I Think… I'm in Love…

Chapter 2

To love again

To love again

To love again

To love again

To love again
Drowning in tears that wont be me
I will soon be free from the chains of all this pain inside
And though I cry it wont be long till I regain the strength to know
I can go on
I will find my way through the heart break I will not give up on love
I believe
I will learn to love again I will learn to trust
Once this heart can start to mend
I will learn to
Learn to love again.

I looked at my alarm clock and sighed.

'New school… Yay… NOT!' I thought to my self as I got out of bed. I turned off my alarm clock and went to get dressed. I grabbed my usual outfit and put it on, but not the jacket, not yet. I looked at the cuts I had on my arms. They were all pink since they were now scares, but I wondered how I got them.

I put on the jacket and looked around my room. It was a nice big room, with my guitar and other instruments in it, and an easel in a corner with a lot of paintings I did when I was younger. I sighed and went to the vanity I had on one side of the room. I sat down on the blue-cushioned stool and started brushing my hair. I noticed a picture on the mirror. I took it down and looked at it.

It was a picture of me and a boy. I was wearing a different outfit from what I usually wore: a black off-shoulders skirt with a rose in the middle, black jeans, and black high tops. I had goggles around my neck and black elbow-length gloves, my hair in a high ponytail and black eye shadow on my eye lids.

The boy next to me looked like me if I were a boy. He had messy dark brown hair and brown eyes. He wore a black t-shirt with a red long-sleeve shirt under it, blue jeans, and black sneakers. He had his arm around my shoulders and I was leaning on him.

I sighed, wishing I could remember who he was.

I grabbed my backpack and my flute case and went down stairs.

"Kannichi wa nii-sama," I said as I popped my head into the kitchen.

Josh looked up from his newspaper and smiled at me. "You still remember Japanese?"

"A little bit," I said with a grin. I sat down and took an apple and banana.

"That's all you're going to eat?" he asked.

"I'm not that hungry," I replied as I started to eat the apple. He sighed and went back to reading the newspaper.

I finished the last of the apple and ate the banana next. When I was done I grabbed my stuff and kissed Josh on the cheek. "See you later nii-sama," I called as I ran to the garage.

I put my flute case on the back of my bike and tied it up with a bungee cord. I put my backpack on and got on my bike.

As I rode to school I saw Philly Phil walk out of a house five blocks away from my house. I grinned and rode faster.

"HEY! PHILLY PHIL!" I called as I rode up next to him.

He jumped and turned as I started to slow down.

"Sorry, did I scare you?" I asked.

"A little… I'm not used to being yelled at," he grinned at me.

I smiled back as I paddled beside him.

She smiled back at me making my stomach do somersaults again. Why do I get this feeling when I'm around her? 'Could I possibly be… in love with her?' I asked myself as she looked down at her feet.

I looked down at my feet, wondering what to say. My mouth felt dry and my heart was beating a hundred miles pure hour. 'What's wrong with me?' I asked as we kept quiet. 'Why am I feeling this way towards Philly Phil…? I think… I'm in love with him…' I shook my head. 'Don't be silly Pashe, you can't be in love with him yet… you only met him last week,'

I rode next to him, trying my best not to blush at the thought of being his girlfriend.

I finally got my voice back and asked, "Do you play any other instruments besides upright bass?" I asked.

He looked over and stared at me for a second before saying, "I also play bass guitar."

I smiled "I do, too."

"Really?" he asked.

"Yup! Forget why I started to do bass… but it was fun learning how to play it," I said as we came into the school yard.

"That's cool," he said. I grinned and went off to put my bike in the rack. Then I walked into school and went looking for my first class, which was music.

As I walked I noticed boys looking at me in a weird way, as if they thought I was cute. I shuddered at the thought and kept walking. I noticed a boy following me. He was probably older than me with black hair and eyes. I walked faster, and he did the same. After a while, I finally stopped and turned to him. "What do you want?" I snapped.

He jumped and fell backwards in surprise, and looked up at me. Blushing slightly, he said, "Nothing. Just wanted to see if you were the new girl,"

"What if I am?" I asked.

"Well, for one thing, you'll need to learn the ground rules around here. Second thing… you're really cute, and I was wondering if you wanted to be my girlfriend."

"Sorry, but no," I said as I turned around, and continued to class.

Someone grabbed my wrist and slammed me into a locker. I look up to see the black-haired boy.

"Be my girlfriend, we'll have a lot of fun together," a smirk played across his lips. Tears watered in my eyes as I tried to get out of his grip.

"Let her go Blake!" Philly Phil's voice shouted from down the hall.

I let out a sigh of relief as Philly Phil came up and pushed the boy off of me.

"What is she, your girlfriend?" Blake asked, making the blood rush to my cheeks.

"No, she's just my friend. Besides, I doubt she would want to go out with you." Philly Phil then took my hand and led me away.
I was about to look back when he whispered, "Don't look back." I nodded and continued to looked ahead.

When we were close to the music room I smiled up at "Thanks for getting me out of that jam. Um you can let go of my hand now," I giggled as he looked down at our hands and took his away quickly, turning a bright red.

When we were close to the music room, Patience smiled up at me and said "Thanks for getting me out of that jam. Um you can let go of my hand now," I looked down; I was still holding her hand, which was very embarrassing. I quickly took my hand away making her giggle. I felt my face go a bright red as we continued to class wishing that the holding hands moment could have lasted a little longer. I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye. She was looking at her feet, thinking about something.

I looked down at my feet thinking about what my brother would do if he found out about this. He would kill Philly Phil... or maybe not. I smiled as we came into the class room. Everyone in the room looked up.

"Hey Patience, wondered when you where going to come," Lil' D said pointing a drum-stick at me.

"Sorry. Nii-sama thought it would be better to go in a week after visiting the school," I shrugged. "Don't know why, though." I grinned. "He's weird that way."

"Who's nii-sama?" Lil' D asked in confusion.

"Nii-sama means big brother in Japanese," I explained.

"So… why are you calling him nii-sama when you're not Japanese?" Lil' D asked.

I shrugged. "It's a habit, forget how it started…"

Sunny came into the room and smiled at all of us. "Alright now, we need to start class off by tearing down the walls of convention with the raking ball of creativity, to see how Patience plays," he said

"So, you want me to be creative in music?" I asked.

"Exactly," Sunny said. "What instrument do you want to play?"

"I'll play my flute." I took out the parts of my flute and put it together. I thought of a song, then started to play, I will Learn to Love Again.

"Now, how dose that make you fell," Sunny asked after I finished playing the chorus.

"Like my heart's been crushed into a million pieces," I mumbled.

"Alright… but don't just tell me; show me."

I nodded and played again. I felt like crying as I played, but I held back my tears and kept going. When I stopped, I looked down at my feet, a little embarrassed.

"That was good, Patience." Sunny looked at me closely. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," I said, giving a soft smile.

Sunny studied me for a minute before shrugging. "Alright, if you're sure." He turned to the rest of the class. A small tear from my eye, but whipped it away quickly.

"Alright, here's the warm-up for today," Sunny said.