"State your name for the record."

"Haruno Sakura."

The questioning is pretty standard. They ask me if the person who attacked me is in the room. I say "yes, one of them." and I point out Kimura. She's sitting next to Takeo. He looks all better now, and upset, but she is still bandaged. Every time she moves she winces, and I hope that it's from real pain, not just some ploy to gain sympathy. Their lawyer looks bored. I feel kind of sorry for the guy; having to defend two people who have no chance at being found innocent, and who he probably doesn't even like himself. Nobody likes a traitor, or at least that's what I've been raised to believe.

"Can you describe the attack on your person for the court please?" the prosecutor asks, and I tell them about the attack, exactly as it happened. There are a lot of people in the room; more than I expected. People are crowded into the benches, and standing around the edges. It's got to be a fire hazard.

Gaara and Temari are here too. They're sitting with a bunch of government officials, and Kankuro, who somehow managed to keep out of politics, unlike his siblings. I haven't seen much of him until today, and now it's only from this uncomfortable seat across the room from everyone.

I feel strangely unemotional while I'm describing what happened. I expected to feel more anger, or pain, or something, but instead I feel cold. I wonder if there's something wrong with me.

The prosecutor doesn't ask me many questions. My account of the night is enough to condemn Kimura in his eyes. He also asks me about earlier, about the day I saved the three traitors, when I brought them to the hospital. I tell him everything I know.

Once he's done he thanks me and sits down. I watch him for a while, during the time it takes the defendant to get himself ready. He doesn't look happy; he doesn't even look smug. The air in this room is so heavy, in fact, everyone seems so sad. Everyone except me that is.

"Miss Haruno," the defendant says as he steps towards me, bringing my attention to him. "What happened that night, after you were attacked?"

"There was smoke everywhere, from the smoke bomb. I found Luo lying on the ground and then… I waited. Once the smoke cleared I realized Luo was still alive, so I used my medic skills to heal his wound, as best as I could. When I was done there was a crowd in the room, and then I fainted."

"That's it? You just… fainted?"

"Well, first I tried to stand, and then Temari said something behind me, she told Gaara to take a look at… at Kimura. When I turned to see I fell over, and then I lost consciousness."

"Gaara?" he asks disapprovingly.

I blush deeply. What a thing to say, in front of this many people, all of them his people. "The Kazekage I mean. I used to… Well, I don't think that matters."

"Please Miss Haruno; anything you have to say could be important. Pease tell the court what you used to do."

I shrug. I hate this part most of all. Where they try to twist my words to suit their case. "I used to call him Gaara – we all did – when I was young, when I first met him at the chuunin exams. I guess old habits die hard."

"Isn't it true that he almost killed you at that time?" he asks me, surprising me. How did it come to this?

"Objection. Where is the validity of this line of questioning?" The prosecutor interrupts, much to my relief.

"Are you going somewhere with this?" The judge asks the defendant. "Somewhere that pertains to this case?"

The defendant nods. "Only to prove that maybe there is another traitor in this room."

"What are you implying?" I ask the man. I'm starting to feel angry, but it is cold still. Not the old burning anger I would feel at injustices, but detached somehow. Is this what it feels like to grow up?

"Did you fear Gaara then?" he asks me.

"Yes." I answer, because I can't lie. "I did."

"Did you wish him dead?" he asks, pushing me.

"I didn't think it was possible." I answer. Even in this state it's hard for me to come up with a good, truthful answer to that.

"If it was possible?"

"I don't know…" I start to answer, still thinking like myself, the me from today. But then I realize; I wasn't always like this, and I know my truth. "No." I answer firmly.

"Even though he tried to kill your friends, to destroy your country?"

I wonder how he can even be talking about this? How can he ask me about this horrible thing that his country did to mine in the past? I realize that he's probably just trying to get me worked up, to get me to slip, and show some resentment towards Suna. I wonder what Gaara is thinking right now, having his past talked about like this, in front of so many people.

"No." I answer again. "I didn't want him dead. I didn't want anyone dead back then; when we were young we didn't believe in killing people."

"Who is this 'we' you keep referring to? It can't possibly be any shinobi in this room, knowing how we train our youth."

I look at the prosecutor. How can he let this go on? He doesn't respond to my gaze, so I return my focus to the man questioning me. What else can I do?

And the worst part is, I know who I keep talking about, but I don't want to tell this man. Not because it's damning evidence, but because it's personal. I doubt I could use that as an excuse though. "My cell, from when we were genin. Naruto and Sasuke and I."

"All leaf ninjas, yes? From Konoha, like you are?"

The prosecutor stands then. "This is leading nowhere your honor!"

The judge nods. He turns to the defendant and tells him to move on. "I have yet to see this getting you anywhere, please keep to the case at hand, and stop wasting my time."

"Yes of course. Sorry your honor."

I take a deep mental breath. Any pity I felt for this guy earlier is gone now. Any pity I felt for anyone in this room is gone, for letting him pick at me like that for no reason. It feels like all he did was provide the court with plenty of gossip about me.

I look across the crowd, to see how they're reacting. My gaze falls on Gaara. He is glaring at the defendant something fierce. I guess he doesn't like his prying either. When Gaara looks up and meets my gaze I realize I've been staring at him, and quickly face the lawyer standing in front of me again.

"Yes, Luo is alive." I answer; glad I somehow manage to keep my attention divided as I do.

"How many times did you hit Kimura?"

"I'm not sure. I wasn't exactly keeping count."

"With your skills Miss Haruno, isn't it true that one blow is usually enough?"

I nod.

"And yet you hit Kimura at least twice, as she has told the court. With the damage done to her body it is likely you continued hitting her after she was down, wouldn't you say?"

"No I wouldn't. I don't…"

"Did you not just say you can't remember?"

I nod. "But I wouldn't have continued beating her – I thought Luo was dead!"

"Isn't it possible, considering how little you can remember of that night, that you were so upset, thinking your dear friend was dead, that you went after Kimura, hitting her repeatedly?"

"I was looking after Luo; I never had time."

"You told the court earlier that while the smoke cleared you were just… waiting?"

"Yes."

"What do you remember of that time? Do you remember what happened then, or is it truly, just a blank in your memory, a space of time you can't account for?"

"I…" I had never considered that before. Was I really waiting? Was I just sitting there, waiting? What was I waiting for?

"Do you need to see a patient's injuries to heal them?"

"No, not really. I can feel them." I answer; glad to be talking about something I can really answer.

"So why would you have waited in that moment? Could you not have felt Luo's injuries, and healed him, despite the smoke? What were you waiting for?"

"I'm not sure." There is no rational explanation for waiting, I know. But until now, it never seemed to matter. "It was just… instinct."

"Hm." The defendant turns away from me for a moment, and for that moment I think he's done, that he's going to sit back down, and I'll be free to leave. I'm getting ready to bolt when he swivels back at me and asks. "Do you like the Kazekage, Miss Haruno?"

I freeze. What am I supposed to answer to that? How am I supposed to answer that? I look at Gaara again; he's watching me closely, just like the rest of the court. I search around for any feelings he conjures up in me, and even though at the moment I feel cold inside, there is something there, under all that ice. I do actually feel something, because of that small, intimidating man.

"Yes, I do." I say quietly, staring at my hands, at the same moment as the prosecutor jumps up to protest the question. He speaks so loudly, and I so quietly, that I doubt anyone hears me, and I'm glad. I can feel a blush creeping up onto my cheeks. The judge dismisses the question. Most of the defendants argument was dismissed it seems.

"Is there anything else?" the judge asks the defendant. He stares at me for a bit before shaking his head.

"No your honor. I have no further questions."

"Then you may step down, Miss Haruno." the judge says. I look up at him and he nods imperiously. "Thank you for your time."

I nod and step out, still looking at my hands. I'm afraid to look up, afraid I'll see him.

And yet, as I walk past him, I do look up, but he isn't looking at me. He's staring straight ahead; intent on what the judge is saying, and the second witness being called. And I feel… disappointed.

Temari meets my gaze and grins at me. I smile in return and walk out of the courtroom, escorted by two guards.

Out in the hall one of them turns to me and smiles. "That wasn't so bad was it?" he asks, and I smile. He walks me back to my room, and once we get there he tells me that he'll be waiting outside guarding me for the rest of the day. If I need anything I just have to ask, he tells me.

I thank him and go inside. My chest feels strange, sort of hollow. I walk into my bedroom, and sigh deeply once the door is closed, hoping no one can hear me through two walls.

It's then that I notice my cactus is missing. I search through my bedroom, and when my frantic search turns up nothing I look through the rest of the rooms, but I can't find it anywhere.

After one last turning over of my room I lie down in bed and cry myself to sleep.