Darkwing Duck: Prince of Thieves
Act X
Negaduck and Darkwing were evenly matched. The entire fight had been a near thing, but finally, one fighter gained the upper hand, and was currently using it to his full advantage.
"You- urgh- you might as well- ack!- give up, Negaduck!" said Darkwing.
"Brave words for someone who's gonna be pushing up daisies in about thirty seconds," said Negaduck smugly. He had Darkwing pinned to the ground, with his hands around the goody-two-shoes's throat. This was one of those moments that dreams were made of. He was actually getting a little bit giddy. Well, he would have been if he were anyone but Negaduck. "You never stop trying, I'll give you that. Let's see, I could just choke you to death... But, ah, the lack of blood! Or maybe... First, I'll strangle you, then I'll stab you, then I'll hang you, then I'll... tattoo you..."
Darkwing was starting to find it hard to breathe. "How about you let him go?" he said, in a high-pitched voice out of the side of his mouth.
"NO!!" yelled Negaduck, tightening his hands. "Speak your last peace!"
As Darkwing started to lose consciousness, he decided that it was now or never and used all of his remaining strength to bring his legs upward and flip Negaduck off of him. He had more strength left in him than he knew, and Negaduck ended up hitting the wall behind him. Darkwing stood up and looked at his adversary. Negaduck had been stunned, and was looking a little woozy. "Had enough, Negs?" asked Darkwing, trying to sound more assertive than he felt.
"Ha...!" said Negaduck, who was sounding just as hazy as Darkwing felt. "Enough of what? Your... acrobat games?" He got to his feet, wavering a little.
One good kick, thought Darkwing, and he'll be out of commission. He decided not to acknowledge the fact that he was just as close to being knocked out of the game. He prepared himself to launch a web-kick to Negaduck's face, but at the same moment, Negaduck charged at him again. Darkwing and Negaduck rammed into each other head on, and by sheer luck, Darkwing was the one who made it through the impact conscious.
He shook his head and looked at Negaduck, whom he was sitting on. "Heh... How's that for acrobatics, Negs?" he said aloud, grinning. He looked around the room, and noted with some surprise that the fight was over, and the Fearsome Five had been defeated without his help. Oh, well. First time for everything, he figured.
"Darkwing!" cried Gosalyn, seeing that the fight had ended. She ran over to him. "Are you okay?"
"Yep, yep, yep... Darkwing Duck defeats the denizens of delinquency yet again!" said Darkwing. Gosalyn hugged him, and he smiled and put his arms around her warmly. Elizabeth and Launchpad were already hugging, and then Elizabeth turned to her parents.
"Father... Mother!" She ran to them and hugged each one in turn. "This is Launchpad," she said, pointing to him. Launchpad waved shyly. "He's... a wonderful person." Launchpad blushed.
Binkie beamed. "Why, dear, that's wonderful!"
Herb nodded. "It certainly is! But I'm afraid he's still broken the law. GUARDS!"
The two palace guards who were still conscious stood at attention. Mike reluctantly joined them a moment later. Elizabeth was shocked, and Launchpad looked downright alarmed. Binkie sighed, and gave her husband a stern look. "Herb... They did save us, and our daughter..."
"Well... that's true," said the King. The guards started to wander away. Herb looked cross. "Wait! I have not dismissed you! You will still carry out my orders!" The guards looked at each other, and shrugged. Elizabeth and Launchpad looked across the room to Darkwing and Gosalyn, and all four silently prepared to escape if need be. Herb cleared his throat and announced, "I have a sudden appetite for fish and chips. Bring me some, and put it on the Royal Tab." Everyone in the room seemed to heave a sigh of relief as one of the guards left to get the King some takeout food. "As for you," he addressed the thieves, "anyone who saves my daughter has my eternal gratitude. No hard feelin's, spuds!" He chuckled. Elizabeth hugged him happily.
"Do you approve of Launchpad, then?" she asked hopefully.
"Oh, I certainly do!" Binkie chirped. "He seems brave, and he's quite handsome!"
"Aw, shucks," said Launchpad, blushing even more.
Elizabeth blushed, as well. "Mo-ther..."
"Well," said Herb thoughtfully, "I guess so." Suddenly, he caught sight of a small red piece of thread tied to his finger. Elizabeth saw it at the same time, and grabbed his hand and held it in both of her own, smiling widely. Her diversionary tactic failed, though. "Just so long as you don't get married," Herb said pleasantly. Elizabeth wilted.
Launchpad looked confused. "Huh? Why not? Does she have to marry royalty or somethin'? 'Cause, uh--"
With a laugh, Herb said, "No, no, nothing of the sort! She's simply forbidden to get married. When she was young I decided she'd never marry anyone."
Elizabeth put her hand to her forehead. "I always thought that was the silliest rule," she mumbled.
"Don't undermine your father, dear," whispered Binkie.
Darkwing approached the crowd, with Gosalyn at his side. "Excuse me, Your Majesty, but why did you invent such a rule? It seems kind of useless, if you don't mind my saying so."
"Well, spud, it's funny you should ask that, 'cause darned if I forgot years ago!" Herb laughed again. "But why I did it doesn't matter, 'cause if I decided on something so important, it must've been for a good reason!"
"Does it have anything to do with my dad?" asked Launchpad.
"Your dad?" asked Elizabeth, confused.
"Yeah! Ripcord McQuack. Y'know, the King of Duckbergia. When I was a kid, he and the King of Santa Canardia got in a fight, and Dad ended up getting banished from- what's the matter?"
Elizabeth was agape. "You- your father is-?"
"Yeah. I thought you knew!"
Darkwing stared at her. "You didn't recognize the name McQuack?"
"We never talk about it here, because Father-"
She was cut off by the sound of the King grinding his teeth together. "You..." he rumbled, pointing at Launchpad. Launchpad gulped. Elizabeth cringed behind him. Darkwing prepared himself to come to his sidekick's aid. "You... How dare you set foot in my kingdom!?"
"Uh... Sorry..." Launchpad took a step backwards.
"Get out!"
"But Father-" Elizabeth tried to protest.
"Out, before I have you arrested!"
"If you're going to arrest him, you can arrest me too!" cried Elizabeth. Herb froze. "Come on, this is something between you and Launchpad's father, not you and Launchpad! If anything, you should be thanking Launchpad for breaking that rule! He saved your castle, and you, and me, several times over!" The King was contemplating her words. "And I love him, and I'm not going to let you do anything to him," she added, looking at Launchpad as she said it. He smiled, took her hand and squeezed it.
Herb sighed. "My daughter and the son of my most hated enemy, in love," he said. "Why does this have to be so hard?"
Launchpad spoke up, a tremor in his voice. "Would it help if I replaced the cheese curls?"
Darkwing, Gosalyn, Mike, and Elizabeth all exclaimed, "Cheese curls?!"
"Yeah. That's what the fight was about... My dad ate all of your dad's cheese curls at a party," said Launchpad. Elizabeth looked exasperated. Darkwing looked disgusted. Gosalyn started snickering to herself. Even Mike looked a little bit fed up.
"Now I remember! They were good cheese curls..." whined Herb. "I... I don't know..."
The door to the throne room opened. "Your Majesty, here's your fish and chips combo," said the guard.
Herb's eyes lit up. "All right, young McQuack. You prove that you have the honor that your father lacked. I forgive you!" With that he rushed to his food and started eating.
"So... I can marry your daughter?" Launchpad said hopefully. Mike glared at him, and Ray patted his shoulder sympathetically.
"No, that rule still stands," said Herb with his mouth full. Mike chuckled softly.
Darkwing spoke up. "But-"
Elizabeth shook her head. "Don't argue. It's a start. Besides, I'm in no hurry to settle down. I was getting used to being part of your group... I think I'd like to try being a Warrior Princess for a while." She smiled at Launchpad, and put her arm around him. He looked surprised by her forwardness, then grinned and pulled her close for a kiss.
"Ew! P.D.A!" said Gosalyn, sticking her tongue out in disgust.
Mike grunted and turned away. "This is getting sick," he said sourly. "I'm going outside."
"One moment!" called the King. Mike's heart nearly stopped beating. The King was addressing him! This could be it! This could be the moment he was waiting for! He turned, and bowed nervously.
"Y-yes, Your Majesty?"
"You have served me well, young man," said Herb. He wiped his hands on his robes, and went on. "You're a Junior Guard, are you not?"
"Yes. I mean, yes, Your Majesty." Oh, this was going well so far...
"For your bravery, young guard, you deserve a promotion." Mike beamed and vowed to remember this moment for the rest of his life. "I now declare you Captain of the Junior Palace Guards!"
Mike had to fight to keep the smile on his face. "Th-thank you, Your Majesty," he managed. It certainly hadn't been what he was expecting... Prior to this, the Junior Palace Guard had had no ranks, although he had considered himself the leader, anyway. So in effect, this meant nothing. But, well, it wasn't so bad. It was certainly a start. In fact, this left him a lot of room for growth! With a genuine smile, he said, "Thank you very much!"
The King smiled graciously and turned to Ray, who was keeping an eye on the Fearsome Five. "Your actions are also appreciated, young man! You are now second-in-command of the Junior Palace Guards!"
Ray looked up, surprised. "Uh... Thanks," he said. The King nodded, and left. "Does he remember who I am?" Ray asked Mike.
"Probably not," Mike grinned. "Be grateful. I think you'll make a great Junior Guard."
"Feh," said Ray. "I'm a top-notch thief! Why would I want to be second-in-command of the Junior Palace Guards?" He grinned when Mike looked disappointed. "I'll have your job in a week."
"In your dreams," countered Mike competitively, but jovially. He was glad Ray was going to stay. Having a new friend, other than Elizabeth, would help a lot.
Darkwing looked down at Gosalyn, who was asking him for every detail of his escape from certain death and capture earlier. She didn't seem to believe him when he told her the short version, but he was too tired at the moment to come up with a better story. One thing he did realize, however, was how much he'd miss her if he moved on in his travels without her. "Say Gos," he interrupted her. She flashed him an annoyed look, but fell silent. "Are you up for travel?"
"Travel? How do you mean?"
"Well, if you were, to, say, live more in a camp, and wander from kingdom to kingdom a bit, then, would you mind that kind of life?"
"Would I mind? No way! That's the kind of life I've always wanted- Wait. Are you asking me if I want to... join you?" He nodded. "Keen gear!" she cried, and leapt onto him, strangling him with a tremendous hug.
"I take it that's a 'yes'," he choked.
"You bet! But I thought you said that I couldn't join until I was older?" she asked, loosening the hug.
"Well, you wouldn't really be a part of the band yet, exactly. Let's just call it... 'training'." She grinned, and he hugged her.
Elizabeth looked around. Everyone was having a happy ending, and it was great. She tightened her arms around Launchpad, loving the way that he smiled down at her. She noticed Bo standing in the corner, and saw that he was talking to Terry. She couldn't recall when she'd met Terry, or how she knew her name. And when she thought of it, she couldn't quite remember when Terry had gotten here, either. The memory was strangely elusive, and kept sliding through her mind's grasp before she could grab hold of it. Still, seeing Terry and Bo together was nice. She waved at them, and they waved back.
A moment later, she noticed that the Fearsome Five were gone. "Launchpad, where did we move the Fearsome Five?" she asked, a little bit warily.
"The roof," he said casually. "Remember? So that they couldn't dig their way out."
This explanation was vaguely dissatisfying to Elizabeth, though she couldn't say why. It made sense... didn't it?
"Vell," said an Austrian-accented voice, "the roof is obviously another term for the desires you have been repressing. If you let yourself feel them, and eat the poundcake, you vill be fine." Elizabeth turned around to find Sigduck Freud standing behind her. He took a puff on his cigar significantly.
Elizabeth was confused. "Um..."
Ted ran across the room to where Freud was standing. "Wow! Long time no see! How's it goin', Freud-dude?"
"Have ve met?" asked Freud politely.
Ted was about to answer, when a flash of light and a loud rushing sound filled the air. The room got dark, and a wind picked up. "Excellent!" cried Ted, barely audible over the noise.
The Queen screamed and fainted. Launchpad tightened his arms around Elizabeth's shoulders as ... something descended into the throne room. It appeared to be a tall, metallic box, certainly large enough to fit several people into. As the onlookers watched, the front of the box folded itself open, and a man stepped out, dressed in very strange clothing.
"Ted! Everything all right, I trust? Sorry it took us so long to pick you up, but we had a little trouble with the booth. The months in between when we lost you and right now are out of order at the moment," said the man.
Ted smiled. "Most triumphant entrance, Rufus!"
"I know, but hurry up! Time's still passing in San Dimas, you know!" said Rufus. He checked his watch. "You have a concert in a half an hour, and you haven't picked up a guitar in almost five months."
"Bogus," said Ted softly. "Oh well. Catch ya later, guys!" He rushed into the booth next to Rufus, and they slid the door shut. The wind and noises began again, and with another flash of light, the time-traveling phone booth disappeared into thin air...
"Uh?" said Beth groggily as the image of the phone booth faded from her head. "Geez... what did I eat last night to give me a dream like that?" she asked herself. Her head seemed lower than it normally did when she woke up. She opened her eyes halfway. The pillow was on the floor, that was the reason.
It couldn't be seven o'clock yet, could it? She found the clock and brought it close to her face, squinting to read it. It was. She groaned and dragged herself out of bed. "Weird dream," she said as she shuffled towards the bathroom. "That's the last time I read Freud before going to bed, though... Ha!" she gave way to a sudden burst of laughter as she remembered what he had said in her dream: something about eating poundcake. Freud never said stuff like that. His diagnoses were all related to... Well, never mind.
Repressing desires to eat poundcake... That was ridiculous. She could eat all the poundcake she wanted! If she liked it. Which she didn't, actually. She looked at her reflection in the mirror and stuck her tongue out at it. Too bad the dream had deteriorated like that; she would have been interested to see what was going to happen with her and Launchpad after-
Wait a minute.
"Launchpad?" whispered Beth thoughtfully.
Next: Identity Crisis!
A/N: I'm sorry this took so long to put up. I've been very busy at work lately. Meanwhile this story has so many references and oddities to it that I have to explain a few things.
First of all, if you're at all familiar with pop culture you'll recognize at least a few of the references to "Star Wars". There are TONS. I love the original trilogy so much. :) I also intentionally based "Princess" Beth on Leia, and her interactions with Launchpad a little bit on Han/Leia. I wanted to make LP like Han but I just couldn't; he's too nice a guy! So I kind of made him a little like him, but different.
Second of all, all the new characters. A lot of them are named after friends of mine, although none are actually based on them character-wise. Mike, Terry, Bo, are all good friends of mine while a few more just get name-dropped. (I needed a supporting cast.) The other original characters are mostly either direct references to, or else inspired by, other media: Ted is from "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure", and if you didn't get that, that's where the bit at the end comes from too; Harry is a sort of Clint Eastwood character, part Dirty Harry, part Man With No Name. Anybody who has ever seen "Ranma 1/2" will probably recognize that Ray is based HEAVILY on Ryouga Hibiki. At first he was just going to be a walk-on character but the story got away from me and Ray became a very important character! I guess it's because I love Ryouga so very very much; I had to give him a big role.
Thirdly, I want to list the references that this story makes to various other movies, TV series, books, and so forth. But I can't, because there are so many that I CAN'T REMEMBER THEM ALL. Someday I will.
And fourth, although I originally intended this story as just an AU with no place in continuity of my series, a prereader read it when it was nearly done and said "Now I'll guess the ending. Beth is going to wake up and see Launchpad in a new light, right?" and I hadn't intended that at all, but I realized he was right. That was EXACTLY what was going to happen. So here you have it. :) Things start to pick up from here on out, bwahahaha! ...Yeah. Thanks for reading!
© 1995, 1997 by R. Littlehales. All Darkwing characters are owned by Disney and were used without permission; all other characters created and owned by R. Littlehales. This story may be distributed as long as the author is given credit, and no profit is made from it. This author may be credited as long as the profit is given distribution. All events in this story are true, but were changed to protect the innocent and are now so different from the way they originally were that they are worthy of being a Disney feature. :)