Mexico
Disclaimer: see chapter 1
Thanks again to my Beta – Carol King – for precious help and suggestions. Thanks to all of you who read and posted a review. This is a very hard time at work for me, so updates aren't fast. And please remember, English is not my first language, I'm from North Italy, although this story has been written directly in English.
Here is chapter 3.
Jack went South with the cruise control on, his mind was disconnected but his eyes, hands and feet worked together controlling steering wheel and pedals. The truck followed obediently, it seemed to know the road by memory.
Afterwards, he did not remember anything of that journey, only feelings of emptiness like he never felt before and tears falling on his shirt.
He parked at 2 a.m. near a gas station in the middle of nowhere and took a short nap. The first ray of light and the sound of cars on the road woke him; it was 6 a.m. and he went into the station. Looking at the pumps, he thought to crash the truck full of gas against something with himself in it and wait for the big fire that would surely burn everything. And for the blessed peace that surely would follow. Nothing more for him to lose on earth.
But he was not man enough to end his life, always clinging to every tiny bit of hope. There was Bobby at home to live for and Ennis said "see you in a month", so why give up?
But he was lonely and sad, needed simply a human touch, a face to share his dreams with, a body to warm the chill of nights spent in the same bed with Lureen.
Words and touches of affection were memories of the past between them, after his reunion with Ennis in Riverton Jack become careful in slowing their intimacies, avoiding therefore another child.
Thank God, Lureen never was inclined to repeat the pregnancy experience.
For Jack, a son was enough. Being himself an only child, he felt a special connection with Bobby.
Jack put too much faith into the news of divorce, it was hard to acknowledge that for Ennis his daughters were more important than him.
Yesterday, when Ennis refused him, Jack was at a loss for words, the shock was too much and it burned all the hopes he treasured within with a sudden flame.
He remembered every detail of the scene, Ennis' face, the girls looking at them from the passenger window, dry grass and empty fields all around.
It was still early for sowing, the land was sterile and his life, too.
Thinking a lot about Ennis now was too painful, his mind refused to linger on it.
Jack was reaching his destination when the sign "Childress 25" appeared at a crossroad; he felt trapped again.
He was back with Lureen, LD and his work, all meaningless things.
His only joy in Texas was his son, his pride, too. It didn't matter to him if Bobby was not able to read perfectly, nobody from Twist family ever attended college.
That boy was so like him that LD sometimes treated Bobby as a stranger, not his own grandson. It seemed that the old man had the desire to erase everything reminding him of Jack Twist from his daughter and his home.
LD stored a deep hatred for Jack and after so many years the desire to leave everything behind and start a new life with Ennis was stronger than ever, quite unbearable.
Someday Jack and Bobby would go away and the old bastard would become the luckiest man on earth; Bobby could be happier living on a ranch, would learn much more from the animals than from hundreds of school books.
He pictured a brand new room for his kid in a house shared with Ennis, but it was only a dream, an illusion for a fool.
For Ennis I'm nothing, for me he's my life... Jack wanted to scream his rage at the top of his lungs, if only to ease the burden that started growing since his departure from Riverton and now, hundreds of miles after, was ready to crush him.
He finally entered Childress, 5 minutes from home.
His cheeks felt hot, there was sweat on his forehead and under his palms, the wheel became slippery.
Shit, what will I tell them? I'm back before I planned. She'll read my face like a book and LD, too. Both will laugh at me, cannot stay here, not now, too soon. Gotta hide somewhere for a few days, lick my wounds and find a new face to meet the world.
Jack needed to drink something soon, get lost in the confusion of a strange and new place, stop the words fighting in his mind.
The answer to his turmoil was simple, he cursed himself for not thinking of it before.
Where people with money could buy everything.
Where nobody listened to words spoken in a different language.
Where lots of rodeo men went to drink till they got drunk and to fuck without care.
Mexico..
Please add you opinion, thank you. Next update will be after July, 21…sorry but work for me is really terrible and I have to send next chapter to my Beta in any case.