worry more about yourself," he advised, opening the small bag.

"Link! What are you doing!? Didn't you hear what I said?!" Navi yelled in panic.

Link poked a finger in the pouch. "Calm down Nav! Nothing's gonna happe—" he suddenly yelped, screaming and thrashing around insanely, falling to the floor. "AAAHHHHH! AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! SOMETHING'S IN HERE! NAVIIIIIIII!"

Navi screamed in fright, hovering over him, with absolutely no idea what to do. Hey, what could she do other than provide information and squeak and bonk things... but her bonking abilities would prove useless at the moment. "OH MY GODDESSES! WHAT DO I DO?! DIN HELP US! I'M HELPLESS! SOMEBODY HELP!"

All of a sudden Link stopped thrashing and his screaming turned into violent fits of laughter. He withdrew his finger from the pouch and laughed insanely, pointing at Navi.

She stared at him deadpan. "..."

x – x – x

The fairy chuckled as they came out of the hole in the ground, sighing in satisfaction. Link followed her as they walked along, clothes ripped, bruises and scratches adorning his already dirty self.

"... You didn't have to shove that Wolfos at me..."

"Hey, you deserved it." she grinned as they continued to walk along. Eventually they came upon the clearing where that disgusting guy was before, but noticed that sitting in his place was a little pig-tailed blond girl.

"Who are you?" Link asked (bluntly) as they approached her.

She looked up at him. Obviously she was a Kokiri. "My name is Fado."

"Oh, hi Fado! Hey, do you happen to know where that disgusting guy went?"

"Away."

"Away?"

"Yeah."

"Where?"

"Who knows? He probably turned into a stalfos. Dontcha know? If somebody stays in the Lost Woods too long they turn into stalfos. Everyone, stalfos."

Link gasped, turning to his fairy. "Oh my Goddesses! Navi! Did you hear that!? If we're here too long we're going to turn into stalfos!"

Of course Navi ignored him, turning to Fado. "Um, do you know where he went? Cuz we got this potion thing from his mom over at Kakariko Village..."

She raised an eyebrow. "Potion?"

Link was still hyperventilating. He started waving his arms insanely. "Naviiiii! I don't want to turn into a stalfos! Didn't you hear the story of that stalfos that nobody liked so they hung him upside down and tickled his toes 'til he couldn't take it no' mo'?!"

"No."

The hero blinked, tilting his head in confusion. "Really? That's weird. It's a popular story in Kokiri Forest, you should know at least some of it—"

"HELLO, HELLO, DON'T IGNORE ME!" Fado shrieked, attracting Link and Navi's attention. "Yes. What was that about a potion?"

"Oh!" Link reached into his pocket, taking out the pouch the old hag gave him. "This—"

All of a sudden she gasped, snatching the pouch away from him. "This... THIS! This, this! It's this!"

"What's this?"

"What's what?"

"That."

"What's that?"

"What's what?"

"What you said."

"What'd I say?"

"About this."

"This?"

"Yeah, this."

Navi bonked them both. "SHADDAP!"

Link's eye twitched at her. "Stop hurting me!"

"Well it's kind of hard to resist when you're being a complete idiot—"

"This is made of forest shrooms!" Fado gasped, poking the pouch a bit. "How in the world did it get out? This belongs in the forest! You simply must let me have it."

Link bit his lip. But he had a duty to give it to the disgusting guy... he couldn't just go back on his word! He wasn't that type of person! No, no, not at all. "I'm sorry, but I can't," he explained. "That guy's mom wants me to give it to him."

"What if I give it to him for you?"

"But you said you didn't know where he went."

Fado laughed nervously. "Tch, when did I say that?"

"A few seconds ago."

"Just let me have it! That guy probably won't show up again anytime soon."

"... But..."

In a split second, Fado yanked a (rather large) knife out of a sheathe on her hip. Link's eyes widened, backing up slowly when the Kokiri girl began to advance. "Look, guy. I don't care who you are, where you come from, but THESE SHROOMS ARE MINE!" She thrust forward with the knife.

"Watch out!" Navi screamed. Link jumped sideways, narrowly dodging a stab in the stomach as he landed on his bottom.

The blue fairy began flittering around wildly. "Oh my gosh, fight, Link!"

Link stared at her in horror. "Are you crazy? I can't!"

"How am I crazy?! She's the one who tried STABBING you!"

"But she's only a little girl!"

Navi paused. "... You're right, it's probably not worth all this for that potion, but..."

Link's eye twitched again. "YOU'RE MISSING THE POINT!"

The hysterical Fado cackled, running up to him, the hero scooting back on the grass frantically until his back collided with the forest wall. The girl snatched the pouch away from him and dangled it in front of his face. "Ahaha! Just who do you think makes the stalfos around here? All those impudent fools back then, going somewhere they weren't allowed at... I've stayed up nights on end protecting these woods! These shrooms are the only thing that keeps me going! Just try getting them back, I dare you!"

Navi stared, unbelieving. "It can't be... so she..."

Link's eyes widened. He pointed at Fado. "You didn't... all those people... did you...?"

"You mean tickle their toes 'til they can't take it no' mo'?!" Fado giggled. "Of course I did! It was pleasurable! But it got boring so that's why I turned to the shrooms."

The fairy raised an eyebrow. "Wha? Then how did the stalfos pop up?"

Fado tilted her head. "Oh yes. After I tickle their toes, we have a nice little feast before I kick 'em out of the woods. The bones are the remains of the animal we hunted."

Link and Navi blinked. The blond looked at his fairy. "I don't get it."

She shrugged. "Yeah me either."

"Hey..."

The two shut up at the fourth voice. They, along with Fado, turned at the source to see the disgusting guy standing at one of the entryways to the woods. "Eh? Who are you guys?" He spotted Link. "Heeeeey! It's you, Mr. Nice Guy! Didja give the hag the mushroom?"

Fado twitched when she saw him. "I THOUGHT I KICKED YOU OUT ALREADY! WHY ARE YOU BACK!?"

He didn't reply, but instead went over to the stump he used to sit on. Bending over, he shuffled around the grass there for a bit before picking up a rectangle, metal thingamabob. Then he paused, just staring down at it.

Meanwhile Link had gotten up and wandered over to the disgusting guy. He looked over his shoulder. "What's that?"

"A tool, Mr. Nice Guy. You know, it's called a saw? It's sharp and carpenters use it to cut things and—"

Link waved his hands. "Okay okay, I know what it is!"

The disgusting guy sighed. "Why did I come back for this again? I don't even like it. It's disgusting and it reminds me of my disgusting family and—"

Link poked him, grinning sheepishly. "Can I have it then?" The guy shrugged and handed it to him. "Woohoo! Thanks!"

"No prob."

The two screamed when they saw a knife coming their direction. They ducked and it stuck to the wall behind them.

Fado started waving her arms, tears pouring out of her eyes. "Why does everybody ignore me?!" she sobbed. Navi coughed and muttered something incoherent. Fado pointed to the disgusting guy. "And you! You didn't answer my question! Why did you come back?"

"Because I missed you."

"... Wha?"

Link gasped, covering his mouth, then giggling out, "Ooh, revelation!" Navi stared at him.

Fado gasped too, covering her own mouth. "OH MY GOSH! I MISSED YOU TOO!" she threw another knife out of pure joy. It headed towards Link and missed him by a centimeter or two. He screamed when he noticed it beside him.

Navi would have fallen over if she wasn't in mid-air. "Gah, talk about delayed reaction..." she poked him. "Link, get out of here before that Fado girl throws another one! Hurry, run!"

Nodding, Link looked to the two. "Hey guys, thanks for everything and have fun without me! Bye!" Without another thought, he darted out of the Lost Woods, Navi right behind him.

Yet, Fado and the disgusting guy were too absorbed in their new-found love for each other to notice his escape.

+ tBc . . . +

- naGami c.