Chapter 15: Fever
The Fuhrer decided to find out exactly what the Archer pictures were all about. He couldn't get an answer out of Archer, so he went to the next best thing. The large hulk of a man, Alex L. Armstrong slouched on the Fuhrer's couch.

Fuehrer Bradley sat across form him with the pictures on the table between them. Armstrong's embarrassment was apparent in baby blue eyes and his hands clasped low between his knees.

"So?" said the Fuhrer.

"Sir, I assure you, I did nothing but help him dance. He required someone of extra strength to execute particular moves." Armstrong sat up with a little bit of pride in his physical strength.

"He never…" Bradley gestured between them with an open palm.

Armstrong knew what he was asking and said "No sir. No…no funny business."

"Do you think his preferences lean that way?" asked the Fuhrer evenly.

"It never occurred to me, sir" answered Armstrong honestly.

"Not even when he appeared in a pink tutu?" pressed the Fuhrer.

"He was wearing red slippers. What gay man would ever make such fashion faux paux, sir?"

"True…true." Bradley nodded and smiled at Armstrong. "Fine then. Return to your duties, Major, and thank you for your time."

The Major left feeling lighter than when he went in. He wasn't surprised by the Fuhrer's inquiry. He was privy to Colonel Mustang's investigation.

Following Sila's admittance to the hospital an investigation team arrived to take a statement from her and Havoc. Havoc had not left the hospital since he arrived with Sila the night before and gave his statement just before she did.

When Sila explained to the investigators she had been snatched early in the day Havoc interrupted her "What do you mean? Around 10am? I visited you around 6 in the evening."

"Well maybe you're confused? I was definitely bound and gagged at that point."

"Archer came over too. You don't remember?"

"No, Havoc. Let's think about this. You came to see me at 6 and stayed how long?"

"I guess till 6:30-6:45."

"Jeez, I let you stay in my apartment that long?" she exclaimed.

The two investigators, discretely dressed in plain dark suits, made eye contact and rolled their eyes at Havoc and Sila's behavior.

"That's beside the point. Archer was there too" said Havoc.

"Did he leave before or after you?"

"After"

"Did you see him leave?" she asked.

"No" said Havoc, shaking his head.

"Okay, so he stayed till at least 7:00. You found me in the basement at like 7:15 on your walk home, right? How could that have possibly have happened?"

"Shit. Then who was that?" asked Havoc scratching his spiky haired head in confusion.

The investigators recognized a pattern "We'll get a hold of the Lieutenant Colonel and question him. Thank you both for your time."

As Sila watched them leave she said "I hope Archer is okay."

Havoc sighed at her concern for him and shook his head.


Archer was walking to his office after a debriefing session centered on the military's next military exercise. He knew he would not see the homunculus Sila Wellbrick and did not question her absence from the office. His mind was focused on his duties when a single whispered word caught his ear. A few enlisted men were passing him in the hallway and the word "Faggot" crossed their lips.

Frank almost hesitated but continued a normal pace 'Was that about me? No I'm just being paranoid.'

After rounding the corner Archer spied another two enlisted men. One who was talking quietly but motioning frantically with his hands said "Archer's gay! He's a total homo!"

The second soldier looked over the shoulder of his friend and the two soldiers saw they were standing in the shadow of Archer himself. Light poured in a large window from behind Frank, giving him an especially ominous appearance. The two solders jumped to attention. Frank took two precise and loud steps towards the now shaking soldiers.

The Lieutenant Colonel narrowed his eyes and looked down his nose at the two men. He asked very calmly "Archer? Archer who?"

The young man spreading the rumor stuttered "uh….uh…"

The Lieutenant Colonel looked down at the squirming soldier and thought of all the other Archers on the base '…what a fool…'

Frank said "If you are so unsure of the subject of your gossip perhaps you should not be spreading it. In addition, the type of rumors you are spreading are rather detrimental to the man's career." Archer closed in and said with a sneer "and perhaps yours as well. What is your name soldier?"

"I-I-I'm" stuttered the soldier.

"Don't know your own name soldier? Perhaps you are the faggot-Archer. I know I'm not him."

"Sir NO Sir!"

"Your name" commanded Frank.

"Barq! Pendler Barq, sir!" he responded.

Archer relented and got back on his path. He passed the men's room and had the urge to wash his hands. He decided to wait for his own personal restroom. He strolled into his office naturally past Galit.

Once he closed the door behind him he ran to the lavatory and began to t scrub his hands. He took off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves to scrub his arms. 'The dirt! Bradley, Kimbley, and that homunculus! All the filth!' When he saw his hands bleeding he knew he was clean. "Dammit!" He pulled out some band aids and put on some gloves. 'I took a little eccentric, but it's cleaner looking than my bandaged hands.'

That afternoon the investigators came by Archer's office. Archer recounted the events of the evening, but instead of explaining what happened concerning the homunculus he said he went home. He wanted to keep the information on Envy for his own department, and his personal life a secret.

Archer thought 'With promotion time just around the corner I can't have rumors flying.'

Before they left the team explained that Sila was in the hospital and Archer's suspicions changed. He played dumb and made a note to have his own division take over the case of her abduction. 'But who will I ask to approve the paperwork? I can't go back to the Fuhrer in person.'

Frank thought about the look in Bradley's eyes as he handed Frank a glass of Brandy. Archer shuddered at the thought. He decided on submitting a written request instead of seeking permission in person. 'If my request is denied I will have to go in person.'

Archer frowned at the thought and picked up his coat. He left the office early to visit Sila in the hospital. When Archer arrived the nurse in reception pointed him in the right direction. He found her sleeping and impatiently tried to wake her. When she did not rouse immediately he became alarmed.

He shook her arm and called her name. 'Her color is off…' He also noticed the sheen on her skin. 'Is she feverish?' Sila moaned and Archer lifted her eyelids. Her eyes rolled up into her head. "Nurse!"

Frank knew that look. It was the look of pending death. Her sickly pallor shined with sweat and her eyes were not focused. Archer's panic rose and he called for a nurse again. She sped over and saw the situation. She ran for the Doctor and Frank backed away from the bed. 'I thought it was just a sprain?'

The doctor returned and gave the nurse some orders. He shooed Archer into the hallway as the Lieutenant Colonel demanded to know what was happening. "She has a fever" snapped the doctor. Then he slammed the door in Archer's face.

Archer, dumbfounded that the doctor would treat him that way headed back to the office. 'That piss-ant. Does he know who I am?' Archer was concerned for Sila, but knew he could do no good there. He asked a nurse at reception to alert him to any change in Captain Wellbrick's status and left.

As Frank stalked back to the base he remembered watching his father being pushed out of his mother's room the day she died of fever. Frank shook off the memory and walked with more determination back to his office.

When Frank arrived at his office he decided to write up a proposal to submit to the Fuhrer. The proposal would center around elimination of the Homonculi.

The Fuhrer received an envelope from the office of Lieutenant Colonel Frank Archer. The Fuhrer's heart skipped a beat hoping it would be some secret that he and his pixie-man could share. As his eyes scanned the paper his man-crush shattered his big heart into pieces.

'But you are my pixie-man! How could you hate me?' thought the Fuhrer as he read Franks words:

…All Homunculi must be eliminated. No matter the cost in monies or manpower, these creatures must be extinguished. They are hiding amongst us as evil seeds, possibly planted here to deceive and destroy mankind. I propose to find as much information about them as I can in order to best know our enemy and bring them to their knees...

The Fuhrer removed his eye patch and allowed his eye of the Uroburos to gaze on Frank's writings. He mumbled "If you wanted me on my knees all you had to do was ask, my little pixie." The Fuhrer gripped the papers in front of him and balled them into crumpled balls of paper. 'Why does he hate me? What did I ever do?' the Fuhrer held back some tears and sniffled. 'I must find out where this hatred of Homunculi comes from. Is he pushing me away for that Captain Wellbrick? If so, I think something rather unfortunate may happen to our little Captain. Oh pixie-man!'

Colonel Mustang sat his desk gazing out the window. He leaned on his fist and tried to think of something other than work.

'Being Fuhrer…' Roy closed his eyes and imagined standing at a podium in the long coat of a Fuehrer with Riza Hawkeye at his side as the Lieutenant Fuhrer. The crowd in front of him showered him with praise and he waived to them. He decided to walk amongst the people and went down into the crowd, sending his personal guards into a frenzy.

Riza kept up with him and he could hear her voice "Sir! Sir!"

Roy turned away from her and looked into the crowd. Now that he was in the midst of them could see they were all women. Over all the giggling praise form the lovely ladies of the crowd he could still hear Hawkeye "Sir! Sir!"

He kept moving forward. His elation was only topped when he realized his new uniform policy had already gone into effect and the women of the crowd were all wearing mini-skirts. The Colonel opened his arms wide to invite the crowd of adoring mini-skirt wearing female officers.

He heard "SIR!" coming more sternly than before. "SIR!"

He then felt a firm hand on his shoulder. It shook him and the adoring crowd of miniskirt soldiers faded away. The Colonel woke to Lieutenant Hawkeye shaking his shoulder "Sir! Sir! You're drooling on the Major's orders!"

Roy sat up and wiped the drool form the corner of his mouth and pulled away from the orders he was signing.