Hey! thank you for the reviews and sorry it took so long! but here's chapter five!
Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill or any of the music used in my fanfics...
Chapter 5: Giving It Time
Nathan stared out the hospital room window uncomfortably, his back to Haley who was gazing admiringly at the little girl in her arms, and would occasionally glance quickly back at Nathan who was shifting back and forth.
"You want to hold her?" Haley smiled excitedly, unable to believe how absolutely beautiful her little girl was.
"Haley..." Nathan protested. Haley shook her head painfully, then looked back down at her baby. This time she worried, Nathan was making it more and more clear that this separation was what he wanted.
"She's your daughter too..." Haley whispered, already not wanting to create an upsetting environment for her baby. Nathan didn't respond.
"Haley..." Nathan repeated in what sounded like annoyance, but it wasn't supposed to be. "Im not ready for this, its not that I don't love you guys, I just have dreams..."
Haley noticed how his back was still turned, even when he was talking to her. " Why won't you look at her Nathan?" Haley asked, remembering how he wouldn't hold her when the nurse offered, and how he' had his back turned like that since the nurse put her in her arms.
"Stop it..." Nathan bit his lip in frustration. But then he couldn't fight it, slowly, he turned and gazed at his daughter. He smiled sadly at her in awe, wondering what it was he was throwing away. Then he shut his eyes tightly and turned back around.
"When I married you, I thought that you would be ready for a family... that you wanted one for me. And I thought that even if it came unexpectedly, you'd be enough of a man to be a father, like your daughter needs. But I guess you weren't who I thought you were..." Haley shot out.
"My father ruined my childhood, he really screwed me up... I don't want to do that to her..." Nathan whispered, turning again to smile at his daughter.
Haley looked at him, eyes wide like she had finally solved a mystery. " That's what this is really about isn't it?" Nathan just shrugged and walked to their side. He rubbed a shaky hand across his daughter's face, then removed it quickly, afraid of how fragile she seemed. Quietly he looked at Haley who was still waiting for an answer. Thinking about it, he shrugged. " You're not like your father Nathan..." Haley smiled, thinking now, that this could all soon be over, now that she actually knew what was going on with him.
" I think it's in our genes..." Nathan smirked. When he did Haley's heart jumped, she had missed that smirk.
"We don't know that... you haven't given it a chance..." Haley smiled at him, waiting for him to accept it all, and come back to them.
"I don't want her to have to find out Haley. I can't let her find out. Just in case..." Nathan sighed and walked towards the door. " I should go now..." Haley stared at him, two second ago she was thinking it would all be over, and that everything was going to be okay, but now here he was again with his back to them, walking away. Anger grew in her heart.
"If you walk out of our daughter's life, don't bother coming back when it's too late. When you've missed all the important things... like her first words, and step ...and..." Haley's face flushed with tears as she broke into a lonely sob. Nathan looked back at her, so mad with himself for doing this, but not turning around, he kept walking, right out the door, out of the hospital, out of the parking lot, out of there lives. While Haley laid there, holding their daughter, broken with tears.
"Haley?" Lucas asked, becoming broken at the sight of Haley's pain. " What happened?" he asked, rushing to her and holding her in his arms as she held the baby. It was so long since Lucas was able to comfort his sister and it felt good to be there for her, and for her it felt good to have them there. It seemed to calm her that they could be like this again.
"He's really gone..." Haley sighed as she calmed herself by looking down at the small life in her arms.
"He's crazy... he has no idea what he's missing out on.. Trust me..." Lucas smiled. This helped Haley relax a bit. " Don't you dare go thinking you're going to be alone. Because you're not. You have us." He smiled again. Haley nodded, and smiled slightly as she rested her head on Lucas's shoulder.
After a few minutes Haley was calm. " Natalie..." Haley whispered.
Lucas raised his head to look at her. " What?"
"It's her name..." Haley smiled down at her.
"Haley..." Lucas said hesitantly.
"It's okay. It's.. great actually." She smiled, sniffing and inhaling deeply after all the crying.
"Hey Haley..." Brooke smiled from the doorway. She stood there shyly, holding Michael's tired hand.
"I was wondering when you'd be here..." Haley smiled at them. Brooke and Michael shifted to Lucas's side, next to Haley. Brooke took Michael in her arms and kissed his forehead. They all just stood there staring down at Natalie, smiling. But inside, Haley was aching for Nathan to be there too. Lucas was aching for his time back, so he cold have done this with Brooke. And Brooke was aching for Lucas to have been there too.
Lucas was staying at Karen's, the same place Brooke was staying for that weekend, sleeping in his own room, or at least trying to. He finally beginning to fall asleep when he heard the patter of little footsteps on his bedroom floor. He raised his head to see Michael standing there shyly.
"I didn't want to wake up my mommy." Michael whispered. "She's really tired.
"Oh, okay, what's wrong?" Lucas asked, wiping his eyes and sitting up on the edge of his bed.
"My belly hurts." Michael said sadly, letting his head fall.
"Oh..." Lucas said, he knew exactly what to do, Erica always got bad bellies, but he always knew it was a child's way to say they were actually afraid. Lucas slowly crawled out of his bed, not wanting to wake Erica who was sleeping soundly next to him.
"Okay, first question: Scooby Doo, or Spongebob?" Lucas laughed, holding two movie cases up to Michael for him to choose. This was how he did it for Erica, it made her fall asleep.
Michael laughed with excitement. " Scooby!"
"Okay, second question... chocolate or vanilla?" He asked, pulling out two containers of ice cream.
"Ice Cream? Now?" Michael said, eyes wide.
"I won't tell if you won't." Lucas laughed.
"I Won't!" Michael gasped. Soon there were both laying on the couch watching the DVD. Michael was laying in front of Lucas, cuddled into him. He was usually such a shy boy, but he seemed to find a certain comfort with Lucas.
"Lucas?" Michael asked, when everything was silent.
"Yea?" Lucas yawned.
"Did you know my dad?" It was the first time Michael ever spoke to anyone about his dad in a really long time, he didn't like seeing his mommy cry, which she did when he'd ask.
"Um yea, pretty well actually." Lucas sighed.
"Where is he?" The little boy asked, in almost a sad voice.
"He's, around...why?" Lucas asked, not wanting to tell him that he was his father, not yet anyways, it would be too confusing for him.
"Why did he leave us?"
"He didn't want to buddy, but, him and your mom were really young, and it was hard." Lucas whispered, not wanting to tell him that his mom left before he even knew.
"Does he love us though?"Michael whispered, finally falling to sleep.
"Yea, he does." Lucas whispered, as he kissed the back of Mikey's head. "More than you know." When he looked down, Michael was fast asleep.
"MIKEY!" Brooke yelled from the top of the stairs, frightened when she woke up and saw that he was gone. "Mikey! Hunny!" She whined.
"He's asleep on the couch." A sad voice whispered from the bottom of the stairs.
"Oh..." Brooke said, relieved. She got to the bottom of the stairs and noticed how sad Erica was. "What's wrong sweety?"
"My daddy's asleep there with him." She pouted with jealousy, folding her arms in front of her.
"What?" Brooke said. Darting into the living room to see them sleeping soundly on the couch together. "Uh oh." She looked over at Erica, who still looked really jealous. "Breakfast?" She asked, trying to lighten her spirits.
Erica's eyes lit up. "Yesss!" She said, clapping her hands and running into the kitchen.
"You're Brooke?" She asked, as Brooke lifted her onto a stool that she was too small to get on herself.
"Um, yea, how did you know?" Brooke said, as she pulled cereal boxes out of the cupboard.
"My daddy talks about you..." Erica said, swaying back and forth. She always loved spending time with other girls, especially since she didn't have a mom to do those things with. Then she thought, "Brooke?"
"Yea." Brooke said, trying not to show her happiness that she was feeling that Lucas still talked about her.
"Will you be my mommy... for today?" She asked her casually, but at the same time, hopefully.
"What do you mean?" Brooke said nervously.
"Well, I don't have a mommy, she left. And all my friend's mommies take them shopping and stuff, and I really like shopping, but my daddy won't take me so... would you do those things with me for today?" She asked hopefully. Brooke was in heaven, a little girl who loved shopping and wanting Brooke to go with her!
"Sure!" Brooke laughed.
Later that day, Brooke had taken Michael and Erica shopping, and Lucas and haley were home alone. Lucas walked into the kitchen where Haley was feeding Natalie. "Hey.." Haley laughed. "Heard you had some pretty good bonding time with your son." Haley smiled.
"Yea..." Lucas raised his eyebrows and took a deep breath. Quietly, he sat on the stool and started drawing circles on the counter with his index finger, resting his head in his other hand. "How ya doin?" He asked.
"Really good, actually..." Haley smiled as she looked down at Natalie.
"Good." Lucas said, again, exhaling deeply.
"How are you doing?" Haley asked, looking at him seriously.
"Not as good." He laughed. Haley laughed too.
"I know exactly what's going on in your little blond head." Haley said, as she laid Natalie in her bassinet.
"What?" Lucas asked, lifting his head to look at her.
"I know exactly what you're thinking." Haley said, but then she gave him a warning look.
"You're thinking everything could work out now, you guys could all be one big family."
"Yea... I mean, we could right. Mikey is, wow, great. I can't believe I missed all that time. And why wouldn't it work now?"
"Try telling a five year old girl that she has a half brother who has a different mommy, and they happen to be the people she met last week. And telling a five year old boy that the man sleeping down the hall at the place he stays on weekends, his aunt's brother, is his father." Haley said, still bright and cheery, sitting next to him on a different stool.
"Ouch." Lucas said, pouting. "Never thought of it like that."
"Luke, I want things to work out for you and Brooke, you know I do. But, it's too much too soon for the kids, it's not just you and Brooke involved in this anymore, there are two more. And they don't exactly have the understanding of a twenty three year old either." Haley smiled sadly.
"Yea..." Lucas smiled back.
"Don't worry, just give it some time." Haley smiled, pulling him in for a hug.
"You too..." Lucas smiled. Haley inhaled sharply, and Lucas just laughed.
Okay, there it was, hope you liked it... review review review please:)