Marissa's reply

"No not no. I mean yes, I'll marry you. No … you're not rushing things." Marissa added quickly, realising that he had misinterpreted what she'd said.

"Really?" He smiled almost scared to believe what she was saying.

"Really." She lent in and proceeded to kiss him with all the love she possessed, leaving him in no doubt.

He pulled back gasping for air and wiped the tears from her face. He laughed. "I bet you always imagined this would be more romantic."

"It feels pretty romantic to me. I imagined it with you. That's all that matters. And it is romantic to bring me to where we first met to propose." She replied.

"Even if it's on a driveway?" Ryan smiled.

"Uh huh. It's a special driveway. Not any driveway would have done." Marissa felt like her heart would burst.

Ryan smiled. He felt like he was flying. "Okay….then. Future Mrs Atwood. Are you ready to go inside?"

"Not really but I guess the sooner we do, the sooner we can go home and celebrate our engagement." She suggested.

"Mmmm. How do you suggest we celebrate?" Ryan asked. Then all of a sudden something flashed into this brain. "Uhoh" Ryan looked panic stricken.

"What?" Marissa asked wondering what was wrong. Had he changed his mind or something?

"Seth?"

"What about Seth" she asked.

"Um…I sort of promised him that I wouldn't get engaged before he got around to asking Summer. I mean everyone knows they will get married, he's even had the ring for a couple of months now but he has been trying to come up with some grand romantic gesture and he will ask her then. I think he might kill me if we go in there and tell them our news."

Marissa smiled. "Well, why don't we just keep it to ourselves until Seth does the deed. Hopefully it won't be too far away. Maybe we can even give him some ideas."

"You'd do that?" Ryan smiled at her. Loving the fact that she was prepared to put Seth and Summer's happiness before her own.

"If the alternative is that my fiancé could be killed by his brother then definitely yes." As soon as she said it, Marissa was reminded of Trey and wished she could take back the words. She felt the colour drain from her face.

Ryan obviously hadn't made the connection thank goodness. He thought her sudden change of tone was because she knew she was about to see Julie again. "Okay" he leant in and kissed her again. "It'll be our secret... at least for now. But soon… very soon...I want the world to know."

They got out of the car and Ryan took her hand and they made it to the front door. He could see how nervous Marissa was. "You don't have to worry. I asked Kirsten to make Julie wait in the pool house. You don't have to talk to her until you're ready."

Marissa looked at him and realised that he really was trying to make this as easy as possible for her. She closed the gap and kissed him. "Thank you."

Ryan smiled and rang the door bell. While they were waiting for someone to answer it he squeezed her hand and smiled at her. "We'll get through this together."

Marissa nodded trying to convince herself that he was right.

Sandy opened the door. "Marissa, Ryan. Come on through. Everyone is in the kitchen."

Marissa pulled back realising she was not ready to see her mother.

Sandy noticed and added. "Sorry, not Julie. She's in the pool house. Everyone ELSE is in the kitchen." He smiled trying to give Marissa some reassurance.

She tried to smile but felt it was more of a grimace. Even though Julie was in the pool house Marissa knew she was getting closer. She began to feel nauseous as the anxiety turned to knots in her stomach. She got to the door of the kitchen and was immediately engulfed in a hug from Summer.

"Coop. Thank goodness you're here. I've been waiting to see what you got from Chino on Friday." She grabbed Marissa's hand to inspect the ring. "Oh my god…. It's beautiful. I can't believe you didn't drop by and show me…. obviously you were too busy 'thanking him'." Summer said, using her fingers as quotes to tease Marissa. She had obviously forgotten where she was.

Marissa could feel herself blush bright red at Summer's words. She remembered exactly how she had been 'thanking' Ryan on Friday night, starting with the session in the lift on the way home and she felt herself burning up. She looked at him and realised that he was a bit flushed as well but when their eyes met he smiled and then started to chuckle as he looked at the other eyes in the room all watching them. He took Marissa in his arms, and as he started to laugh, they all joined in. Marissa couldn't believe that she was standing in her future parents-in-law's kitchen with everyone she held dear and they were all thinking about….she didn't know exactly what they were all thinking, but suffice to say she doubted it was G rated. She buried her head in to Ryan's shoulder not wanting to make eye contact with anyone but him and mumbled to Summer "I can't believe you said that."

"Oops. Maybe I forgot where we were." She shrugged. "But does it really matter. We all know what you two have been up to. You can't go the blushing virgin on us now."

"Summer…do you mind?" Marissa exclaimed.

"No not at all. But obviously you do." She replied. Marissa glared at Seth who instantly tried to stop laughing. Seeing her discomfit, he was doing everything in his power to not join in but it was killing him.

"Don't look at me. I have no control over her." He laughed as soon as he opened his mouth. "And as for Ryan" Seth looked at Ryan figuring he could take some of the heat off Marissa by giving his brother a hard time. "Well… we all know what he's like. Or at least what he's been like since you came back. Before then he had such a drought to make up for, it's surprising he has even let you come up for air."

Marissa thought back to her activities that morning and could have died of embarrassment. Surely now everyone would know what she had been doing to Ryan under the sheets.

Seth's good intentions seemed to have backfired as he noticed Marissa turning even redder, she had obviously spent quite a bit of time 'down under' and he didn't mean Australia. Plus now Ryan was glaring at him too. What could he do? He thought quickly. "But of course what chance did he have when he has mum and dad around all the time as role models. You know what they are like. Can't keep their hands to themselves."

Sandy laughed. "As I've told you before son…Your mum's a hottie and I've got her." He said as he pulled Kirsten into a tight hug.

Summer realised that she and Seth were the only two not in a hug. "Cohen?"

"What?" he turned to her.

"Come here. I don't want to be the only one missing out." Summer pouted as Seth moved over to her.

"My little sugar plum… I promise you'll never miss out." He said as he made his way around the kitchen to give her a hug. As he reached her Seth took her in his arms and then turned and looked at the other two couples. "I'm feeling that the Fantastic Four may have just become the Super Six. I think that mum and dad can be honorary members since they have been such wonderful role models."

Sandy smiled. "I'm sure we're truly honoured Seth."

"You do realise that I'm talking about, as far as, showing us how to get it on." Seth added.

Kirsten looked horrified. "Seth. I think you have gone far enough."

"What? Are you saying mother that a hug is all I'm allowed in the kitchen. I've caught you two going a hell of a lot further." He smiled teasing them both.

"Seth. You really should stop now before you get disinherited." Kirsten added and then turned her back on him to prove that as far as she was concerned that topic was over. "Now Marissa, may I have a look at your ring please?" she glared at Seth as she moved over and raised Marissa's hand to get a better look. "It really is lovely." She looked at Marissa. "I gather this is the ring that they mentioned in the paper this morning. Your mother said she didn't remember you ever having one like it." As soon as she said it, Kirsten realised that she had broken the mood of the room. For a couple of minutes they had managed to put the thought of Julie out of their minds and had just all enjoyed being together. But the magic was now broken. Kirsten wished she could take back her words.

"The paper?" Ryan asked, wanting to break the silence that had engulfed the room since Julie's name had been mentioned.

"Um yes…page 3, I think." Kirsten added as Ryan pulled Marissa over to the table to look at the paper lying there.

He glanced down at the photos and then smiled as he read the heading. 'ARE THEY LOOKING TO MAKE IT PERMANENT?' He glanced at Marissa to make sure that she was reading it as well. His smile met hers as they silently thought about their secret. "Those paparazzi are pretty clever. Aren't they?" Ryan said looking at Marissa. She smiled knowing exactly what he was talking about.

"I don't know about clever?" Sandy said. "Since when do you need to be clever to take a couple of photos of you two walking around a mall. It doesn't look like you were trying to hide or anything."

"Maybe you're right." Ryan smiled and pulled Marissa back into his arms.

"So…" he looked at Marissa and held her tightly knowing that she needed him to help her get through this. He could feel her start to tremble slightly as he held her and he was pretty sure that it was nothing to do with their connection but all to do with her mother. "How do you want to do this?"

---

Marissa looked at Ryan and he could see that she was barely holding on. All the humour of a minute ago had been lost. She started to shake her head.

"If you'd like, I'll be your right hand man… or woman?" Summer stated. "I guess Ryan could be the man." She was trying to let Marissa know that she was there to lend her support. "You know, like if you're going off in to battle and you need someone beside you."

"I think that's called a second." Seth said.

"Yeah. That's it." She looked back at Marissa trying to reassure her. "Or if you want Ryan as your second, then I'll be your third." Summer added.

Marissa looked at Summer and tried to smile to convey her thanks. She could feel the tears welling in her eyes and she didn't know how she was going to manage.

Ryan looked at them all as he held Marissa tightly to him. He could feel her slender body trembling beneath his hands. "Maybe you could just give us a moment alone. If you don't mind?" he asked.

"Sure. We'll be in the lounge room." Sandy said and started to herd them all in before him. He got to the door and turned. "Marissa. Just so you know. We are all here for you. What ever you want to do is fine by us." She nodded and he turned and followed the others from the room.

"So." Ryan tilted her head and kissed her lovingly. "What's going through that head of yours?"

"I don't think I can do this." She looked at him the tears starting to escape her eyes.

"But Ris. Didn't we go through this at home? If you want I can come with you? Julie can't do anything to us anymore."

"No Ryan." She shook her head. "I can't do it… I'm sorry…. You know I didn't want to have anything to do with her in the first place. But I could see that you wanted me to, so I thought I'd try… just for you… but… I just can't."

"But I'll be right there with you. This might be the only chance you have…"

"Don't you understand? I don't want a chance." Marissa said raising her voice to try to make Ryan understand. "You may have been prepared to give her a go but I don't want to and as Sandy said I certainly don't have to. You say that we were both hurt. But I don't think you really realise what I went through."

"Ris. We were both broken hearted. There's no question about that." Ryan stated.

"Yeah. But let me tell you, what I went through and what you went through were vastly different." She looked him in the eyes trying to make him understand. "You had all those people in there supporting you." She indicated the lounge room. "They're wonderful people and they love you. Even Summer. If you needed someone to talk to…and before you say anything…I know you …you probably didn't talk to anyone. But still, you knew if you wanted to, that any one of them would have been there for you. They would have understood and helped you and done anything they could to help you feel better and get over me. I don't care how you were feeling you always knew that they were always going to be there for you. That's because they love you. You never had to question that. They were like your safety net."

Ryan looked towards the lounge room starting to realise just how much different it had been for Marissa. He went to reach for Marissa but she pushed his hands away.

"But...I…HAD...NO…ONE." Marissa's voice was getting louder and louder as she tried to get her message through. "NO… ONE. The only person I had was… her." She motioned towards the pool house as she spat out the word. "I was in a different country with no friends, and because of her I thought that you had replaced me in your life with someone you liked more…… I was devastated…broken. The only person I had to talk to was her and I knew I couldn't do that because all she did was tell me how much better off I was without you. And I knew that wasn't the case. I knew that I would never find anyone else that I could love, like I loved you. So I had to try to come to terms with the fact that I would have to spend my life without you…."

"But Ris.." Ryan tried to interrupt.

But Marissa was almost hysterical by this point. "I even contemplated suicide, I was so alone… it seemed liked the easiest way out." Marissa looked back at Ryan hoping he could see just how hard it had been.

Ryan felt like he had been slapped. He had no idea just how hard Marissa had taken it. He thought back to what he was like. The partying, the sleeping around. Definitely not his finest hour, but she was right. Even though they couldn't help much, he had always known that Seth and Summer and Sandy and Kirsten would have done anything for him, if he had thought that it would help. He would have only had to ask.

Marissa looked at him and started to speak again. "And the whole reason for that was because of her lies. How can she call herself a mother if she could do that to me? And then to watch me as I went through years of depression, all because of her. She had it in her power to cure my depression. It only existed because of her lies. And she chose not to." Marissa was so angry. She knew the anger was at her mother but the fact was, Ryan was right in front of her and he was trying to make her face Julie. And that made Marissa lash out at him. "I hate her for what she has done. And I can never forgive her."

"I'm not asking you to forgive her but maybe if you just give her a chance to explain…"

"Don't you understand? I can't." Marissa yelled at him.

"Can't or won't?" Ryan asked. He realised that she had been through a much tougher time than he had, but he still thought that she should at least talk to her mother. She had to deal with it sometime.

"Ryan it doesn't really matter because I'm not doing it." Marissa gritted her teeth. "I hate her for what she has done. As far as I'm concerned she can go and rot in hell. Because that is what she put me through." Marissa was almost screaming by this point. She started to move through the kitchen headed for the front door. She turned and yelled back at him "As far as I'm concerned MY MOTHER IS DEAD."

Ryan stood stunned for a moment and then turned and followed her through the lounge as she fled out the door. He hesitated and looked at his family standing stunned in the lounge room. "I'm sorry. Tell Julie…. I don't know. Tell her what ever you like."

"It's okay son. Just go. We'll sort out Julie. You go and look after Marissa." Sandy called out as Ryan went out the door.

As Ryan closed the door he heard Summer say. "You bet we'll sort out Julie."