Author Note: Hey Doodlebugs! This was going to be a Christmas Special, but then Christmas came and went, I waved as it passed by, and then remembered that I hadn't finished writing the chapter. So its an After Christmas Special...ok? Cool.
So this is what they got up to AFTER Christmas...and look out for a special guest appearance, and a scene similar to a very funny video I found the other day on YouTube. So enjoy!
oOo
"Jingle Bells! The Sherrif smells! Robin layed an egg!" Ads slurred as he staggered through the woods a little later on, his hands clasping two golden goblets of wine.
"Ads? Are you alright?" Rose asked as he stumbled past her.
"Yup...just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fan, fan, fan, fan, fun, fun, fun, fun, FUN!"
"O...k..." Rose replied slowly, raising her eyebrows at him. "Me thinks your not."
"Well can I tell you a secret?" Ads asked, coming closer and whispering in her ear, "I'm a little drunk. Can you tell?"
"Oh no, not at all," came the sarcastic reply and Ads grinned stupidly.
"See, now thats why I love you Rose Tyler...your funny! Your a funny yellow girl with a funny flower name."
"Oi! Is that an insult?"
"I love you Rose Tyler...L-U-R-V-E - lurve!"
"You mean L-O-V-E?"
"Thats what I said...O-L-I-V-E...buh-bye now..." and he staggered off again, leaving Rose confused.
"Olive? What? Oh never mind."
oOo
Meanwhile, Padme's Sister was calling up a tree to Robin, who was taking down all the christmas lights and decorations. They hadn't been able to find a Christmas Tree, so Robin had suggested decorating one of the ordinary trees instead. This was all going fine until it came to taking the decorations down again and he accidentally dropped a bauball. It bounced off Ads' head.
"Ow!" he looked up and saw Robin hanging from a branch above him.
"Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho! Its you! Oh, I love you! You know why? Because you're so thick! You're Mister Thick Thick Thickety Thick Face, from Thicktown, Thickania!" He paused for a moment, swayed a little and then added "And so's your Dad!"
Robin retaliated by lobbing another bauball at Ads, which again bounced off his head.
"Ow! Stop it!"
"Take it back then!" Robin called down.
"Take what back?"
"All that stuff you just said!"
Ads paused and thought for a moment, then shouted up "Dad ruoy s'os dna! Ainakciht, nwotkciht morf, ecaf kciht ytekciht kciht kciht retsim er'uoy! kciht os ruoy esuaceb! uoy wonk yhw? uoy evol I! uoy sti! oh-oh-oh-oh-ho!"
"Eh?" Robin and Padme's Sister (who had been silently pissing herself with laughter until that point) asked in unison. Then Padme's Sister flicker her fingers (an annoying habit I have now picked up) and pulled a mirror out of her pocket, holding it up to what Ads had just said.
"Oh! He's speaking backwards! Blimey! That's clever! Damned hard to type, but clever!"
"I know," Ads grinned stupidly, and then passed out.
"Speaking backwards?" Robin asked as he jumped off the branch and landed beside her. "I thought I said 'take it back', not 'wind it back'?"
Padme's Sister just shrugged.
oOo
Captain Jack Sparrow was wandering around a model of the Black Pearl that had appeared somewhere (don't know where though...), critisizing every little detail that was wrong.
"That rope's too short...that plank's not black enough...that sail's ripped too much...that cannon ball's too heavy..."
Just then there was a puff of blue smoke (coz we haven't had one of them for a while) and he turned back into Jack Harkness.
"Nooooooooooo! I want to be a Captain again!"
Erm, you are...duh!
"Oh...oh ya...he he...coolio! Hey, a word I've never used before and - "
Probably never will again?
"Yup. So where's the crew? Where's ma gang? Ma homies? Ma blood?"
Please don't.
"Don't what?"
Be something your not.
"Thats rich, coming from you!"
Stop right there!
"What, seriously...you maskerade all day as a responsible adult, when really your just a kid."
Ok, fair point. Now go do something random...this story's starting to get more sensible each chapter!
"GASP! SHOCK! HORROR!"
And don't be so dramatic.
"Spoil sport! I know, I'll go...erm...paint a dalek on a tree!"
Thats not random, thats just mental.
"There's a difference?"
Yes...no...do you know what? I'm not actually sure. I'M WALKING ON SUNSHINE! WOOHOO! I'M WALKING ON SUNSHINE! AND ITS TIME TO FEEL -
"I'm gonna go now."
Jack hurried away into the woods, pulling a huge gold necklace over his head and tying a bandana over his hair.
"Yo! Whats up ma homies!" he announced to a group of squirrels who were arguing over some nuts that...oh...hang on, that sounds dodgy. Let me rephrase that. They were arguing over some big nuts that...nope...try again. They were arguing over some round nuts...nope...ok, they were arguing over some peanuts...yeah! PEANUTS! They were arguing over peanuts! But then thats like saying they were arguing over nothing...hmmm...let me work on this and come back to it.
oOo
Meanwhile, Kates Master, Cloudhaven94 and Souless-tears were at the local car showroom, looking around the newest model of the Aston Martin DB9 .
"So what can you tell us about it?" Kates Master asked the salesman (who I'm gonna call Bob, despite the fact that his name tag says he's called Jim).
"Well, as you can see, its mostly carbon fibre, with power-assisted steering, airbags, alloys, sun roof, front and rear wheel drive, a six disk CD player, neons under the rims, three bottles of nitrous and nine drinks holders."
"Oooh! Sounds good!" Cloudhaven94 and Souless-tears nodded in agreement. Just then the doors burst open and the Doctor wandered in, wearing a long brown cloak over a tan coloured tunic. His sonic screwdriver hung from his belt, and he looked every part the Jedi he had now become.
"Excuse me, I'm interested in this fine motor too. Is there anything else you can tell us about it?" he said, and Bob shrugged.
"Nope don't think so."
"You will tell us what colours it is available in, whether it can handle travel in the Time Vortex, and if it is dimensionally transcendental," the Doctor -
"Ahem! Thats not my name anymore!"
Bugger! Its not? Oh yeah...sorry. So as I was saying, Docty-One Tardobi -
"Better."
Thanks. Well anyways, he said whatever he said a moment ago with a slight wave of his hand.
"Well I can tell you what colours it is available in, whether it can handle travel in the Time Vortex, and if it is dimensionally transcendental?" Bob replied, and Docty-One nodded.
"Carry on."
"Well erm...as you can see," Bob said, walking round to the back of the car and lifting up the boot. "Its got quite a large boot. That makes it dimensionally transcendental, I guess."
"A large storage compartment," Docty-One repeated thoughtfully. "Hmmm. Large enough for me, my apprentice, two droids...and no questions asked. Good. And how about the handling? Does it handle well?"
"Oh yes sir. There's a switch here, see?" Bob pointed inside to the display behind the steering wheel. "You can change between front, rear, or four wheel drive to suit whatever surface you're trying to cross."
"Good. And I see the speedo's metric. Thats good. No Imperial entanglement involved. Very good. How fast is it?"
"Well it can reach up to 210MPH Sir."
"210MPH? Can it outrun Imperial fighters?"
"I guess so."
"Ok good. My last ship couldn't."
"What did you have?" Kates Master asked.
"A long time ago, I had a Ford Galaxy, far far away." Then Docty-One turned back to Bob. "This light metalic colour's quite nice."
"Yes it is," Bob agreed.
"My last ship was a black Ford Focus, but the colour was a bit on the...dark side. But this is good."
Just then, Darth Vader walked in.
"Oh not you again," Docty-One groaned. Darth Vader brandished a baguette and waved it at Docty-One.
"My powers have increased since the last time we met. Then, I was but the apprentice. Now I am the Head Chef!"
"Really? You're roll's a little on the doughy side," Docty-One noted as he drew his own baguette on a clip board.
"Your cookery powers are week old man! Prepare to eat ham sandwich!" Darth Vader growled, launching an attack. Docty-one retaliated with his own baguette, and the two started a bread fight.
"Strike me down and you will lose you're no claims bonus," Docty-One warned as they duelled.
"Shit! Will I?" Darth Vader paused, looking mortified. "That wouldn't be good."
"Not good at all," Docty-One agreed. "How many do you have?"
"I've got four," Darth Vader replied.
"I've got six," Cloudhaven94 piped up.
"I've got three," Souless-tears added.
"I've got four too!" Kates Master replied triumphantly.
"Enough! Can we please get back to the fight?" Darth Vader asked.
"Oh yeah, sorry," Docty-One appologised, resuming the fight. Suddenly his baguette snapped in half.
"Bugger! Look, there's Luke!"
"Where?" Darth Vader spun on the spot, and Docty-One legged it out of the showroom, followed by Kates Master and Souless-tears. Cloudhaven94 was too busy pretending to drive the Aston to even notice.
"Brrrrrrruuuuuum! Eeeeeeeeeek. Vroooooooooooooom vrooooooooooooooooooom. E-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-eeeeeeeeeh. Vrooooooooooooooooooom! Nitrous! Yeah! Woooooo! A million miles an hour! VRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMM!"