I can't really write anything because I'm in a hurry right now, but I want to thank everybody for your patience since lately I've been busy and I haven't updated much. Sorry!

Disclaimer: I don't own The Outsiders.

18 – Appearances are deceiving

"He's said his first word!"

"It didn't sound like a word to me, more like babbling…which he does all the time!"

"No way! He really said it, he said 'dad'!" Sodapop insisted. "Come on, Jesse James, say it again…say 'dad'!"

I stared at Soda, who was holding our ten month old baby, who just looked down at him with his bright blue eyes.

"He'll say it when he wants to. Right, sweetie?" I kissed Jesse James, who smiled. Soda grinned and I felt so proud, because their smiles were exactly the same.

"D'you want some hot chocolate?" I asked. It was early December and it was freezing.

"Sure! I'd never turn down chocolate."

"Okay. Be back in a while." I kissed both Soda and Jesse James before leaving the living room and entering the kitchen. I was thinking of Ponyboy and his old girlfriend.

She's not old, a voice inside my head said, she's only 27.

But she's too old for him.

It isn't any of your business, really.

I know, but…

I burned myself a little with the chocolate and I cursed. I wished Ponyboy would tell Soda and I about the woman. Well, at least Soda. He had always told us about his girlfriends before, and brought them home. But I saw why he wasn't going to do it this time.

As I brought Soda his filled cup, I heard it. Jesse James really pronounced it clearly. "Dad!" he cheered.

"Sibyl, you heard? You heard? I told you!" Soda was so excited, I hadn't seen him like that for a long time. He grinned, first at me and then at our baby. "That's my boy! Now you can start saying 'mom', too!" he approved.

"How come his first word was 'dad' and not 'mom'?" I asked, pretending to be mad. I was beaming, though.

"Cause he wanted to surprise us!" Soda put him down and started drinking.

"He's not the only one."

"Sybil, you know we should trust Pony. He's always been mature for his age."

Maybe that's the problem… I thought, but didn't say anything. "I'll go take a nap, okay?" I hadn't slept well that night, partly because of a headache and partly because Jesse James had woken up more times than usual.

"Sure. I'll stay here and try to teach other words to our baby!"

I smiled as I walked upstairs. Sometimes I wondered who the real child was.

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When I woke up, I was feeling much warmer. Soda was beside me. "Hey…"

"Hi." I rolled over and buried my face in his chest. "What time is it?"

"Almost five."

I was still feeling sleepy, so I didn't move. Soda smelled so good. "Jesse's sleeping?"

"Yeah. He repeated the word 'dad' a couple times because I always cheered when he did, and he realized it was a good thing, then he muttered something that sounded like 'Jagger', but maybe my ears were playing tricks on me. I hope so. You been tryin' to make him say 'Mick Jagger rocks'?"

I smiled. "No."

"Darry came by."

Something in Soda's voice made me look up at him. "And?"

"It's supposed to be a secret, but since he'll announce it soon I guess I can tell." Soda grinned. "He's gonna get married to Diane."

"What?" I felt completely awake now.

"They're engaged and getting married next year, in spring."

"That's so great, Soda!" I remembered she was from Louisiana. We had only met her once so far. "But…where are they going to live?"

"Here in Tulsa. Darry convinced Diane to move here, she's never been too fond of her own town anyway."

I could tell Sodapop was happy his older brother was going to live near us and not in another state. "I hope she and I become good friends…"

"She doesn't know anyone else but Darry, and us, here, so I guess that'll be easy enough."

"What if she doesn't like me when we get to know each other?"

"That's impossible. Everybody likes you!" Soda grinned.

"And everybody loves you." I replied.

"I guess we're just one amazing family!"

As if on cue, Jesse James started crying and Soda went to get him. When he came back and our baby had calmed down, I asked him: "So is Diane going to be in town for Christmas?"

"I don't know, Darry didn't say."

"What about Pony? Do you think he'll want to spend Christmas with…" I trailed off.

"Naw, Pony loves us! Right, baby?"

Jesse James seemed happy and shook his head. "Dada!"

"No, you have to say 'dad'!" Soda reminded him. He shook his head again and started babbling incoherent words.

"This is gonna be Jesse's first Christmas." I said. "I want to buy him something real nice."

And so the following week I hurried to finish getting presents for everyone. I loved Christmas and I loved seeing all the decorations and lights that were almost everywhere in Tulsa by that half of the month.

"We're going shopping today, Jesse. We need to buy lots of gifts!" I told Jesse James as I put on him some heavy clothes to keep him warm.

"Who?" He asked. He was starting to learn new words everyday. It was so adorable when he talked, or tried to.

"You mean who we're buying them for?" I said. "For friends, for your uncles Pony and Darry, and maybe for your daddy too, if we find something nice."

"Daddy!" he repeated.

"Yeah. And we'll get something for you as well."

"No!" he complained, trying to take off his gloves.

"It's very cold outside, you're gonna need them. Don't take them off!"

He looked disappointed and kept pulling at them for a while, but eventually stopped.

When we got to the mall, I only had time to get a present for Julie before I saw Ponyboy with a girl.

He didn't see me and I stared at them: the girl barely reached his shoulder and she had short dark hair. She looked way older than him. She looked older than 27 and I didn't like her.

"I should stop obsessing…" I decided to head the opposite direction to continue shopping. As I pushed Jesse James's stroller close to some toy store, though, I heard someone call out my name.

"Sybil, hi! Hey, Jesse, how are you?" Ponyboy had reached us and was now kneeling down to Jesse James' level, smiling at him.

"Hi!" Jesse James replied happily.

"Are you getting presents? I was just walking around with Ashley." He introduced me to her. "She's a friend."

"Nice to meet you! Ponyboy's told me a lot of things about you." She smiled at Jesse James. "Hey there! You're so cute!" She looked at me again: "Your child is adorable!"

"Thanks…" I didn't know what to say. "So…you're friends, how did you meet?"

"At the editor's. We came from there and thought we'd stop by for a coffee or something." Ponyboy explained.

"Up!" Jesse James cried, extending his arms towards his uncle.

"Not now, baby, uncle Pony's busy…"

"You kidding? Come here, buddy." Ponyboy took him and held him in his arms, while Ashley smiled. "We'll have a walk with you."

I nodded. Something wasn't right there. Ponyboy was acting too friendly and show-off for someone who's got a secret girlfriend. She left not much later and I observed Ponyboy as he talked to Jesse James and entertained him, while we went through random stores. It didn't seem like Ponyboy was disappointed Ashley had left. It didn't seem like he was even thinking about her.

It was all very confusing.

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Christmas day was pretty eventful. Jesse James didn't wake up until ten in the morning, so Sodapop, Ponyboy and I had some time to fix things around the house, since Darry and Diane were coming for lunch.

Ponyboy hadn't invited anyone to come over. At the end of the day, I was tired of pretending I didn't know about him and Ashley and while the two of us were in the kitchen, peeling potatoes, I started questioning him. "Are you still going out with Ashley?"

"We see each other once in a while." He replied, not noticing the way I had spoken.

"Are you…in a serious relationship with her?"

Ponyboy stopped peeling potatoes and looked at me: "What?"

"I know it's not my business, I was just wondering if you and Ashley are-"

He interrupted me: "What makes you think I'm dating her?"

I suddenly felt stupid by the way Pony was staring at me, his eyebrow raised. "I…oh, alright! Sodapop told me so, almost two months ago, and I couldn't believe you were going out with someone who's six years older than you but…"

"We're not going out!" Ponyboy laughed. "That's ridiculous! She only helps me with my short stories and stuff, she's a good friend, and… she's the daughter of my publisher. We talk a lot about business and such. And by the way, she's nine years older than me, if you must know."

I must've looked really shocked because Pony started laughing and he couldn't stop. When I was able to say something, I called: "Soda!"

"Yeah?" he yelled from the other room. I repeated what Ponyboy had just said, and Sodapop quickly entered the kitchen: "But I saw you two acting all lovey-dovey in some cafè…" he exclaimed.

"I don't know what lovey-dovey means to you, we were simply talking and having a good time. We're good friends." Pony replied. "You see, appearances are deceiving."

"So you aren't a boytoy after all?" Soda asked, grinning. Pony punched him playfully. "How could you believe I was dating a thirty year old?"

I sighed. "Men!"

"Come on, don't make that face. I promise you'll forget all of this when you open my present!" Soda grinned.

"It better be good." I joked.

Jesse James received more gifts than everyone else, but that was to be expected. When I opened Sodapop's present, I couldn't believe my eyes: he had bought me a pair of earrings that I had seen a couple of months before in Tulsa's mall and I had not looked twice at because they were too expensive. "You're crazy!"

"I know. Do you like 'em?"

"I love them!" I kissed him. "I was going to say 'You shouldn't have' but I can't really say it, because they're lovely and this is the best gift I've gotten in a while!" I looked at Jesse James, who was being held by Darry. "After our baby."

"This is the best Christmas for me." Soda whispered. "And I'm relieved Pony's not dating Ashley after all."

"Me too. Next time, we oughta trust him."

"Yeah, we ought to."