WARNING:
I'm sick. Yes, psychically. No! I mean, I am physically sick, but... Dammit.
Let's just say that I have flu and veeery bad type of running nose... And it's horror for me, because I DO NOT get sick. Surely NOT for longer than 3 days, and when I'm writing this it's the 4th day!
So I can't move ENYWHERE without big supply of handkerchiefs, my eyes are red from crying (standard part of my catarrh, I can't help it no matter how I try...), I RAVE because of fever, and so on...
So this chapter will probably turn out to be really crazy, sick etc.
Look on the bright side. There's a chance, that I'll be the first person to die from running nose...
Live with hope, mortals.
By the way, really BIG thanx to:
Mistress DragonFlame
Mwafwa
Eien no kaze
Lady Dark Angel
Lina Gabriev
Ly Mizukage - and by the way - of course I know your page! I visit it just as frequently as :D
Amelia stood silently on stage with a blush on her face and a small sweatdrop. Zel was also blushing as he sat still (like a rock :SMASH: ...just joking...) in his chair.
„Okay lovebirds, Amelia, you can now go and change!" Haii patted her on shoulder.
„We're not love..." Ame tried desperately to deny, but Haiiro just threw her backstage.
„So, people, any comments?"
One man in the audience (which was now about half size smaller since departure of Zel's funclub) rose his hand. Girl flew to him.
"Yes?"
"Hay, babe, ya know who I am? Surely know who I am." Haii tried to interrupt, but he didn't let her "I just wanted to say, babe, tha that sweet chiccy who was there just a minute ago, yes, minute ago, I'm lookin' for chic like her, 'cause, babe, I'm the famous Ric Phal, autographs later, sweetheart, an' I'm lookin' for a chic with such figure, ya know what I mean, an' I'm making an advertisement of my new collection of furry underwear, and..."
'Fireball!'
Guy was burnt into crisp. Haiiro sweatdropped thinking how to hide another murder and looked at the stage.
Zelgadis was...well, more than pissed out. How dare that guy even think about his princess taking part in something like that? It was just... sick. Amelia would never agree. Well, the guy was lucky, that she didn't hear that.
Anyone noticed 'his' before the word 'princess'? ;D
"What's going on?" Ame came back. Haii quickly hid broom and bag filled with some dust behind her back and Zel just laughed nervously.
"Heh, heh, nothing" They've said in the same time.
Ame shrugged and took her seat.
"Aaaaaaaalright people" Haiiro threw both things she held to Xellos " Next will be Filia!"
Blonde carefully, wanting not to make any unnecessary moves rose from her seat and her eyes not leaving Haii approached to her.
Xellos smirked. 'The real fun begins' he thought.
Still very carefully, Filia took all cards from host's hands and read them.
"Oh, come on. You're acting as if I'd do something to you if you made a sudden movement or something..." Haii rolled her eyes
Lina and Amelia coughed.
"I choose this one" said Filia after carefully studying one of cards. Haiiro took it from her hand and read it too.
"OK." she smiled.
"NO, WAIT!" ex-priestess snatched it from surprised girl's hand and read it again.
"What's the matter?"
"If you agreed WITHOUT any complains, it means that there is SOMETHING in this song!" and Filia came back to studying the text again.
"Maybe magnifying glass?" blonde jumped away when she saw unnaturally magnified amethyst eye next to her face. Than, regaining her senses and slowing her pulse, she...
"Thanks." ..Snatched it from Xel's hand and looked with it at the paper.
"Hay, there's nothing in that text. You chose it, you sing it! Simple." Haiiro shrugged. Filia send her a suspicious look and with a sigh handled her back card with her song. Before girl started her talk, blonde went backstage.
"Aww.. she's not fun." She looked at Xel who still stood at the stage, with a shock on his face and a broom and bag still in his hands. "Umm, hello? You can sit down now."
"What? Who? Where? It's a secret! ... what?" mazoku blinked in Gourry's style.
"Nevermind... To make this show more interesting, I'm not going to have an interview with any of you boring guys out there, so for a while you can go and use our buffet!"
"EAT!" Gourry and Lina yelled in unite and they, among with whole audience, security and odd people who shown up hearing 'buffet', run in food's direction. Room was now completely empty ( Zel and Amelia were took along with crowd and Xellos was probably off to spy on Filia).
"Heh heh... Now, let's take advantage of the situation and have a crazy self-talk" Haii grinned and quickly with her ALMIGHTY PEN she drew a simple face on her left hand.
"Finally, I've thought that we will never talk again. So, can I ask you one question?"
"Sure."
"Why you let Filia with that non-embarrassing song?"
"I've..."
"You didn't even try to change the lyrics like you did with Zel's song!"
"She took the lyrics with her..."
"Dammit! So what are you going to do NOW?"
"Let me finish. I didn't do anything 'bout Filia's lyrics, because I hope that certain mazoku's gonna do it for me."
"Aahhh... crafty one..."
In this moment Xel teleported back on the stage. He was drooling and blushing like mad.
Left-hand man looked at Haii worryingly (how could he? No idea. )
"I don't even want to know where he was and what he saw."
After a hour of running around and trying to collect everyone, chasing them with torches, forks, shovels, physics workbooks and accidentally running into Zelgadis and Amelia who seemed to have a closer moment... not that anything happen... but who knows what would if she run into them ten minutes later...
Anyway, after all that everyone sat in their places, even Xel (still with broom in his hand, dust from bag was spilled in the corner of the room), and Haiiro got ready to present Filia.
"So. All ya too-hungry-to-come freaks around. I'd like to present Filia ul Copt as Natasha Bedingfield in the song "Unwritten"!"
"Yaay... ... woohoo... :clasp:clasp: " audience was burnt, hurt etc. Do not expect too much of them...
All lights directed on the entrance to the stage. When Filia entered whole male part of the audience went crazy:
"yaa... :clasp:clasp: ... cough... cough..."
... as I said before, don't expect too much...
Xellos turned his had slowly to look at dragon and he froze.
As he studied her, from her slim legs, through knee-length, green dress, black top sticking from under it, to her face, he felt that he's heart started to beat faster.
Actually his heart was in a fridge X miles away on the Wolfpack Island, but mazoku always kept in touch with it, so he knew. Simple.
'She IS beautiful...' he whispered to himself. Thankfully for him, sitting closest to him Amelia was now concentrated on what had nearly happened in that room before that freak with rubber chicken came in... but that later. So she didn't hear that rather amusing comment.
(Read it slowly... I missed sense of this sentence in the midway, but I'm sure that it's still quite understandable...)
"Filia, who do you want to dedicate this song to?"
'that question...'
Xellos made puppy eyes "Dedicate it to me! Pleaaaaaaase?" he mocked.
Filia twitched. 'Just calm down, just calm down... Okay. I have 5 peopl...person to choose from. Lina... would fireball me. Gourry... Lina would fireball me later, Amelia...' she looked at her and noticed, that princess was now pretending that she's NOT looking at certain chimera, and that certain chimera was pretending that he does NOT see it. She sweatdropped.
":sigh: I'd like to dedicate this song to the only person left, to one lousy, stinking, awful and annoying Namagomi."
"Hey!" mentioned above frowned.
Music started and Filia began to sing.
I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefinedNods from all around. Filia twitched.
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
„Dirty? Miss Filia is too obsessed with cleaning for that... Not like some people I know..." princess glanced at Lina.
„What was THAT supposed to mean?"
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
"Like when we gave her a carrot on a stick to make her fly faster!"
:twitch:
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
Suddenly, everyone heard loud 'boom!' and dark clouds started to gather over Filia's head. Blonde blinked and than a heavy rain fell on her skin. Knowing WHO's to be accused of this, she took her mace, turned to Xellos and threw it at him yelling 'NAMAGOMI!'
He was crying on the floor from laughter, so didn't even see this coming.
He wasn't too horrified when Filia's mace rammed into his head either.
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
...Has the strength to smash his lousy face...
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
:boom: lighting struck the microphone sending a lot of sparks all around. Ex-priestess just sighed and continued.
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
Oh, oh, oh
I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We've been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can't live that way
"It suits her. Well, she rejected being a priestess, didn't she?" Lina looked over Gourry at Zel. He nodded and Gourry glanced from one to another, somehow disappointed that they weren't talking to him. By the way, it's rude to ignore the person next to you and talk with another one.
Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Redhead felt someone poking at her arm. She turned to see that it was Gourry.
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
"Hay, umm... you know, that part about inibitions is good too. Isn't it? Suits her, ne?" he gave Lina an innocent look.
"Yes, your right." She smiled, and seeing this so did he. Than, they both came back to watching Filia.
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
"And by the way Gourry, it's inhibitions." She chuckled.
Gourry sighed. 'I can't do anything right.' He thought..
:Place for big 'aaaaaaaawww' and moment I should stop writing until my temperature is normal again... no chance. So I continue, buahahahahaa...' :
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Unnoticed, Xel clutched the broomstick as he watched Filia's performance. Well, by this time rain had made her clothes really wet, so they clang to her body leaving very little to imagination...
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Amelia turned around thinking that she hadn't heard Xellos for a while. Surprisingly, she found him staring fascinated at blonde on stage.
:sweatdrop:'umm.. better not disturb him now...' she thought
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten...
"Great!" yelled Haiiro, supported by applause of audience.
Even Xel realised suddenly that he's clasping too. Strange...
Filia went backstage to change and Xellos quickly teleported himself to Haii's side.
"And what do you have for me?"
Girl simply handled him two cards.
"Two? Don't you think that I should have more to choose from?"
"Nope." She grinned sheepishly.
With a sigh mazoku read the first one. His eyes widened and a devious smile appeared on his face.
"I take this one!" he handed it to Haiiro. She also smiled.
"I just knew you'll like this one... So you can go and change."
He nodded and teleported away.
...hey...
...wait...
...but...
Something was wrong.
...hmmmmmmmmmmmmm...
"XEL! THERE IS ONLY ONE CHANGING ROOM AND FILIA ISN'T BACK YET!"
:BOOM:SMACK:
And so Xellos was back with his beloved broom crashed on his head.
Moments later Filia got back, red both from anger and embarrassment.
"You deserved that..." she mumbled 'accidentally' stomping on Xel's face.
"Itaii..." he coughed up and weakly stood up. "Anyway, I have something that belongs to you" he smirked and took from his sleeve... red bra.
Filia flushed and put a hand on her back to check if her bra was there...
"NAMAGOMI! HOW? JUST A MOMENT AGO I WAS WEARING IT I'M SURE!"
Gourry blinked. "What a frivolous underwear, Filia..."
Lina smacked him with her fist.
Angry blonde snatched her underwear from Xel's hand, sent him with a kick backstage and sat on her armchair. One man from security, who just happened to walk beside her, patted her on shoulder, slipping a 10 dollars banknote and his phone number behind her neckline.
Ex-priestess couldn't blush more so she just smashed the guy with her bra yelling "HENTAI! PERVERT!"
Haiiro sweatdropped again. 'Next time when I'll be hiring security I'll read those notes about possible behaviour.'
Minutes later, there could he heard footsteps which were sign, that Xellos is ready.
Lights in the room dimmed.
Haii went to the middle of the stage.
"Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to present you..."
footsteps were now louder:
tap... tap... tap... boom..."Damn shoes.. I can't even walk in them..." ... tap.. tap...
"Xellos Metallium as Right Said Fred in..."
Mazoku entered the stage. He had his hair tousled (so-called 'artistic chaos') and he was dressed in deep red shirt, black trousers and... Strange, black leather shoes with a little high-heel. He had also black hat on his head. Despite that strange combination – he looked sexy. ;)
All lights directed on him and he sent an alluring smile to the audience.
"Yaaayyy! Wohooo:applouse:applouse:"
Few girls fainted, but no one took care of them. People can be so mean...
Again breaking Haii's fun, Xellos snatched the microphone from her hand before she managed to say anything.
"I'd like to dedicate this song to Filia..." he pointed at her and not jealous part of the room applauded. Others just 'hmpf'ed.
"The most beautiful, nice and amazing..." Ex-priestess blushed.
"...dragoness with really nice body and breast size..." he was cut by Haiiro's fist in his head.
"Give me that back." She took microphone. "Sing before something bad happens to you."
Gourry tried to think for a while.
"Lina, how does he know Filia's body that well?"
Lina smirked deviously and making sure that Filia can't hear her said "He probably often sneaks to her room at night..."
"Miss Lina! What kind of dirty thoughts are these!" appalled Amelia
Xellos sighed and music started.
"But what's the title of this song?" yelled Lina
I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love
Love's going to leave me
Everyone sweatdropped.
„After this song Filia surely will..." mumbled Lina.
Thankfully, dragon didn't hear that. She was to shocked. And by the way, she couldn't take her eyes off him... not only from shock ;)
I'm too sexy for my shirt too sexy for my shirt
Xel started to strip, what made whole famine part (and a few men) drool. Zelgadis protectively covered Amelia's eyes and Lina just turned around too ashamed to look at the stage.
Gourry again proved his lack of brain and happy-go-luckily went to sleep.
So sexy it hurts
And I'm too sexy for Milan too sexy for Milan
New York and Japan
And I'm too sexy for your party
Too sexy for your party
No way I'm disco dancing
Suddenly, mazoku took sunglasses a'la Elvis and started to dance on stage, moving his hips in.. very certain way. Audience 'wohooo'ed and Xel sent a look to Filia.
Dragoness blushed deeply and looked away.
I'm a model you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah
I do my little turn on the catwalk
Xellos made a walk as if he really was a model and winked to the audience.
I'm too sexy for my car too sexy for my car
Too sexy by far
And I'm too sexy for my hat
Too sexy for my hat what do you think about that
He threw his hat in the air spectacularly. Pitifully, it didn't make anything like 'flying with grace and landing on someone's head', but it made a big hole in the wall and flew into the space.
I'm a model you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah
I shake my little touche on the catwalk
Suddenly, Filia rose from her armchair. Xellos stopped singing and looked at her puzzled.
She had half-closed eyes and wore a seductive smile on her face. She made her way to him, moving her hips in the way that made mazoku feel as if suddenly someone turned on the heating.
Haiiro crouched next to the radiator.
"What?"
Filia approached to sweatdropping Xellos and put a hand on his shoulder.
"You know what?" she purred "I just wanted to tell you now, that... maybe we could meet somewhere after this?" she continued sweetly "In case I forgot later..." unnoticed, she slipped on Xel's lyrics a piece of paper.
Mazoku swallowed hardly. "Um, Filia?" then realising his chance he returned his usual, mocking smile. "As you wish"
She just smiled in return and went back to her place. Xellos sent her one final look and continued to sing, not noticing a little 'extra' she gave him.
I'm too sexy for my brain too sexy for my brain...
Too sexy for my brain...HEY!
Filia and Zelgadis started to laugh maniacally and they shook their hands congratulating their idea. Xellos just twitched coming back to his.. 'cough'cough'... normal lyrics..
'Cos I'm a model you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah
I shake my little touche on the catwalk
I'm too sexy for my cat too sexy for my cat
Poor pussy poor pussy cat
Xel took a cat from nowhere and threw it to the audience.
And because that cat can't die (or I'll have police on my back) all mazoku's fangirls jumped to catch it.
One of them, Helga Milyanowa, who was... um.. you can say a big girl, with red pigtails and freckles all over her body, picked up a table and cleared her way with it. Than, she caught flying cat and yelled
"Yeah, Xelly's kitty is mine! Hahaha haaaaaark hahaha!"
Xellos paused and sweatdropped.
"Poor pussy cat..." he said. Than, trying to ignore his... big fangirl, he continued.
I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love
Love's going to leave me
Tears came to Helga's eyes.
"You want to leave me? After all we've been through? After you gave me your kitty?"
'Kitty' desperately tried to free himself or at least to catch breath.
"You... You... BASTARD! All men are the same!" she ran out with cry, leaving poor animal behind.
Unnoticed, Filia took cat in her arms and went backstage, nestling it carefully...
And I'm too sexy for this song...
Xellos bowed and whole audience stood up clasping, whistling and doing all crazy things to show their enthusiasm. But Xellos, playin 'hard guy' ignored his whole fanclub and looked in Filia's direction. But her chair was empty!
Not noticing battle that started on stage (there was no more security left and Xel's fangirls wanted to capture the stage. Lina and co had to do something. Otherwise buffet would be lost...)
Xellos went to the dark labyrinth of backstage and suddenly he heard Filia's voice. He opened the door and he saw ex-priestess sitting on the floor and stoking the cat.
"...umm.. knock knock?" he said with big smile.
"MMEeeeeaaaaaowth!" animal was still in big trauma and hearing suddenly someone's voice it jumped in the air and started running around the room. Surprised Xel clumsily tried to catch it, but cat just made use of space between his legs and run from the room.
Filia stood up angrily.
"What have you done, namagomi!" she yelled "Now I won't find him!"
She quickly went to the corridor lookin' for kitty.
"Xelly, Xelly, whre are you! Hey, kitty, kitty..." she yelled
Xellos was astonished.
"Filia?"
"What!" she turned around
"... you... named that cat after me?"
Naaah... it took me forever to write everything down. I've nearly got rid of whole sickness (sorry, it seems that I won't die. Not from flu, at least. Now.), but I still rave more than usual. And you should hear my voice - my friends've had great laughs from me past few days... Andbefore I ended this chapter I wrote and sent my homework to my English teacher (it's nice to have a teacher to whom you can send you homeworks at e-mail), so I've had enough English for today. Nice language but... Today I've had ANOTHER dream in English! That'll be the THIRD ONE! Omg... End.
Of course R&R! I'll try to make next chap more 'sane'. I promise. And I wouldn't mind suggestions... tee hee.
And something what maybe will cheer you up - I've already started working on next chapter.