Chapter 21: Collide
"This is amazing..." Haley whispered happily as she stared around the brightly colored room. "I mean..." She breathed. "Wow."
"I hoped you'd like it." Nathan smiled. He walked behind her and put his arms around her waist, resting his chin on her shoulder.
"It's perfect..." Haley smiled. She turned around and wrapped her arms around his waist, letting her head fall onto his chest. "One more day." She whispered. He leaned back and looked at her happily. "Then we get to start again, with Natalie."
"I can't wait to bring her home." Nathan smiled, squeezing Haley tighter. Haley laughed and hugged him back. "You know, Hales," Nathan sighed. "We can't keep living like this." When Haley looked up at him, his face was serious and stern, and all she could think about was the empty place on his finger where his wedding ring used to be. In this moment things seemed great, did he not want this all along?
"Luke!" Brooke yelled as she ran upstairs, throwing her coat onto the floor. "Are you here?" She yelled again.
"In here!" Lucas yelled back. He was sitting in their computer room, typing a new chapter to the book he was now writing. Whenever he needed to get away from this world, he wrote, totally subjecting himself into a new world, one where things could go however he wanted them to.
Brooke appeared in the doorway and sighed with relief as she saw him there. He glanced over at her, wondering why she had been so worked up. "Im surprised to see you here." She admitted. She walked over and fell into the chair next to him. Lucas didn't respond to this, truthfully, he didn't want to. He had been so caught up in his battle for Erica lately, he had barely noticed if Brooke was alive, and he didn't have time to fix it right now.
He turned back to the computer and began to write again. "Where's my daughter?" He asked. He hadn't realized how cold and hurtful his word sounded. They stung into her, and she flinched a bit at the sound of them.
"Your daughter, is at a sleep over across the street, with my son." Brooke snapped. She got up and left the room, her hand over her mouth to hold back her sobs. Lucas didn't even hear what she had said. He had asked a question and didn't have time to listen for her answer. He had brought her back into this life, making her sacrifice everything for him and Erica, and he was too caught up in his own things to notice she was still living and breathing.
"What are you doing, Peyton?" Jake asked as he walked up to Peyton, sitting on her front porch, happily drinking a cold drink. She had been thinking about everything she had done to Lucas and Brooke over the last couple weeks, and she couldn't help but smile with satisfaction.
"Well," She said in a sarcastic tone. "Im almost done my drink now, and Im about to go get another!" She laughed evilly. Jake just rolled his eyes. He was used to her old games. After her father had died at sea, she had become this evil monster. She used to be happy and sweet, and she used to be the girl he fell in love with. But she wasn't that person anymore, she died with her father.
"You know what I mean." Jake said impatiently. He sighed as he stood there, his hands in the pockets of his jacket. He was kicking a few rocks in front of him, not able to look her in the eye. He didn't want to disappoint himself. Because if he looked in her eyes, he was afraid that he would search for something that wasn't there anymore.
"No..." Peyton said, looking around as if the answer were in the night sky.
"That kid doesn't even look like me. And I know she isn't mine." Jake said angrily. He hated the way she was acting, the way she had acted for the past five-almost six-years.
"If you know she isn't your's, then why did you take the test." Peyton asked, an evil grin on her face.
Jake thought for a second. "For Luke. If I denied Erica, and didn't take the test, he'd be wondering what-if she isn't actually his daughter, for the rest of his life." Jake lied. That wasn't why he took the test. Though it made sense, it wasn't his reason. And his reason? Was because Erica was conceived back when Peyton was herself. And the thought of having a child, with the real Peyton, was something he had always dreamed of, it could have been his ticket back to her. And if the tests came out positive, he'd do his best to fight for his family. Though he was positive they wouldn't.
"But Jakey..." Peyton said in a fake, whiny voice. "There's always a chance she is your daughter, I mean, we did sleep together, remember?" Peyton smiled, taking the last mouthful of drink and swallowing it.
"Oh yea..." Jake smiled to himself. "I remember."
Haley stared up at Nathan's serious face, her eyes wide. She wasn't sure how she should act. But as she started to step out of his embrace, he pulled her back, and nuzzled her neck. She had no idea what he was doing. One minute he was saying they couldn't live like this, then he was acting as though he wanted to do it forever. She was staring off with confusion, with Nathan's warm laugh broke her from her thoughts.
"We definitely can't live like this!" He laughed, holding her tighter and tighter with each word. His voice drained out as he groaned.
"What are you talking about!?" Haley complained. This time she did step back, and though he tried not to let her, she made him let go of her. She crossed her arms on her chest and waited for his answer.
She was giving him a hard, serious, terrified look, when he smile sweetly and reached out for her hand. Lifting it to his mouth, he kissed it softly. "I mean, we can't live like this. We're married Haley, and you live on the other side of town." He whispered. He used her hand to pull her in again. Haley let out a small sigh of relief, and thought it would be a good time to bring it up.
"Married? No we're not." She whispered. She smiled at him sadly.
"I don't care what those papers say. We have to be separated for a year. There's no way it's right." He shook his head and swallowed a lump in his throat.
"If that's how you feel, why did you take off your ring?"Haley asked, raising one eyebrow at him.
Brooke walked into her room, stomping on the way, and shut the door. She waited for a second, wondering if Lucas would come after her. But there were no footsteps outside the door. All she could hear was the continuous clicking of his keyboard. She wanted to cry again, just sit down on the floor and cry, but she had been all cried out now. She wondered if she'd ever cry again. All she could think about was how she should have stayed in New York with her son. She shouldn't have made him go through all this. She felt as though she had been so incredibly selfish.
The clock radio next to their bed was playing a slow, sad song. Brooke sat on the edge of the bed, turned it up, then laid down, staring at the ceiling.
"tell me can you sleep at night
knowing I'm awake
when you turn out the light
did you think that I was gonna be alright
kicked out of your life
now tell me can you sleep at night"
Brooke listened to the words of the song. Did you think that I was gonna be alright? Kicked out of your life? Now tell me can you sleep at night? "Seems appropriate." Brooke whispered to herself. The music was so slow and so sad, it was as if the radio was playing the soundtrack to her life. And now you'll have to smile and just pretend. She didn't want to do that. She didn't want to be that poor girl from all those movies, who buried her feelings away, as a sacrifice for her love. It wasn't that she wouldn't do it, she just didn't want to.
She heard a ruffling in her closet, and she looked up to see Lucas rummaging through some old papers in a box. "Did you see that book, the one that I read in school that time, I think I loaned it to you once." He said, still looking around. "I was looking for a quote."
"You can't remember what the name of that book was?" Brooke asked with surprise and hurt. Lucas just shook his head. That book was the reason for their first date. The reason for everything. "What was it about, Luke?" Brooke tested him. She finally felt tears stinging in her eyes. She thought she'd never cry again. But he made her cry, another thing she couldn't believe. She was sure he didn't mean to, he was just so... preoccupied, lately.
"Ahh...I can't remember." He said casually. He got up and looked at Brooke. He hadn't noticed her crying. And all he could wonder was how often she did this. She was sitting on the bed, her arms wrapped around her knees, crying silently. She took two short breaths, trying to calm herself, but then the sobs surfaced. Lucas stared at her. Had she done this a lot? It seemed as though this picture was beginning to match her. Had he not seen her enough to notice.
"Listen, Jake.." Peyton sighed. She looked him straight in the eye, and he couldn't help but look back. He didn't want to, but there was so much temptation in his body, he had to. "Just roll with it? Okay?" She smirked. She glanced away for a quick second, and a frame seemed to leave her eyes, as if for that one second, the old Peyton screamed to get out.
"Do you miss you father, Peyt?" Jake asked. He wanted to temp her, push her around until this armor she was wearing finally crumbled, and her true colors were showing.
"Don't talk about him!" Peyton screamed. She got up and started to run up to her door. But she stopped herself. Her back was to Jake, and she could see her reflection in the window of her door. Except, the person, in the reflection, wasn't her. Who was she?
"I love you..." Jake sighed. He shoved his hands in his pockets again. "I miss you, the real you." He turned t o walk away, but a hand pulled him back. He hadn't even heard her run towards him, she had done it so quickly.
"Don't walk away from me..." She whispered. Then she plunged up and collided with his lips. For the first in years, she remembered who she was, who her father raised her to be, and who she loved.
Nathan sighed and looked around the room. He had just got done making this room for Natalie. She was coming home tomorrow, and he wanted things to be perfect.
"Honestly?" He asked, looking back at Haley. Haley nodded. "I have no idea." He said. His voice was lost and lonely. He laughed a sad laugh to himself. "I have NO idea!" He said, his voice a little louder. "I was sitting in my car, and Natalie wasn't doing as great and... I gave up. You were distant, and I just gave up, just like that. I can't even remember taking it off, I just remember thinking that you didn't want me anymore, so then when I looked at my hand, I had the ring off, never put it on again." His voice was almost angry, as if he was holding her habit of being distant against her.
" I was scared Nathan, but I never once thought we were over." She folded her arms on her chest and looked at him. She didn't know what to say now, she had nothing to say, and he seemed to have nothing to say either.
"Im sorry." Was all he could say. He didn't expect this to be some huge gesture. It was just three simple words. But it was all he could get out. And as Haley smiled and nodded, he could tell they were enough.
"Me too." She smiled. She stepped into him again, this time she wrapped her arms around him first, holding him as tightly as she could. For the first time in a long time, she had butterflies in her stomach from being so close to him. " I love you." She whispered. Once again, three small words. They were so tender and important that it took Nathan's breath away at first. He could even say it, because he couldn't believe she did.
Finally, he got his composure back. "I love you too." He smiled, lifting her chin and meeting her lips. "Move in with me?" He asked as he pulled away. Haley smiled brightly and reached her hand to his face, tracing his outline with her index finger. She didn't want to speak, she didn't want to ruin anything. So she smiled and nodded, standing on her tippy toes to kiss him again.
"Brooke?" Lucas finally said, after watching her cry for what felt like forever. He dropped the papers in his hands, they slowly spread out all over the carpet in front of him, and he stepped on them to get to her. He watched her broken emotion flood out. He hadn't even seen how terribly he had been treating her, but from this moment on, he didn't want to do it again. "Oh baby, Im so sorry." He said, finally, he moved faster. Rushing to her side and pulling her into his arms. She cried into his chest, not speaking. She pulled back from him, and looked up into his eyes. He was back, finally. It was him, she could see that light in his eyes, for the first time in weeks.
"I've missed you." Brooke whispered.
Lucas nodded and wiped away her tears with his thumb. "Me too." He whispered. "I love you." He smiled, pulling her into him.
"I Love you too." She smiled, her tears had finally stopped. He may have been the one to make her cry, but he was also the only would could have made her stop. And he did. He made her stop.
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the dark that fills your mind,
You finally find, you and I, Collide...
Okay... let me know please!
Michelley P.