I was contacted recently, by some guy's in blue suits, they work for Square-Enix, and told me I should add a disclaimer to the beginning of my chapters, or they'll cut my toenails... With a chain-saw.

Not really, but I figured we could have some more fun torturing the Turks, so from now on, there's gonna be two interactive bits to the Turk Olympics, the Questions, and the torture scene... Erm... Disclaimer... Hehe, be sure to review, and tell me ways I could use, to make the Turks talk, and if I like your idea, it'll appear at the beginning of the chapters.

Now Reno, will you say the disclaimer, pretty please?

Reno: No! Your making me look like an idiot, I refuse to have anything to do with this work of fan material!

Thank you Reno.

Reno: Wait, what! That doesn't count!

Yes it does, now, on with the fiction...

Pink...

It surrounded him, like darkness does to a guy in a closet.

He started to feel slightly intimidated.

Dammit, your a Turk Reno, don't tell me your scared of Rude's pink fluffy room!

"Fluffy?" Reno said out-loud, he looked around and over to the bed, sure enough, there bed was covered in fluffy things, what caught his attention though, was a blue teddy bear, he walked over and picked it up, it's shirt had a name embossed into it.

"Hehe, this can't be real, no way Rude has a teddy bear called-..."

Downstairs...

"Hey pops." Rude said, as he walked into the kitchen.

"Hey, it'sa little Rudy, whose thata' guy with da red haira'?" 'Pops' Jacques replied as he turned around.

"It's my partner... No, not that kind... We're bodyguards..."

"It'sa okay, I know about da Turks, ya made me a proud!"

"There is a reason we came though pops... We need your help..."

"You gotta yourself into trouble, huh?"

"Sort of... You see... Reno kind of assaulted my maid... Then she sued us... So we're broke..."

"So, you need a money, huh?"

"No! Listen, I'm not here for money pops... Reno decided that we're gonna enter the Old Guy Olympics... That's were you come in..."

A Couple of Minutes Later...

"And don't you a come back here again!" Pops shouted as he threw Reno and Rude out of his cottage and slammed the door shut.

"I told you this was a bad idea..."

"Yeah, yeah, how was I to know that your Dad would go berserk once you mentioned the word 'old'? At least I don't have a teddy bear called-..."

"Shut up! You leave the bear out of this."

"Hehe! Wait till Tseng here's about this! And that Tifa chick!"

"Don't you dare mention Mr.-" Rude was cut of as his PHS went of, he quickly whipped it out and answered it.

"Rude... Yes sir... Junon... We'll be back as soon as we can, sir..."

"What did Tseng want this time?"

Back At Midgar...

Tseng stood in his office, he placed his phone back in his pocket, and looked to his window. His nose wrinkled as he sniffed up.

I really need some deodorant... Maybe an air freshener too... And a Chocoburger would go down a treat right now... Tseng thought to himself, he pulled out his PHS again and dialed in a number.

Ring Ring...

"Elena here..."

"Elena, it's Tseng, I need you to do a very important mission..."

"Anything! You name it, and I'll do it!" (A/N: You people have dirty minds, if your thinking what I think your thinking...)

"Go to Kentucky Fried Chocobo™ , and get me a Chocoburger... Hold the sauce."

Two thoughts ran through Elena's mind.

Oh my god, he wants me to do a mission, I won't fail!

And

Oh my god, he's so lazy!

Regardless though, Elena snapped her phone shut and rushed to the Turk-mobile.

The Seventh Heaven Bar...

In another part of Midgar, the members of Avalanche were gathered in Tifa's pub, after just arriving back from their shopping trip.

Cloud was out back, helping the delivery men to unload his hair products.

Aeris was chomping on Marlene. While the little girl giggled.

Dr Barett was giving Nanaki an injection.

Tifa's breasts and Cid were having a lengthy discussion on UFOs.

While Vincent threw darts at the back of Aeris' head.

Yuffie suddenly burst into the room, screaming something about Turks and old men.

"Yuffie? What did you find out?"

"Your not gonna believe it!" She panted. Mind you, running from Midgar to Junon and back again tends to make you tired.

"What?" Everybody turned to face Yuffie and Tifa now... Well... Most of them... Erm... One of them... Vincent didn't actually give a damn. Nanaki was out cold, Aeris was choking on Marlene's hand, if a dead person can mind you... Anyway, Cloud was out back, and Tifa's breasts and Cid were still talking...

So Tifa and Dr Barett waited for Yuffie to answer.

"TheTurksareenteringtheoldmenOlympicsinordertowinsomemoneytopayfortheirlaywersandstuffbecauseRenohitRudesmaidandshesuedthemOMGWTFBBQ!1!LOL!1!" Yuffie screamed at the top of her lungs, as quick as she could. As you could guess, her shouting made everybody look at her, and in unison, say "Huh?"

Yuffie huffed, "I said, 'TheTurksareenteringtheoldmenOlympicsinordertowinsomemoneytopayfortheirlaywersandstuffbecauseRenohitRudesmaidandshesuedthemOMGWTFBBQ!1!LOL!1!' "

"O-Kay..." Everybody said in their own words.

"So what are we gonna do about it?" The bratty midget teenage ninja asked.

Junon...

"Wow, so that's what those repo guys were talking about... I could have sworn they took all our stuff already, who'd have known they'd take his stuff too?"

"He said that he fought a blue haired man, and beat him senseless... With a chocolate bar..."

"That's why he's the boss man, yo!"

"Yeah, I've noticed that too."

"Your right, I've never once heard him speak without his phone... Hmm..."

"Reno... Just be quiet... We need to get back to Midgar..."

Back At The Bar...

"So, it's agreed then, seeing as Vincent is over fifty seven years old, Dr. Barett's forty something, and I have nothing better to do, we're going to stop the Turks."

"But Tifa! Why can't I help!" Yuffie whined.

"Because your too hyper." Tifa replied to the little ninja.

"Discrimination! Discrimination!" The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle... Er... The Teenage Midget Ninja Hero screamed.

"I want no part of this..." Vincent suddenly spoke up, causing everybody to look at the ex-Turk. "What? Do I have something on my face? Is it a spot? It's not a spot right? Because if it is..." The gothic ex-Turk began to panic, I mean, who wouldn't, spots are very serious things, especially for somebody who can't walk a few feet without being swamped by fan-girls, and the occasional fan-boy.

"Well... That was strange... Anyway, Barett, lets go, the Olympics start in five days, we've got alot of planning to do!" Tifa said, as Vincent ran of to his bedroom.

Cueball's notes begin:

Not alot to say about this one, rush job really, just wanted to update it, and where I left it of last time wasn't the best place to continue, I promise to do better next chapter.

The reason for the long delay?

Well, there's multiple reasons, for one, I was on holiday, three weeks in Black-pool (big seaside resort to those not familiar with English towns/cities/villages, think of Florida, only colder, less sunny, and not as big, and more Bed and Breakfasts.) Great night life up there, to anybody's thats thinking of going.

Anyway, thats the main reason, but there are others, for example, work, parties, college, lack of ideas... Etc... I'm not gonna make excuses, I was busy... Right now though, hopefully I'm not gonna be as busy, but what with Christmas and New Years coming up, I can't exactly make any promises...

So yeah, the questions:

What's Rude's teddy really called? What have Tifa and Dr. Barett got up their sleeves? Will Tseng join his Turks in their dastardly scheme? Why did take away my option to talk to reviewers? Will I ever finished this story? And is that a phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?