puppiescute: Yes---very soon, as a matter of fact.
BJ: If he can pull off a British accent without sounding really really corny---sure, why not? Geraldo's is supposed to be Spanish, after all. The more accents, the better. Yay accents!
AuAu: Yeah, she really should recognize it. You'd think so. 'Course, several characters have wide heads: Harold, Mr. Hyuhn, that Ruth chick. I guess you gotta call it Willing Suspension of Disbelief, and leave it at that.
beady: Too many times, probably. It's like "The Lion King"; I've seen it so much I've practically memorized it.
JESS: You have a point about the character background; I would like to add more about Festinky and some of the others. If I figure out a way to do that without making it word for word from the story, I may in some future chapter.
***************************************
A few hours of running brought them to a grassy plain about halfway down the mountain. On one side lay the sea, blue and sparkling, and on the other, a steep ravine. (If someone happened to be walking along the bottom of this particular ravine, they would soon find themselves in a singularly unusual place known as the Fire Swamp--but more about that later.) The man in black halted, seeing that she was exhausted and panting from so much exercise. Although, he'd noticed, she still had plenty of energy for hurling occasional insults in his direction.
"Catch your breath," he ordered, releasing her arm. "We've still a long way to go before we're safe."
"Safe, schmafe. For all I know, you're planning to kill me the minute you get your ransom money," Helganna said bitterly.
"I never said I was holding you for ransom."
"Oh, please! Why else would you go to all this trouble? Besides...I can guess who you are now, and it makes absolute sense. You're the Dread Pirate Wolfgang! Admit it!" She scowled.
The masked man smiled and bowed low. "Pleased to make your acquaintance."
"And what's more," she continued, "...you're the rottenest, filthiest, most vile piece of scum ever to ooze its way out from under a rock!! I hope some big, horrible thing sits on you and squashes you like a disgusting cockroach. Because that's all you are--a loathsome, contemptible, odious insect!!!"
He frowned then. "Tsk, tsk, tsk. Such cranky words. Why are you so mad at me?"
"You spared a criminal today. But you didn't think twice about snuffing out the life of an honest man who never did a thing to hurt you or anybody. Three years ago you destroyed the only thing on this earth I ever loved. Why shouldn't I hate you?!"
"And who was this great love of yours? Another rich, idiotic prince?"
"NO!" she snapped. "A farm boy! Poor. Poor--and perfect..." she added softly.
He scoffed. "I seriously doubt that. No one is perfect, princess. There is no such thing as a completely honest man...or a completely honest woman, for that matter."
"What do you mean by that?"
He ignored her question. "I think I remember this farm boy of yours. Three years ago, you say? Blond guy, about my height? He died well; that should make you happy. No bribes or threats or tears...he simply said: 'Please'. 'Please--I must live.'" The man in black paced thoughtfully, continuing. "It was the 'Please' that caught my memory. I asked him what was so important that I should let him live, and do you know what he said?" He stopped pacing and looked her in the eyes. "True love, he said. And then, he told me of an amazing, beautiful girl--I can only assume he meant you--and the wonderful life they were going to share someday." The man in black straightened, a slight harshness in his tone. "You should thank me for destroying him before he found out what you really are."
"And what am I?" she demanded. Her voice was dangerously low.
"LOVE, princess! You speak of true love, as if you genuinely understood what it meant. But tell me; when you found out this farm boy was gone, did you run and get engaged to your prince that same day, or did you wait a whole week out of respect?!"
"Do NOT mock me!!!" she said furiously, anger welling up in her throat. "I died that day!!!" They were standing very close to the ravine now, and her temper was about to take control.
"...And you can die too, for all I care!"
She shoved him with every ounce of her strength, and he teetered at the edge of the ravine, arms waving wildly.
Then he fell, tumbling down, down, down, over the rocks, through the dirt, rolling bump, bump, bump along the steep side toward the gully at the bottom.
"I hope you hit all the sharpest rocks!" she yelled happily as he rolled.
Then in between grunts of pain, the man in black weakly shouted back to her.
"
.
.
.
A
a
a
a
a
a
a
a
a
s
.
.
.
.
.
y
o
o
o
o
o
o
u
u
u
.
.
.
.
.
w
i
i
i
i
i
i
i
i
i
i
i
i
i
i
i
s
h
.
.
.
.
.
"
Helganna's first thought was: Oh! What have I done now?! as she threw herself down the hill after him. Then she lost her footing and began to roll uncontrollably, and her second thought was: Boy--THIS was a stupid idea!
When the abduction was discovered, the whole of Florin was in an uproar, as you might well imagine. Haroldink was less than thrilled about the princess' disappearance, although he did make a point of asking whether he still had to get married. The answer was yes, of course--but it would take too long to find somebody new. That, and Phoebe had kindly explained to him the significance of the piece of cloth found under the saddle. If Guilder wanted a war, Florin was determined they would have to start it some other way--and thus he would have to retrieve Helganna at all costs.
By now, the searching party (Haroldink, Phoebe, and a few soldiers) had reached the mountain where the Battle of Wits took place. They had not found any of the original kidnappers; indeed, barely a trace was left of the three men at any spot by this time. Curllini was long gone when they arrived, as Geraldo and Festinky had been, but anyway the prince was more concerned with the fourth man they had tracked all the way from the Cliffs.
"Someone fell here," said Haroldink, kneeling and motioning to the grass by the stone table. "Whoever defeated the others must have followed and beaten this guy, too. Then he took the princess and ran off that way."
"If you say so, Your Highness," said Count Rhonda, the commander of the Florin army and another of Haroldink's right-hand-associates, second only to Phoebe. She couldn't read anything in the dust and gravel herself--and personally she thought Haroldink was sort of a doofus--but he did at least know how to hunt and track. "Can you tell where they're headed?" she asked the prince.
"If I may..." interrupted Phoebe, "It is most likely the princess was taken directly along this route down the mountainside, which would lead them eventually to the main port of Guilder. Judging from what Your Highness has managed to assess, I think it is safe to assume this mysterious fourth person managed to foil the original kidnapping---or perhaps betray the other three---with one of his own, and will try to escape with her in a ship. It may also interest Your Highness to know that the Fire Swamp is practically the only thing that could slow them down at this point. If we do not stop them on the far side of the swamp, we will lose them."
"Yeah--exactly what I was going to say," said Haroldink. (Count Rhonda rolled her eyes.) He stood, briefly gazing at the horizon that lay ahead of them, then mounted his horse. "All right--come on, men!"
"Ahem!" (Count Rhonda cleared her throat.)
"Oh....and Phoebe..."
"AHEM!!"
He groaned. "...And Rhonda. Let's go--there isn't a minute to lose!" The search party urged their horses forward, and rode off after the unsuspecting fugitives.
****************************
A/N: Yes, since she's a girl, technically it should be Countess Rhonda. But she is the captain of the army, and besides, 'Count Rhonda' rolls off the tounge better, not to mention it's closer to the original character. Say it with me. Cooouuuuuunt Rrrrhonnnnnndaaa. See, isn't that nice?
Another long time in between updates. I'll try to do better and not make any excuses. Excuses are like feet; if you got 'em, they probably stink.