This one came to me when one of my friends was whining about having to shop for his girlfriend. It was funny. Anyway, I hope everyone likes this one! This one is a lot more lighthearted than most, so beware!

And sorry! I thought I would be updating this more often, but as it turns out, I don't quite have the time. But I promise I will write/update as much as possible and ASAP!

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or the characters.

Tampons

"Got a girlfriend, Kurosaki?"

Ichigo turned around so fast he made his head spin. Glaring at the red-headed man standing behind him, he blushed the same shade of red as Renji's hair and turned back around, his eyes scanning the shelves for the item that must have made Renji suspect he had a girlfriend.

He said firmly, "No."

"Ah. Is it Inoue?

" 'It is Inoue 'what?" Ichigo asked, ducking out of sight as another man walked along the aisle.

"Your girlfriend."

"I just said I didn't have a girlfriend!" Ichigo sputtered. Renji smirked.

"Uh huh. Is it that Tatsaki girl?"

"I don't have a girlfriend."

"Is it ... um ... actually, you don't know may girls, do you?"

"Renji, shut up. By the way, what the hell are you doing in the tampon aisle?" Ichigo asked, raising his eyebrows at him. Renji shrugged. He said something along the lines of 'Nothing' or 'Because I saw you here', and Ichigo growled at him, letting his eyes wander back to the shelves and shelves of products.

"For ya mom?"

"My mom died when I was nine."

"Ah. Sorry."

Renji didn't speak for a few more minutes until he saw Ichigo reach out for a pack of the pads. He said,

"Well, if it's a girlfriend ... older girls, ya know, sixteen or so, prefer tampons. But if it's your sisters, get pads; little girls are uncomfortable wearing tampons."

"How would you know?" Ichigo asked, hiding behind Renji as he saw Ishida walk past him; this was probably the most common store in their town. Why had he come here again?

Well ... she hadn't threatened him like she usually did: I will vandalize your homework with bunnies. But, since they shared a bathroom, he knew she was out and he knew she needed them.

So ... yeah. That was why he was there.

Renji said, in response to Ichigo's question,

"Because I've lived about a hundred and a half more years than you, that's why. And while Rukia was in our group when we were young ... "

He trailed off and shrugged. Ichigo scowled and put the pads back on the shelf and picked up the tampons.

"Ah ha! So it is for a girlfriend!"

Ichigo growled loudly.

"I do not have a girlfriend!" Then, realization dawned on him. "Did you say that tampon VS. pads thing just to know who I was buying them for?"

"No. But really ... your sisters are the only ones I would imagine you shopping for, especially for something like this. From what I gathered about Earth people, men never shop for these things for their girlfriends."

"Renji, exactly what are you doing here in the first place?" Ichigo said between clenched teeth. If Renji said 'Girlfriend' one more time, he was going to ...

"Can I meet your girlfriend?"

That was it!

Ichigo ground his teeth so hard together that you could hear them.

"For the record, these are for Rukia. She usually threatens my homework, so I decided to fore-go the -"

"Your homework?" Renji said, almost laughing.

"Shut up!"

"You're shopping for Rukia?"

Ichigo glared at Renji and was all too aware of the blush rising to his cheeks.

"Yes. Want to make something of it?"

"No. But this will be very interesting news to report back to the Soul Society."

"Renji ... " Ichigo said in a warning tone.

Renji laughed and walked out. And somehow, as he forgot the tampons and ran after Renji, Ichigo felt sorry for the homework he knew was going to be vandalized by bunnies.

Utter ... insanity ... But I had fun. Hope you did, too!

Please Review!