Ashes doesn't own Yu-Gi-Oh!

Chapter Twelve

Jounouchi woke up twice the next morning. At seven, he wished for the first time in ages that he had alcohol to blame. He'd left Kaiba's hotel room quietly -- why the hell had crashing on the floor seemed like such a good at one AM? -- and drove like a bat out of hell to get home. He called in sick to work and went back to sleep.

He woke up the second time in a sudden rush; he cocooned in his blankets and pulled his pillow over his head as though it would keep the reality out. All he could do was groan. How could he had forgotten how every fight had ended? Damn it, he'd vowed to be done with Kaiba two years ago -- burnt the memories, removed himself from the situation.

"So why," he asked aloud, muffled by his pillow, "did you go and end up on your back again? He's bastard, but he's right: you're an idiot."

Eventually he made it out of the bed to make lunch -- when it came between his stomach and his shame, his stomach almost always won. After having something to eat, he decided to go for a walk to clear his head, or at least get it in reasonable order. As he found himself facing daylight with people milling around him on the sidewalk, he felt a sudden pang of clarity.

Love. He'd always assumed that relationships were about love -- even when it came to destroying his life for his father. Well, fuck love. With Kaiba it was always about one-upping him. It was about how it felt to be in constant struggle, to make Kaiba acknowledge he was the better man. They had both defined themselves by competition most of their lives, and when everyone else had moved on, Kaiba and Jounouchi had been left with each other for validation.

Kaiba had to feel it too; if Kaiba didn't feel that, he wouldn't have bothered with sex. He wouldn't have even let Jounouchi into the room. The challenge was that they were trying to prove that they'd never be the same; Jounouchi fought to prove that he could be the best, and Kaiba pushed back to prove that he'd never fall to Jounouchi's level.

The whole thing nearly toppled Jounouchi, and he made a break for his car. He knew exactly what he had to say to Kaiba, and just how to elaborate on, "It isn't like that." He fumbled around his pockets, swearing when he realized that he'd left his keys upstairs. He took the stairs two at a time and nearly fell on his face going through the door. Just as he snatched the keys off the table, he heard, "Jounouchi! I've been looking all over for you."

Jounouchi stopped mid-stride, and didn't turn around right away. How was it that he'd forgotten about Mokuba?

"My damn cab driver was new or something, because he couldn't find my apartment. I gave him yours, and it took him fucking twice as long as it should have to get here."

"You called another cab?" Jounouchi didn't mean to say it, but he couldn't help it -- it was easier than, "I slept with your brother again," and he had been awfully proud to have been someone's favorite. Then the word 'apartment' sunk in, and Jounouchi added, "When did you get an apartment?"

"We signed the lease months ago, but I just got settled yesterday. It's pretty cool, and there's a couple of girls down the hall that are really nice. And if you were answering your phone I would've called you." Mokuba produced the scratched red cell from his jacket pocket, holding it out to Jounouchi with an expression of pure frustration. It took Jounouchi a moment to remember that it'd been in his jeans pocket the night before. And if Mokuba had it, that meant... "You ended up in bed, didn't you?"

"No! Well, maybe a little."

"You don't end up just a little in bed, Jounouchi! I didn't confide in you so you could go throw it back in Niisama's face, and don't tell me you didn't -- I know you. I just wanted..." Mokuba clenched his eyes shut as though he was trying to refrain from hitting something -- or someone. "I didn't want to think you were holed up here blaming Niisama for everything, when it wasn't all his fault. You weren't supposed to go and do this."

"It's not like I tried to kill him."

"The state of his hotel room suggested otherwise; I saw the damages bill this morning when he checked out. I like you, Jounouchi, I really do, but this isn't what I want for Niisama." Mokuba stepped forward, handed Jounouchi the phone. "Can you take me home now? I just wanted to drop that off."

Numbly, Jounouchi nodded. There went that plan. "Yeah."

The ride was quiet -- Mokuba wasn't talkative for the first time that Jounouchi could remember; for that matter, he didn't feel all that loquacious himself. The teen left the cab with a muttered, "See ya," and Jounouchi went straight back to his apartment.

Right back to where he started: confused and unsure and wrestling for a definition for his current state of affairs. Unopened letters from his friends greeted him, bold and white against his coffee table. Jounouchi plopped onto the couch and collected them, dropping them again on his lap and opening Anzu's first.

One after another he sucked in the notes, the messy handwriting and grease-stained paper -- "Thank you, Honda," he laughed while he read about how much his friend was enjoying his pizza. Yuugi's was the last he read... and he hesitated before opening it. The things Yuugi might say were the most daunting. During his last year in Domino Jounouchi had become increasingly distant; he hadn't even bothered saying goodbye. With a lungful of air he tore the seal of the envelope and unfolded the paper.

It was surprisingly docile. Yuugi talked about his days in Domino -- a cute girl he was seeing (though he still wished that Anzu might come around), his job at the Game Shop, Grandpa's retirement party...

"Mom and Grandpa would love to see you there," Yuugi wrote. "Dad's even coming in early from his business trip for it. It's going to be the sixth of next month -- a Monday. Grandpa couldn't bear doing it while the shop was closed. He wants customers to come and see him go."

The phone rang, and Jounouchi set the letter aside to answer it. "Yeah?"

"Come to work," the dispatcher growled. "I don't care if you're puking blood, we're getting slammed out there."

Jounouchi sighed. The distraction would be welcome -- the sudden chaos his world had become was too much to swallow in one sitting. "Fine. Give me ten minutes."

"You've got five."

Jounouchi was out of the house in three.

--

It was near seven at night; after seven solid hours of drunk foreigners and angry natives, Jounouchi was ready to call it a night. He was tired. He was cranky. Tokyo wasn't the fun and unfamiliar place he thought it was two years ago.

Out of the corner of his vision he saw a girl waving her money at him from the curb. "One more," Jounouchi said with gritted teeth. "One more." He pulled up to her on the curb; the first thing in the cab was a medium-sized suitcase, then a backpack, and then his fare. She was young and petite, eyeliner smeared on her cheeks. "Where to?" Jounouchi asked as the door shut and the dome light dimmed.

"Anywhere," she said stiffly, sniffling. "I don't care where. I hate this city."

"Ah." First Jounouchi drove forward, reading the road signs casually. After a moment he realized he was instinctively heading south, heading out of town. "Hey," he said slowly, "if you want to go to Domino City, I'll pay half the fare." If he broke his bank account doing so... Well, it wasn't the kind of decision to be made rationally.

"Domino..." She rolled the word across her tongue, then asked, "I've heard of it; what's it like?"

"It's great," Jounouchi reminisced. "You never get bored, because it's big enough without being too big. It's on a port, it's warm, it's diverse. I once met a hot Egyptian chick there. Japan's home of games people would call it."

"Oh! Battle City!" She nodded, and it made Jounouchi smile to hear someone say it. It was one thing when it was a casual story between friends, but hearing it from a stranger made it more real. "God, that was forever ago. I remember that... Ah, the guy who set it up, I remember he was hot. Whatever happened to him? And the winner -- he was some kid, right?"

"How old are you?" Jounouchi asked, indignance crawling up his spine. He didn't play the duels card, though; he knew it was pretty useless after she'd made it pretty clear that Tokyo had forgotten the big deals of his past.

She didn't even remember Kaiba's name.

"Never mind," he said after she didn't answer. "It doesn't matter. Domino, then?"

"Yeah," she said slowly. "I could go for that kinda of change in atmosphere."

Jounouchi made sure he was almost out of Tokyo before he reported the fare -- then he turned his radio off to avoid the fallout. It was going to be a long drive, so he might as well be friendly. "What's got you so eager to leave Tokyo?" he asked, looking at her through his rear view mirror. The girl had settled to watching the scenery pass by.

"I came here for my boyfriend... well, sort of. See, I'm from up north. My parents own a toy store in this little town -- Misawa, you heard of it?" Jounouchi shook his head, and she snorted. "No one has; it's full of American kids who get their kicks stealing stuff. Anyone, one day I meet the guy, a little older than me but absolutely dashing, and we hook up -- and he splits the next week. My dad pitches a fit when he finds out and throws me out. I worked at restaurant and lived with friends until I had the money to get a train ticket here to find him. You know what I find out?" She sniffled again, a little louder; Jounouchi dug an unopened pack of pocket tissue from his glove box and threw it back to her. After blowing her nose she continued, "He has a baby. A baby, and he was up north sleeping with a seventeen-year-old girl."

Jounouchi made a good point of not steering off the road. If she was underage... "You're seventeen?"

"Not anymore; I was eighteen by the time I moved here, and it'll be my birthday soon. The shit I had to go through to stay alive in this place, the shitty dives I worked at just to get by..." She shifted and blew her nose again. "And you?"

"I, uh, actually ran away to Tokyo two years ago. I ran away from my dad, from my... Well, from a guy." Jounouchi waited for a reaction, and got none. Ah, well, friendly it was then. "Met him again, and... It's a sticky situation."

"I was a hooker," she burst, like she'd just been waiting for the right time and given up. "A classy one, in a nice hotel, but a whore. So you're gay -- try coping with being cheap."

Jounouchi sighed. "I already have."

-end-

notes
I'm really at a complete loss as for what to say at this point -- the this chapter and the next chapter are such a connected unit for me that I can't really view the action seperately. I, by no means, regret that they're two seperate chapters, but still. We're at a point in the story that either it's going to work, or it won't -- unlike the beginning, I can't still change things to make sense, lol. At least I'm no longer nervous!

Misawa shout out! I know that (at least at some point a year or two ago) there was someone on the list who was born there, so I thought I'd say hi. D I couldn't come up with a northern town when creating this bit character, and figured I may as well go with what I know.

Many thanks to purkle, who has been a real goddess in this whole beta process; she's a doll! D And now, off to my hot pocket I go! On a side note for readers who don't use reader alerts, I set up a news list on my website so that you can get updates on the site and on stories directly to your e-mail. If you're at all interested in that, check it out at http://hiatus.