Author's Notes: More thanks to PhDelicious for her beta-ing. And, as always, for your interest in my story;)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Last Embrace
by Kristen Elizabeth
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
December 1981
"Ma'am, can you tell me what happened?"
Her jaw ached with each movement as she replied to the young officer's question. "I tripped on the hallway rug. Went right down on the edge of the banister."
"And that's how you sustained the injury to your eye." He made a note of this. "What about your arm?"
Laura looked down at the sling that was immobilizing her recently dislocated shoulder. "Must have twisted when I tried to stop my fall."
Telling a lie was like working a muscle. They got stronger with time and practice.
Even though he was a rookie, the cop wasn't stupid. "The doctors say this isn't your first accidental fall, Mrs. Sidle."
"What can I tell you?" She could still taste blood in her mouth. "I've never been really graceful." The nurse who was tending to her exchanged a look with the officer. Laura closed her uninjured eye; the other was already swollen shut. "Where are my kids?"
"They're fine. Another nurse took them upstairs," her nurse told her. "They're having a party for the children on the pediatric floor."
The officer cleared his throat. "Well, I guess we're done. Unless you have anything to add. Mrs. Sidle?"
"No," she whispered. "It was an accident."
"Right." Nodding at the nurse, he started for the door, but stopped at the last second. "Hell of a way to spend Christmas Eve. 'Specially for kids." Laura looked away, and he sighed. "See you next time."
Once he was gone, the nurse finished her own notes and hung the chart at the end of the exam bed. "Get some rest," she said. She was polite, but not warm. Like most ER nurses. "I'll be back to check your vitals."
Laura waited a full five minutes after the nurse drew the curtain back around her bed before she slipped out of it. Her head spun, but it cleared after a moment, and she set out in search of the elevators.
She could hear children's laughter before the doors even opened. Just around the corner from the nurses' station, the party was in full swing. Santa Claus held court, handing out presents to boys and girls, most of whom were hooked up to portable IV stands.
It took her a second to locate her own children. Adam had separated himself from the party, preferring instead to watch television on the other side of the waiting room. He was thirteen and hadn't believed in Santa Claus for years.
But Sara had only just turned ten a few months earlier. She still wanted to believe. Laura saw that plainly now, as she watched her daughter hesitantly inch her way through the flock of children who swarmed around St. Nick.
When it was her turn, Santa picked Sara up and set her on his knee. "Ho ho ho! And what's your name, little girl?"
"Sara Sidle."
"Sara. Have you been good this year?"
Her little forehead scrunched up in deep thought. "I think so. But sometimes I make Daddy mad."
Santa looked uncomfortable. This wasn't part of the usual dialogue. "What do you want for Christmas, Sara?"
She considered this for another second. With her hands cupped around her mouth, she whispered something into Santa's ear. Something that made his jolly expression sag.
Having finished her request, Sara looked up at him expectantly.
"Well, Sara…" Santa cleared his throat. "There's only so much my elves can do." He reached into his big bag and pulled out a colorfully wrapped package. "Here. Merry Christmas."
A light died in her daughter's eyes. And it hurt Laura worse than any of the punches she'd taken that night.
Sara slid off Santa's lap. Her sandals slapped against the floor as she marched to the nearest trash can and threw her present away. When school started again, she was sent to the principal for the first time ever for telling her entire class that Santa Claus wasn't real.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nick's parents took Cassie after the wake. The whole Stokes clan would be leaving in the morning, and they wanted as much time with her as possible. Sara had no objections. Cassie adored her grandparents, and loved being around her cousins. She was so much like Nick in that regard. A little social butterfly.
When the last guest had gone, leaving behind food and condolences, Sara looked at her mother. "We're out of milk," she said. "I'm going to go get some."
Laura wasn't fooled. Sara didn't really care.
The sun had shone throughout the interment, but now clouds had gathered in the sky, and it threatened to rain on the freshly filled-in grave. The marker was simple, at his request. No Bible passages or melodramatic messages. Just his full name and two dates.
She should have gone back to her car when she felt the first drops. But she stayed rooted to the spot, unwilling to leave Nick to the elements just yet. Soon, she was soaked and shivering.
The umbrella came out of nowhere, shielding her from the storm. Sara blinked water out of her eyes and looked up at the man holding it over her head.
"He wouldn't want you to get sick," Warrick said. "What are you doing here?"
"The house is so quiet," she said a moment later. "I never realized…how alive he made everything around him. Just by being there."
"Yeah. I know."
Sara's teeth chattered ever so slightly. Somehow Warrick managed to shrug out of his coat and drape it over her shoulders, while keeping the umbrella lifted.
"Thanks." They stood in silence for several minutes, until Sara spoke again. "I know that you know…everything."
"I know enough."
"I loved him, Warrick. Maybe we didn't get off on the most traditional foot, but…" She looked down at her shoes. "He wasn't a replacement. When I was with him…I was with him. No one else." The lump in her throat was painful. "Please tell me he knew that."
Warrick released a pent-up breath. "You know…you could've knocked me on my ass with feather when he told me you were pregnant and that the two of you were getting married. But you can't fake the kind of happy he was about all of it. He loved you, Sara. He adored Cassie. What more is there to say?"
Her lower lip trembled, but it wasn't from the cold. "We started our life together with questions…but he never asked any of them. Not even the big one, Warrick."
"He didn't have to. He didn't care about the details, Sara." Warrick paused. "What he saw was that someone he cared about was suffering. If Nick had one purpose in the world, it was to help people, especially the people he loved. Did he help you?"
Sara nodded tightly. "He made me smile when I thought I never would again."
"There's your answer. He knew." Warrick looked down at her. "Let's go." He looked down at the freshly turned earth. "Nick's not here. He's somewhere better. And probably a little pissed off that I haven't gotten you out of the rain yet."
Putting his arm around her shoulder, he tried to lead her away. But her mind was elsewhere, and she couldn't bring herself to move just yet.
"Grissom didn't come, did he?" She tucked a wet lock of hair behind her ear. "Catherine said he was coming…did you see him?"
"No. But I wasn't holding my breath." Warrick cocked his head towards their cars.
Sara glanced back at her husband's final resting place as they walked away. "Neither was I."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
To Be Continued
