/on days
like
this
you know who your
friends are…..
I'm glad you're on
my side still-Taxi Ride/
Sometimes Yagami felt invisible.
Lonely.
Pathetic.
Not because no one noticed him.
And not because he was alone.
No.
It wasn't any of those things.
But sometimes.
Like when he's in a room full of his "friends"….
He feels like a fly on the wall.
Watching.
Waiting for his turn.
Maybe it was because he never felt GOOD ENOUGH.
Maybe it was because in the back of his mind….something told him…he didn't BELONG here.
Clay was the smart one.
Zero was the brave, outgoing one.
Roose was the friendly one.
Hiead was the silent and brooding one.
And Yagami was….
Well he was….
Nothing….no one.
He had no niche to fill.
Maybe that's why he tried so hard to get Zero's attention.
Because if he could just get Zero to acknowledge him…
To fight him as his equal…then maybe…
MAYBE
Yagami would have a purpose there.
He was almost sure he'd never become a pilot.
Not after Hiead happened.
It was in that moment…those few seconds when he thought everything was really over…he felt IT…that feeling of KNOWING that you DON'T matter.
And every time Hiead sat at their table it was a reminder…that if Hiead had killed him it would have only fueled Zero's and his competition more.
Hiead would still be sitting at the table.
He would still be sitting there…and no one would notice the empty spot near Roose.
Roose…
There were times Yagami felt that Roose might be the only one…who could kinda, sorta, maybe CARE about him.
Or maybe Roose was just the kind of person who happened to notice flys…
But even so.
If Yagami HAD to give himself a title….he would be Roose's best friend.
Well he hoped so.
And for now…that was enough.
It had to be.
Roose was enough to give being at GOA some purpose.
And Roose was enough to make Yagami WANT more than this.
Because it was good to know he mattered to someone.
Even if that someone was a weak, glutton.
EVEN if that someone was a weak, glutton with a big heart.
Especially if that.