Pleasant Surprises

Chapter 5

Guys let me just say again how humbled I am that you all like my story. I want to thank each and every one of you for your reviews – they are so informative and I take all the advice that you guys give me to heart. Truly, your reviews are what make me want to keep writing.

I know that a lot of you are iffy because this story is Mer/Mark – please do not think that my loyalties have changed or that I want this to happen on the show…let me remind you guys that the reason I started to write this story was because I needed an outlet from my frustration with Derek and his indecisiveness in regards to Meredith. I know Derek loves Meredith but he needs to act and he will act here – he just won't get the girl this time - because for every second of every day that you spend either doubting your love or fearing it you run the risk of losing that love.

I will continue to write Mer/Der fics…I promise…but I would love you guys to take this venture with me and read my thoughts portrayed through this story. Who knows it might just be therapeutic.

Happy Reading!

Mark downed his third shot of tequila and motioned with his hand to get another one. He was not going to care if in the morning he was going to feel like shit. He was not going to care if in the morning he would have to pray to the porcelain god before he went to work. All he wanted to do was drink and forget about his problems and about her…Meredith. He downed the shot quickly and returned to his thoughts. Meredith - the one person that he couldn't have but apparently the first person that he had managed to have an actual conversation with – without any lies and without any manipulation – in a very long time. He had been himself with her and was not afraid to talk to her about anything. He had only talked to her three times and this third time was the longest he had been with her. The other two were not even more than five minutes. What was wrong with him? Did trouble always follow him? Was it bad karma? What was it about her that made him feel…genuine? Genuine was not even a word that fit in his vocabulary until today and that thought petrified him. He wanted to be in control of his actions and this woman – whom he barely knew – was spiraling him out of control. How the hell was that possible?

What was happening to him? He loved women – always had and probably always would. It didn't matter: tall, short, dark, light, petite, not-so-petite…all women were beautiful to him. They were fascinating creatures and he was in awe of them. He couldn't get enough of them. He had never wanted to settle down with just one woman. The way he viewed life was that there were so many women and so little time. It might be wrong to live with that perception and it had gotten him into a lot of trouble but he had never been the one to leave heartbroken from a relationship – it had always been the other way around. He was a dog…plain and simple and women loved him in spite of it.

Then Addison had come into his life and he thought that she was the one that would make him be what every women wanted him to be: faithful. Problem was that she was married to his best friend so he set out to find a woman that would at least have some of the qualities Addison had and in his venture he had found love, pain and even some psychotic women -- all this in search for the perfect mate that seemed to elude him most of his life. It was ironic: one day he had woken up and realized that he was tired of the way he had lived his life. He wanted something more; he wanted a life and in order to have one he needed to fall in love and stay in love with one woman. Unfortunately, he had wanted his best friend's wife to be that woman. He realized now that if he would have controlled his impulses a lot of what was happening to him today would not be so tragic.

Then he had finally gotten the girl – amidst the guilt and the turmoil – he had managed to make Addison fall in love with him and what did he do? He cheated on her as well. The grass wasn't always greener on the other side, he thought to himself. He had been ecstatic when Derek had come to Seattle because that meant that Addison and him would have a clear road ahead and they could make their love work but after a few months and a few fights he began to wonder what it would be like to find someone else and that had killed him and made him feel guiltier – he had lost his best friend, his brother, because of Addison and then after just a few short months he was already wondering what it would be like to find someone that would not fight with him or maybe not have the guilt and baggage that they carried as a couple.

At first the thought had floored him because he had been so sure that if he had Addison he would want or need for anything or anyone else but that was just not true and that fact had made him go out and seek someone else – just for the sheer hell of it. It might have been that he had been hell bent on destroying their relationship because the destruction that they had caused certainly was not worth the outcome. He did love Addison and she was a wonderful person but maybe they had not measured – or if he was honest – he did not measure the repercussions of falling for her. He had actually thought that Derek and him would probably be able to move on from this and they still hadn't and that scared him. He had been so wrong. His egocentricity had made him blind to Derek's feelings and he recognized that a little too late.

Instead, Addison had found him with another woman in a restaurant. He had not been caught in bed with her, they were just having dinner. Addison had walked up to them, nodded her head and continued on her way to her table with a doctor friend of hers. She had known in that instant that he had cheated or was about to cheat – there was no necessity to deny it. He had come home to find her bags packed and her ticket to Seattle. That was when she had told him that she was going to go and get Derek back. That loving him had been a mistake and that he would never change. That he was incapable of fidelity and that she had lost out on her husband and the chance to reconcile because she had wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. That she was sorry she didn't follow her head instead of her heart. That is when he broke the news to her about Meredith – and he did it maliciously, he could confess that to himself at least. He had found out about Meredith when a good friend of his had gone to a conference in Seattle and had breakfast with Derek. To this day he did not know if Derek told their mutual friend because he was truly happy to have Meredith in his life or because he wanted Mark and Addison to know he had moved on. But from what he had seen, heard and finally now met Meredith he could see how Derek would be excited to talk to their friend about the new woman in his life.

"Can I buy you a drink?" Mark turned to see who had offered to buy him his next drink and smiled as he recognized the nurse that he had bumped into in the hall when he fled from Meredith's room. "Why don't I buy you the drink? He questioned. "Sort of an apology for almost running you down at the hospital…" He continued, as he winked his eye at her. This was going to be so easy. And he was going to at least be able to be distracted for a couple of hours.

"I accept." The nurse responded. "Dr. Sloan, right?" she questioned.

"Correct." He said, as his eyes twinkled. He could have this nurse right here and right now if he so chose. "What's your name?" he questioned. Before taking her to bed he had to at least know her name. Yep, he had decided he was already taking her to bed. True to form, Sloan, true to form. Why would anything change in Seattle? He was who he was, right? A fucking dog.

"Tiffany." She said, as she smiled and called the bartender over. "I'll have an apple martini. How about you Dr. Sloan?" she questioned as she smiled at him. This man was the most beautiful man she had seen in a long time. She had to have him. She knew all the rumors that were going around the hospital about him and Addison and even Derek but she didn't care. Rumors or not, this man was not accompanied by anyone at this particular moment.

"Another shot." He told the bartender. Then he turned his attention to the woman sitting next to him. "What brings you here Tiffany?" he questioned. "And please call me Mark." He said, and instantly regretted his words. He had told Meredith that just a while ago and while he had meant it with Meredith and even with this nurse, the sense of déjà vu got him to thinking back on Meredith and her laying in the hospital bed probably alone and wondering why the hell he had left so abruptly. Stop it, Sloan, he told himself. Do not think about her or about what she is feeling or not feeling right now.

"Long day at work." She said, bringing Mark out of his reverie. "Tired…but I needed a drink after the day I had." She commented. "How about you Mark? Are you expecting anyone to walk in that door or can I have your undivided attention?" she said, as she smiled seductively.

"At this moment you are the only woman that I am looking at." He stated as he inched closer to her. "To our health." He said, as he raised his shot glass and she raised her martini glass. "Pleasure meeting you – and of course bumping into you again." He said, slowly.

"To a long and pleasurable night." She stated; her intent clear and with no room for doubt.

"Listen. I don't have a place yet. I am at the Westin Hotel. You can go back with me there or you can invite me to your place. The choice is yours." He said, pointedly.

"Your hotel room is closer." She pointed out.

"It's settled then. You ready?" he asked. All of a sudden he just wanted to get out of there as fast and as quickly as possible. He wanted to be able to concentrate on this women's body and stop all thoughts that led to Addison, Derek or even Meredith. He needed to forget about them – if only for a couple of hours. He didn't know what would happen tomorrow or the next day but what he did know was that at that moment he was taking a woman back to his hotel room because he needed to forget – forget for a moment who he was and what he had done and who he was thinking of at the most inopportune times.

"Ready." She responded.

Mark held his hand out and felt when her hand wrapped around hers. He hoped that he was doing the right thing. He didn't want to see this woman after tonight – tops tomorrow morning -- and he would not even acknowledge her at the hospital. "You do realize that tonight is the only night we might talk or see each other. I am not going to remember you tomorrow or the next day." He didn't want to sound like a dick but it was true. He had enough problems already.

"I just want one night." Tracy said, as she took his hand from his and wrapped her arm around his waist, lightly squeezing.

"As long as we understand each other – and there are no expectations." Mark said and held her tighter.

"None whatsoever Mark. None whatsoever."

GA…GA…GA…GA…

Derek and Addison sat down at the restaurant table and awkwardly looked at each other. How did they become strangers? They used to be the envy of elite New York. They were spotted everywhere – at the most expensive restaurants, at the most prestigious parties and at the most lavish gala events – but most importantly wherever they had been spotted they were always happy and chatting with each other as if they had not seen each other in ages. They never lacked conversation and now they didn't even know how to start a conversation that would end their marriage. "Derek how did we get here?" she questioned. She wanted to be the one that would point out the elephant in the room. This was unbearable. They both knew it was over – they needed to end it out loud.

"I honestly don't know Addie." He said. "I think that we lost each other between work, patients and friends. I can't point to a specific time when I stopped loving you. I never thought I did – until I saw you in bed with Mark. Even then I didn't stop loving you. I was hurt beyond belief and knew that we would never be together again. I walked out of our house with the firm intention of never looking back and never seeing you again." Derek said. "Then you came to Seattle and I was with Meredith and even if this hurts you I was happy. I had given up on you and given up on my friendship with Mark and was happy." Derek said, as he looked deeply into her eyes. "I'm sorry."

"Have you ever wondered why you didn't tell her the truth? I wonder sometimes – if you were so happy and Meredith was the one for you – why not come clean with her? Why not tell her that you were married and why not seek me out, get a divorce and then come to her with a plan for the future?" Addison asked. "Derek you just left like I didn't exist and you didn't confront your problems. I had to come to you to make you stare them in the face and finally decide if you wanted to make things work or if you wanted to let go." She knew that one day – if not today – she was going to have to come clean to him and tell him the truth about her living arrangement and her ex-situation with Mark. She just didn't know if she was going to have the balls to tell him tonight.

"I think that I have been afraid…afraid of loving someone else and then realizing that love was not meant for me. Love is hard Addie. If I couldn't make it with you – after 11 years of love and devotion – how was I going to start anew?" he questioned. It was weird. All of a sudden he had these feelings that were coming to the forefront. Maybe the failed relationship with Addison had made him a little weary and a little scared. Maybe the failed relationship with Meredith made him intent on never opening up his heart to pain and betrayal again.

"So why try it then?" Addison knew that it was over. However, she owed him this much. He was in such bad shape and it partly had to do with her and what she did to him. She was hurting but she knew that her infidelity had put the last nail in the coffin. She had to take some accountability and in turn help him with his sordid thoughts and insecurities. She and Mark did this to him and now it was time to help him. He was sinking fast and she would try to save him – even if it was for another woman.

"I couldn't help but try – she didn't give me a choice. Meredith was this creature that came into my life and made it better --made me better. I was so torn up inside Addie. She made me laugh and that was so important and she fought me so hard in the beginning that it just made me want her more. Before I knew it, before I even recognized it, I was in love." Derek said, as he smiled slightly. "She was a burst of sunshine in my otherwise dreary existence."

"So now you have your chance." Addison said, as tears pricked her eyes. "I finally realized that it doesn't matter how much and how long I try to make you love me again or try to make things the way that they were, we're just never going to succeed. You wanted to try again because it was the right thing to do – your heart was never in it. I realized that a long time ago I just refused to let it interfere with my attempt to win you back. Why? Because I don't do defeat well." Addison confessed. "You know that as well as I do."

"I did think that I could make it work. At least I knew that I wanted to try. It was a mistake, though. I may have lost her and there's nothing that I can do. I chose you and it seems that she has moved on. I can't blame her for wanting to." It still hurt. Her having someone else to confide in and talk to.

"She loves you." Addison stated. "I know she does. She's just afraid that you will hurt her again. That's why I told you to not hurt her. She told me – in her drugged state – that she wanted to pick you and that she wanted it to be you." Addison confessed. "She loves you Derek. It's not too late."

"It might be too late because I don't want to hurt her and I'm afraid that is what I am going to do. I always hurt her. First, when I lied to her about you and then for choosing you. I can't make that right Addie. I can't make her not remember that. Did you know that the Chief had an affair with Ellis Gray?" he questioned. "He didn't leave his wife because he didn't know if he could make Ellis happy. He sacrificed himself for her – for what he thought was the best thing." Derek said, as tears threatened to flow down his face.

"So you think that's what you have to do? Sacrifice yourself? Have history repeat itself?" Addison questioned. "Derek please don't do this to yourself. You deserve to be happy and if she's your happiness then fight for it – don't' step back and let someone else ruin your happiness. Fight for her. If you love her then she's worth it."

"Finn can make her happy." Derek pointed out. "I talked to him for a while and he is a decent guy and I don't hate him and he doesn't seem to have as much baggage as I do. I think he can make her happy."

"Finn can make her content, Derek." Addison interjected. "There's a huge difference. And if I had to choose – and I'm willing to bet that Meredith feels the same – content will never outweigh happiness."

"What about Mark?" Derek shot back. He didn't want to think of his problems with Meredith right now. "I want to know. Did you two have a one night stand or did you have more than that? How long was your affair? Or was it not one? Was it just an infidelity of one night?" All of a sudden it was of utter importance to Derek to know if losing the woman that he loved was worth it.

The moment of truth had arrived. She knew that it would only be a matter of time. She heard as Derek continued: "Mark made it seem that you two had a relationship of some sort – whether it was before you guys slept together or after I don't know. I wasn't clear on that."

Addison shifted uncomfortably in her chair and met Derek's gaze. "I came back to Seattle to try and make things work with you. I didn't come as soon as you left because Mark convinced me that I should make things work out with him." She stated, as she saw Derek's face change from mild curiosity to astonishment. She recognized that he finally understood that she had tried to make a go of it with Mark. "Derek you and I were so distant from each other and you had walked out and I remembered telling you that if you walked out the door to our house that we didn't have a chance to make things work. Derek you left and I found the best way I thought possible to put my life back together."

"Did you live with him?" Derek questioned. "In our home?"

"Yes. We lived together a few months and then he went and slept with another woman…"

"That's when you decided to come back." Derek stated. He wasn't questioning it. He was telling her that he finally understood what had taken her so long to come looking for him. "You were in love with him." He told her. "You wanted things to work with him. Why come and ruin my life? "

"I thought I loved him. Yes. I think I realized that I had made a mistake and wanted to rectify but it was too late and I didn't want to accept it. You had moved on. I had let you move on and you seemed happy and I hated that. I hated the fact that I had ruined our relationship, or at least, was the one that had fucked up so bad that the finger could be pointed at me and no one would defend me. Everyone didn't know what you and I had been through. How would people know that I felt so lonely…that I felt you and I were strangers even though we slept in the same bed? Mark. Mark was the only one that understood me, that could read me better than anyone else because he was suffering from your neglect as well." Addison regretted the words as soon as they had come out of her mouth. "Derek…I didn't mean to imply that this was all your fault but Mark and I…"

"I understand Addison." Derek said, as he held up a hand. "I have realized that I was neglectful and that was one of the reasons why I decided to try to make things work for you and me…but you see…if you would have told me that you lived with Mark and lets face it…he did what he does to every woman he wants…cheat on them…then I would not have decided to sacrifice the woman that I was in love with and truly did love. Meredith and I were happy Addison. We were trying to build something together. You came back to ruin that. You're right I should have told her the truth since the beginning so when you came to sabotage everything she would not have felt blindsided. And maybe at this juncture we would be happy and you and Mark would be far away from here."

"I didn't want to sabotage…" Addison tried, but Derek was having none of that. "Save it." He said, as he got up from the table. "I would have been able to move on from our failed marriage and at least try to be friends with you if you would not have come to me full of lies and deceit. Addison do you understand how much I have lost – you don't…well let me enlighten you." He stated as he took money out of his wallet and threw it on the table. "I have lost my wife. I have lost my best friend and I have lost the woman that I love -- for what? Losing you and Mark…well it was something that I had accepted but Meredith, losing Meredith because I decided to be the good husband well that's something that I will never be able to move on from. You tell me she loves me and she wants me to be the one. Well I don't even know if I have it in me anymore to try. You have destroyed everything that I believed in and just as I was about to rebuild, you throw me back down again. So thank you Addison, thank you for ruining my life in New York. Thank you for ruining my new beginning with Meredith and thank you Addison, thank you for telling me the fucking truth in the most opportune time…"

With that said he walked towards the door leaving a tearful Addison behind. "Well that went well…"

GA…GA…GA…GA…

Okay guys don't kill me for making Addison suffer in this chapter and don't hate Derek for being such a dick. I had to write this scene because I feel – in my heart – that Addison did Derek wrong and she must face the consequences of her actions.

Derek needed to get all his frustration out and now he has. Remember guys I stated in the beginning I don't hate Addison, on the contrary, I really like her character but her character needs to rebuild and that's what I intend to do.

Please let me know what you guys thought about this chapter. I live for your reviews!