Hey guys, I'm updating and I'm really happy to do so! Sorry for making you all wait this long. I hope you like the chapter, even if there's kind of a cliff-hanger at the end… don't hate me!

Disclaimer: I don't own the Outsiders.

21 – The Times They Are A-Changin'

"I'm completely stuffed. I think I won't eat for a week."

I smiled. "Yeah, sure."

"What?" Soda replied. "I'm serious, I ate way too much! And yeah, it was very good by the way."

"I hope so! It's not every day that I cook a great welcome-back dinner for you. Even if you were only away for a week." I looked at the sink and sighed. There were lots of dishes to wash now.

Soda assured me he had enjoyed it all very much and Ponyboy agreed. Jesse James had eaten different things, obviously, but he had tasted something of our dinner as well.

Ponyboy cleared his throat. "I need to tell you guys something."

Soda and I looked at each other and then at him. He half-smiled: "It's not bad news, don't worry… well, it's just, I graduated from college a year ago... I couldn't have made it without your support, I couldn't have published some of my stories without you, you've been so important to me… You are still important, you all and Darry are my family and I'm grateful to you… but I think it's time I make it on my own…"

I knew what he was going to say next and my heart almost sank.

"I've been looking around and I found a nice flat downtown that I can afford and I thought of...moving in next month. I didn't tell you sooner because…" He paused. "Because I knew Sybil would stare at me like that and it makes me feel like I'm stabbing both of you in the back…"

He was right, I didn't realize it but I was probably looking at him in a reproachful way. "You don't have to move out! Soda and I love having you here and you're part of the family!" I exclaimed. "You can live with us as long as you wish, even till you get married if you want to!"

I could hear Soda laugh beside me. "Come on, Sybil. Pony ain't a kid anymore, he's probably tired of having to cope with the two of us." He grinned and his brother blushed. "That's not true."

I was starting to feel really sad but didn't want to show it, I didn't want to make Ponyboy feel bad about his decision. After all, he was right, he was twenty-two… but he was still the same fifteen year old kid I had met and known when I'd started going out with Sodapop. "If you're sure you want to live alone… it's fine to me… but I'm going to miss you a lot!"

"You'll still see me all the time!"

Jesse James was listening to us and drooling on his stuffed toy in the meantime. He looked fascinated by our conversation.

"Come on, it's time to get to bed!" I got up and pulled Jesse James away from his seat.

"Not late!" he complained, still staring intently at Ponyboy.

"Yeah it is!" I walked away from the kitchen holding him in my arms. "I'm going to tell you a beautiful story."

"What story?" he asked me as I was changing him into his pajamas.

"The story of Nutcracker and the King of mice." That tale had been a favorite of mine since I was Jesse James' age. My mom had probably narrated it to me at least a thousand times and it never grew old. I had only tried to tell it to my child a couple of times since his birth, but he had always fallen asleep before the end and I'd never had the chance to finish it all.

That night was different. Jesse James listened to the whole story and when it was over he wanted me to tell it once again. I smiled: "Maybe tomorrow, okay? Do you want me to sing you the song of the Little Star?"

"Yeah."

I sang the song that once again was one favorite of mine since childhood. Jesse James was asleep by the end. "Night, teddybear." I kissed his forehead and left the room to go downstairs, but Soda was waiting for me just outside the door. "Hey…" he whispered. "Are you in a nostalgic mood?"

"Actually… yes, I am." I nodded and started walking downstairs. Soda followed me. "Pony's gone out to get some ice cream."

I turned to look at him in disbelief: "What, still hungry? You said you weren't gonna eat anything for a week." I reminded him.

"That's why Pony's gone to get ice cream for you and him. I don't think I'll eat any…" he sighed. "Too bad."

"Don't make that face, you can eat some tomorrow." I replied.

"No, I meant… too bad Ponyboy's going to live on his own. It's going to be a lot different without him here."

"Why did you tell him he could go and do it then?"

"Cause he wants to and he's got a right to do it. He can come back anytime, if things don't work, you know."

"You know if he leaves he won't come back to live here." I whispered. "It's like… when my brother left, when he was eighteen, after our mom had passed away… he travelled a lot and when he finally came back to Tulsa, he didn't want to live with dad and me again."

"That was different, he never got along right with your father, did he?"

I shook my head. "Still… I have this feeling like we're losing Pony."

Soda grinned. "You do realize he's your brother-in-law and not your son, I hope?"

"Stop making fun of me, of course I do! I think it's just… I didn't see this coming." I reasoned.

"I know. Me either." He put his arm around my waist and smiled: "Hey, I liked that Nutcracker story."

"You heard the whole story?"

"Yeah. I listened from outside the room. I like to listen to you when you tell Jesse James stories, you're so good at it."

"Maybe because the people who wrote those stories were good." I pointed out.

"Naw, you're good, full stop."

I was feeling better. "Thanks." I kissed him. "You must be tired, Soda, you got home a couple of hours ago… why don't you go to sleep?" He did look pretty tired.

"I'll go have a shower but I'll wait for you before going to sleep, okay?"

"Sure."

Soda had just disappeared upstairs when I remembered about the pills. I thought I'd ask him the following day.

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"Joan! Over here!"

"Hey, sorry I'm late!"

Joan reached Jesse James and me. We were sitting on a park bench; he was drinking milk out of his feeding bottle and I was enjoying an afternoon out with my child.

Joan sat next to me and took Zach out of his stroller. "I'm late because Adam and I kinda got into a fight…" she paused. "He wants us to go to the beach in August, when he has a couple of weeks off work, but I don't feel like going…"

"Why?" I asked. "You can bring Zach with you, in August he'll be one year old… it won't be hard-"

"I know, it's just… I'd like to spend some time with Adam alone, but on the other hand I don't even want to be selfish and leave Zach with our parents, you know? I guess we'll see. Are you and Sodapop going somewhere this summer?"

"I don't think so. It's June already and we haven't really discussed about it, so…" I shrugged. "What's wrong, Jesse James?"

He was staring at Zach like he was his worst enemy. Zach wasn't really aware of the situation.

"What about Helene, you heard from her?" Joan asked me.

"Not really… I think she'd tell us if she came back here for the summer, wouldn't she?"

"I guess. So… has Ponyboy moved out yet? I bet it's going to feel different without him in the house."

"Not yet, in a couple of weeks."

"Sodapop's lucky he gets along with his brothers so well. Adam sometimes looks like he's going to kill his brother, they aren't really that close."

"Well, you know… after Soda's parents' death, he had only Darry and Pony. They could only count on one another. I mean, they had friends, it's just… not the same."

We stayed in the park and then had a walk around until it was almost time to eat for our children, so we parted ways and went home. Jesse James had kept staring at Zach with aversion the whole time. He had never done it before and he had met him several other times already.

I checked the mail and found a letter from Lewis. I quickly read it before heading toward the kitchen to fix Jesse James' meal. I heard some noises from inside. No one was supposed to be home yet, so I cautiously peeked through the corner and saw Sodapop. He didn't notice me, he had his back toward the door. I was going to say something, and then I noticed what was going on.

He had just finished pouring some water in a glass and was now swallowing several pills. Definitely not aspirins.

"Soda!" I yelled. "What are you doing?"

He turned abruptly and the glass almost fell from his hands. "Sybil, hi…I thought-"

"What are you… what are those?" I asked. "You're taking drugs?" I whispered the last word. It sounded so weird, so foreign to me.

Sodapop looked away. "It ain't… what it looks like." He whispered.