Ch 5. Kiss me again

Title: A Spider's Poison

Author: LightningRose

It had been a week since she first arrived at Naraku's castle. Everyday was something different, Naraku would confuse her by acting like his normal, violent, evil self then turn around later or the next day and be someone she wished she could look at without seeing pain. She was stuck in the same room, never allowed to leave or wander about, the only escape she had was the balcony attached to her room. Kagome loved to lean against the balcony at night and gaze up at the sky, wondering if any of her friends were thinking about her. Once or twice she could feel some one watching her, and she knew Naraku was the one, she knew he could watch people through Kanna's mirror. But she didn't move or let him know that she knew she was being watched. It was strange but for some reason she didn't mind that he was watching her. She felt almost happy for attention. Though at times she would let her mind wander and caught herself thinking just maybe he wasn't watching her...but kikyo. Like Inuyasha always did when he looked at her.

"Kagome..."

She closed her eyes and just let the words sink in. It sent shivers throughout her entire body when she heard him speak her name. That deep masculine voice, her name coming off those perfect...kissable lips. She had to snap out of it, she shouldn't be thinking such wrong things and about HIM! He was right, he couldn't give her love and she shouldn't want love from him. Maybe he was right about her not being able to receive love at all, that they were the same. She would be alone forever...no, not alone...just lonely. She had him even if it wasn't she way she really wanted him. After the first few days she admitted to herself that she lusted him, he was gorgeous, fine features, beautiful long black hair that ran down his back like black silk. And those eyes, they weren't the amber eyes she thought she fell in love with. They were something new, so intense and captivating. They might have scared away others but not her, she could look into them for a life time if he let her. But these last few days something had changed, her feelings she felt were stronger than just your every day lust. She didn't know what she should do about it. She didn't want to get hurt again, she didn't want to lose another man she cared about. Should she tell him or forget these feelings, maybe they would disappear. He told her he couldn't love her but was that true or just him talking? She was broken out of her thoughts once again by his voice, her heart fluttered.

"Come back into the room." She let him command her around as if he were her master and she the slave girl. But they both knew it wasn't so. She turned away from the balcony and walked back into her room, he was there standing at the door waiting for her, watching her as she walked towards him. His eyes were too intense, they held something she had never seen before, at least not from him. Her heart began to race and she could feel herself blushing. She tried to hide her embarrassment from him, turning her head away to look at the floor. But he was before her, cupping her chin and pulling her face up to his. He wouldn't let her look away from him. He never let her, he always wanted her looking him in the eyes.

"Never look away from me. I want to see your eyes, I want to see your face." She didn't know why but what he said got her to thinking about her earlier thoughts. That maybe he was seeing Kikyo when he looked at her and not Kagome. It made her angry, it hurt her for some reason. She suddenly felt stiff and so angry at him. She knew she looked like Kikyo, that they shared the same soul but she was different, she wasn't Kikyo! She was Kagome, she didn't even have the same eye color, hers were a grayish blue where as Kikyo's were brown. She wouldn't fall for this again, not like she did with Inuyasha, she wouldn't be played the fool again!

"I'm not Kikyo!" she hadn't meant to say it, it just came out, she didn't know how he would react and a small part of her was afraid it would change the way he treated her, the way he looked at her. She didn't want him seeing her as Kikyo but she liked the way he looked at her with so much attention and something else she couldn't name.

"No...your Kagome. And I am not Inuyasha." He was angry, she knew he was upset with her over her accusing him of being like Inuyasha. He let go of her chin and began to walk away. But she wouldn't let him, not now...not after that. As he turned she stopped him by reaching out for his arm, her fingers latching onto his silk robes, grabbing hold of them tightly. She wouldn't let him walk away, she had to show him she didn't see Inuyasha when she looked at him. She never did, she saw so much more. It turned his body towards hers but not his face, he stared over her head, not giving her the pleasure of looking into his eyes. But she didn't need to use her eyes to show him.

"I know your not Inuyasha. Like I am not Kikyo, I am by Naraku's side...not Inuyasha's. And...I like it that way..." She said it, she told him that she liked being here with him, but now it was time to show him...make him believe her. Slowly stepping up on her toes, leaning forward and turning his questioning face towards her, she looked up into his eyes. Only shortly before she leaned in to brush her lips against his. A gentle but electrifying kiss. She heard him gasp against her lips, shocked that she would do such a thing, and she took full advantage of the opportunity. Pressing into the kiss harder she ran her tongue over his bottom lip and then shyly slipped it into his mouth. She knew she was blushing fiercely about now but she didn't care. She wanted to comfort him, like she always wished she could be comforted. Suddenly in the middle of the kiss she felt his arms wrap around her small waist and pull her up against him, he was kissing her back.. Their eyes closed, tongues battling for dominance, and lips massaging the other's. She hadn't been kissed more than a few times but she knew no kiss would ever make her feel as whole and loved as this one right here. He let go of her and separated himself from her. His eyes wide and he slowly brought a finger up to his lips...he looked so confused and vulnerable.

"I...Naraku...I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that, I just had to show you. I had to." She could feel the tears as they slid down her face, she didn't know why she was crying but she felt so heart broken and beaten. Life was so cruel, everything was keeping her from one moment of happiness. She fell to her knees and just broke down, her body shaking with sobs, she knew she shouldn't have cried in front of him, but she didn't care anymore. She lost.

"Why... Why are you crying?" She couldn't speak, only shook her head, she wanted him to leave just leave her and let her cry. He didn't want her, and she wouldn't give her heart away to him even when she knew it was a lost cause, hoping that maybe just maybe he would love her back someday. She couldn't do it, her heart couldn't handle that pain again. Maybe she should just leave, just leave this world and escape back to her own time. Seal the well and pretend she never came here.

"Stop your crying this instant! You accuse me of seeing Kikyo and not you, you assume me to be like your precious Inuyasha. Do not step out of your place Miko, you are in my territory, your friends are not here to protect you and no matter what you or any of them say or do you are mine! Do not be mistaken by my generosity towards you that you are safe to do as you please..." He was shouting in the deep booming voice of his, stopping her crying, stopping her thoughts. But he was wrong, she only wanted him to see her, she never saw Inuyasha, she only ever saw him! Standing up, tear stains on her cheeks, her eyes red and puffy. She didn't care if she looked horrible.

"I don't want Inuyasha! I want you Naraku! I was kissing you because I wanted to! When my friends come for me they will leave without me...unless you send me away, I am going to stay by your side. You say I am yours...well that makes you mine as well!" She stood in his face now, anger in her eyes, how dare he shout at her like that. He knew her to not take anything and not give any back. Grabbing her arms roughly he pulled her up against him, his lips hovering over hers. She wished he would just kiss her already.

"Then have me you shall." then he kissed her, and it was as remarkable as the first kiss.