Chapter 6

Jaina's leg had a cramp. She tried stretching, but that only brought to her awareness other parts of her body that were uncomfortably positioned. Finally she opened her eyes.

For a second she was too stunned by what she saw to move. She was curled—still—in the chair with Jag, partially atop him. He was asleep, both arms draped loosely over her in such a way that would make it extremely difficult to extract herself without waking him.

The situation was so alarming and awkward she panicked for a moment. She dare not move. Him waking this way would only make things more awkward still. So—very carefully—she lifted one of his arms off her and settled it on the other side of him. Very gently she slid off of him and onto the floor.

She stayed there a minute, breathing hard. What was going on? She didn't want to think about it. the best thing to do would be to pretend it never happened. Ignore it.

She rose and quickly tiptoed out of the room. Once on the other side of the door she leaned back on the doorjamb. This was too much. She needed something to drink.

As she nervously fixed a glass of water she noticed that the light on the message recorder was blinking again. Someone had called in the night. She went over and activated it.

A stony-faced Chiss appeared on the screen. "Colonel Fel, I regret to inform you that Shawnkyr Nuruodo passed on this morning at 0200 hours. As her superior officer, you need to report to the Medical Facility to fill out the appropriate paperwork and body release form. Thank you."

The message fizzled out. Jaina rocked back on her heels and chewed thoughtfully on her lower lip. The last thing she wanted to do was break this news to Jag. What was she going to do? Maybe she should just let him find the recording on his own. No. This was just something she had to do.

She looked up as the door to their bedroom swooshed open. Jag stood in the doorway, rubbing his eyes drowsily and looking wearier than she had ever seen him look. "What was that?" he asked.

"What was what?" she skirted.

"That message."

Jaina debated for a few seconds as how exactly to tell him. Finally she decided she should just be straightforward. That was the kind of person he was. "That was someone from the Med Center," she said softly.

"And?"

"They need you to come fill out some paperwork. Shawnkyr died last night. I'm so sorry."

Much to Jaina's surprise, he showed little outward reaction. He was like a blank wall. He was stoic and rigid, unmoving for several long minutes. And then he nodded, very slowly and with a definite air of sadness. Turning he said, "I guess I need to go change then."

Jaina looked undecidedly through the window of the parked speeder. She turned back to Jag and said, "Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?"

He nodded, but kept his eyes downcast. He didn't look so good, and she was a little worried. He was dropping her off at Touri's shop while he went to the Med Center to fill out the paperwork. He had said almost nothing all morning.

Reluctantly, Jaina climbed out of the speeder. As she closed the door she said, "All right. You don't have to pick me up. I'll just take a hovertaxi." He nodded again and pulled off. Jaina just stood in the cold. Then she shook her head and palmed open the entrance to the store.

She saw no one but could hear a rummaging behind the counter. "Touri, I hope you're under there by yourself," she said, leaning on the counter.

To her surprise, a male voice replied, "I'm not Touri, but I am by myself."

Jaina jumped back as a tall, handsome man stood up, wiping his hands on a cloth. "Who are you?" Jaina asked.

"Payton," he said, extending his hand. "Touri's my sister."

Jaina shook the hand cautiously. "Where is she?"

"Vacation. So, what can I do for you?"

She wasn't sure what to say. Mostly, she had just come to talk to her friend. "I just wanted to see Touri. I'll come back another time."

"You sure?" he asked, raising his eyebrows mischievously and grinning wryly. "She has a lot of good sales going on. Come on, let me show you." He left Jaina standing there and headed for the back of the store. She finally decided to follow.

He was waiting for her amongst a group of sales racks. "Everything here is marked down."

"Thank you," Jaina said. She did have all those extra credits lying around that her mother had sent her.

"No problem," he smiled dashingly again and went back to the counter.

It was a while before Jaina finished. She didn't really buy all that much, but liked how it took her mind off of things. Payton was waiting when she finished.

"So," he began as he rang up her order, "what do you do around here?"

By here she supposed he meant Csilla.

"I'm waiting for a squadron to accept my application. I'm a pilot." It sounded better than, my parents arranged a political alliance by marrying me off against my will.

He nodded. "I'm a mechanic. I'm just filling in today."

"A mechanic?" Jaina brightened.

And so it went. They talked for well over and hour, laughing and discussing everything from dogfights to food. They talked until Jaina was too hungry to stand up anymore. "I'm sorry," she said, checking her chrono, "I really have to get going. I think I'm going to pass out from hunger."

He grinned again. "It's about time for my lunch break. What do you say to coming with me?"

Jaina was poised to accept when she remembered one very important detail. She wasn't single anymore. And she would never be single again. The full weight of what her mother had done to her settled fully on her then. It wouldn't matter if she was attracted to Payton or any other man, if she ever fell in love. She was irrevocably tied to Jagged Fel, for now and always.

"I'm sorry," she murmured. "I'm married, Payton."

His smile faded. "Oh." Then it returned almost as quickly as it had left. "Well, that doesn't mean we can't be friends. Come on, what do you say?"

Jaina hesitated. It felt wrong. But, really, what was the harm in lunch, especially when she had expressed her wish to remain faithful to her wedding vows? Was there any reason they couldn't be just friends?

"I say we need to get going."

Jag looked at the lifeless body of his best friend. He had never in his wildest dreams thought he would actually see this day. Shawnkyr couldn't be gone. She couldn't be dead.

"When have you scheduled the autopsy for?" Jag asked the healer.

"Autopsy?" she frowned.

"You weren't planning to do an autopsy?" he asked, incredulous.

"What's the need? We already know the cause of death."

Jag looked back down at the corpse. He could not shake the feeling that this was more than an accident. For one, Chiss were more accurate with their shots than that. The chance such a precise hit was an accident was almost implausible. The laserbolt that that had killed Shawnkyr had drilled her directly between the shoulder blades. Two, he had learned throughout the years to trust his gut. And right then his gut was telling him that her death had been no accident, but a murder.

"Do the autopsy," Jag ordered at long last. "I want to know the make of the blaster that killed her, along with the power setting and angle of the shot," he commanded.

The doctor saluted crisply, then turned and marched off to prepare for the investigation.

Jag stood over the body of his friend for a few moments longer. He didn't know how he would make it without her. It would be hard, but he would pull through. He had to. He had to find out who had done this to her, and then he would make them pay.

"Thanks for lunch, Payton," Jaina said as she got out of the hovercar.

"Anytime," he smiled.

She smiled back as he drove off. Realizing what was happening, she wanted to slap herself. She had made a promise, and she intended to keep it. she would not let Jag down.

Jag was waiting inside the apartment. "Hey," she said as she took of her jacket and laid her shopping bags down.

"Hey," he replied sullenly.

She sat down on the couch beside him, looking him over. "How did it go?"

"They've scheduled the autopsy."

"That's good, I guess. At least you'll be able to find out who did this to her."

"Yeah," he said unenthusiastically. "How was your friend?"

"She wasn't there. It was her brother, Payton."

"Oh." He stood suddenly. "Well, I'm going to work."

"Today?" she frowned.

"Yeah. I'll see you tonight."

"Okay," Jaina replied.

She continued to sit on the couch after he was gone. She didn't know what was going on with him. She didn't even know what was going on with herself. Finally she decided to call Jacen. He would know what to do.

"Jaina!" he exclaimed as the picture resolved. "How'd you like our little gift?"

"I loved it. It's great, Jace."

He beamed at her praise. "So what's up?"

Jaina ran a tired hand over her face. "A lot that I really wish I didn't have to deal with. Jag and I had become friends, somewhat at least. He says he's even going to help me get into a fighter squadron."

"Hey, that's great Jaina—"

"I'm not finished."

"Sorry."

"It's okay. Last night he came home late, though. His best friend had been shot. We found out this morning that she died during the night."

"That's terrible."

"I know. But he hasn't talked to me since. And…well, Jacen, I'm going to tell you the truth. I met a guy. I really like him, and it's killing me that it can never go anywhere because I am married."

Jacen remained quiet for several heartbeats, studying her intently. "I'm not sure what to tell you, Jaina. You can't have anything with this guy. Like it or not, you're married. The best thing to do is try to make the best of your marriage and stay away from this other guy. Hanging around him will only make things harder on you."

"You're right. As always," Jaina sighed wistfully. "I always knew this would be difficult. I just didn't know it would be this difficult. It doesn't help any that I miss you guys so much."

"We miss you, too, Jaina. More than I can say. But each day that goes by brings you a little closer to home. Hang on to that."

"I will. I love you, Jacen."

"I love you, Jaina."

The alarm went off. Jaina didn't even open her eyes. It was for Jag. The mattress shifted as he got up and turned off the ringing chrono. She heard his quiet footsteps retreat into the refresher.

He had been pouring over his work nonstop for days, even when he was at home. He got up early and came home late, and spoke less than ten words to her a day. She didn't think it was a slight, per say, but more like he was just too distracted. His mind was elsewhere most of the time, that she could tell.

Unable to stop her whirring thoughts, she reluctantly threw off the covers and got up. Jag was still in the shower, so she ordered breakfast. It arrived just as he finished.

"What's this?" he asked.

"Breakfast," she said as cheerfully as possible. "Hungry?"

"Not really," he said. "Thanks anyway, but I think I'm going on to work, okay?"

"No," Jaina said.

"What?"

"I said no; it's not okay. Sit down."

He looked at her as if she had just swallowed a bantha. Very slowly he sat down. "What is this all about, Jaina?"

"This is about why you're treating me like Shawnkyr's death was my fault. I thought we had actually been getting along. Why are you doing this?"

He just looked at her. And then he looked away. "I don't know. That's not how I feel. I've just thrown myself into my work. It's easier to forget about it that way. I'm not trying to alienate you. I just…I don't want to deal with this whole marriage thing right now."

Jaina nodded, understanding. "And that's okay. Just tell me that so I'm not wondering what happened, all right?"

He smiled slightly. "All right."

Jag knocked on the door, again. "Just a second!" she yelled for the umpteenth time.

"We only have five more minutes!" he yelled back.

She sighed. Yes, she had been locked in the bedroom for the past three hours, but that was no reason fro him to ask if she was ready every five minutes. "You've been saying that for an hour."

"Okay, so we're an hour late. Come on Jaina, how long could this take?"

Jaina chose to ignore the question. She looked in the mirror one last time. It had taken her one of the three hours to decide what to do with her hair. She had at long last settled on leaving it the way it was, down and straight.

Then it took another hour to get the dress to fit right and choose the right combination of jewelry. The last was spent on makeup. She wasn't even sure why she tried, and stopped to ponder that n itself several times.

Deciding there wasn't much more she could do to delay, she opened the bedroom door. Jag stood outside his back to her. For a moment she let herself forget the circumstances and just admired the way he looked in that tux, the way it accentuated his broad shoulders and narrow waist. And then she was back to reality, and he was just Jag again.

He turned around, and then just froze that way. Quickly regaining his composure, he cleared his throat. "What?" Jaina asked, wondered what was wrong with him. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he said, still staring at the dress. "Trust me, nothing. I'm just glad you're ready."

Jaina nodded, a little disappointed and not sure why. He hurried her into her coat and out the door, and soon they were on their way to the docking bay.

"So, how long is this little extravaganza supposed to last?" she asked on the ride there.

"Several hours, at least. It goes by faster than you would think, though, so don't worry."

Jaina laughed.

"What?" he smirked.

"I wasn't worrying, Jag. Boy, you all sure dislike this an awful lot to make such a fuss over it."

Jag fiddled with his tie. "We believe in recognizing valor and bravery, even though we dislike the pageantry."

Jaina sighed and moved his struggling hands away from tie and began to fix it herself. "And we believe that when something good happens you should celebrate. Make the best of those moments because they are so rare."

When she looked up she found his too close green eyes staring back at her, and a sudden chill ran down her spine. She withdrew her hands quickly and folded them in her lap, staring at the back of the seat in front of her. The air was punctuated by silence until they reached the port.

Jaina watched Csilla shrink beneath them and the shuttle. It was the first time she had been offworld since she first arrived, and the experience was invigorating. Even though its snow-capped peaks and icy plains were beautiful, she ached to see the glowing megalopolis of Coruscant in the viewport.

The General's flagship was of a design completely unfamiliar to Jaina, as most of the Chiss ships were. It was as large as a Victory-class Star Destroyer, but far more elegant in appearance. The inside however was much the same: streamlined and efficient.

They were led to a Grand Reception Hall, where there were more Chiss gathered together in one place than she had seen on Csilla yet. Most were in military dress uniform, but a few were in civilian garb.

Such as Syal Antilles.

She was decked out in an graceful but eye-catchingly stunning gown and stood out in the blue-skinned crowd like a Hutt at a Wookiee family reunion. Her smile grew even broader as she saw Jaina and Jag coming. "Jaina, you look lovely," she beamed.

"Thank you, so do you," Jaina replied.

"Jag," she said, turning to her son, "You look so handsome. You know how to make a mother proud."

Jag bent to kiss his mother's upturned cheek. "And you're beautiful as always. Where is Father?"

Syal nodded to a knot of males across the room. "Go ahead," she urged. Then taking Jaina by the arm she said, "Jaina can stay and talk to me." Jag bowed slightly to the pair and then went off in the indicated direction.

"Now," Syal said, leading Jaina towards an unoccupied table, "tell me how things have been since poor Shawnkyr's death."

Jaina sat before replying. "Better than they were. I get the feeling that he's always thinking about something else, though."

Syal nodded thoughtfully. "He's probably figuring out some way to prove that she was murdered. He never was good at letting go. When my poor Davin died…" the older woman trailed off, as if unable to finish the thought. "Well. Jag is strong. He'll recover soon enough."

"So where is Cem this eveni—"

"Shh!" Syal hissed, cutting her off hurriedly. "Do not speak of him in public."

"Why not?"

Syal looked nervous. "I'll explain it to you some other time."

"Okay," Jaina said reluctantly.

Suddenly all the people began to move to the tables to eat. Jag and the Baron returned and took seats beside Jaina and Syal. The food was brought out quickly. Even though the taste was not entirely unpleasant, Jaina had a hard time with the foreign flavor. She ate as much as she could to be polite, but only just enough. When most everyone had struck up conversation again after they were finished the General decided to make his announcements.

When he stepped behind the podium the first thought to enter Jaina's mind was that he was not to be trusted. She tried to shake it off, but it persisted, even as he spoke she probed him with the Force. She found his mind confusing and almost completely unreadable. It was terribly frustrating. At the look of concentration on her face Jag asked her what was wrong.

Jaina waved off his concern. "Just the Force. Something about him is just not right…"

"What do you mean, 'not right'?" Jag pressed.

Jaina shrugged. "I haven't figured it out yet."

He gave her a skeptical look but said nothing more on the subject.

After he was done people began to mingle about a bit. Jaina remained seated, more comfortable out of sight. Suddenly Jag stood, and gestured for her to do likewise. "Why?" she asked.

"Just come with me," he smiled slightly.

A little curious, she took his proffered hand and let him lead her away. He led her through several hallways before finally coming to a set off doors. Jaina thought she heard the drone of music behind them. "What's this?" she asked.

"This," he grinned ruefully, "is where humans go after such festivities."

"Humans? I thought you were the only ones."

"Not in the whole military, no. There are hundreds. And they can be…different."

"How different?" Jaina asked, feeling suddenly adventurous.

"Quite different. Take a look for yourself." He then opened one of the doors just wide enough for the two of them to slide through then shut it quickly. Inside was something Jaina never thought she would see anywhere in Chiss space. It was full of young Chiss men and women, all laughing and having a good time. There were several sabaac tables, a dejarik board, and some low tech simulators without hoods or pods, just the screen and controls.

"Wow," Jaina said. "Definitely not what I expected."

"I thought you would like it."

They milled about for a while, trying to blend in as best as possible. Soon Jag became embroiled in a simulated podracing match, and Jaina was left to her own devices. Feeling oddly liberated, she cast her lot in a sabaac table. She had played several times against her Uncle Lando, and he was a 'professional'. She knew the ropes of the game, and also knew that she had to have inherited some of her father's infamous luck.

Before long she had compiled such an amount that most people had stopped what they were doing to observe the game. It came down to her and another young woman hailing from Nal Hutta. In the end Jaina won the game by quite a slim margin. She turned down the credits, though, giving them back to her opponent. What did she need them for?

When it was over she found Jag in the crowd. He was grinning broadly. "Who taught you to play sabaac?" he asked.

"My Uncle Lando Calrissian. Impressed?" she smirked.

"Maybe," he said with just the right tinge of sarcasm. "So. Ready to turn in?"

Jaina shook her head. She looked around the room, looking for one last dance before she left.

Dance.

She slowly turned to look back at Jag, her smile mischievous and playful. "Dance with me."

His brow furrowed and he looked around, as if for an out. "I don't really think that's such a good idea."

"Oh, come on, what are you afraid of?" she joked. "Just one dance and I'll never ask you again." He still looked skeptical. She sighed. "It'll be fun, and you know it."

Jag shrugged reluctantly and let her drag him out onto the floor with the others. Jaina enjoyed his nervousness immensely as she wrapped her arms humorously around him. Then she noted with less amusement the queasy feeling in her stomach as she felt his hand come to rest on the small of her back. She could feel the tenseness of his muscles even through the jacket, and it sent another set of chills down her back. And boy, he smelled really good…

Oh no. Was she falling for him?

She tensed immediately, her thoughts a jumbled mass of panicking emotions. She jumped back away from him, flustered beyond compare. He gave her a concerned look, but before he could speak she said, "I'll be right back."

She turned and ran, and finally found refuge in the public 'fresher. She went in, checked for other occupants, and locked the door. Despairing, she leaned against the wall and let herself sink to the floor. She drew her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them protectively. This couldn't be happening. No, no, she couldn't feel that way.

Could she?

She drew her hands up to her mouth in shock. She didn't know what to do. What was she to do? How could she have let this happen? When had it happened? And what did it all mean?

She didn't want to know any of it. She wanted to go home. She didn't want to deal with Jag, or the Fels, or the Chiss. She wanted Jacen more than ever. So she reached out it the Force and touched him through their twin bond, calling him to her rescue. His response was like a giant question mark. What was wrong? She poured her anxiety and frustration into the bond, and he responded with comfort and soothing thoughts. She let herself drown in his calming aura, and after a few minutes was a little more rational. She cut the connection grudgingly and stood. She would just pretend that nothing had changed. Everything was exactly as it had been minutes before.

She left the refresher and went in search of Jag through the crowd. When she found him he was not alone. A Chiss officer was conferring softly with him, and then the alien handed him a set of papers. He saluted crisply and left. "What was that?" Jaina asked.

Jag gave her a pained look. "I have to go."

"Where?"

"To war."

Jaina was taken aback. "Now?"

"This minute. The General made an announcement. I can't even go back to Csilla. We're deporting immediately."

Jaina took a step back. "When will you be coming home?"

He shook his head sadly. "I can't answer that."

She wanted to cry and vomit and scream all at the same time. Why did this all have to happen to her? "Be…" she stammered, cutting of her tear ducts to keep the revealing liquid at bay, "be careful, okay?"

He nodded and smiled softly. "I will."

She then let her decorous pretense fall, and hugged him fiercely. He returned her embrace softly. "You better come back."

He gave her no answer.